Fried Chicken Empire

I’m in the dumps. It started during my final days in Rio around the time of my five year blog anniversary. My Danish roommate already left for São Paulo and I was going through some drama with a girl. My subsequent travels through the state of Minas Gerais were pleasant, especially the weekend in Belo Horizonte, but I started losing motivation to do things.

I went to Córdoba, planning to stay for at least two months, but it became apparent that I wasn’t going to last. I made an honest effort on the girls for one whole week but then gave up completely, realizing that I really didn’t like them. I didn’t care for the challenge. Eventually I dated a Brazilian girl who I met through my young landlord. She tried to drag me to clubs but I resisted, saying I rather do quieter things.

My apartment didn’t have internet so I sat and watched VH1 Classic and Style & Life for over three hours a day. I followed a four-year-old season of Project Runway and also saw a gay guy beat out all the girls on Paris Hilton’s show. I didn’t want to study Spanish, didn’t want to write, didn’t want to travel, didn’t want to hit on girls, and I didn’t want to read. I forced myself to take Spanish lessons just keep myself busy, so I could say I was doing something productive.

I came back to America and it’s been fine so far. It’s great catching up with Virgle Kent, Roissy, and The Rookie, and especially fun to watch The Rookie in action. He reminds me of my younger self when I approached not just to get laid but to experiment or have a laugh. Now I just approach to get laid. It’s a job, putting in my time to get that notch.

My two books sell on their own. I’ve already put in the grunt work for a setup that is mostly passive. I’m not rolling in money, but I do make enough to live comfortably in developing countries. If I stopped being so fucking lazy I could make more, but with a good amount of cash saved up (enough for my future travel plans that I’m thinking of this winter), I can’t get excited enough to work more than I am now.

With the blog I’ve been doing the bare minimum, three posts a week. You’d be annoyed if I did less. This isn’t because I don’t have ideas, but I’m simply too lazy to develop them. I have a file with ideas so old that I don’t remember what angle I was going to take. So I delete them, a potential nugget of knowledge lost forever because I didn’t want to work for a few minutes.

I think I’m feeling down because I’ve reached my loftiest goals. I’ve shared all that I’ve wanted to share. I’ve banged the girls I’ve wanted to bang. I’ve experienced what I’ve wanted to experience. And I have enough money in my pocket that I don’t need to steal other people’s drinks anymore, no trivial accomplishment if you’ve been there. It’s true I could dig deeper, but I’ve hit the point of diminishing return in most things I’ve set out to do. You pass the peak of something and it becomes a grind, so it’s easier to repeat the process with something new. But what new worthy goal should I set out to do? Try to write for a magazine? Get a book “professionally” published? Accumulate lots of money? Aim for fame? I wish I cared more about those things.

Lately I’m having some morbid thoughts. I do a lot of healthy things so that I can live a nice long life, but now I’m questioning that. People are running marathons twice a year so they can live until 85 instead of 70. But what are you going to do after 70? Go to Europe a couple times a year? Watch more television? Unless you’re lucky like Hugh Hefner, who’s looking pretty frail these days, old age is no joy ride, regardless of how healthy you can keep yourself. Would you trade shoes with your grandparents? Because that’s what you have to look forward to. I never believed it made much sense to plan to work your ass off now in order to make it to an age period where the grim reaper is on your doorstep, but I understand we need a lot of people to think that so society can function.

I think many people refuse to accept death. A deep fear of it then manifests itself in obsessions and compulsions with exercise and food (only grass fed and organic!), and sometimes environmental concerns (no plastic bags!). At least it keeps them busy. The reason I work out and eat right is now for mostly aesthetic reasons. I’d eat pizza and McGriddle sandwiches every day if it didn’t make me feel lousy and increase my body fat percentage. Why not otherwise? To preserve a couple years when the highlight of my day is waking up and realizing I’m not dead yet like many of my friends and relatives? I’ve read stories of the 80-year-old man lifting a piano over his head and another a few years younger building a fried chicken empire from scratch, but I’m realistic to know that those things probably won’t happen to me. And say I have children. Are they going to want to deal with an old man who can barely hear and do very little besides sit in a recliner and stare blankly off into space, reminiscing about the glory days where all his sexual perversions were satisfied? This isn’t Colombia where my kid is obligated to take care of me until I die but America where I’d be lucky if my nursing home is within 100 miles of my spawn.

I understand that while life is long, there is a window for the best years, starting in your early 20′s and ending somewhere in your late 40′s. I know I only have 30 good years at the most, and I have already used up a third of that. But right now I’m wasting my days, and I’m not sure how to get out of it.

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  • Anonymous

    good post. good luck man.

  • http://travelvice.com craig | travelvice.com

    Hobbies, personal projects, school, employment, & kids — ways how most people keep themselves busy at this point.

    craig | travelvice.com’s last blog post: Just Married!.

  • Anonymous

    Time to conquer eastern europe me thinks.

  • pilgrim37

    Killing Time (Kris Kristofferson)

    See that long line of people who keep standing in the rain
    Looking tired,getting cold,
    And that signal light they’re waiting for ,don’t ever seem to change,
    Killing time,ain’t it slow

    Watch them bending with the burden of the pennies that they save,
    Marking time,growing old,
    Slowly marching by the numbers to the freedom of the grave
    Killing time ,ain’t it slow

    That’s the closest thing to living that they’re ever gonna know,
    And their good times ain’t no better than their bad
    Cause they think they need a signal light to tell
    they can go,
    Killing time ,ain’t it sad

    Don’t feel sorry for those people who keep standng in the rain,
    they don’t mind,they don’t know,
    Cause it never crossed their mind they got a reason to complain,
    Killing Time ,ain’t it slow

    They’re not haunted by the visions that they never dared to see
    And they never miss the dreams they’ve never had,
    They’re condemned to go on living in a penitentiary,
    For Killing time,ain’t it sad

  • Anonymous

    I’m sure there are quite a few flags you’re still missing.

  • olivherbst

    I can see two directions, to get you out of your state of numbness.

    First: Have a near death experience. And I don´t mean jumping out of an airplane. Have someone who truly hates you beat you to near death. You WILL appreciate life and all those small things around you again. And you will be obsessed with learning the skills to prevent such a beat down.

    Second: Get a girl you genuinely like, settle down, have kids. This might be the easier route. And maybe the one, which fulfills you even more – not just keeping you busy.

  • Pete

    Don’t stress about it. I’ve been in that situation; just relax, take a break, and you’ll feel like your old self in a few months.

    In relation to your morbid thoughts – living a healthy life isn’t for your 70s/80s, it’s for how you feel right now. But it’s also ok to take a break from that now if you want to.

    Just relax and do whatever you feel like now. Eventually you’ll feel more motivated but its nothing you need to worry about now.

  • http://gameforomegas.wordpress.com Omega Man

    You sound like an Olympic medalist- having won the prize, what do you do next? Every athlete retires sometime.

    You’ve accomplished something all men dream of but few ever achieve- the sexual success they want. And from your story I give you a lot more credit.

    I think you will find other goals to get excited about pursuing soon.

    Omega Man’s last blog post: Book Review- “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell” by Tucker Max.

  • AlphaXalpha

    First things first, look in the mirror, and smack yourself in the face for being a whiny estrogen filled drama queen.

    I mean, what did you expect to happen when you decided to check out of the real world, and go putz around without developing any useful skills, and then periodically return to your parents basement, all the while waking up at noontime?

  • http://sectorlv.wordpress.com Culdcept

    It’ll pass. Everyone goes through stages like this when you start thinking about where life is taking you. I think part of it is the realization that being old can be worse than death. You’ve accomplished the dreams of many men and are respected for it. I like what Pete said above:

    “In relation to your morbid thoughts – living a healthy life isn’t for your 70s/80s, it’s for how you feel right now. But it’s also ok to take a break from that now if you want to.”

    Culdcept’s last blog post: When friends make bad descisions.

  • inSOMnia

    Time to settle down Rooshie.

  • http://mavericktraveler.com ElGuapo

    That how I feel after one crazy year in Brazil, probably one of the best of my life in many ways. But more challenges and life discoveries await.

    There’s Eastern Europe that I’d love to try Brazilian game on, and more spiritual places like India that I’ve been eyeing.

    Growth, comfort, growth, comfort. Rinse and repeat.

    ElGuapo’s last blog post: Living Series: Belo Horizonte, Brazil.

  • Vincent Ignatius

    You could write a book on Ethiopia.

    In all seriousness though, writing is something that you are clearly good at and appear to enjoy. But you definitely haven’t hit your peak there. Bang was great and your writing has probably only gotten better since then. Maybe this can turn into something bigger.

  • http://therookiedc.wordpress.com/ The Rookie

    It seems like you’re suffering a mid-life crisis a little early. Rejecting a lot of material things means you don’t have the same motivation that requires lots of money to reach certain goals. You’ve reached those goals that money didn’t require. So you’re experiencing it 10 years early…

    I could spout out goals, like being the best at pick up on the east coast, or getting enough passive income to get a nice place in the city. Or get a ripped body. But those are goals maybe for me. You have some but only you know what those are.

    The Rookie’s last blog post: I See You.

  • Robert

    Roosh,

    You once wrote about childless women in their thirties wondering what that missing essence in their life was. Maybe it can happen to us too. Much of what we do in this culture are distractions from our basic biological instinct to reproduce (career, hobbies, wealth).

    Lately I’ve become a lot closer with my parents, and I got the chance to talk to them about what it was like having kids. My dad was always a hardass who never liked to talk about mushy stuff like that, but he was almost in tears when talking about how proud he was watching us grow up. Sure it’s different for everyone and I don’t want to sound like a bored mother, but maybe fulfilling that natural instinct will bring more weight to your life.

  • Chris

    1. First, you are definitely clinically depressed. Thats a biological issue that won’t go away with behavioral changes. A lot of your ennui is do to neurochemical imbalance. Try to get some clinical help for this. While none f us like the idea of taking pills, the quality of life increase could be worth it.

    2. Second, it does seem like you need to go deeper instead of wider, when it comes to women.

    i agree that getting laid becomes a job that never ends, and truthfully has limited appeal past a certain point of our youth. I mean its nice, but the work involved compared to the reward is ridiculous. Getting into a relationship with a woman, and having companionship as well as easier regular access to sex, can be worth it. Go on that relationship hunt, just be sure that you find the right woman.

    The problem with this is that you may have to go through a few relationships before you find a worthwhile one. Therefore, start the hunt now so that you can get the work out of the way and get to where you want to be before you get even more tired of dealing with women.

    I’m just reaching the point where Im feeling like I need to settle down as well, and Im about your age, so I can relate very well to how you feel about your current mode of operation.

    3. You are currently doing well with your books, but please don’t take it for granted. Your right, its no small accomplishment. Don’t let your work slip away. Be sure to value what you’ve accomplished so far, and the passive income that it brings, and make sure that it lasts the rest of your life. You might be up a creek if it starts to slip. Maybe its work to keep going, but not as much work as a 9-5.

  • Chris

    Oh yeah, and life is meaningless and pointless.

    Once you accept that, I find that happiness is easier to come by.

    If nothing in life matters, then you are free to enjoy the smaller moments without worrying about how you will improve your lot in life or otherwise worrying about the future. NONE OF IT MATTERS. Just enjoy each breath, because one day your breathing will stop, and thats not such a big deal either (as it isn’t with any of us).

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com The G Manifesto

    Travel Hangover.

    A summer in DC should cure that.

    - MPM

    The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Fame VS Game in Newport Beach.

  • jl02

    Roosh, I’ve learned a lot from your stuff, but….

    in the end, I think the Catholics have it right (I am one). The purpose of life is to love and be loved. Get married to a good girl and have kids.

  • George

    Ride it, man. Just ride it.

    Happened to me when I hit 30, nothing I did made any difference and brought me out of it. A year had to pass until something like the old zest returned. You just have to ride it out.

    It happens when a goal that has consumed your life for so long suddenly loses its meaning; game.

    You gotta realize you are not entirely in control in life, gotta sit back, indulge the apathy and laziness, do little or nothing that isn’t strictly enjoyable, and then after a year or so your mind discovers on its new own new projects and directions. But you can’t force the process. Your mind will tell when the batteries are recharged and when something new has meaning for you.

    Could be a few months, could be a year. In the meantime, enjoy the laziness!

  • Papillon

    Just keep going?
    time re-read your own posts man

  • http://buildanew.me Matt

    Roosh,

    Man up and get out of your funk. Set some new goals…

    Start strength training and set your sights to be able to dead lift 500, squat 400 and bench 300 in 2 years.

    Start a philanthropic project… Maybe a game workshop/bootcamp for dudes who can’t afford the premium ones from ‘gurus’.

    Stop worrying about a morbid future and live in the present. Be comfortable being. If you are unhappy or bored, fucking get out and do something about.

    Of course, you know all this shit. Funks come and go. There are many more things in this world you’ve yet to experience or see, go out and find them.

    -Matt

    Matt’s last blog post: Melt Away Body Fat.

  • Chris

    Also, you have an incredible opportunity to find something to get trained in that will fulfill you for a career. You have passive income that will help finance your living arrangements and tuition. Most people don’t have that. Obviously, doing something that will help people would be the most fulfilling and would give you some purpose in life.

    If I was in your situation, I would train in Prosthetics. If you move now, you will beat the 2012 deadline for having to have a masters degree. Get a one year certificate, do a one year residency, and then you have the skill to fit limbless people with prosthetics. You can then do travel missions to 2nd and third world countries, or start a lucrative practice in the USA. Your passive income is the key to doing all of this without pressure.

    Or find something else that fulfills you career wise. Most people that are suggesting kids are doing so because they think it will fulfill you. I say that getting a fulfilling career is much more responsible than having a kid for purpose of fulfillment. Once you do that, then think of the kid if you still feel the need. You can always change careers, but kids are permanent.

  • dc

    chris:
    can you post more info on this prosthetics training?

  • Adrian

    I was in your position a few years ago.

    I decided to sell up, change country and embark on a new challenge, culture and language. This gave me a fresh perspective on things, new friends and outlook. I suspect I’ll do the same thing again in a few years time…now considering China annd learning Madarin.

    I know you’ve done South America but the world is a big place and the great thing about life is that you never know what’s round the corner…

    cheers, A

  • Jesus

    go to tim ferris’ blog, maybe he’ll give you some inspiration.

  • DoesNotMatter

    maybe you want to meditate? You’re already almost there

    http://www.dhamma.org

  • Carl Sagan

    I think we all go through funks like this.

    I just try to limit those shitty existentialist thoughts as much as I can.

  • Johnny G

    You are more motivated then lots of people I know, and maybe it is time for a book tour?

  • newly divorced

    Dude,

    Take up a new hobby besides pick up. Something manly like kickboxing or jiu jitsu. That will give you something to look forward to rather than your routine.

    You sound like you need something new in your life.

  • Papillon

    Go to medical school

    you can join dr’s w/o borders

  • Meck

    I just started taking piracetam due to lack of focus and laziness. I am in a not to far off situation having lived in 5 countries, backpacked through 25+ other countries, i am now kind of asking what the hell do I do next?

    This piracetam stuff (look it up on wiki) has regained my focus now I am well on my way to become a pro online poker player. crazy shit.

    good luck man.

  • http://www.indonesiamatters.com/contact-us/ Patung

    Come to Indonesia, or any Asian country, for a change….nothing like the thrill of being in a totally new place where everything is so new and exciting. I even miss the incredibly bad smell near canals, rarely notice it now…

    Patung’s last blog post: Mavi Marmara Incident.

  • Friend

    You’re a smart person. Pay attention and try to learn something.

    You’ve devoted your being to getting a tickle in your pee-pee. Now it’s been tickled a lot. Feel great?

    However fulfilled you feel, that’s how fulfilled you will be when you achieve your next goal.

    Stop tricking yourself.

    Contentment comes from within.

  • Anonymous

    while getting older is scary when you’re young, lots of older people are actually pretty happy

    http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/01/health/research/01happy.html

  • Jurko

    Next time you’re in Brazil, drink ayahuasca.

    New vistas will open.

  • gringoed

    Roosh

    If Cordoba girls couldnt get you excited, there’s definitely something wrong!

    I’d recommend reading some more philosophy or classic literature. People have gone through this.

  • AlphaXalpha

    32 Meck

    If your newfound wisdom is to become an online poker player, maybe you should reconsider whether or not that drug is helping you.

  • AlphaXalpha

    1. Do NOT have a kid. People who have kids to fill gaps in their lives are retards. Take care of your own bs before breeding.

    2. Do NOT just screw off and go travel somewhere. You can run as far as you want but you can’t get away from yourself.

    3. DO learn a useful skill, and develop some hobbies that aren’t superficial.

  • James Horner

    write a novel

  • Straight Ken

    Roosh, your too smart for these “Pick Up” mind games.

    Who else in this little online world would recommend a Noam Chomsky book?

    Dude is nearing 90 years old, so was Howard Zinn. I think they were living pretty fucking well for that age… Chomsky just blew my mind with an amazing speech last week that nails exactly where the world is going… transcending the stupid idea of “political spectrum”:

    Also, Johnny Cash good role model for really old dude who was still rad, recording his “American” series of rock covers right until his death.

    Meanwhile, pure “Playboys” like Hefner are embarrassing to look at and much grosser in bed I’m sure.

    Take your pick of role models. Wish you the best.

    Ken

  • Straight Ken

    Oh, forget to include the speech I mentioned. You can read or watch it:

    http://www.democracynow.org/2010/5/31/noam_chomsky_the_center_cannot_hold

  • pepini

    Roosh you´re already doing something quite skillful. It might seem meaningfull to some, but it´s not.
    I can only talk about travel forum and your blog.

    You probably thought South America would be
    better than it was. Rio is nice for a vacation, but not to live. Too superficial. Go to Europe. Eastern Europe. Enroll in a university course there, not only languages, but something related to your college degree. You don´t have to go to classes, but key is meeting people by the conventional way not only in bars etc. You have to stay there more than 6 months to make lasting relationships.

    If you´re not happy with what you´re doing change it till you do. You still don´t have responsibilities traping you down.

    Don´t have babies to fill your void. That´s the dumbest thing you could do. Have it when you feel like the time as come, don´t push it.

    You could translate your books to different languages (spanish, portuguese, chinese). Just a thought.

    You´re already good with women, now it´s time for choosing another subject you like to improve.

    “Has anything you´ve done made your life better?”
    If so continue doing it, if not change it.

  • Mala

    Im big believer in compulsory military service. My friends from Rio say they have it in Brazil. True?

    I personally have enjoyed serving my country abroad and here. Do you love the outdoors, to break things and blow shit up as I do? Perhaps Military/Fire/Law Enforcement might be an exciting new challenge for you. I can attest that I am very satisfied with my work and have never been more challenged in my life. It’s not for everyone though, but if military is not your thing, I know State Police and FBI need scientists too. Trust me that academy or boot camp will be far more challenging than game. I am rooting for you.

  • Mike

    You’ve reached the hedonist’s paradox. The Wiki entry for “Paradox of hedonism” is a pretty good introduction.

  • Chris

    DC,

    Find my profile in the forum, “Hydrogonian”, and PM me. I can fill you in with the details privately.

  • Michael

    I like Pete’s suggestion of just relaxing. I’m in the same situation as you (psychologically but for vastly different reasons).

    I recently took a manual labor job with absolutely no responsibility, other than being a worthy worker (a job that wasn’t necessary but I thought I might as well). Is it alpha? Well, the position isn’t; but there’s something satisfying for a man to work with his hands and be able to see what he’s accomplished on a daily basis.

    I took a break from game, although that was pretty circumstantial. However, after putting in no effort for some time (a month or two) I’m realizing how desirable I am by the girls that are coming to me. There’s no bounty but I’m now able to see and appreciate a lot of opportunities that I otherwise might have ignored. That doesn’t mean less desirable girls either. Now I’m practicing game again.

    My point is that I’m turning around and finding new motivations. You should try it. It’s turned out to be a break that has given me new perspective.

  • http://www.southernmanblog.com Southern Man

    Life doesn’t end at forty. Or even fifty. Trust me on this. I’m having the best decade of my life, in every way, right now.

  • FARC

    Next up is the religious phase. You’ll slide right in to Jesuit Missionary work.

  • just another one

    I like some of the advice here, like Chris´s and AlphaXAlpha..

    It’s funny how, always, when people give advice, they advice you to do what would be best for THEM and what they would DO. But it’s not guaranteed that it works for YOU. I guess more times doesn’t than does. But of course it works that way.. I’d also give advice from my own personal life but I dont want to play like i knew you enough for that..

  • Anonymous

    Find a purpose in life try reading this to get you started “Way of the Superior Man”.
    Your entering the emptiness of pick up stage after a couple hundred notches we all get there
    ……a man can only truly be satisfied by following his true purpose. Pussy alone doesnt make a man happy..its not bad though :)

    I myself have quite a nihilist view on life as I would say you may have too. It makes finding a purpose all that more difficult.

    I like the post though mate…feels really from the heart and soul. Maybe your best post!

  • Mark

    Make someone else happy. Slow down. It sounds corny but it works. I mean, if you have been to six continents where are you gonna go next? Hang out with penguins? Travelling is fun until you realize you have been trying to run away from… yourself. As for depression, don’t fight it. You will get through it faster that way. Good luck.

  • speakeasy

    Descartes said, “Conquer yourself rather than the world.” If you haven’t found happiness from within, then nothing in the outside world is going to provide it for you. I’m not criticizing you here (because I’m kind of the same), but you pretty much live a completely selfish life. Selfish in the sense that you only seem to live to satisfy the self. I remember you posted some narcissism test on twitter and said you are off the charts. Think about the implications of that. I bet there are very few people who are extremely narcissistic that are genuinely happy.

    I feel like this…if you can’t get high off normal life, then something is wrong with YOU. And I mean even just the little things that make life worth living. Maybe you need to do a volunteer project for Habitat for Humanity or something. Try working toward something noble outside the self. Break bread with people way more destitute than you, yet happier than you. You might learn something from them. I’m not trying to sound preachy or anything because like I said, I’m selfish as hell too and I also am in a bit of quandary about what direction to take life in and figuring shit out too.

  • http://cavemanchris.wordpress.com CAVemanChris

    Hey man don’t kill yourself lol. You sound bored…how can this be? You travel all the time, experience different cultures? Maybe you need to satisfy some of your sickest perversions to breath some life into yourself. go kill someone and eat them I guarantee you’ll feel better!

    CAVemanChris’s last blog post: FR: Gua Rapo 10-23—-10-24-09.

  • AlphaXalpha

    Also, in the very short term, it sounds like you need an adrenaline boost.

    I would suggest that you try to keep your masturbation sessions down to no more than 5 a day.

    Also, seriously speaking, go to some Krav Maga classes. You don’t even have to be in the tribe to enjoy them. They are intense, fun, you meet people.

    Body and mind go together.

    On another note, it occurred to me that your actions are a paradox/ironic. You were initially rejected by women, so you made it your mission in life to follow and practice some sort of elaborate set of rules to “game” them and to “conquer” them. However, in seeking to do this, you did not, as you expected become bigger and greater yourself.

    You wanted to become the Highlander of pussy. Every notch would move you up in the world.

    It didn’t and doesn’t work that way, because you became a slave to the pussy, rather than its master. You changed for women, they didn’t change for you.

    Do things different this time. Become what you want to be, and then let pussy come to you on your terms.

  • Stone

    That’s how I was starting to feel when I accomplished the following:
    - I turned 30
    - I reached manager level in a top consulting/accounting firm
    - My notch count reached the triple digits

    I took a sabbatical, spent 6 months at the beach… and was feeling much like you. Then I got married and had a baby daughter, much different now. Pretty happy so far.
    Hit me up if you are coming to EE.

  • West LA

    Sounds like how it is periodically when a lobster outgrows his old shell. For 3 days he is groggy, grouchy, slow, semi-blind, etc, while his old shell is cracking and falling off of him, to allow his new shell emerge. You just bear with it; let time fix it.

    You could look around for a new goal which inspires you like your old ones used to do.

    The sensations of shrewd, strenuous workouts and the sensations of being in amazing condition can become more rewarding than the sensations of eating junk food. Then it isn’t a sacrifice or deprivation, it’s simply ‘Now I find A more rewarding than B’.

    When your usual activities feel like just pointless dull work, it may be that you are so focused on the outcome that you will not let yourself alter/adjust your process, such that the process can be its own reward, indifferent to outcome.

    Or consider you might be like a rich person who despairs of the meaninglessness of life because he is so comfortable & secure, feeling no hunger, facing no risk… I always suspect that part of that person’s problem is that he is seeking meaning only within a sphere of pleasing himself, and if he started focusing on helping those who need help, he would suddenly find his existence quite meaningful.

    Good luck.

  • http://mavericktraveler.com ElGuapo

    @AlphaXalpha – I liked the second of your post. You’re absolutely right.

    I think the key here is validation. We’re all trying to get it to some extent after initial rejection. That’s why when you’re so dependent on some external element, you have these peaks of highs and lows.

    ElGuapo’s last blog post: Living Series: Belo Horizonte, Brazil.

  • Anonymous

    @51 Have you googled that book, and then googled the author? If not, here he is:

    http://www.google.com/images?um=1&hl=en&tbs=isch%3A1&sa=1&q=david+deida&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&oq=&gs_rfai=

    Looks hardly like a “superior man” to me. Haha.. I can’t believe you gamer boys take advice from people like this. Carry on, continue to over-analyze to the n’th degree.

  • Shaman

    You need to take a break and vegetate–go overboard, go semi-comatose in front of the TV while shoveling Haagen-Das in your mouth for 10 hours a day if you want.

    I do this a couple times a year. I am also insanely ambitious with very, very lofty long-term goals.

    Why do I do this? Because I occasionally end up where you are and the WORST thing you can do, that will just prolong it, is fight it and try to institute some “self-discipline” and make yourself do it.

    What happens? After a couple weeks of this shit, maybe a month, you get really, really sick of it and desperately want to go do something productive, so you do, and this time it’s awesome because you’ve got your old motivation and fire back.

    Seriously, don’t fight it, just give in for a bit and let yourself relax and recuperate for a while, let the pendulum swing a bit too far in the opposite direction and it’ll come back on its own.

    Cheers,
    Shaman

  • Shaman

    @51

    You’re fucking retarded.

  • Shaman

    Oops, I meant 59, not 51! Shit.

    That book IS really good, btw (Way of the Superior Man), David DeAngello has been recommending it forever.

  • Anonymous

    How lame is it that you know that there are girls who you want to bang read your blog so you put these faggy little musings up — hoping that they say “Gee, he’s not so bad. He is misunderstood. Maybe I can fix him.”

    Lame.

  • ccw

    As far as old age sucking, this study claims that people actually get happier after age 50: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/01/health/research/01happy.html

    I don’t really understand why, and maybe it’s a bullsh*t study. But maybe not.

  • CG

    @63

    I was thinking along similar lines. I figured since his last 6 posts have all received less than 40 comments he had to go into a deep whine session to make sure his readership was still out there…

  • slumlord

    Hedonism is a bummer.

  • Jesse

    “Life is nonsense so you might as well be extraordinary.”–Francis Bacon (the painter)

    You’re not extraordinary so there’s work to be done.

    That’s a good thing, by the way.

  • Chris

    67

    Great quote. Its the truth.

  • http://www.moralinefree.blogspot.com Jesse

    Here’s another fucking quote: “Don’t do anything for too long.”–Hemingway

    Maybe you’ve written about pussy for too long. Write about something else. Writing seems to be your thing and dropping that and picking up something new (children, MMA, whatever else these guys have proposed) just puts you in the category of dilettante: someone who gets good at a number of things but masters nothing.

    You’re decent but you’re not the best writer, so become the best. Pick the guy you think wrote best and write better than he has. Out-write him. Beat him. Try to become not only great in this life, but great forever.

    Its a project that will keep you busy until you shoot yourself.

  • Anonymous

    I want to have kids.

  • Morpho

    What?! Roissy is in DC after all?! He’s made the point on his blog multiple times in recent weeks, telling us that he’s no longer in DC. He even went so far as to claim that’s why he changed the name from “Roissy in DC” to “Chateau”.

  • http://www.vksempireofdirt.com Virgle Kent

    Great post man, the problem with posts like these is that everyone swears they’ve got the answer. In time it will all work itself out . That’s the thing about living for oneself as we do, it’s a pretty lonely experience, it won’t matter what country you go to next, what great city anything, you’ll still be alone even when surrounded by friends. Life purpose won’t come through more hobbies or different goals. In the end it’ll be living for others, wife, kids family. Like I said, it will all click.

  • just another one

    Some really good advice here. I hope this blog with these comments are up when I turn 30 or otherwise face similar situation.

    Anyway, why is it that so many of you guys think being old sucks? Of course it sucks if you’re stuck in a nursing home with no friends etc.. But if you’re in good condition, it’s totally different. I think most of the commenters here are Americans, who according to Hofstede studies, have one of the lowest LONG TERM ORIENTATION in the world:

    http://www.geert-hofstede.com/hofstede_united_states.shtml

    What does that mean? Well it means that in general, typical american is unable to think life in longer terms. It’s “I want everything NOW, preferably already yesterday. and yes, EVERYTHING!” attitude. That’s why America is so obsessed with being young, good-looking and successful. Old people are not respected as they once was or are in for example eastern countries. I am not saying which is the right way to go, I just want you to notice this. China has, btw, the highest Long Term Orientation in the world.

    I am far from being old guy myself, but these are somethings i have heard or could imagine being the pros of being old:
    - you have accomplished a lot in your life, be that family, children, enterprise, wealth, notches, experiences
    - you have seen life for a long time, you understand it better: you are wise
    - you understand not to give a shit about small things
    - you are happier
    - you are free to do what ever you want given you have the health and mone

  • Giovonny

    wow, over 70 comments. These philosophical posts always get way more comments then posts that are about getting girls. That has always been funny to me. I have come to the conclusion that guys who study game are just looking to fill a void in their minds. They think getting girls will fill that void, But after they bang a few dozen girls, they realize the void is still there.

    Maybe we all should be studying “self-help” instead of “Game”. Maybe at their core, they are the same thing. I don’t know.

    Interesting to see if Roosh becomes religous or not.

  • Sean

    Shaman

    “You need to take a break and vegetate–go overboard, go semi-comatose in front of the TV while shoveling Haagen-Das in your mouth for 10 hours a day if you want.”

    Come now Shaman, the man is not an American housewife.

  • Sean

    Don Giovonny, i blame female hypergamy and feminism.

  • Amy

    I think you are joking, Roosh, but if you aren’t, I hope you kill yourself for all the girls you have hurt. Karma is be a real drag, isn’t it?

  • just another one

    Giovonny,

    good point, and i think you are right. Probably many people are filling something in them. That’s why it’s sad/scary for me to read new game students’ blogs where they are super excited about it. I mean if they are toooo much into it. “The Rookie” here said he’d like to be “the best PUA on the east coast” or “get ripped” etc. Yeah, these are nice things but if these are your end goals, boy you are on the wrong track. Maybe you wake up at like 35yo. realize that you are these things but it just feels.. empty? Or maybe not, how could i know really.

    I think game is an important aspect to self development, but IT IS NOT THE ONLY ONE!! I have rarely done any “sarging” myself or even approached many girls during one night, but thanks to game i have been able to rack up my notch count to over 30 (from probably like under 10) in a couple of years. It has given me enough experience with girls and i think it has been mostly a good thing, but i am already getting a bit tired of chasing ass. For me, the sex organs of a woman is not the most important thing on this globe.

    In south america you meet some gringos who live of by passive income, be it investing, poker or what ever, they are living in pretty nice apartments and chasing local ass. Many, many, western guys think that “whoa, those dudes are living the dream”. Many commentators also here say that Roosh has accomplished something that many guys just dream of. Maybe, but think about it for a while:

    What’s so fancy about living in a 3rd world country without all the nice cultural and material things we have back home in the West? What’s so fancy about just meeting random travellers, banging locals and seriously lacking all real deep human relationships, both with males and females. Espeecially if the money is not pouring in, what’s so fancy about living in a slum chasing middle and lower class girls?

    Roosh does a good job playing down the materialistic things and how he doesnt need them and maybe that’s true for him. But is it true for everyone?

    It’s difficult to have “the best from the both worlds”. There are always trade-offs.

    Btw: question for Roosh and for all: are all of your friends “Pua/game” people? If so, think about how much that limits your worldview, because you all think the same. I love hanging out with friends who challenge my lifestyle.

  • pilgrim37

    I think this old guy might give you a few ideas on getting out of the funk,I’m in the same situ,but at least you have some passive income to cushion and give you time….he’s definately a little eccentric but knows a thing or to about facing adverse situations and goals !

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pmeIgsHg8h4&feature=related

  • Anonymous

    hey roosh, you liver is tired, do something to heal it and you should feel much better.

  • nathan

    Please don’t settle down/have kids anytime soon. I know another Flag Day is coming up but you have so much to live for! I don’t know what I’d do without your blunt and straightforward discussions on getting laid.

  • http://madjackshack.blogspot.com/ Mad Jack

    Do not, whatever you do, do not have a child. Believe it.

    I’ve gone through this state that you’re in about twice. The first time I changed careers, the second time I found a long term relationship. I expect that I’ll change careers again and go on a physical fitness kick.

    Find a different career. Even if it involves writing, which would likely be a good choice for you, I’d recommend finding a different career and a long term relationship with a woman of the opposite sex.

    If you’re really having trouble, Piracetam and a new girl friend who’s a psychologist may be a good choice.

    I, by the way, am over 50. I’ve never been married and have no children, and I do not regret those choices.

    Mad Jack’s last blog post: TARTA and Taxes.

  • Chaz

    Roosh, you feel proud and pleased of all you have done, which includes helping a lot of people (like me). I mean, shit, you’ve traveled all over South America for extended periods, gotten tons and tons of action, written at least two books, written so many excellent blog posts, etc. etc. I would be happy to have done all you have. Please keep up the good work, and take care of yourself.

  • Chaz

    Well, it looks like I omitted the word “should” from the first sentence above. I meant to say that Roosh, you *should* feel proud and happy to have accomplished all that you have! It is much more than many other people your age have done — and much more interesting, too!

  • http://wonkawilly.wordpress.com Willy Wonka

    Crazy shit. Outside of game (which I know I want to improve and work on and get better at), I feel this way about a lot of other stuff in my life right now….

    Willy Wonka’s last blog post: Am I Too Nice Now?!?.

  • speakeasy

    The discussion here is great. I would say though that the people suggesting that Roosh’s dilemma is just some temporary matter that can be cured by doing more of the same he’s been doing are just plain wrong. What I think he sorely needs(assuming this isn’t a neurological issue that needs medication) is a new outlook on life, a different philosophy, new goals. Like someone said, he’s done stuff that guys only dream of doing. Half of happiness is just appreciating what you already have in life.

  • spandrell

    wow, dozens of comments just to wish Roosh to get out of his depression.

    Most people can’t say that dude.
    FWIW, coming back home after living abroad is pretty depressing for everyone. You start to think about the future and find that you haven’t one.

  • spandrell

    btw I agree I don’t see the point of living more than 70. That’s why I smoke.

  • Anonymous

    40-50 are only good years if you’ve accomplished something, so that doesn’t apply to you. 20-40 are your best years and you;re depressed because you know you’ve wasted the first half and have no prospects for the second half of this period.

    Let this be a lesson for the rest of us.

  • AlfaShmalfa

    lol @ “estrogen filled drama queen” :) )) Maybe that’s why he can’t build any muscle – no testosterone.

  • Shlong Johnson

    all this just to say “I’m still depressed and all fuked up, as usual”???

  • Peter

    Roosh, I have the answer. You miss that sheep you boned in Columbia. You’ve got a bad case of sheep love, and now nothing else will do…

  • Can

    How can you sustain yourself with book profits??? Even if your profit is $15 per book and you live on $150 a week, you still need 10 losers a week just to get by. Do you really sell that much?

  • cg

    lol @ “estrogen filled drama queen” :) )) Maybe that’s why he can’t build any muscle – no testosterone.

    ———————————–
    He has got to have some testosterone with those hairy gorilla arms of his…

  • Carl Sagan

    The Science of Happiness:

    http://www.spring.org.uk/2008/01/avoid-sham-advice-on-living-good-life.php

    I figure this is a good place to start for those of you who are feeling like shit.

  • Anonymous

    Find a new outlook on life, a way to gauge happiness. Even though it’s great and you or I couldn’t live without it, there are a lot of things of value in the world besides finding a hot girl to bang.

    You’re whole philosophy that you’ve been developing is pretty fucked up, decent reading material though!

  • Anonymous

    No offense but #9 does have a point.

    Dedicating so much time and work to, essentially, banging random sluts never appealed to me. This isn’t meant as a personal attack – simply an observation of who I am and what I value. I bought your book, but threw it out without reading it because I realized this gamer stuff wasn’t for me. Even the people, generally speaking, that are attracted to it aren’t my cup of tea.

  • Anonymous

    Mind you, to elicit this number of responses, certainly says something. You are touching people in this subculture. Maybe you can find solace in that? Perhaps an opportunity can come of it.

  • http://www.PlayaPUA.com Playa

    Hey man, don’t worry – remember, sometimes you need to go to “that place” to get to the higher peak of the next mountain. GL my friend, you will succeed.

    Playa’s last blog post: Being In State – Savoy + Moxie.

  • Lumiere

    Easy solution?

    Stop relentlessly and , seemingly almost exclusively, listening to the negative voices in your head.

    Listen the the positive voice. What is it saying?

  • AlphaXalpha

    88
    Smoking is for retards. It is not just a question of how old you live to be, it is a question of quality of life.
    It is almost guaranteed that by the time you are 50, and often much sooner, you will experience significant respiratory and cardiovascular problems.
    You also have a good chance of developing much more serious illnesses like lung cancer.
    I saw my grandfather die slowly and painfully from lung cancer. Trust me, you don’t want to go out like that.

  • pilgrim37

    You want thoughts on life,work,luck,women,beauty,sex,relationships ,success,death then watch this video of an entertaining interview with the Australian,London based critic Clive James,a great writer and a funny man..let me know what you think,

    http://www.abc.net.au/tv/elders/video.htm?program=elders&pres=20091130&story=1

  • Jess

    I would grow the website and make more than a passive income from it. Try and make as much money as renowned PU artists–David DeAngelo, etc. I can’t imagine that there are more than a couple thousand people who visit this site more than once a week which is still pretty impressive but nothing amazing.

  • Santiago

    Amy: “I think you are joking, Roosh, but if you aren’t, I hope you kill yourself for all the girls you have hurt. Karma is be a real drag, isn’t it?”

    To Amy: Cunt, time to go change your maxi pad.

    To Roosh:
    I will be sending out an email to you at some point. But I think you are experiencing is normal. I seem to recall an expression: “The only thing worse than NOT getting what you want, IS getting what you want.” I think you have simply hit a plateu. Most men spend their lives in pursuit of the almighty stinkbox and when you do, and have done so enough times, you learn that females are not all that special. Like finally meeting the wizard of oz or something, if this anology makes any sense. I think you have to give it time and let your subconscious figure out what the next plan would be. Talk soon.

  • AlphaXalpha

    104 Santiago

    “in pursuit of the almighty stinkbox”

    Your choice of words makes you sound like a homosexual.

  • Anonymous

    Roosh you are a sex addict…every addict that is coming out of addiction (usually around your age 30-31) goes through the “why am I here” when heroin has not solved their personal or systemic problems you are going through now. You can’t solve an emotional issue with physical pleasure.

    You were rejected by women as a youngster so you spend ten years screwing every girl you can find trying to numb the pain of your initial abandoment. It would be one thing if you were just a guy with a high sex drive but based on the large amounts of literature you dedicated and heck even publishing a book on seducing and another on you purusing the act of seducing I am making the conclusion you are an addict and need treatment.

    You need something else to define you. Not to knock your game but even with your success I can safely assume out of the top 1000 womanizers in the history of the world you don’t come in at #990. Start writing like Hemingway (who wrote about other stuff beside fucking) and maybe your life can be salvaged…otherwise you will continue down a path that most normal people got over when they were teenagers in high school.

  • Miles Davis

    105 AlphaXalpha: “Your choice of words makes you sound like a homosexual.”

    Roosh is there any way you can keep the fat lesbian trolls off this board?

  • Eric

    Though movies aren’t real life, they depict them in many cases, and sometimes do a good job. With that said, this is like in Scarface when after he gets everything he wants – the girl, the money, the power – he says

    “is this it? eating, drinking, fucking, snorting, and then what?”

    when you’ve got what you want, and it gets boring, i guess it’s time to find something else you want. if only it was that easy, ecspecially when the thing you got was girls – which is something guys spend their lives trying to figure out how to get. I suggest trying to find out the way to become rich, after that, i don’t know

  • Keith Richards

    “the almighty stinkbox”

    stinkbox?

  • rubia

    this post made me feel sorry for you, and it made me want to make you feel better. so, depressed game? i think you could use your funk… to get yourself out of your funk.

  • Anonymous

    lol @ “estrogen filled drama queen” :) )) Maybe that’s why he can’t build any muscle – no testosterone.

    ———————————–
    He has got to have some testosterone with those hairy gorilla arms of his…

    ————-

    Maybe excessive testosterone is why he has to run around trying to stick it inside everything that moves: hoes, hookers, sheep. Lack of muscles due to alcohol and coke probably.

  • http://eveslibrary.wordpress.com/ V

    They say that those who are depressed see themselves the most accurately. Perhaps with adoption of a more “accurate” world view depression is then set to follow. Believing that woman are Godesses is a silly fancy, but when not frustrated it is a nice one.

    V’s last blog post: Vasafaxa vs. The Herb.

  • Bravo

    Just breathe.

  • Anon

    “Unless youâ��re lucky like Hugh Hefner, whoâ��s looking pretty frail these days, old age is no joy ride, regardless of how healthy you can keep yourself.”

    Jack Lalane comes to my mind — he is in his 90s and is probably the healthiest man walking the planet, but his diet and exercise regiment is quite extreme and has been for many many years.

    There is gossip about Hefner literally needing a lot of Viagra and God only knows what while he is fucking, and also his “girlfriends” are sucking the dust from his cock because of the $$$$ and nothing more. I suspect too that Hef also felt at some point in his life if not more than once the way you did because with regards to access to hot skanks, he always got what he wanted.

  • Anon

    “Unless you’re lucky like Hugh Hefner, who’s looking pretty frail these days, old age is no joy ride, regardless of how healthy you can keep yourself.”

    Jack Lalane comes to my mind — he is in his 90s and is probably the healthiest man walking the planet, but his diet and exercise regiment is quite extreme and has been for many many years.

    There is gossip about Hefner literally needing a lot of erection enhancement drugs and God only knows what while he is fucking, and also his “girlfriends” are sucking the dust from his cock because of the $$$$ and nothing more. I suspect too that Hef also felt at some point in his life if not more than once the way you did because with regards to access to hot skanks, he always got what he wanted.

  • AlphaXalpha

    113

    Jack Lalane is not human. I saw an interview of him on youtube on his 96th birthday, and he was sharp and vital.

    About Hefner, he’s sort of a sad case. His first wife cheated on him, and it deeply affected him psychologically, so he decided to just bang sluts for the rest of his life as he was scared of getting deceived again.

  • http://www.chicnoirhouse.blogspot.com chic noir

    Damn this is a good post roosh. Must give you props.

    I like this post so much I got a case of the gina tingles :bow:

    Lately I’m having some morbid thoughts. I do a lot of healthy things so that I can live a nice long life, but now I’m questioning that. People are running marathons twice a year so they can live until 85 instead of 70. But what are you going to do after 70?

    cosign cosign cosign
    I so feel this way too. I watch these financial planners on TV trying to convince people to live in a one room shack with 10 roommates & eat ramen so they can save every single penny until 70 years old.

    It’s important to enjoy the now, while you’re young. You can’t enjoy Europe, Africa or South America at 70 in the same way that you can at 25. Just ain’t gonna happen. Even the most in shape 80 year old can’t compare to the average 25 year old.

    chic noir’s last blog post: The Personifacation of Elegance.

  • http://www.chicnoirhouse.blogspot.com chic noir

    chris Second, it does seem like you need to go deeper instead of wider, when it comes to women.

    written like a true brother :)

    chic noir’s last blog post: The Personifacation of Elegance.

  • http://www.chicnoirhouse.blogspot.com chic noir

    while getting older is scary when you�re young, lots of older people are actually pretty happy

    Wait until Viagra, ben gay and epson salt are discontinued, we�ll see whose happy then.

    chic noir’s last blog post: The Personifacation of Elegance.

  • http://www.chicnoirhouse.blogspot.com chic noir

    while getting older is scary when you’re young, lots of older people are actually pretty happy

    Wait until viga*a, ben gay and epson salt are discontinued, we’ll see whose happy then.

    chic noir’s last blog post: The Personifacation of Elegance.

  • Anonymous

    @59….read the book mate, just cause the guy dont look like Anthony “Cheeseball” Robins doesnt mean it aint good. Actually not that much to do with gaming and i have long ago stopped sarging etc. I am not a hippy new agist but this is pretty good.
    Ever seen Salmon Rushdie? Seen the pussy he pulls?

  • Anonymous

    Dude…dark post, we all hit those spots. Here is what I read lately when I need a boot in the ass:
    http://www.rooshv.com/just-keep-going

  • John

    I suggest you leave a note and shut down your blog for a month or so. And stop chasing ass too.

    In fact, stop doing everything you’ve been used to do and do other things. Or do nothing at all for a while. Spend time with your family, talk with them about any issue you always wanted to talk about.

    Then decide what you are going to do with your life.

    If I were you, I’d treat Game-Seduction-Dating as a serious job and expand it into a business, David De Angelo style. You’ve built a solid foundation for that. I’d write a few more books, maybe Bang II, one about Colombia, one about Brazil and one about Europe for Americans (do the research trip).
    Offer seminars wherever you happen to be. Maybe sell an instructional DVD (get a more mainstream appearance for that). Spend the next 5 years travelling the world and building a solid, passive income business,
    then after that decide what to do next. Maybe settle down and get kids and do something else.

    Or leave the game business behind to do something completely different, right now.

    You are actually in a very privileged position, getting semi-passive income from location-independent work.

    From now on, treat Game as a serious business, or else get out of it.

    All the best!

  • John

    “I know I only have 30 good years at the most, and I have already used up a third of that.”

    Wrong. That’s the typical American consumerist mindset. “Good years” for what? Banging chicks? You’re already doing that and quite well by the way. Traveling? You’re doing that. Higher income? You can give it a shot if you really want that. Some people need goals in their life to be happy. Get new goals and committ to them.

    You have already mastered Game and there is no point in fooling around with this anymore except if it is to be about raking in big $$$. Or keep it as a hobby but then make a commitment to bang only 9 and 10′s and celebrities for the rest of your life. Take a challenge.

    You may have mastered sex and seduction, but from what you say you still may have issues with love and deeper, long-term relationships. Maybe that’s an angle you could work on for a while.

    Don’t blame the girls for having you rejected in younger years. It was your mindset and behavior that scared them off.

    Women are not our enemies. lol

    Seems like you’re just going through a mild depression or sort of midlife crisis. Lay back, take it easy and don’t fall for the toxic pills that are so common in America today (Prozac et al).

    All the best!

  • Anonymous

    Roosh,

    This a war for your soul.

    The forces of darkness, vanquished long ago on calvary are clinging, attempting to drag every last soul into their desolate pits.

    Depression and lethargy are normal phases of human emotion in a regular life cycle. But dark forces try to exacerbate those, fanning the frigid flames of despair, until they seem so overwhelming, terrifying, numbing.

    Flee. Leave the place you are at. Leave the country if possible. Come to Jesus. Repent of your sins.

    Today it seems numb. If this continues tomorrow it will seem hopeless.

    Man can not live without hope. Satan will wish to cement his gains through tempts of suicide, ODs, etc.

    Run to Jesus Christ. Get to a confessional. Your immortal soul is at stake.

  • http://alpharivelino.wordpress.com/ Rivelino

    Fantastic post Roosh, I think your best writing is the pensive, introspective, socially critical, stream of consciousness ruminations on life.

    You are like me, only much better. We both like to achieve, to learn, to accomplish. You have mastered game, and so you are feel philosophical and existential. I have an idea:

    Pick up digital photography.

    It is a fantastic, accessible art form that will pay off major dividends with the babes. Combining a decent knowledge of photography with your mastery of game, you could end up banging some serious 9.5s and 10s, girls that I doubt you have banged up to now. They are there. I lived in Manhattan for ten years, and you will not believe the sheer quantity of drop-dead gorgeous girls running around the city.

    Plus, after all is said and done, you could write a book on Photography Game. That is the type of game I am thinking of developing.

    Rivelino’s last blog post: Thank you, Master.

  • RumGuzzlr

    http://www.rooshv.com/my-philosophy-on-life

    Read your on post, roosh. Especially the part about “Empty”.

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