Category Archives: A Dead Bat In Paraguay

The Epilogue Of The Epilogue

A common question from last week’s release of Dead Bat’s epilogue was, “What kind of game did you use on Mariana?” I describe how we met in the book, but it was just like any other approach. I didn’t do anything special or different. While I did feel a connection with her mighty quick, I […]

A Dead Bat In Paraguay Epilogue (Part 4 of 4)

PREVIOUSLY: PART THREE The crowd at the champagne bar was typical: older professionals who wanted to wind down after work. We sat next to each other at a huge table that ran the length of the bar. I caught her up on my life in Rio. “When I first came here, I fell in love […]

A Dead Bat In Paraguay Epilogue (Part 3 of 4)

PREVIOUSLY: PART TWO “I think we should just be friends,” she said. I’d been dumped many times before, where things simply faded away and a girl stopped agreeing to go out with me. Maybe I would run into her later and we’d have sex again for old time’s sake, but not once in seven years […]

A Dead Bat In Paraguay Epilogue (Part 2 of 4)

PREVIOUSLY: PART ONE Nostalgia is a powerful thing. I had a constant smirk on my face while doing all the simple things I had done before, like getting a folhado at my favorite bakery, recharging my cell phone balance at the mobile shop, doing pull-ups on the beach bars in Ipanema, and eating lunch at […]

A Dead Bat In Paraguay Epilogue (Part 1 of 4)

(Download the PDF file for all four parts by clicking here.) “So how was the Northeast?” Paula asked. “It was just like you said—poor, but with great beaches. I went to Fortaleza, Natal, Pipa, Recife, Salvador, and Vitória. I liked Vitória the most because I swear I was the only gringo there.” “Vitória? Only businessmen […]

A Dead Bat In Paraguay Expanded Edition

I’m happy to annouce the release of the expanded edition to A Dead Bat In Paraguay, a little over one year after the initial release. The two major changes are a new cover and a seventeen page epilogue that describes what happened during my second trip to Rio. A Dead Bat In Paraguay gets murdered […]

I Picked A Cover

I decided to pick the lowest rated cover: I made my decision to please the guy who left the following comment… Can you pull this off? Can you honestly see yourself holding this book up in front of strangers and telling them that you wrote this book? Id snicker at the title. Hell I’m laughing […]

Which Cover Should I Pick?

Entries are in for the cover redesign contest! I want a cover that not only is crowd-pleasing but also builds intrigue. If you’re in a coffee shop and you see someone reading a book with one of these covers, which one would make you want to learn more? Out of over 100 submissions, here are […]

6 Travel Tips For Your Stomach

An excerpt from A Deat Bat In Paraguay: [In Tupiza, Bolivia] I did some research on the internet while waiting a day for my tour to the Southwest to begin. (How I could make it four days without constant access to toilet I wasn’t sure.) I learned that Bolivia is the poorest country in the […]

Rio’s Carnival Is Incredibly Overrated

In A Dead Bat In Paraguay I wrote: While packed in the procession dancing along with my friends, Skol beer in hand, I realized how much worse Carnival would be if I didn’t know anyone. I wouldn’t know which blocos to pick and there would no one to tell me what the Carnival songs meant. […]

Female Wingmen Are Overrated

Here’s an Bang excerpt from page 56: You may want to turn an attractive lady friend into a wingman. The female wingman is supposed to let other females know that you are accepted on this Earth by at least one woman. But we use her differently than a male wingman. While your buddy is by […]

“Always Start In English”

Here’s an excerpt from page 153 of A Dead Bat In Paraguay…. If I’m in a club bathroom with a gringo friend talking in English, there will be at least one native who understands our banter and asks where we’re from. In the Duff bathroom I ended up meeting a Chilean who studied in Los […]

Four Places To Practice Your Spanish In Medellin

I recently wrote a tongue-in-cheek guest post for Medellin Living, a blog run by a guy named Dave who I met here in Colombia. Here’s an excerpt: 3. There’s casas and there’s casas. I’m talking about the places where older gentleman callers visit for 30 or 60 minute intervals. Many gringos I’ve spoken to, especially […]