16 Different Types Of Game

Asshole Game: This is where you fire off relentless volleys of jabs, teases, and light insults that act as foreplay and make her ask, “Who is this guy?” It’s important to get the one-night-stand when using asshole game because by the next day her vagina will have dried up.

Baller Game: Roll up to the club looking sharp with your crew. Throw paper in everyone’s face and wait for the girl who likes money to make her presence known.

Caveman Game (a.k.a. Brazilian Game): You grab a girl in the club, pull her close to you, and have a very basic conversation for one minute (if that) before you try to kiss her. Ignore her inevitable resistance by holding her body and head in place. Even if she keeps her lips completely closed while you kiss, try to open them with your tongue.

Cocaine Game: You’re at the club talking to a girl and drop a casual line about having coke back at your penthouse, which is really a shitty row house but she won’t care as long as she sees that pile of coke. I’ve never run this game but it’s a no-brainer if you use drugs. Just don’t lie and say you have coke when you don’t because otherwise she’ll throw a tantrum.

Celebrity Game: This is when the girl thinks you’re important for some reason. From my experience I can say that girls seem to dig the fact that you’re known, even if in one city, even if it’s for something like banging girls. I’m pretty sure that guys don’t start bands only for the music.

Cool Guy Game: You casually drop all the interesting things you do (or have done) while making the girl laugh every now and then. The key to this game is fun conversation that makes the girl feel lucky she met you. Essential for daytime approaches.

Hail Mary Game: Go to the club, take a deep breath, and approach 10-20 girls. Ignore the ones who try to make you feel like a loser. Used for when you go to a place where you have zero social proof or a look not desired by the natives.

Internet Game: Gather your best photos and then craft a cocky first message with the occasional undercapitalization so it doesn’t look like you’re trying too hard. Blast 300 girls on Myspace, Plenty Of Fish, or Mingle, try to get a date from the three that respond, then freak out at the “updated” look of the one who comes through. Try to bang her anyway.

Last Man Standing Game: You’re the only guy who didn’t dip, pass out, or puke. Her friends all went home leaving you two alone at 4am in the morning. You’re both drunk and horny so the only logical thing to do is fuck (or eat greasy food).

Owner’s Son Game: You go to a club where you happen know the entire staff. They let you get away with things that normal patrons cannot, like dancing on the bar with your shirt off while drinking straight from a bottle of Jack. Girl’s notice this and approach you because they figure you’re the owner’s son. The only guy I know who has run this game successfully is Virgle Kent.

Friend Of The Owner’s Son Game: You get the residual, lesser-quality pussy from being the friend of the guy that all the girls think is the owner’s son.

Pizza Game: Stand in front of a late night gyro or jumbo slice pizza spot and approach girls walking by. Insult them when they don’t respond positively to your comments about the sexual nature of their bodies.

“Rape” Game: Used for when a girl is acting either difficult or prudish. Drag her to your place and tell her you’re going to have her way with her and there’s nothing she can do about it. Throw her on the bed and remove her clothing intensely.With some girls you need to simulate rape conditions to get the bang, but be careful because rape game correlates highly to unprotected sex. The last thing a girl cares about when getting fantasy raped is using a condom. (Legal disclaimer: consent is required to have sex with a woman.)

Solo Dolo Game: You go alone to a decent bar or lounge looking sharp, drink fine spirits from a prime spot, and wait for a girl who doesn’t mind anonymous sex to give you a subtle look that invites conversation. Casually drop the convenient location of your condo or hotel suite early in the conversation.

Sleazy Weasel Game: You’re always pining to get back into her place or yours, because once isolated in a bedroom you know that sex has a very good chance of occurring. In fact most of your game revolves around making this happen. For example, a couple times I purposefully missed the last subway train home to ask the girl to crash on her couch, knowing she wouldn’t refuse. And then I bang. It pays to be sleazy.

Starving Artist Game: You casually drop that you are an artist of some sort trying to produce something remarkable while barely making ends meet. It helps if you have a weathered look with dark circles under your eyes so she can see how you’re suffering for your art. Since she meets more lawyers, doctors, and cubicle slaves than artists, she will be curious about you all the way to her bedroom. You can’t take her back to yours since you live in your dad’s basement, a fact that legitimizes your artist status to her even further. (Note: Starving Artist game doesn’t play as well in non-Western cultures where being a lawyer or doctor is far less common).

Game is multi-dimensional so it’s rare you only use one type of game to bang a girl. For example my game is strongest (as of this year, 2010) when I start with Asshole Game and then end with Sleazy Weasel Game and a sprinkling of Rape Game. If I’m in a hipster bar I run Starving Artist Game and Cool Guy Game. In a foreign country though I’m forced to predominantly run Hail Mary Game and Last Man Standing Game, though I would like to move to Solo Dolo Game in a few years. In Washington D.C. sometimes I can get away with only running Celebrity Game or, if I’m out with Virgle Kent, Friend Of The Owner’s Son Game. As you can see there are many ways to skin a cat.

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