Don’t Shed A Single Tear After Losing A Girl You Banged

There is nothing like the rush you receive after a new sexual conquest. All the work you did before it has paid off with the reward of a woman’s body. It is a glorious success indeed that keeps men such as myself pursuing this dopamine high for much of their adult lives.

Oftentimes, the pussy is so golden, so beautiful, so generous with its lubrication, that you want to hit again. You may even want a relationship with the girl who this pussy is attached to. Unfortunately, you will not always succeed. Maybe the girl only wanted to fuck you once. Maybe she sensed your neediness and disappeared off the face of the earth. Or maybe you made a severe game mistake and turned her off for good. You will find it quite disconcerting to lose a girl so easily even after your penis ravaged her insides, but I promise you that it will happen many times in your life.

The more intimacy you’ve had with a girl, the more sour you will feel when you lose her. You’ll furiously analyze the interaction to see where you went wrong, but in the end, the girl is gone and you are left unsatisfied in spite of the fact that you did have sex with her.

This is the wrong mentality to have.

Instead of feeling like an idiot, you must feel like a victor, because you did have sex with her. How many guys will she have sex with during her prime years between 18-28? Even if she’s a big slut, less than 100. This means that out of 3.5 billion men in the world, you were one of the lucky ones chosen to fornicate with her. There have only been 266 popes since 33 AD—you are essentially one of the sexual popes of her life, a special man who was at the right place at the right time with the right words and the right moves. Even if you didn’t get to hit it as many times as you would’ve liked, do you not see how you came out on top? Do you not appreciate the incredible feat you’ve accomplished?

The goal of most women is to extract as many material resources from men as possible. While this is changing in modern times with women essentially giving it up for free, they still seek status, entertainment, and positive feelings that come from enjoying your appearance, personality, and confidence. As a man, your goal should be to extract as much “sexual resources” from an individual woman as possible. You must structure all your relationships to put in as many penile strokes inside her body until the inevitable end, so that when she gets bored of you or meets a man better than you, you can simply walk it off, look in the mirror, and know that you came out on top even if you may have happened to fuck it up in the end.

There is absolutely no reason for you to ever be upset as long as you lay even one measly stroke of pipe inside her. She may feel better about herself because she rejected you, but her last-minute touchdown is meaningless because you still won the game. Don’t you dare feel down on yourself. Instead, take a well-deserved rest before you go win again.

Read Next: He Who Hesitates, Masturbates

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  • Emmanuel Goldstein

    Have to say I disagree with this post. I’ve had a string of lays with girls I really wanted to see again in the past few months, and almost none would see me again. I was texting with one of these girls weeks after the fuck, and she explained she saw me only as a sexual person and not beyond that, and that she had started seeing someone else.

    Banging new girls is good. But if every time you want to get your dick wet you have to get a new girl, you’re going to be having a lot less sex. I’ve mostly been doing that, having lots of first time bangs and nothing more, and it’s disappointing when you liked the girl. My penis doesn’t care that I was one of a select few men, it just cares that it gets its dues, the more frequently the better. I’m working on resolving this – I strongly want the option of seeing a girl again if I so desire it.

  • Roosh_V

    “Focusing on retaining the women you’ve fucked will enhance your game and your results.”

    You seemed to have missed the point. I am saying not to cry or stress over a girl you lose, and you are talking about the benefits of a relationship. .

    When you lose a girl, you will never know why unless it’s obvious (less than 10% of the time), and even if the girl tells you, it probably won’t be the real reason. While you always want to be moving forward with your game, getting upset over a specific loss is one-itis and pedestalization, and must be avoided if you want to improve your results in the future. You are free to retain women based on your own needs, but when you lose them, you shouldn’t start listening to love songs and think “what coulda been.”

    You can find retainment advice here: http://www.rooshv.com/my-relationship-game-model

  • Ricky Vaughn

    Are you hooking up with club sluts? Might have to go more long game with a chaste girl or shy girl. Victor Pride wrote about this:

    http://boldanddetermined.com/2012/11/29/how-to-meet-shy-girls/

  • byronicmate

    Reading this post saddens me, as a newb. I almost wonder, why bother? Then again I’m told it’s rewarding so….Anyway, I understand the rationale.

    Roosh, Emmanuel, manosphere bros, check out this documentary if you want to see what “The goal of most women is to extract as many material resources from men as possible” looks like for high (and in some cases, average) caliber women.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgC9Z3uzPgY

  • Emmanuel Goldstein

    It’s like having a date go poorly. Perhaps there were some things that you could have done better, and perhaps there were some things that were out of your control. Had you done those certain things better, would the date have gone well? Maybe yes, maybe not. I’m never going to win every time, but there may be some steps I can take to improve my retainment rate, which I’m looking at now. I’ll look at your post now. You may not see it as a concern because your retainment rate is already high, while mine is pretty low, lower than my peers in similar straits. There’s no sense in mourning losses, but it might behoove one to recognize one’s own destructive patterns, ones I suspect that I’m currently stuck in.

    It’s like that prayer:
    God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

    The courage to change the things I can,

    And wisdom to know the difference.

  • Dr. Steve Brule

    One additional note. I think a man might have fewer regrets if he takes a few nude pics of her before she splits. I much less regret losing women now, but I regret not having little reminders. ;)

  • Vic the Dick

    Victor Pride should be ashamed of himself for 77.38% of the advice he gives.

  • LuisG

    Great post, I really needed something like this right now. It’s quite painful when you have a good success rate when getting 2nd bangs with girls you like. I had became used to assuming if I fucked a girl once, she would automatically be “mine” and when I recently failed at this one girl after having sex with her, it was very frustrating. I think it’s very hard to quite see the victory in there, I guess the best thing is to move on and focus on other prospects while trying to leave things with an open end with the girl you like, wihtout seeming needy.

  • katty

    looks like someone dumped our little rooshie :(
    another american slut?

  • seth datta

    Whatever feminists may claim, Roosh is totally right on this one. Most women are brainwashed in the West to be part of the ‘slut’ culture and not long-term girlfriends/mothers/wives. There’s no point having an emotional investment in most women who see males as disposable commodities, whose sole purpose is to make women’s lives easier at the expense of the male himself. Women like it this way, and those who seek fault with this paradigm should ‘not hate the player – hate the game’, which they enable.

  • http://therationalmale.com/ Rollo Tomassi

    You are merely the Alpha agent of righteous karma.

  • gmcp47

    ‘Sexual Pope’. Terrific!!!

  • Derrick Reed

    I recently lost a young cute girl I was fucking because I went all beta on her. I needed to read this.

  • Yuty

    Please be more specific

  • nik

    Quote:”Even if she’s a big slut, less than 100. This means that out of 3.5 billion men in the world, you were one of the lucky ones chosen to fornicate with her”

    This notion of “luck” is a bad notion to have. Sex is for release. And yes I only fuck chicks that rank minimal an 8 before I consider banging them. But even after the bang I realize its a bang and nothing more.

    When a man realizes that women are incapable of love (women only love what we do for them – Esther Vilar) then everything is put into perspective and very easy to quickly get on with one’s life once the ahem…. “romance” is over.

    It’s easy to remained detached when you know women don’t give a flying fuck about us.

    That said, when I bang a skag I don’t feel any more sense of accomplishment then if I successfully took a dump. It’s only a sense of release.

  • Average_Boy

    What if you have had sex with ugly indian girls, I am an indian man who had sex with 2 girls -I had sex with college girls in india (Yes right just 2 till now , i am 25) and both these girls are grotesque,I am very serious, i vomited after having sex with second girl, the smell and the ugliness is just unbearable.

    Could you please let me know how can a man overcome his first and second experience especially in a country like india?, I have had sex just 12 times so far with just 2 women. both are grotesque, they look average by indian standards but once they undress they are grotesque, this created lot of negative feelings in me towards sex.

    May be in your country you are blessed with tidy women with little bit cleanliness

  • CrabRangoon

    I could only get about 2 minutes deep into this before having an aneurysm. Who are these retarded men that just hand over their wallets for nothing in return??? Just hire escorts at that rate-at least you get laid. That being said I hope all these harpies die along and horribly.

  • typicalcollegebrah

    lol roosh doesn’t get dumped he just spins plates. sometimes a plate falls to the ground and breaks.

  • ? 2 Roosh

    Roosh—–

    As far as lifestyle goes things like entertainment and quality of restaurants
    How does Poland stack up against Brazil or Argentina???

  • Loco C

    I find joy in standing up to a woman. At bars I tell them to buy me a drink when they try to connive me for free drinks, etc. I don’t understand why these guys take so much off of women. The whole roman racketeer/Hollywood/feminazi industrial-complex has done immense damage to the male psyche but like Rage Against The Machine sang “We gotta take the power back!”.

  • nik

    That site caters to a demographic of seriously fucked up men who have zero dignity and who literally get off on having some skag tell him what a pathetic loser he is. It’s beyond sick…..

  • Kate

    Two things.

    1. It could very well be the kind of woman you are dating.

    2. It could be your post date behavior.

    This line struck me: “she explained she saw me only as a sexual person and not beyond that.” You need to get these women to invest in you emotionally as it seems they are seeing you as an object. (Egad, what a mixed up world we live in.)

  • WorldTraveler

    Roosh, I usually tend to support your articles and messages, but I do find this one a bit shallow. Why? Cause it doesn’t give an idea of what an ultimate goal should be. I’m certainly NOT opposed to sexual pleasures but everything should have limits and boundaries. It’s good and positive to have sex with no commitment at the age of 20 to about 30. But ain’t people supposed to settle down after certain age and try to create a strong and evolving family built on honesty, respect, support, mutual understanding and integrity where BOTH male and female would be willing to sacrifice something in order to get better as ONE!
    Your article somehow gives an impression that people should only go after sex during their entire life and don’t give a flying crap about anything else. May be I’m wrong. But I can read even between the lines and found no hidden agenda.
    How about a good and daring sexual life within a family? And if you want more sex then find a lady who’d be willing to “swing” WITH YOU! It’s all possible in the modern world.
    You sound like males should be after “wins” all the time, but ain’t it a “win a battle-lose the war” situation?:-)
    Think about it;-)

  • Roosh_V

    Well your retainment rate will never be 100%. If it’s under 50%, look into what behavior you are doing (or not doing) after the bang that is different than before.

  • Resident Smartass.

    I disagree with this. I think most younger women in America are brainwashed into the “marriage mirage”, as I call it. I believe that most girls are obsessed with finding love, and will follow a man despite their morals and beliefs if that man offers her that love she craves. Typically the women are unhappy in the end, and the man satisfied as he feels good from completing another sexual conquest.

    However, I do agree with your view of modern feminism. Most modern feminists, from my experience, are not about gender equality and are instead about putting men down.

  • anonymous

    you missed the worst (best) part, at 07:45.

    She’s a frickin’ single mother!

  • Shaggy

    Very relevant! Words of wisdom to keep me pushing through. Ty

  • monster221

    men want sex (and kids sometimes) and women want resources (and also kids eventually). the way that two particular people of each sex arrange with each other to get those things is what culminates into a family.

    if a wife is a long term goal and you try to go through life looking for a wife, you will be disappointed and in all likelihood divorced.

    what you do is just pick one. i say “when im 50 ill marry an 18 year old but til then ill enjoy the selection process”. when you are older and established and experienced and tired of the game, you just look around at the women in your life and pick one that you are willing to work with.

    worry about yourself and what you want. you can be rest assured that the women you meet will be doing the same. and with each interaction a sort of arrangement will develop and take its course, hopefully involvingframes sex for you (if not you are doing it wrong). then when you are old, you will decide what arrangement you would like and work towards that and some broad you are screwing will fall into that role. then you will have kids, die when they are in their 30s, and your wife will live for maybe 20 more years and remarry some schmuck that had been trying to screw her for 30 years.

  • Question To European Gamers

    As far as Europe goes-
    Where are some of the best food and nightlife destinations???

    If its anything like America-all the talent flocks to spots that have both of these.

  • Majikchris

    I used to go into what I call thinkers rage if I got dumped, analyzing everything I did or didn’t not do, but its pointless. Remember these key facts. There’s more women, you’re awesome so always be confident and control the conversation, actually having a life helps so dont sit on your ass or you won’t have anything to talk about, and bitches love dick so if ya get dumped chances are she will come back eventually in some way just notice the signs on that day. I fucked my neighbor for years, we were never dating but she wasn’t a, whore when I stopped fucking her or vice versa she became a whore for a year got fat became an alcoholic and then a year later I told her she was a fat ugly whore to her face (always go the face to face , never insult thru, a phone or email they will imagine it different) and low, and behold months later she lost the weight put down the bottle got a job stopped texting all but one man and I’m a fuck buddy every now and again. Be assertive, have confidence, dont forc but instead manipulate. And being handsome helps. But if they never come back man up and find a better one. You are man this is your planet

  • HatefulFeministCulture

    Very kind words, it all comes down to this true feminist quote “Why are women… so much more interesting to men than men are to women?” ― Virginia Woolf”

    The way it works in Canada, is the woman is looking to live in your nice big house in the suburbs, and to quit working. Every married man here has an ugly wife who doesn’t work(that looked good when she was in her 20′s, only to scam a man), or if they have a decent job when they meet you, they want to quit working once you marry them, very sad scene here, and women shame you for approaching, there is no such thing as solo game here, they have to know your net worth before you approach. Bunch of pretentious wannabe’s. You see a hot girl with an ugly/average guy here 100% he is rich. They are ALL looking for the free ride, the ugly women are very hateful here because they don’t get the free ride, but they are just as sadistic and manipulative as a prettier girl. The women here will wait DECADES for a rich man than just leave you it’s kind of their gig. They marry a middle class guy, than as soon as someone better comes along, they take half your money and house and get rid of you, That’s the scheme, they got the free ride and all of your wealth and guess what they did for it? nothing, meanwhile you have a huge chunk of your life destroyed, all those hours worked, this further lowers you dating market value which is difficult enough already for a decently looking young guy. The guy is right, Sex is like taking a dump, Just another primitive instinct that should be assigned no higher value. I thought men were supposed to get rich and not invest in a parasitic scheme? Men are slowly waking up to the truth and feminist culture is being exposed for the true LIE that it IS! soon the free ride will be over and men will no longer be suckers, WOMEN will have to ass kiss!

  • capt D

    wrong. they dont want a marriage, but a wedding. they dont want to love, but to be loved. freeloading, basically.

  • Roving eye

    Superb article, bang on target

  • Ternarydemon

    Not only if you fucked her, but als if you didn’t. If you gamed her, and failed without getting the fuck, then don’t give a fuck anyway. If possible, learn from your mistakes. If not, then continue. I have had women dumping me right as I was goin to penetrate them, after the fact, or even after only three texts (for real).

  • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

    Don’t worry about food, hot women don’t eat much, it’s just a sick American obsession. Prague is good. Roosh has said good things about Kiev. I like Warsaw, but more so for day game than nightlife. I’ve heard good things about Croatia from Roosh and others.

  • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

    Maybe in the rural U.S. or among a minority of women, but younger women in America are all about riding the cock carousel. They may have an idealization of marriage, but most of them want no part of it before 30+ Ironically, most men want no part of them after 30. The clever ones get banged out for a couple of decades and then get a chump to put a rock on it. Its a sad existence.

  • F.U.

    Agree… He makes good points at time but then at other times he comes off as being just as superficial as those in D.C. Maybe it’s just an act to get people to read his blog???

  • Roosh

    Roosh swings both ways – and brothers – he’ll do things with your cock that will make you believe in the All Mighty.

  • http://quintuscurtius.com/ Quintus Curtius

    This is fucking precious. Print this out, laminate it, and staple it to the inside of your coat.

  • http://quintuscurtius.com/ Quintus Curtius

    EG:
    Actually, I see this post as precious…
    And let me give my reasons.

    This has happened to me, like all guys, many times. It’s unavoidable. It’s always going to be infuriating, frustrating, and confounding to be flaked on after you’ve closed.
    But such is life.

    This way of thinking at least gives us a philosophical way out of the pain.
    It’s actually something that a Stoic or an Epicurean of old could have written.

    It’s akin to the remark of Epictetus who said we should not feel regret at the approach of death. The loss of pussy, like the loss of life itself, has to be seen in philosophic perspective.

    He who has feasted at the table of life, and enjoyed its rich banquet, will inevitably have to get up and leave the table; he will have to make way for another diner at the banquet of life.

    Enjoy the time you spent at the table, and appreciate the transitory nature of all material pleasures.

    And Roosh, you bastard, that popes comment is something I wish I had written. I may have to plagiarize that analogy….lol….

  • Sexual Pope

    “you are essentially one of the sexual popes of her life”. I just about died laughing on that one. An article that was perfectly timed for what I needed to hear.

    Call me old fashioned, but it seems 5 – 10 years ago if you laid the pipe, there was at least SOME emotional investment from all but the most broken broads. Now it seems for the most part that the lay is equivalent to what a makeout used to be, and the makeout is now like a damn hug to them.

    The only solutions I see are: 1) getting rid of the scarcity mentality by seeing multiple women and/or 2) assfucking them (wasn’t this an article on ROK?). Not sure which one of these options is easier… Perhaps #2 (hehe)

    Also agree with the guy below, get naked pics or some other kind of memento. Personally, I take the panties as a prize when I can – smell is the sense most strongly tied to memory, correct? Definitely easier to grab them at her place without her noticing. Don’t bother asking… 3:)

  • Lamarvin

    Does Polish food suck like German food???
    Sometimes I think France would be a good game trip- petite, stylish women. I’m not even into brunettes but one of the best looking girls I ever met was a petite French girl.
    PS- I was hoping for a more exotic answer besides the standard fare. I like new and different things and as far as eating goes its just like women IMO- quality over quantity. You can go gorge on a bunch of McDonalds aka Team Murica 5s and 6s or eat some creeps with smoked salmon and Brie aka Euro 8s and >

  • http://patientambition.com/ Nick

    I like Polish food a lot. It’s similar in some ways to German food, but different in others, pierogi, barszcz, kotlety, etc. Results may vary, but Germany, France and the UK are going to have more women affected by feminism. Less so in EE. I think you can find great food in many countries, but you just have to be willing to try new things. Of course you’ll find great stuff in France and Italy, but you also might get ripped off because you’d be a tourist. Game wherever you go, but you’ll probably find the hottest women in Russia, where the food will be the least interesting.

  • Cedric The Impaler

    What’s sick is any society’s warriors, artisans, inventors, and designers having their own system their ancestors blood sweat and tears bought have legislators via he barrel of a gun make them kow tow to the maids, cooks, cleaners, and gossips for any arbitrary reason and to do otherwise is “misogynistic” bull!!!!!!!
    Whoever you are your logic is beyond half ass.
    Only in the Anglosphere ran by Joos and their banks and social engineering has a Nation of warriors been made to wear pink sweaters by punks and chumps and it be called good. Shame on you Anglosphere men!!!!!!!!! Get your nuts back from the joos and the cooz.

  • ‘Reality’ Doug

    The post looks good to me.

    “If she says “I want to take it slow” and you say “Yes, me too” and then actually do take it slow you are wasting your time.”

    “Don’t confuse shyness with mental instability or depression. … Find a shy girl and leave the broken girls alone.”

    Good find, RV. I am not sure I have even seen a shy girl that was at least a 6. I’ll have to start looking. Only recently do I see the cock carousel girls for what they are. They are starting to let their beta guard down for me.

  • Las Vegas T

    Hey that shit happens to the absolute best of us.

  • Las Vegas T

    Well here in Las Vegas, your more likely to have a one night stand than a meaningful relationship.

  • guest

    ” Most modern feminists, from my experience, are not about gender equality and are instead about putting men down.”

    Most modern WOMEN from my experience, are not about gender equality and are instead about putting men down.

    There. Fixed it for ya’.

  • guest

    Maybe they just felt guilty about giving up their pussies for you and this is a way for them to rebuild their own inner virtue, and redeem themselves in their own mind – by cutting you off from further access.

  • doramin

    Easy there tiger! Such women have ALWAYS existed. “Rinses” are nothing new.

  • doramin

    Is it just me, or is it the longer you watch this thing the more hideous they look? Their makeup looks like it was done by an undertaker.

  • kirk

    true, with naked pics you will be surprised by how much you inflated her looks in your head while you were with her…

  • Tom From Myspace

    Hanks Roosh, I feel like a pretty cool guy now.

  • themaskandrose

    Great article. Definitely helpful right now, just banged probably the hottest girl I’ve ever had–a gorgeous Filipina model. I have no idea if I’ll see her again, she just let me know she can’t wait for my smooth, thick cock to fill her from the inside…but maybe next week. I get quickly annoyed of hot/cold games, so I’m just gonna ignore her for a while and take pride in my penile victory.

  • Christian Hunt

    Could not agree more. Just move on to the next. Don’t give her a second thought. You got what you wanted and that is the goal.

  • ping

    It all boils down to who would you rather love ( or fuck?) She just trade up it’s nothing but a bad luck that she found someone who made a better offer

  • ping

    No only you need to be at top of the game, you need to be a good fucker

  • V12

    Great post. We have all been there at one time or another and will be there again and again. Easy to lose sight of what’s important.

  • BTLS4

    The pope analogy is great. If a girl is alternating with two guys, is one the anti-pope?

    It’s also kind of like being the WWE Intercontinental Champion with multiple title reigns possible. Or if she’s really slutty it’s more like the old WWF Hardcore Title where the belt can be won 24/7 and multiple title changes in one night are not unexpected or surprising.

  • Brandon Green

    You’ll hear women often say that the man who is the one lucky who get’s “her” in
    a relationship. Really ? Typically he is “unlucky”! The “lucky” man is the one who
    “hit’s it” and “quits it”

  • Brandon Green

    I believe that American women are at BOTH ends of the spectrum
    and not in between. They go from “slut” to “tee-totaler” in one move,re-invent themselves and attempt to find a “victim” .

  • Brandon

    Best i have heard in along while.

  • Brandon Green

    These men are pathetic. An older man cannot see the game ?
    And these women although decent are not THAT GREAT!
    Wow!

  • Brandon

    I do the same thing. Let the idiots buy them a drink.

  • Aunt Mandi

    You rationalize it as a conquest. Don’t think we don’t do it either, especially when one is young and tumescent. Whatever gets you through the night. From an (old) woman’s point of view, it’s probably not your fault. She might even like you. A lot. But for whatever reasons, she can’t deal with it. Her weakness; her bad. If you keep tabs on her, you will probably see a pattern of this. Good luck.

  • Steve

    Las Vegas huh, I am from there. How is life with 20 men for every girl?

  • Las Vegas T

    Just fine when your an alpha male……..

  • The Day Game

    This is a great article. I posted something about this on my site too recently.

  • GetItGoing

    Wow