I note ways my interactions with girls are different when I really get along with them. Sure I touch more, laugh more, and kiss quicker, but there’s something I caught myself doing when the chemistry was especially strong: making vague future plans.

For example I’d talk with a girl for a while, she’d tell me she likes sushi, and then I’d say, “Oh I know this great sushi place that has so and so. We should go there one day.”

Later we’re talking about clubs and how she loves house music. Then I’d say, “Have you been to so and so club? On Friday nights their music is incredible, maybe we should check it out.”

I didn’t do this as a “move”—it was just a natural way to share future fun experiences with someone who has similar interests. But then I got to thinking about how to explicitly use this as a move to shortcut the rapport process, and started doing it on purpose. The result is what you’d expect: it creates a feeling that we’ve known each other a lot longer than we really have.

In the course of conversation she’s going to hopefully mention an interest that you share. Then all you have to do is identify a place that has that interest and say, “We should go there.” Don’t set a date, don’t name specifics, just plant the seed in her brain and then change the subject.

If she mentions a love of flowers and you happen to love flowers as well for some reason, say, “Have you been to the Botanical Gardens—they have something like 500 species of flowers. We should go there.”

If she mentions an interest in rock music and you know a free festival coming up, tell her about it and say, “We should go there.”

If she mentions an interest in coffee, and you know an Italian espresso bar then mention it and say, “We should go there.”

As long as she keeps mentioning interests, keep mentioning places you should go to, though if you’re nervous about overdoing it keep a cap at three spots until you get experience and can better feel out the move.

Again, the point here is not to actually get a date (though that may very occur), but to strengthen the rapport and get her mind thinking about spending time with you in the future. You won’t be able to objectively measure the effectiveness of this move, but I’m sure after doing it you’ll feel the connection strengthen.

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