Compliment & Cuddle: The Beta Male Method To Getting Laid

If you’re wondering why I’ve gone soft since last year, it’s because I’ve been developing a kinder, gentler game guide that is less evil and more sustainable to humanity than Bang. I’m happy to announce this new guide is finally ready to be released for free. Click here to start reading or download it all in one PDF file. You can also order the paperback on Amazon.

Here are some things you’ll read about…

  • The exact moment I realized that game was destroying me and my readers
  • Six deprogramming steps that every former gamesman must perform to becoming sensitive and caring once again
  • Why experiencing a woman’s “two minutes of hate” will put you on a path towards true redemption
  • The absurdity of evolutionary justifications to explaining modern sexual selection
  • The real reason why women don’t want a confident man who beats to his own drum

The guide also shows you how to better connect with women. It contains…

  • Six powerful beliefs that help you put the pussy on the pedestal
  • A breakdown on the three most appropriate places to meet women: church, work, and social circle
  • An easy technique to have a conversation with her so that she feels like a celebrity
  • Four strategies to maintain the proper groveling vibe in long conversations
  • The top nine compliments you should use on women to make her feel unique and special

It then has a step-by-step guide to taking your friendship to the next level, including…

  • How to prepare written notes before calling a girl for the first time
  • Real-world examples of how to insert exclamation points and smiley faces in every text message you send
  • Four additional strategies for advanced groveling on a “shared function outing” to ensure she stays happy at your expense
  • Tips to weaving family and work topics into every conversation
  • My favorite way to imply how your hypothetical “dream girl” can easily squeeze mother out of the picture
  • The importance of letting her know that you earn money from a real job

Finally, the guide teaches you how to go from platonic friendship to real intimacy. It describes…

  • How to smoothly pay for her dinner at a trendy restaurant without even looking at the receipt
  • A recipe for initiating the cuddling protocol while she’s sound asleep
  • My foolproof tactic for not getting a boner in her presence
  • How to execute the “Caribbean Vacation Move” when it comes time to seal the deal
  • The easiest way to ensure you’re not actually raping her

By releasing Compliment & Cuddle for free, I hope that its ideas will be disseminated far and wide, erasing the damage I’ve done with Bang, a stupid book that has taught men to go for sex as fast as possible without any consideration of what it does to the female or her vagina. I’m sure many of you are in disbelief that I’ve reversed courses, but I hope the solid advice I present in the guide will convince you that C&C game is actually the most optimal way to intimately connect with the modern woman. Start reading now…

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  • Steve Lurkel

    April Fools! Hahahahaha! Good one, Roosh!

  • Pete M

    Uh uh. This isn’t an April Fools – I spoke to Roosh he’s had a life changing experience in Denmark and he’s doing a complete 360. I don’t wanna spoil the surprise but there might be a “sound of bells” announcement on Monday when the new guide is released.

  • LOL

    LOL, indeed. Good one, Roosh.

  • Anonymous

    roflmao Forgot what day it was for a second

  • http://josephsblog.typepad.com/shorts Joseph Dantes

    Glad to see you’re finally displaying some maturity.

    Incidentally, I’ve just written a very controversial post on the benefits of ingesting your own semen.

    http://josephsblog.typepad.com/shorts/2011/04/drink-your-own-semen-to-improve-your-mood-and-reduce-social-anxiety.html

  • Andrei Seeds

    I bet you could earn a lot of money by publishing something like this. Just look at the dating/advice/slut columns.

  • http://www.theunambitiousmale.com/ Workshy Joe

    You stole my idea, you evil fuck!

  • Anonymous

    Good, Roosh.

    I am pleased to hear that you have repented of your evil playboy ways and now appreciate women for who they are as individuals.

    We are most pleased.

  • Anonymous

    …..APRIL fOOLS!

  • Kievy

    hahahahahahhaah priceless

  • http://www.theunambitiousmale.com/ Workshy Joe

    @Andrei Seeds: Michael Marks is already on it.

  • Kievy

    @ Pete M A 360? that would bring a person back to where they were…go back to math class

  • Anonymous

    April fools to all!!This is a book on “HOW TO FAIL WITH WOMEN!!”

  • John Gray

    Women are such rose petals. They do not even poop and are made of unicorn blood. You must respect them as a gender and follow your heart and tell them how you feel.

  • Olivherbst

    I´m absolutely looking forward to this. You should consider a paypal-donate button for all the guys and especially girls thanking you for this eye-opening bible of a book.

    I love 1st April.

  • http://artofclueless.wordpress.com Remy Gibson

    Five minutes of beta makes up for a lifetime of alpha.

  • http://www.southernmanblog.com Southern Man

    The sad part is that this was my life for twenty years.

  • Mackroyal44

    This one is better than the time you said you fucked a sheep. Good one, I knew Denmark was gettin to you

  • MattW

    This is a game changer. I am gonna download this book and memorize it. I’m gonna download it twice!
    Thank you Roosh, thank you so much!

  • Pete M

    @Kievy – good spot you’re right.

  • Adventure21c

    Even as an April Fool’s, this is too painful.

    “How to smoothly pay for her dinner at a trendy restaurant without even looking at the receipt”

    Damn…

  • Marmot

    I love your April Fool’s this year… the sheep adventure was great but gross, this is just perfect though.

  • Adventure21c

    Hmmm, have I turned gay?

    I actually like the new theme/layout for the forum.

    Can you keep it that way?

  • Adventure21c

    Nah, actually, seeing that layout everyday would make me want to vomit.

  • http://collegeslacker.wordpress.com collegeslacker

    Too funny. Touche, Roosh.

  • http://www.hokieblogger.com Gmac

    The greatest lesson I ever learned was after a woman slapped me in the face for looking down her shirt at the grocery store. Never again will I degrade and devalue women.

  • Lumiere

    This is not an April fools. Me and Roosh have been talking extensively on email about some paradigm shifting ideas when it comes to game.

    This is the first fruits of the paradigm shift although I can not take credit for it.

    I am currently working on my book ‘how to treat her like the rose petal that she is’ which I expect will be a massive success.

  • Lika

    That’s how you got to fuck a sheep in Denmark?

  • tjuan

    Ha!!!

  • gringoed

    I’m not going to wait until Monday. This shit is so gold that I’m going to spit this at all my current fuck buddies and prospects this weekend. What’s April Fools?

  • Anonymous

    Good one Roosh. An alternative title to the ‘guide’ referenced above might be ‘Making Peace With Your Inner Douche”

  • http://singlewm.blogspot.com/ Chad Daring

    You know, I wont like, I had forgotten what today is and I was reading this thinking “fuck this all kinds of ways”

    “My foolproof tactic for not getting a boner in her presence”

    Tuck it in the waistband?!

    On a related topic “tuck it in the waistband” would make a great marketing pitch for the Hanes “comfort soft” waistband.

  • http://www.ifsmassive.blogspot.com flamethrower

    april fools suprise buttsex!

    for a more novel approach to gaming see my Flavor Game post http://www.ifsmassive.blogspot.com i would love any and all reactions

  • http://www.jgsbws.com Terry Smith

    Brilliant – you’re a genius – you had me going until I remembered the date.

  • http://wonkawilly.wordpress.com Willy Wonka

    A much better April Fool’s joke than the “I missed my period” text I got this morning….

  • http://singlewm.blogspot.com/ Chad Daring

    @Willy Wonka

    Thats when you act super pissed when she says April Fools, get almost belligerent and see what happens. She gets apologetic and wants to make it up to you, then take whatever you please from her. She gets pissed in return because its “Just a joke” then YOU say April fools.

    Win Win

  • http://www.theunambitiousmale.com/ Workshy Joe

    Roosh,

    Sorry I got angry back there dude. Thank you for the advance hardback copy you sent me via courier.
    I really appreciate that.

    As you can see, I’m doing my best to promote the book on my blog.

    Those teddybears on the dust jacket are so freaking adorable I can’t stand it.

    The advice in there is right on the money. Buying my girl expensive gifts, paying her compliments, miming “I wuv you” across a crowded room, white-knighting and being really asexual is working out great.

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  • chi-town

    I love April fools. Even though its another lonely night in my basement, trying to decide whether I am going to masturbate to the JCP catalog or the less stimulating but newer one from Walmart, someone told me that there is a hilarious April fools joke on Roosh. Sure enough there is this ridiculous faux book called “Bang”.

  • Phoenix

    Haha. Real funny asshole!

  • Timothy

    Here’s some support for the new and improved Roosh!

    http://lifestyle.msn.com/relationships/staticslideshowes.aspx?cp-documentid=26215387&GT1=32092

    HILARIOUS! HA HA!

  • http://www.hokieblogger.com Gmac

    @ Timothy

    I just threw up a little in my mouth after reading through that.

  • Timothy

    @Gmac…tell me about it brother. It was so typical of the bullshit that’s fed to men consistently, and everything that you guys here fight against. I thought it was hilarious, and the timing was perfect to post it here.

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  • Francis

    This April fool’s joke is over now. It says he would release the “New Book”, a day after this post, but days have passed and nothing is released so it must be a April fool’s joke. Plus, it is not about it works or not, the words or belief that he uses on this post is completely against most of the words or belief that he has normally. I have to say that is 10000000% that is a joke.

  • Lemon

    Anything I’ve learned in life pales to this. It’s genius.

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  • http://www.fredtracy.com Fred Tracy

    Oh my god. Hahahahahahahaha.

  • LaCobra

    So many many many Centuries of bullshit condensed in just a few pages, i´m gonna read C&C before going out to get me in proper mood.

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  • gay hendricks

    that picture alone made me beta.

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  • Ed

    so you had to wait for ‘days to pass’ to figure that out huh.