I have to clarify some things about me that have been going around in this paparazzi post. Especially this photo..
First the 100% Huggable Care Bear shirt. I don’t believe that simply advertising myself as huggable (as opposed to, say, well-endowed or extremely wealthy) gets me an unlimited supply of poon. I will continue wearing it even though there is yellow stainage in the arm pit area.
Second, the floral pink umbrella. In Rio during Carnival I accidentally stole a girl’s potted plant costume hat. Here’s the hat…
The next day it was raining so I needed an umbrella. What’s cool about most cities in South America is that if it starts raining all these umbrella salesmen come out of the woodwork to sell you umbrellas (duh) and trash bag ponchos. I bought one in Rio that matched both the hat and the festivities as well, and not because of anything potentially related to a deep deep latent homosexuality.
It’s unfortunate that the Care Bear shirt matches ravishingly with my pink umbrella, but it’s more unfortunate that this town is so starchy that people stared and made low volume disparaging comments. Yeah but they’re too scared to say it to MY FACE… except for this one guy but he was pretty big so I pretended not to hear.
Postscript: Funny, when I grabbed the photo from pervert meathead’s blog, the filename was gayhairy.jpg.