American Girls vs. Ukrainian Girls

American girl: “What do you do?”
Ukrainian girl: “Why are you in Ukraine?”

American: Asks you to buy a drink
Ukrainian: Expects you to buy a drink

American: Flip flops because they’re comfortable
Ukrainian: High heels because men like them

American: 20 pounds overweight
Ukrainian: 5 pounds underweight

American: Looking for a stable career
Ukrainian: Looking for a stable husband

American: Won’t shut up
Ukrainian: Won’t open up

American: Hates makeup
Ukrainian: Qualified to be a makeup artist

American: Fake attitude
Ukrainian: Fake nails, eyelashes, and sometimes eyebrows

American: Obsessed with celebrities
Ukrainian: Obsessed with money

American: Bang in three hours
Ukrainian: Bang in three dates

American: Knows how to heat chicken nuggets
Ukrainian: Knows how to cook meals passed on from her grandmother

American: Has bulky dimensions like an Australian rugby player
Ukrainian: Has petite dimensions like a normal girl

American: You have to trick her into having sex
Ukrainian: You have to logically convince her into having sex

American: High self-esteem when beauty doesn’t warrant it
Ukrainian: Low self-esteem when beauty warrants it

American: Pretends to be a porn star in bed
Ukrainian: Pretends to be a virgin in bed

American: Complains there are no good men
Ukrainian: Complains you didn’t buy her flowers

American: Grinds on every cock in the club
Ukrainian: Does not grind

American: Feels uncomfortable with silence
Ukrainian: Feels uncomfortable with too much chatter

American: Treats you like a coworker
Ukrainian: Treats you like the master of her life

American: Relationship gets worse after first bang
Ukrainian: Relationship gets better after first bang

American: Never traveled but thinks she knows the world
Ukrainian: Never traveled and insecure about it

American: Obsessed with Apple
Ukrainian: Obsessed with Apple

American: I’m not getting laid tonight so neither will my friends, and neither will that guy over there
Ukrainian: I’m not getting laid tonight

American: Goes to supermarket in pajamas
Ukrainian: Goes to supermarket in mini skirt

American: Brags about banging a black guy as proof she isn’t racist
Ukrainian: Does not tell anyone she banged a black guy

American: Dresses like a bum even though she has money
Ukrainian: Dresses flashy even though she has no money

American: Sees men as misogynists who have institutional privilege
Ukrainian: Sees men as a bridge to a better life

American: Will believe anything you tell them
Ukrainian: Human lie detector

American: Pretend she’s strong and independent
Ukrainian: Knows she’s fragile and weak

American: Brags about dating multiple guys at the same time
Ukrainian: Brags about gifts that rich men bought her

American: Thinks lawyer are boring
Ukrainian: Thinks lawyers are accomplished men worthy of marriage

American: Goes out twice a week to clubs to get attention from men
Ukrainian: Goes out only once a month because she can’t afford it

American: Thinks casual sex and free birth control are essential to being happy
Ukrainian: Things marriage is essential to being happy

American: Fucks a guy who can make her vagina wet
Ukrainian: Fucks a guy who can improve her life in some way

American: Expert at taking webcam shots from magic angles
Ukrainian: Expert at posing sexy for photos in ugly park

American: Ideal man has to be witty, spontaneous, and interesting, with stand-up comedian level of humor
Ukrainian: Doesn’t care about a man’s personality as long as he has money

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