Always Have A Plan B

Right now we’re living in an age of overconfident women who believe the best way to find their Prince Charming is to play the field for a decade or three until deciding that they’re on the physical appearance downswing. Since it’s unlikely you’ll be chosen as their end game provider man (and if you do you’re probably doing something wrong), that means you’ll have to put up with a lot of anti-social behavior and flaking in order to get casual sex. The sad fact is that no matter how tight your game is, how many dozens of girls you’ve fucked, or how hard your two-week Brazilian girlfriend used to suck your cock, Western women who are lower quality than what you’ve had before will try to treat you like crap.

The quickest path to unhappiness with dating is to hope that a girl will please you, treat you with respect, or even show up on dates. While I do think it’s rude for a girl to treat you poorly when you haven’t done the same to her, she is free to act in any way she wishes. She has that choice because it’s not against the law for her to send a last-minute cancellation text or to not pay attention when you’re telling a story that means a lot to you. After putting out our best game, her behavior is not something we can control.

But you can control how you deal with women. You control who you ask out on dates. You control who you reward with attention. You control whether to contact her again after sex. You also control how to plan dates so that things will still work out in your favor even if she disappoints you. This means you should always have a backup plan so that when a girl cancels, you’ll have an alternative that is as superior as going out with her.

It never happens that I’m sitting at home, upset that a girl cancelled on me. I’m never trying to analyze why she changed her mind at the last-minute. I’m never thinking of what witty or cocky text to send to get things back on track. It’s impossible for a girl to upset me because I was never counting on her in the first place. Here are three things I do when it comes to dating:

1. I plan dates on nights where I’ve decided that I’m going out no matter what, whether she comes through or not. In Poland I would do a first date on a Wednesday night, the same night I know of a club that has ladies night. It’s no big deal if she flakes because I will still have a good time flirting with women.

I don’t schedule a date on days where there is nothing going on. If she flakes on my ass, that means I’m in danger of getting stuck at home, sifting through my porn collection. The worst thing you can do is wait for her send a confirmation text to know if you should hop in the shower and start getting ready. Don’t give her that power.

2. I tell her to meet me in a location that is close to another good spot I can bounce to. Many times a girl will take you for granted and put no effort in helping with the date conversation. Or she’ll nurse her beer until it tastes like camel urine, saying she wants to “take it easy tonight.” If after one drink she has not performed to a standard that you would’ve expected based on your original meeting, wish her a good night and ditch her. You’ll already know where to go.

3. I take a book. If she’s acting stupid then I take out my book and start reading. She can drink alone or pretend like she has to catch up on her text messaging. The absolute worst that can happen to me on a date night is that I have a couple beers and read a good book.

It should get to the point where your plan B is decent enough that you actually don’t mind when a girl flakes on you. It has happened to me where I’ve actually hoped a girl would flake so that I can do the backup. The strange thing is that the better backup plan you have, the less likely you’ll get flaked on. It’s almost like girls can feel that your night is not hinging on whether she makes an appearance or not.

Twice in the past couple of months a girl flaked on a date, I executed the backup plan, and had a one-night stand with another girl. Don’t be surprised if a girl flaking on you sets the wheels in motion for you to meet a girl that’s even better. These days when a girl flakes, she’s often doing me a favor.

Read Next: 7 Things You Can Do To Improve Your Game Right Now

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  • Pete M

    How do you come up with this stuff? You’re a God damn genius Roosh.

  • Pete M

    Also, it’s been ages since your last book review – new reviews would be awesome.

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com The G Manifesto

    Advanced move:

    Triple Book Yourself.

    Get three girls cooking on the same night. And also make sure its a night you were going out anyways.

    Bounce around and meet all three, swoop which one is “performing” the best.

    Don’t forget to swoop on girls in transition as you are bouncing around.

    Can’t lose like Parker Lewis.

    - MPM

  • outlaw josey wales

    This may be a stupid question, but suppose you bring a book (and do you mean an actual book or your Kindle?) and the date is not what you want. You ditch, and go to Plan B location. What do you do with your book? Just position your self at a good bar location and read or pretend to do so?

    I just hate to hold anything in my hands, so the whole bring a book (or anything I have to hold and take care of) thing seems “wrong.”

  • Anonymous

    My brazilian father always told me “always have a backup girlfriend”so from growing up in the US myself,Ive learned this to hold true.I like to stack girls.I once met one for a dinner thing,she was trippin so I just called another on a booty call that I fucked a couple weeks prior.either way I was knee deep in pussy that nite,woke up to a morning bj.glad I listened to my pops.

  • Alex

    I like your stuff Roosh. However, I always got to remind myself after reading most of your posts that there are still good women out there.

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com The G Manifesto

    outlaw -

    “You ditch, and go to Plan B location. What do you do with your book?”

    Bring one that can fit in your back pocket or inside Custom Suit.

    ie The Art of War by Sun Tzu

    Not need to bring the Almanac.

    - MPM

  • The Inlaw Josie Whales

    Ha. I was also wondering if you bring a kindle or a real book?
    And if it’s a real book, how come you’re buying real books when you’ve got a kindle?

  • Roosh

    Books are more for when you don’t have another spot to bounce to (maybe a Monday night date). If you know of another spot, it’s safe to leave the book at home.

    Is further instruction needed? In my next post I can describe how to put on a condom, wash your balls, or make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Let me know…

  • Anonymous

    Yes, what’s the best way to wash my balls? I had one of those golf ball washers, but it really didn’t do the job! :)

  • JJS

    Western women are such cunts for the most part. Most American girls I know are expecting a Prince Charming to initiate everything and make their fantasy dreams come true, which include doing all the talking, paying, and working. Oh, I never thought dumb bitches would contribute so much to the decline of the West.

    Thank god I moved to Asia.

  • http://johnnyshornofplenty.wordpress.com/ Johnny Milfquest

    This post is Gold.

    Outcome independence, abundance mindset, the vibe, etc. Its all here.

    This is the stuff that I SHOULD know already, but somehow I keep forgetting that enjoyment and happiness is MY responsibility.

    Its not the responsibility of some random woman or women in general.

  • http://two.cedonulli.com Jake

    Leave it to G to double cheese it. Really, how many times are we going to read the ‘Art of War’? What sort of custom suit still flows right with a damn BOOK in a pocket?

    Hilarious. Love reading that guy’s stuff, always something amusing.

    I usually make the same identical ‘date’ plans with two cute things. If they both end up in, I cancel on one. Just gets her that much more hamstered out for next time, where I’ll cancel on somebody else. I learn EVERY flake move from American chicks. Don’t bitch about it, just do the same thing yourself.

    First hangout recipe: http://two.cedonulli.com/2011/07/first-dates/

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com The G Manifesto

    Jake,

    “Really, how many times are we going to read the ‘Art of War’? What sort of custom suit still flows right with a damn BOOK in a pocket?”

    I have a copy that is the same size as a pack of smokes.

    Flows perfect.

    - MPM

  • Shallow Hal

    I probably shouldn’t bring a copy of Bang with me. I don’t think that would go over too well. LOL

  • http://todayinwhitehistory.wordpress.com/ WhiteHistory

    I like this post. It reminds me of all the shitty things I had to deal with in the past.

    Back when I was single, I developed a very low tolerance for women who were flaky or uninteresting.

    I usually had so much going on in my life that I could just get up and leave if she was acting stupid. I’d rather go home and lift weights or go for a bike ride, or read a book. Though I never actually brought a book on a date…

  • The Inlaw Josie Whales

    I guess you could also use a Kindle app on your smartphone and get your reading done there.

    But… nothing could beat pulling out an actual book on a date. Especially with “the art of war” blazoned on the cover

  • Good

    Good stuff, Roosh.

    I tip my hat to you.

  • schwanson

    This is a very good self-sufficiency tip. Great post. Another window into the mindset that’s right for a man to have.

  • J

    Thought this was gonna be about carrying the plan b pill.

    Good stuff though

  • Girl
  • Diego

    “Twice in the past couple of months a girl flaked on a date, I executed the backup plan, and had a one-night stand with another girl.”

    Wait, Polish girls are flakey too?

  • Anon

    1. Plan dates for 8 pm.

    That takes dinner out of the equation. Nothing is usually going on at 8, so you won’t miss out on anything other than your favorite TV show if the date is crappy.

    2. Plan dates close to your place.

    Because the venue is nearby, you can wait till 8 pm to head out. That way, if she sends a cancellation text, it will be well before you’re enroute to the venue. If all goes well, you can easily move her back to your place.

    If things don’t go well, you can easily go back home, take a nap, and head out again.

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com The G Manifesto

    “1. Plan dates for 8 pm.

    That takes dinner out of the equation.”

    Depends on where you are at.

    I am in Spain right now, its almost 10pm and I haven’t even showered yet to get ready to go out to dinner.

    - MPM

  • David

    Or you could not make strategies and just don`t give a shit if someone cancels. Sounds like you`re afraid to get disappointed imo. And Im saying that as a fan of this page and alot of your articles.

  • http://taoofdirt.wordpress.com Dirt Man

    “The sad fact is that no matter how tight your game is, how many dozens of girls you’ve fucked, or how hard your two-week Brazilian girlfriend used to suck your cock, Western women who are lower quality than what you’ve had before will try to treat you like crap.”

    Sums up well the differences between Brazilian women and the Western Variety. I’ve dated two Brazilians that lived here in the U.S. They had the best of everything, I must say.

    If I’m going to text a girl about getting together, I usually text at least 2 girls. Having a backup plan is always good, good advice there. Personally, I’m also always happy to just do my own thing if nothing pans out with meeting up with them. Reading, writing, playing my guitar, meeting a friend, these are all worthy uses of my time if the girl(s) flake out.

    Good, practical advice Roosh.

  • OGNorCal707

    “Can’t lose like Parker Lewis.”

    - MPM

    Haha, that’s hilarious, gotta love obscure 90′s references.

    But for real, this has been another one of many great posts, that you’ve dropped lately. Basically it’s inner game 101. Like Johnny Milfquest wrote, it’s all about outcome independence, abundance mentality, etc.

    I find that once you get to the point where you don’t give a fuck if a chick flakes and it doesn’t bother you, is when you’re in a good place. It’s basically their loss, you’ve given them an opportunity to get to know you, and that’s all you can do. Never take it personally, get down, feel rejected, and punish yourself.

  • Castor Troy

    This is some good stuff. G; I usually schedule dates for 8 too because it takes dinner out of the equation but I have always had another reason for doing it. I generally prefer starting dates later (like 9 PM) but always schedule for 8. This is because 8 isn’t too early but gives you the upper hand on time. I’ll usually text a girl around 4-4:30 to say I’ll be picking them up at 8. I give them until 6 to respond in the affirmative and if they haven’t by then I just say fuck it and unless she’s offering a threesome with Penelope Cruz, I’m not going. So if she doesn’t answer or flakes I know really early in the evening that it’s not happening and can easily make other plans and I ignore any texts I may get from the flake that night and possibly restart a few days later if I feel like it. When the girl confirms in my time frame I lock it down and send a text around 7 saying “something came up I won’t be able to make it til 9″ and boom, it puts it in my time frame, gives me plenty of time to figure out what to do in case of a flake and gets her hamster spinning wondering what I’m doing to make me have to push it back. I find it works. I like Roosh’s ideas though, very pre-meditated and having a definitive place to go mack other girls planned out ahead is a solid idea I’ll add to my repertoire.

  • Anonymous

    If I’m going on a date at 9, I like going out to that area and hitting up a bar that is near by where I am meeting up. For the hour or so prior to meeting up I like to chat with some other women. It makes me feel like I “only have an hour” to talk to girls…so I feel the heat to approach, and I’m also looking forward to meeting up with who ever I’m going out with. Also, fuck pants.

  • http://oldsystemwillfall.wordpress.com Nestorius

    “But you can control how you deal with women. You control who you ask out on dates. You control who you reward with attention. You control whether to contact her again after sex. You also control how to plan dates so that things will still work out in your favor even if she disappoints you.”

    This sounds like:
    “But you can control how you want to be executed. You control the bullet caliber they will shoot you with. You control the diameter of the pale they will make you sit on. You control the type of poison they will make you swallow.”

    I’m not trying to be offensive or pessimistic, but seriously this is how it all sounded to me.

    Bottom line: in the current system, the female always choses the male. Everything else is registers as rape. So there is 0.1% control in a male’s hand.

  • Anonymous

    No one has mentioned what happens when you get to hit both girls.Look at it this way.have sex with the first one,the second date will be tasting what the first dates pussy tastes like when she blows you.Win,Win.happend to my brother once.

  • Bill Dates

    Western women have fool´s license.

  • Anonymous

    fuck the dating. Just tell the girls to come over. I swear they will just do it. Start the relationship off about sex and only sex and if they are digging you they leave it at that.

  • http://taoofdirt.wordpress.com Dirt Man

    Anonymous(#33), you’re right on that one. I generally meet them only once in public for a drink, and then it’s back to my place. And sometimes I just invite them over and skip going out. If they’re not into it I just move on to the next girl. Just depends on the girl/situation. But I know what you’re talking about. It’s my favorite.

    Having said that, I’m off to meet a girl I work with for a drink..she’s moving soon and has been eye fucking me so should be good to go..

  • Bortimus

    Yeah, actually last time I tried to wash my balls I ended up accidentally punching myself in the balls, so I’m assuming I’m doing it wrong somehow. The problem is that now I’m kind of afraid to try again and my balls are getting really dirty. If there was a professional ball-washing service you could point me to that would also be helpful.

  • http://www.freaksofarabia.com Mo Jahama

    thats funny I always take a book and notebook with me everywhere in case i get bored, great article

  • Jay Gatsby

    I like the book idea. If she’s boring you on your “date,” just whip our your book and start reading. When she gets annoyed that you’re not paying attention to her, just give her a quick look over the top of your book with the unspoken message “you’re boring me – I find my book more interesting than you, even though you’re right in front of me.” Yes, this is rude, but so is she. She’s wasting your valuable time, and in many cases knows exactly what she’s doing.

    A variant of the “book” game is often seen in business meetings with a boss or management higher-up. When an employee’s powerpoint presentation is boring, the boss will simply whip out his Blackberry and start going through e-mails. The employee had better do something – QUICK – to regain the attention of his boss, or he risks being relegated to the category of time-waster. I’ve seen this too many times to count, and was even on the receiving end early in my career until I learned to recognize the signs.

    Adopt the “boss” attitude with her. She has to keep you amused or interested, not the other way around.

  • Pingback: Plan B « Citizen Renegade

  • Anonymous

    dude this no dating is awesome. I had a girl call me saying she wanted to go out to dinner. I said I had nothing but shorts and t-shirt. she hymmed and hawwed and then said shewould come over. She then asked if I had beer and said that she was hungry – what was I gonna feed her? I told her I had no food or beer and joked about feeding her my dick. Well sir…she came over with food and beer and banged me.

  • http://bogspua.wordpress.com/ Bog

    As always, good read.

    Love you idea with the book on a date, going for sure take it to my arsenal :-)

  • http://xsplat.wordpress.com xsplat

    Roissy’s site has been taken down. “The authors have deleted this blog.”

    Any inside scoop, Roosh?

  • Anonymous

    what happened to roissy???? did the blog move or is it done?

  • cupojohan

    Roosh-
    “Is further instruction needed? In my next post I can describe how to put on a condom, wash your balls, or make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Let me know”

    A post on pbj sandys might be a nice change of pace.

  • KniteTakesQueen

    Good stuff. I’ll put this into practice during my next round of girls.

  • Marmot

    Roosh, do you know what happened to Roissy? When I try to reach his blog today, it says that “blog was deleted by the owner”! :(

  • STG

    I came to the last Roosh thread because I knew we’d be discussing why Roissy was down

  • http://taoofdirt.wordpress.com Dirt Man

    The last comment I saw on Roissy’s most recent post quoted something about his ‘alpha trivia game’ or something and that roissy’s blog had jumped the shark. maybe he decided to pull the plug after that. maybe just a glitch though.

    And #39 Anonymous, excellent work Sir. That sounds pretty much perfect to me.

  • Roosh

    It’s possible he was hacked and is working on getting his account back.

  • TrailTyme

    The very last comment on his plan b post was:

    “You should consider changing your password”

    Hope he doesn’t lose content.

  • Strauss

    I will start saving some pages from Google Cache just in case, if somebody can do the same it would be great.

  • Anonymous

    We are at the point in time where its not about courting some chick thru town on a white horse or buggy ride thru central park(or any other Romantic scene that comes to mind from the old days or movies)its pretty much getting back to our primal state of things.We might just be walking around naked like cavemen and just bone a chick off the street and keep moving.No wait..I dont want to see Fatty American women naked, never mind…just get to the point when it come to sex with women,women will love you for it even more.

  • http://taoofdirt.wordpress.com Dirt Man

    http://en.support.wordpress.com/delete-site/

    This is grim. If someone did hack his site and his email account, it looks like all his old content is toast. Hard to believe that wordpress.com wouldn’t have a backup solution for cases where someone gets hacked. Ugh.

  • Adam

    I scraped the entire website about a month ago…if Roissy needs it.

  • Strauss

    Definitely an emergency state. I suppose the only hope is to save the google cache pages or hope that Roissy had a backup, i will start saving the pages, do the same.

  • Maximus

    @Adam

    Can you upload to megaupload or rapidshare?

  • Adam

    No, I will not upload to megaupload or rapidshare without Roissy’s approval. It’s his content, and wouldn’t not feel comfortable giving it away. He has the right to monetize it in whatever fashion works for him (wordpress, a book, etc.).

  • Main Concept

    Roissy wasn’t hacked. He just changed the URL. All content is now on:

    http://heartiste.wordpress.com/

  • Anonymous

    Did Roissy delete his blog??

  • Anon

    What happened to Roissys blog? was he hacked? Did he become Amish? Am I gay? Did the world end?

  • http://bogspua.wordpress.com/ Bogs

    I hope he has a backup…

    That was one of few blogs that i check daily.

  • Servo

    Genius! I need to put that in my playbook and laminate it.

  • http://zarzuelazen.com/wordpress/ zarzuelazen

    A ‘hustler’s principle’ of sufficient importance and generality, I’ve made it one of my ‘Hackers Maxims’. Well done. For the list of ‘Hackers Maxims’ visit:

    http://zarzuelazen.com/wordpress/?page_id=29

  • watermellon man
  • watermellon man
  • gig

    What happened to Roissy’s blog? Deleted?

  • brightstormyday

    Having a plan B is pretty necessary, since girls usually always go into a weekend with more than one option. A cancellation might be valid, or it might be that something better came up.

    Maybe it would be better to think of the girl as your Plan B. If she’s thinking of you as an option she could easily cancel, then why not do the same?

    In a way game advocates a lot of principles that girls use, and are recommended to use. Before a guy commits, keep your options open, don’t be too easy for him and give it all up too soon, etc. So naturally a girl’s going to have a Plan A, B, C, d, etc. that can change quickly.

    A guy has to do the same.

  • Pingback: Plan B | The Crotch Shot Radio Show

  • drunicusrex

    Smaller paperbacks or Kindles or Kindle smartphone applications work; I sometimes bring a notebook in addition to a book or two & my smartphone.
    If she’s really bad, my smartphone has an mp3 player, so headphones help also.
    About 5 years ago, I invested in a Barbour waxed cotton jacket, and wore it while getting laid repeatedly.
    It has a large “game” pocket in the back where you can easily store a book without looking like an idiot, as well as a security pocket you can zip a smartphone into.
    They are a bit expensive but are also manly looking, and are good for peacocking because not a lot of people wear them. Plus they’re warm, they vent well, and are waterproof.

  • http://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com/ Socialkenny

    Good post on handling flakes.For 2011,nine out of my 10 # closes resulted into flakes.This post give me a new grip on how to manage flakes.

  • Pingback: Do Girls Flake Because Your Value Is Too Low?