How To Pickup Ukrainian Girls In The Club

The following is an excerpt from Bang Ukraine

Ukraine caused me to revise my theories about wanting to be in countries with a high female to male ratio. In Poland, the ratio was much worse (often at one girl for every three guys), but I picked up much easier. I learned that ratio is only one factor to consider when determining if a city is good or not. Being able to communicate fluently in a common language is surprisingly much more important than being surrounded by boatloads of women.

The style of night game you should implement is what I call “Weekend at Bernie’s game” or just “Bernie game” for short.

Weekend at Bernie’s is a wildly popular American movie where the main character, Bernie, a businessman, dies an untimely death. To keep up appearances and avoid getting in trouble, his two goofy underlings make it seem like Bernie is still alive by giving him sunglasses and manipulating his movements as if they’re controlling a puppet. On a beach resort they ended up making Bernie look like the life of the party. While dead, Bernie makes many friends and even hooks up with a pretty girl. In the sequel, which I believe was a box office smash, Bernie is brought back to life using a voodoo spell where he performs a strange tribal dance with his chest puffed out.

In Ukraine, the girl is Bernie. I want you to pretend she’s dead and that only you have the shaman power to make her undead. Follow these four steps:

1. Do most of the talking (at least 90%). She will give short responses that do not at all help you continue the conversation. Silence will be standard. It will seem like she has passed into the netherworld, but as long as her body is still there (i.e., she doesn’t walk away), you’re doing fine and should talk about anything that comes to your mind. Some silence on your part is okay, but too much silence and she may reanimate and walk away into the arms of another guy.

2. Touch early and often. Do you remember the scene in The Matrix where Trinity brought Neo back to life by declaring her love for him? Well you’re going to bring the Ukrainian Bernie back to life by touching her a lot. Start touching her arms, her back, her hips, and—once you’re on the dancefloor—her ass. Words will not reanimate Bernie, only touching. I’m convinced touch is the main way that a Ukrainian girl gets attracted to a man. Just understand that while doing this, she will not touch you back. As long as she’s still with you, however, you’re doing fine.

3a. When you run out of conversation (and this will definitely happen because of how little she gives you), suggest a dance. There actually should be less suggesting and more demanding. The girls are so averse to giving direct “Yes” answers that you have to constantly be leading the interaction. If any of your game moves are dependent on a Ukrainian girl saying “Yes,” they will not work.

To start the dance you can put your hand on her back and say “Let’s go dance” or pull her hand towards the dance floor. Once you get a look at how guys run their aggressive Bernie game, you’ll probably feel very passive and slow. Assume the “Yes” and proceed from there.

3b. Sometimes it’ll be a better idea to drink before dancing, especially if the music is crappy and she’s not yet in a dancing mood. After a ten minute conversation with her, once she’s shown her interest in standing next to you and listening to whatever ramble you’ve mustered up, ask her what she likes to drink and then make a move to the bartender to get it (unless she gives you a clear “No”). It’s generally a bad sign when a girl refuses a free drink from you because that’s her way of saying, “I don’t want to owe you a damn thing.” If a girl turns you down to both drink and dance, she’s probably going to walk away from you shortly. If she accepts both of your offers within the first 30 minutes or so, you’re doing great.

4. Attempt to kiss Bernie. It’s more important that you attempt the kiss than actually get it. This is because you want to establish a sexual frame to make it clear that friendship is not on the table. You don’t want to realize on the first date that you’re in the friend zone when you hoped to be in the fuck zone. I must say that I’ve never been friend zoned so much as in Ukraine,  basically because my sexual intent was too weak early in the interaction.

If you liked this excerpt then you’ll like Bang Ukraine, my 103-page book that teaches you how to sleep with Ukrainian women during a visit to the country. It contains tourist tips, game advice, and sex stories that give you all the information you need to bang hyper-feminine Ukrainian women, with extra details not released on the blog. Click here to learn more about the book.

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