Compliment & Cuddle Post-Mortem

I wouldn’t dare insult my readers, whose support I always appreciate, but if it was not obvious to you that Compliment & Cuddle—which I announced on April 1—was a joke, then you’re a moron. Sorry. Unless you have Asperger’s or autism, I just don’t see how it can be taken seriously.

I first came up with the “Compliment & Cuddle” term in this post:

Who knows—if American women rewarded men who worshipped them, the rules of the game would change and maybe my first book would be called Compliment & Cuddle instead of Bang, but they don’t.

Afterwards I thought how it would be amusing if such an actual guide existed. I looked at the calendar and noticed that April Fools was coming up, and since I still didn’t have a good idea, I drew up an outline using Bang as a contrary reference and then got to work. The plan was to make you think the announcement was an obvious gag, when the real gag was that I actually wrote the shit out. I like to consider it a reverse April Fools joke.

It’s ironic that this beta layguide is the most compelling reason I’ve ever presented as to why game is so important. If there’s a set of behaviors and beliefs which obviously decrease a man’s sexual opportunities, like C&C game, then variables must exist to affect a man’s ability to get laid. Therefore, using the power of logic, even the most self-deluded beta or feminist is forced to conclude that there has to be a game which maximizes a man’s chances of scoring. Detailing the worst game possible is evidence that another game must work better.

The second reason for this guide is that I wanted to drill into your brain the whole scope of beta acts that you should avoid. If you’re about to do something that you remembered reading in Compliment & Cuddle, you’ll now jerk away from that behavior like a vampire reacting to sunlight. You have been successfully programmed for acting more alpha.

Lastly, I wanted to show how being nice can actually be more manipulative than the tactics I teach. All those nice guys act that way primarily because they think it’s the best way to get what they want in return (love or intimacy). Guys like us who use game are ultimately more honest because we are more direct about our sexual needs. It’s no surprise that reason contributes to why women will respect an alpha much more than a beta who is being subversive about the “friendship” he is cultivating. Ironically, she trusts the shady alpha more than the loyal beta.

The C&C man I describe is what feminists describe they want—a cautious, supportive men who respects their sexuality, but one they rarely settle for unless no alpha wants them. A female’s words of what she wants in a man will never match the guys she ends up fucking. Like I’ve already said countless times, never listen to what a woman says, especially when it comes to what she wants. Just look at the results instead, like the “asshole” she ended up dating for two years and still can’t stop talking about.

I noticed there were a lot of “that used to be me” comments. As a recovering beta, writing C&C wasn’t that hard—I just had to remember my high school and college days and let the words flow. I don’t want to get all mushy, but with this series I felt more of a sense of brotherhood with my readers than anything else I’ve written. We’re all in the same boat—guys who sucked with women and now piece by piece are gaining knowledge and skills to get what we want from them. Though we’re from different races, ages, and nationalities, we’re all moving along the same path. Thankfully the techniques and mindset to achieve our goals, which range from one-night stands to long-term relationships, and nearly identical.

The sad part about Compliment & Cuddle, which you can now download as a PDF file, is that it’s maybe not soft enough for what a lot of guys actually do. I’m talking about guys who literally worship women like these fools:

Tight game can’t exist unless there is a large population of men who don’t have game, so let’s thank all the cuddlers for keeping our tactics effective.

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  • outlaw josey wales

    I skimmed some stories about this video, but watching more than 5 seconds literally made me sick and my mind revolt.

  • Ubermind

    “Tight game can’t exist unless there is a large population of men who don’t have game, so let’s thank all the cuddlers for keeping our tactics effective. ”

    I have been thinking about this a long time. While clueless betas all around allow the few alfas to swim in pool of women like Scrooge McDuck in money pool, they can also be antagonists to a game guy – cockblockers, they can be like those people plugged in matrix – ready to turn into an agent and to fight on behalf of the system against their own and their fellow man’s good. Often this is an unpleasant nuisance or just makes me sad.

    Roosh, could you ever write a guide or at least share some ideas on how to convert a fellow man to game? A friend? A brother? Your own father? Even with all the women around, one can feel himself lonely if one must hide his wievs, fearing from betrayal even from other men?

    For me gaming women makes no big difficulties any more. It is speaking to men about these subjects that is much more difficult usually. They usually conclude I am to cynical and and arrogant. Calling me a mad bohemian philosopher. Any help on this topic would be appreciated.

  • http://www.atlibertyatleisure@wordpress.com Nicky G

    I thought that’s where you were going with all of this. That’s why it was drawn out instead of just an April Fool’s joke.

  • Snoeperd

    Salutations! awesome article

    Btw i was diagnosed with asperger’s as a kid but i still recognized the sarcasm.

  • http://www.theunambitiousmale.com/ Workshy Joe

    C & C is the perfect companion volume to Bang.

    C & C shows you what to avoid. Bang shows you what to do.

    By the way, there’s a reason why women give the wrong answer to questions about attractiveness:

    http://www.theunambitiousmale.com/2011/02/what-can-you-see-on-other-side-of.html

  • SAC

    this post-mortem should be a part of the pdf file as an epilogue or something….

  • SAC

    also i think some of the people in that video have to have been paid to feature in it…like the stoned out dude at 1:25…

  • Black Rebel

    How much of that video could you guys get through? I lasted 44 seconds.

    ‘The destructive efforts of the unconscious masculine’? Come on…I have no issue if you’re going to pedestalize and be a weak bitch (more women for me), but don’t say the so-called ‘unconscious masculine’ has been ‘destructive’ when its been responsible for just about everything we require and enjoy today.

  • Carl Sagan

    I had to skim through that video. Just a few seconds at a time.

    sickening

  • http://aaronsholymountain.wordpress.com Aaron

    yes, that used to be me too. in high-school i was a major narcissist and thus did very well with women. then in unversity i was introduced to feminism and bought it. my success with women completely stopped to nearly nothing for like two years, i was very frustrated, even convincing myself at one point i was “asexual,” then i discovered game and i’m good again.

    the saving grace was that through university i did biological-anthro so always had a foot in the biology world which allowed me to be receptive to game. also, i completely understood the right state of mind to be in when interacting with women since i was in that state of mind through high school.

  • http://aaronsholymountain.wordpress.com Aaron

    “if it’s all that much effort then i consider not having women in my life a bargain.” – i bet many of you can relate to that sentiment!

  • Castor Troy

    This video is either some sort of post realist prank that just flies over my head or the most sickening thing I have ever seen.

  • Tim

    Most people who read PUA stuff have Asperger’s/are autistic, so ironically a lot of people probably thought you were serious.

  • Roosh

    “Most people who read PUA stuff have Asperger’s/are autistic”

    link?

  • Brian

    What is manipulative is a society that has and is socially conditioning kids to become beta through programing them to ask for permission before doing anything, sacrifice ones own desires, please others at the expense of yourself only to have them not appreciate it anyway, do things for approval or to avoid disapproval, and to be quiet and do what you are told instead of doing what you really want to do.
    Therefore, genuine game is reclaiming your true nature as a masculine man and having the freedom to live your own life as you desire to.

  • http://www.ifsmassive.blogspot.com flamethrower

    @ tim @ roosh

    actually i think if anything the aspergers/autism comment/sentiment is nothing more than ad hominem on the part of feminist psychologists.

    a few years ago when i was living with my mom and she said she wanted to go to a joint counseling session with me. she said i was too angry, domineering, verbally violent with others etc (read: too alpha). she read some article that said that men that act like this probably have autism/aspergers and decided we needed to see a psychologist together. the shrink (a woman) agreed with my mom.

    stupid ass women are treating our normal behavior as a pathology. tim, you have it backwards. this is slander feminists use against men they can’t control.

  • http://www.ifsmassive.blogspot.com flamethrower

    the number of young boys diagnosed with aspergers/autism is also on the rise. many of these little dudes have never heard of game. they just want to be normal little boys but feminism is crushing their burgeoning masculine spirit.

  • Anonymous

    Im not trying to plug this dude, but has anyone ever heard of this PUA.
    I think he makes some good points on beta guys.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ui2dvnhYIjo&feature=relmfu

  • Tim

    It was just a generalization. A lot of people with Asperger’s/Autism are lonely, so they come to sites like this thinking it will help them. Sort of like the guy who wears Abercrombie polos thinking they will automatically attract girls. There was big exchange about Aspies and pickup on Roissy’s blog a couple of months ago…

  • Tim

    ^^of course they do help, but they aren’t the only solution I think!

  • sanjay

    video made me feel physically sick

  • Anonymous

    Thank You My Dear Friend Roosh

    … for All

    But for this post ESPECIALLY!

    All the Best

  • http://www.fretdancer.wordpress.com Bugs

    “Detailing the worst game possible is evidence that another game must work better.”

    Indeed, the only proof I needed when I began learning game.

    “Tight game can’t exist unless there is a large population of men who don’t have game, so let’s thank all the cuddlers for keeping our tactics effective. ”

    Sad but true. I wonder how many of those never really get to learn and they live their whole lives C&Cing.

  • demont

    I’m a fairly new reader here but as soon as I got to the end of the first chapter, I knew it was fake. At first I thought Roosh was going too extreme. Sure, guys do “game” (if you can call this that) like this, but not at this high of a level of betaness. Then I realized that this is what I would do. Even back a year ago, I would have laughed at this guide, but essentially do everything in it. It really is scary once you realize that other guys (and possibly you in the past) use or have used this stuff.

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  • Dopilsya

    @BUGS

    ” I wonder how many of those never really get to learn and they live their whole lives C&Cing.”

    Fuck em!! You can lead the horse to water but you can’t force it to drink. Whenever i attempt to enlighten my beta co-horts regarding their issue(s), they automatically respond by implementing conditioned shame language.

  • Anonymous

    “I honor your capacity to listen your body and its needs, for food, rest, and playtime”.

    Wow.

  • Adventure21c

    Good. Let’s put this to rest now.

  • http://thegoldenageofvanity.wordpress.com/ Jevioso

    If Game was the equivalent of Jesus, in terms of salvation; Compliment and Cuddle must be the Anti-Christ.

  • http://singlewm.blogspot.com/ Chad Daring

    By far the best point you’ve made is how Beta behaviour is RIDICULOUSLY manipulative. I remember story specifically.

    A house party was being thrown my my roommates. Everyone was having fun, blah blah blah. There was a turtle there who had fucked pretty much everyone but me, and guess who she “liked” the most?

    Well some bottom feeder she was talking too “seriously” had basically called her a slut via text and she was belligerent.

    I sat on our back patio, just us, for almost 2 hours consoling her. Told her it would be okay, blah blah. She literally cried on my shoulder. The night ended, she went home, I didnt even get a pity kiss. Two days later she fucked my roommate.

    The entire time I sat there listening to her I remember thinking “okay she’s really upset, maybe now she’ll see you’re a good guy and she’ll let you have sex with her”

    I didnt give a shit about her. I bashed her when she wasnt there. I criticized all the shitty choices she made blatantly, but I sat there consoling her in the hopes that she would have sex with me.

    It was a failure, doesnt make it any less devious.

  • gringoed

    “when the real gag was that I actually wrote the shit out.”

    Well played sir.

  • Princeton

    Wow. LMFAO re: that video. (As an aside, though – I know a guy who uses that bullshit to perfection. He is an “energy healer” who gets laid like a pro spouting that shit. If you do go that route make sure you work out and you’re very alpha. I could see it working for only one dude in that video – the guy in the white shirt with the blue background.)

    Anyway, Roosh’s point is proven by women’s own reactions to the video. That “feminist” cesspool Jezebel’s headline reads, “Creepy Guys Make Apology to Women…” So even FEMINISTS who purport to embrace these guys’ rhetoric (who INVENTED the rhetoric) don’t respect these toolbags. Amazing.

    See this woman’s rant about “nice guys:”

    http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/niceguys.shtml

  • http://aaronsholymountain.wordpress.com Aaron

    Chad Daring –

    i can relate to that. i know first hand that betadom is game strategy – just a really shitty one, as i found out.

  • Lumiere

    Waaaaaaaaaaait

    This was a joke the whole time ?!

    Goddamit Roosh I thought we were on the verge of a genuine breakthrough and the birth of a new mens movement here!

  • playersclub11307

    This is one of the best posts I read, and I think roosh needs to add this to the end of the C&C guide. It shows that a woman doesnt want a beta man, but she wants somebody that knows what hes doing. I have done a lot of the same stuff in that guide, and it just doesnt work. For as many women that complain about Roosh and think hes a nasty pig, he really does know his stuff, and thats why I remain a loyal fan. Thanks roosh for opening our eyes to our past behavior and failure with women.

  • Pro

    why does all this hate against guys with aspergers in game blogs?

    I don’t know if i am one of them or just extreme introvert, but i sympathize with them and seriously is not like they are retarded or sub-human, some of them are very gifted indeed, just not socially savvy. Many are ultimately trying to overcome this difficulty, so at least they are doing something about it.

  • http://twitter.com/benmarvin Ben Marvin

    The sad part is that most guys tend to do all the things in C&C almost verbatim, because that’s what they think women want.

    The better part is that C&C can actually be used as a reverse manual for things not to do. A handy reference to “every mistake in the book”.

  • Carthy McCormac

    White guilt is very deceptively destructive… Without a sexually and economically functioning American middle class what chance does the world stand?

  • Bortimus

    I think what we all need is less Asperger’s and more furburgers.

  • Anonymous

    When are you going to write a guide for women?

  • http://www.ifsmassive.blogspot.com flamethrower

    i think the problem with the aspergers label is shrinks are trying to say that it is a ‘spectrum’ you could have a little or a lot of aspergers. i think thats probably bullshit. just like consent is a spectrum

  • tony clifton

    You mean all these notes I’ve been taking on C+C the last couple weeks have been for nothing? Can I at least use this stuff on that one special girl?

  • Adventure21c

    I just received Roosh’s newsletter email titled “Compliment & Cuddle game…”.

    Hearing that name “Compliment & Cuddle” alone makes me sick to my stomach now.

  • Mister X

    About that movie. Those people took a perfectly good concept, the ”feminine energy”, and mutilated it by trying to associate it with that so-called apology towards women on behalf of all the masculine gender and all that. However ‘embracing feminine energy’ is NOT the same as ‘worshipping women’. The feminine energy itself is the side of the human being which, employed by a seduction artist, can make him godlike. It is associated with creativity, kindness, diplomacy and many more. A fine balance between masculine and feminine energy can make a man make a woman worship him. I still pity those guys though.

  • Mig mack

    @40

    Guide for women:
    1-Be thin
    2-Say hi to guy
    3-There is no step 3

  • ThisAsshole

    Even if you’re trying to win back a girl you cheated on, asshole game still works better than C&C game. You have to give a tiny bit of C&C once you have her back, otherwise she’ll think you’re fucking another chick every time you’re not in her sight, but even then it’s 1% C&C and 99% standard game.

  • Snoeperd

    Btw i never believed that learning a bit of game could be a blue-pill revelation but i reconsidered; i recognized pussy-beggar behavior in a lot of my acquaintances now. It’s annoying.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4mE7hkEucZY

  • http://singlewm.blogspot.com/ Chad Daring

    @47
    My new favorite game to kill time at work is “spot the Beta” Its fun, but kinda hurts when I realize they’re doing shit I was doing just a few months ago

  • Anonymous

    Agreed, ever since I started learning game, I’ve been spotting so much beta behavior in all my friends.

  • StrikeForceMorituri

    Roosh,

    I found Compliment and Cuddle to be in my opinion your best guide as I have done every single one of the things in the past before i learned some game and wondered why I never was the guy who got the girl. I read it downloaded the pdf to my kindle and then printed it to show my clueless friend that what he was doing was really more manipulative than what jerks (like myself) out there do to bed women. He’s slowly coming around but there’s a lot of work to do.

    I lasted about 16 seconds before I almost kicked my foot through the screen.

  • LaCobra

    Dear woman, go make me a sandwich.

  • tjuan

    If you avoid C&C game then you’re well on the right path. Thanks for the PDF, it’s a good laugh; while it’s clearly satire, I believe it’s a required reference.

  • Timothy

    @45 Mig mack…there’s a skit on NWA’s “Niggaz 4 Life” that’s titled “How to Suck a Dick.” This should be required listening for women. THAT can be #3!

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  • Anonymous

    This post reminds of Ross Jefferies. What’s the deal with him making a compliment whenever you walk past a woman? It’s totally gay. “Ohhhh I like your shoes. Where’d you get them?” or “You have excellent posture”. He was the first guy I ever saw talk about pick up seriously but it was some serious compliment & cuddle material. He actually holds seminars, I just don’t know what happens to the guys who attend them.

  • Esteban

    Finally, a “Screwtape Letters” for our times. C.S. Lewis is spinning in his grave.

  • madmax

    ah ah, I can’t believe that fucking idiots as in that video, really exist. I was laughing my ass off, it’s unreal