Jersey Shore is a brilliant anthropological look at modern game because it puts together a bunch of shallow, horny people who love to go out and hook up. Compare this to the typical Real World snoozefest where you have more “balanced” characters like the emo doofus who couldn’t pick up a girl if his life depended on it and the angry black man who is more interested in debating than getting laid.

I would like to rate the game of the four guys who are on the show, from worst to best.

4. Vinny

This guy added very little value. No one hated him, no one loved him, and he merely existed to make an occasional comment that got token laughter, feeding off the others instead of getting his own vibe pushed into the storyline. His energy wasn’t bad and I actually didn’t mind his fist pumps in the club but he never seemed to make a play on any decent girl. The first girl he hooked up with was his boss’ girl and then he tried to go for his roommate’s sister. This is what guys with no game do—shit where they eat. And then his Atlantic City bitch gets embarrassingly ganked by Mike, who shouldn’t be faulted for it because he knew like I knew that Vinny had zero hope of sealing the deal. His main purpose is to fill up space.

Bottom Line: Vinny has no game. He needs to take a workshop or something, but then again he’s only 21. I’m sure he’ll be fine in a few years.

3. Ronnie

Ronnie was almost as boring as Vinny. He lacked Mike’s charm and wit and was always logical, complaining about nonsense or calling out someone for trivial matters instead of playing the diplomat. His cackle laugh is obnoxious and fake but he does have the ability to crack a decent joke every now and then. The basic strategy of his game is to show up looking “fresh,” do that crunk dance he learned from watching Rize, and then not open his mouth too much.

Most of the work in getting laid for him is indeed his muscles and hair. This was obvious when Sammi repeatedly said how “hot” he was, and initially with her it wasn’t his personality that did the heavy lifting. His energy in the club is good with his dance moves and because he’s laid back without showing too much interest I’m pretty sure he has banged a few girls in the past.

Unfortunately there is heavy degradation to his game once he gets into a relationship. He kept saying gag-on-a-spoon things stitched together from bad movies like, “I thought the shore was the best thing to happen to me….. but you are,” and “I don’t know what it is about you, but I could kiss you all day.” But since these dumb lines come after sex, I wonder how much it really affects his pussy-getting ability.

Even though I’m sure Ronnie would demolish me in a fight, he came across as a needy little bitch, chasing around Sammi who’s only somewhat decent after fixing herself up for three hours. She had the ham arms, a lackluster buddy, and the most annoying personality on the show.

Bottom Line: His game is only looks, and with that he can only get stupid girls who are less pretty than he is handsome.

2. Pauly D

Pauly has the elements of tight game simmering somewhere underneath. There is no reason he shouldn’t pull every night but frankly he was unable to live up to his potential. He needs to look alive, lower his standards a bit, and approach more instead of waiting for Mike to get shit going. In fact for most of the show he basically rode Mike’s coattails. Otherwise he’s cool, aloof, knows how to dance, has interesting hobbies to bring up in conversation, and is cocky but not too cocky where it borders on caricature like Mike. These selected Pauly quotes reveal that his mind is in the right place:

“I’m just trying to roll with it.”

“I have a game plan… I don’t want to waste my time.”

“My girl was fucking busted… I was just trying to go with the flow.”

His constant talk about high standards is probably bullshit because he did put in a significant amount of time into the Israeli girl who was mediocre at best. I find that guys who constantly harp on standards usually use it as an excuse to not approach, as you always see them later with average girls. Mike has lower standards but with the sheer quantity of girls he’s getting with it’s a guarantee that a hot girl will slip into the rotation every now and then.

One important thing Pauly needs to do is be more persistent. He had J-Wow on his bed peeping at his cock but he didn’t even try to get her shirt off or play with her boobs. I know she had a boyfriend at the time and probably wouldn’t fuck them that night, but his chill vibe may be a little too chill, and he needs to give a damn when it’s time to close the deal.

Bottom Line: Pauly has the right mindset and some good moves but he needs to step up in order to realize his true potential.

1. Mike “The Situation”

You gotta admit that Mike has personality and charm. Sure he’s cheesy and over-the-top, but behind his outrageous cockiness there is a wink and a nod that it’s a tough guy act and he’s an alright cat behind that. Now while he is very good at building attraction, it’s obvious that he has a tough time closing the deal. One of the reasons it that he was way too obsessed with that fucking jacuzzi. Bro you use the jacuzzi to get them to your house but once there say it’s broken. Man has gotten laid well before the jacuzzi and will continue to do so if jacuzzis cease to exist. There was also the big late-game mistake he made when he ordered greasy pizza with the sluts he brought home, an amateur move usually played by guys who just graduated from college.

For some reason he counts his chickens before they hatch, having a “I’ll fuck her when I want” mindset that obviously doesn’t work. Still, I think he has the right attitude with girls that he just wants to sleep with as he even admitted many times that it’s a numbers game. He probably did get rejected the most on the show (let’s give him a pass on that embarrassing bitterness business with Sammi), but then again he kissed the most girls and had the most bangs. In the end it’s the results that matter as there are no style points in fucking.

The fact that he banged that cute girl raw dog in the jacuzzi should leave no doubt that he’s a true player. Gotta get that notch no matter what!

Bottom Line: Mike is charismatic, fun, and has the right game mindset, though he could tighten up his deal-sealing technique. Despite his gay stripper vibe he was the most consistent and therefore has the best game.

Note how the guys had a “whatever” attitude towards phone numbers. They’re all about the same night and if you want to fuck a lot of girls then that’s how it’s done.

One of the reasons I enjoyed this show is because it reminded me of how Virgle Kent and I run game in D.C. While the background and people are different, the elements are the same: same-night pulls, grenade jumping, street game, muscles, random make-outs, alcohol-fueled drama, fights, stalking, cockblocking, and so on. I especially enjoyed the scenes where the guys extracted girls back to the house because it’s there I could identify a lot of mistakes they were making when it came time to close, a couple of which I mentioned above.

In a bar you can have a dozen girls thinking about banging you but if you don’t have a plan to ease just one away from the friends into a bedroom then you won’t get a lot of bangs. The first part of learning game is about building attraction, but then you have to master logistics, of being persistent and cool in herding her to the bedroom. Otherwise you’ll just have a stack of phone numbers.

For the most part the guys on the show have the attraction part nailed, but it’s the logistics that cost them quite a few notches. Divide and conquer, isolate and bang. When building attraction becomes automatic for you, the game becomes one of timing and logistics.

P.S. If you liked this post then I think you will like my book Bang, a collection of simple but powerful techniques, moves, and lines that make it easier for the average 20-something man to be more successful with women. Topics in Bang include discussion of the alpha male, effective opening lines, conversation themes, getting phone numbers, detailed dating strategy, and much more.

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Funny. Nice work. I’d imagine this post will spike traffic dramatically for a few days.

Loved the post. That show was unbelievable.
Interesting the part about Vinnie shitting where he eats. Good point in that guys like that aren’t confident enough to make their own way.

Amen Brother!

I like this show…not yet seen on mtv in The Netherlands…I took a quick bit at first episodes..I see a lot muscles, gelproducts and tanningshit going..What happened to the real caveman???

I think Mike is a perfect example of pussy begetting more pussy. The fact that he hit on anything and everything in plain view, for all to see did nothing but get him more. This runs counter to what most guys think. They think that if word gets out about how many chicks they’re banging that girls will find out and they will be “red flagged”. Wrong. Every chick out there now that is claiming that “he aint all that” and that “he couldn’t get with me” is chomping at the bit to get a piece of him.

As for Pauly, I like the way he played it. He knew that having a skill such as DJ’ing would give him the most staying power after the show. Now I hear that the guy is playing top knotch clubs in Vegas to a room full of the hottest chicks in the city. Well played sir.

I’d have to disagree on the 3 & 4.

To me Ronnie just turned into a real supplicating beta and you could tell he wouldn’t get a girl like Sammi (dime a dozen) in the Bronx.

She starts yapping away and gets him into a fight? He apologizes.

They’re joking around and he makes fun of her big toe. She cries? He apologizes.

Vinny and Pauly D are closer in personality and demeanor but PD has more game. So I would have them as 3 & 2 respectively; although, PD could be #1 and “The Sitch” at 2 given that we only get what MTV wanted us to see (and they want us to see drama – which is something “The Sitch” brought).

Another great post. The Jersey Shore reinforced just how much of a numbers game it is out there. These guys were being followed by a camera crew, yet still had to make a shit load of approaches in order to pull.

Gotta agree with you for the most part. I also thought all of the guys were beta except Mike… It seemed like he was the only one with the balls to approach. But the rest of the guys were very young so they just need to learn some game.

I blame you for telling me about this show and then I proceeded to watch the whole season like a crack fiend, terrible but somehow I couldn’t turn my TV off.

“In the end it’s the results that matter as there are no style points in fucking. ”

– Damn. Nail on the head. Wow. logistics are the hardest part b/c of the variables beyond control, and whether or not you’ve built enough attraction/comfort to supercede those.

TAllagash’s last blog post: Momma’s Boy Awakening.

Dear Jesus, my name will forever be tied with Jersey Shore on the internets.

But let the record show that Pauly D used my “whip the dick out” move!

Great post, Roosh.

I’m forwarding this to all of my friends.

Yo the cockblocks that happened were some of the most hilarious moments.

Basically their game = GTL

My impression (never watched) was the show was about pointing and laughing at low-IQ white trash. Roosh’s enthusiasm for the characters, um, “raises questions” for me.

Still waiting for roosh to review “up in the air”

Wassup with that Snookiegirl? WTF disgusting…Insane in the Membrane

Good review. Mike “The Situation” has my vote for the most balls and best attitude. It IS a numbers game, but the odds get better as you get better.

Haha… You have alcohol fueled drama and fights when you go out with Virgil?

Your the man Roosh,
but thats pretty funny…:)

I have been thinking of you every time they show gaming. Love your analysis – I figured you’d pick the Situation as #1.

“I find that guys who constantly harp on standards usually use it as an excuse to not approach, as you always see them later with average girls.”

True Statement.

- MPM

The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Alberto Tomba: Old-School Italian G.

hey roosh

you mentioned that mike had raw dog sex with a girl in the jacuzzi. which episode was that??? i dont remember it

I love this post. I grew up “down the shore” and have been to every bar and club they showed on Jersey Shore. I even know where they’re house is. Too funny. Good job Roosh!

I’ve never seen that show before, but now after your assessment of it, I’m somewhat curious. I might have to check out a few episodes.

Willy Wonka’s last blog post: Practicing Approaching.

that bitch angelina was so annoying cockblocking everyone and when she decides to fuck around she pretends like it didn’t happen.

typical women logic.

Hmm. I bet the Mike character has the biggest shlong. And I bet the successful “game” players all have bigger than average dicks. It might not be all about dick size, but most of the “cocky” guys who score lots of chicks are confident because they are well endowed. Little dick = low confidence; more emphasis on “building a relationship” with a girl; and more social inhibitions. Biology is 90% destiny.

this and your previous post are so, so good. i want to show them to my mother when she asks what i’ve been doing with my life. though, i don’t yet have the heart.

hank rearden:
“Biology is 90% destiny.”

africa and haiti disagree.

i thought this was a cool blog, and check the posts every few days, but critiquing jesrsy shore is a real blow to you credibility.

I just watched Episode 1 on my computer because you got me interested by this post.
The guys are decent fun boys, but the girls – oh my god… What a bunch of rude, bitchy, swearing, sloppy, stupid, and only marginally attractive whores. Anyone who marries an American girl is screwed. Unless she is of the rare girl-next-door type (red book endangered species, I think).
Glad I don’t live in the States anymore. Even when I did (6 years in DC) I dated 90% foreign girls – Russian, Czech, Bulgarian, Korean… Girls like these on the show are indeed only good for one pump and dump.

Roosh,

Throw away the television!

[...] Roosh – “Anti-Flake Defense Move for Flaky College Girls“, “Definitive Guide to Going Out Alone (aka Flying Solo)“, “The Guido With the Best Game on Jersey Shore” [...]

Dear Roosh,

Please take a long hard look at the mirror and then honestly assess your own performance, where you are in life and where you are going. That would be a more beneficial post.

It’s better to do it sooner than later b/c years will go by whether you do anything about it or not, and those questions will hit you over the head one way or the other.

ey roosh did you see the before the shore episode? it was the one after the reunion. really funny shit.

at the end is were it gets hilarious.
“we had this huge elephant girl in our house and it took two of us to get her out” -pauly d