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Player Wake-Up Call

Every now and then a player needs a wake-up call to remind him of what it takes to win at the game. He needs a rude awakening that should never have happened.

While alone I approached two 20-year-old Croatian girls sitting on a bench outside of a Zagreb club. After an hour-long chat, they invited me to come with them inside. I took a liking to the thinner one. She told me how she never meets people who speaks English, and how she would love to practice with me.

We walked into the club and I bought a round of drinks. They asked me to dance with them and I agreed. We danced in one of those lame circles and I didn’t even touch the girl I liked. I wasn’t concerned because I had already decided that Croatian guys couldn’t spit game, meaning I had my girl on lock for the night.

After fifteen minutes, I wasn’t in the mood to dance anymore. I told them I’d be at the bar. My girl said, “We’ll dance for a little bit longer and I’ll come find you.” I ordered a drink and checked out the talent, but there weren’t many opportunities. After twenty minutes passed, I got a bad feeling. I looked around and saw her dancing with a guy. I positioned myself to get a better look. He was just a kid, no older than 22, but he was aggressive. I stared, pathetically, until I finally saw them making out hard while he squeezed her ass.

It seemed that everyone was looking at me, even though nobody was. I felt a burn in my chest. The pain turned to anger and then self-loathing. Defeatist thoughts rubbed salt and pepper on my wound. You stupid, fucking idiot. A lifetime of earned confidence was sucked away in a flash.

I know that the difference between a winner and a loser is that the winner keeps going. He doesn’t let the transient feelings of anger and frustration determine who he is. He understands that he is human and will hesitate and make mistakes. I kept going that night, but I didn’t pull. I tried and failed, and that’s okay, because the next night I went out, I was prepared to dance for hours. I was ready to work.

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45 Comments »
October 19th, 2012 @ 9:08 am

Ouch. 20 minutes was obviously a bit too long for her when she was drunk and horny. Even the best among us still need to recalibrate. Sounds like you did exactly that the next night Roosh.

October 19th, 2012 @ 9:21 am

Thanks I’d rather learn from your mistakes then mine. :P

October 19th, 2012 @ 9:26 am

Fuuuuck! I hate when that shit happens. People don’t realize that even the best in the game have off nights. Sounds like you had one of those. It’s always refreshing to read about the failures along with the successes. It reminds us all that you’re still just normal dude like the rest of us. Play on playa.

4 Anonymous
October 19th, 2012 @ 9:30 am

There’s a great phrase that Will Smith said in one of his interviews which stuck with me ever since…

“When someones out there messing around and goofing off, there is also someone out there working hard, relentlessly improving his craft…”

There seems to be a phase right now of whining betas bitching and complaining about how life is unfair and how they’re a failure with women…

Most of them simply need to grow a pair of balls and be willing to fail and fail loads…

This year, i’ve failed more times than i ever have in my entire life. But i’ve also haven’t grown as quick as i have. I’ve become a better man in the process…

I think the more this gets engrained in the community, the better off we’re all going to becomes as a gender.

5 BB
October 19th, 2012 @ 9:59 am

Dude, you’re just getting older. And I bet neither of them would have given you the time of day if you weren’t a native English speaker… Do you factor this in when abroad?

6 Therapsid
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:06 am

@BB You’re delusional. Does the idea of a 33 year old dude picking up 20 year old chicks shock you? Get out some more.

7 Dark Wolf
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:09 am

I am almost 40 but in great shape. (weightlifting and martial arts) . Going through a grinding dry spell though. I do not like clubbing or drinking / bars. I also feel a a bit shackled due to age and seeing a lot younger chicks everywhere. Any wake up call for me? Any advice?

8 RobP
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:09 am

The Game can indeed be a harah mistress. But it beats the alternative . . . .

9 RobP
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:09 am

harsh

10 Anonymous
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:13 am

@Dark Wolf – You can in fact get a girl any age with good Game. The fact that you’re also fit and healthy also adds points to your overall attractive qualities…

I would say get out there and tear it up.

11 BB
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:28 am

@ therapsid

I’m all right with older dudes flirting with young girls. It’s just that as you age you have to adjust your game according to your age. Same targets, different approach.

October 19th, 2012 @ 10:30 am

@DarkWolf maybe Day Game? As a 40 yr old myself, I find it more congruent with my lifestyle.

Roosh has a solid book on it…

PS. Age is only a barrier if you think it is.

13 Santiago solari
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:50 am

Damn, I’m just an intermediate level player and I tend to question my skills upon encountering failure, but it’s humbling to know even a vet like you is not completely immune to failure.

14 Johnny Guitar
October 19th, 2012 @ 11:29 am

Dance for hours, Roosh? No fucking way man. Seriously, you saw with your own eyes what that one guy did in only 22 minutes. And you answered your own question in what you didn’t do right… not being aggressive enough.

15 Johnny Guitar
October 19th, 2012 @ 11:32 am

my bad, 20 minutes. My reading comp is shit today. hehe.

16 madmax
October 19th, 2012 @ 11:55 am

man, that’s why I admire you. Because of your honest writing. You don’t try to hide the ‘failures’, and that makes me feel strong when I myself fail.

The truth is: it’s normal. You know better than anyone that game is not really linear most of the times. Too many variables.

Was the aggressive guy good looking?

No matter what, hats off to you for sharing this insightful story. Don’t feel bad, that guy didn’t fuck women from all over Europe and beyond ;)

17 Brandon
October 19th, 2012 @ 12:03 pm

Even the pros stumble, but this is nothing. I’ve been straight robbed plenty of times. That shit stings the hardest IMO.

18 PDX
October 19th, 2012 @ 1:04 pm

“I know that the difference between a winner and a loser is that the winner keeps going.”

Kind of like being outcome independent? ;)

19 Jay
October 19th, 2012 @ 1:14 pm

Yea I hear ya dude, a good wake up call indeed. A certain ruthlessness is needed in this game in order to be continually successful, regardless of past conquests.

October 19th, 2012 @ 2:00 pm

I had one of those a couple a months ago in Amsterdam. I had a cutie blond German girl vibing me all day, but I was to chill in the club and she got scooped up by a slimy English dude who looked like he was 12.

My bad. It stung as I was trying to figure out if I could recoup the loss since I already had it locked from before, but too late as he went for the kill. Always better to error on the side of aggressive, although as I get older, and dont give a shit about one pull, that line can be hard to walk.

I think the the best remedy is two shots at the bar and either jump on a set quick or venue change to get your head straight.

Turner

October 19th, 2012 @ 2:01 pm

and then two shots:)

22 DAP
October 19th, 2012 @ 2:17 pm

Personally I think on that particular night, Roosh was just a victim of his own past successes with foreign women. He has been so successful in the past to the point where I think he just got lazy and complacent that night. It happens sometimes. Sometimes you can be so use to winning to the point where you can get a little lazy and underestimate the competition to your detriment.

23 DAP
October 19th, 2012 @ 2:21 pm

Roosh just fell asleep at the driver’s seat on that particular night. That guy did to Roosh what Roosh does to guys night after night. Sometimes LeBron James gets dunked on to.

24 Anonymous
October 19th, 2012 @ 2:55 pm

@Turner – I think the biggest mistake you made was taking your girl to a club.

It’s like taking a Lioness into a Lion’s Den. Why make it harder on yourself?

Either take her to a quiet bar and have a few drinks or bounce back to yours or hers and seal the deal… Problem solved

25 Todd
October 19th, 2012 @ 3:33 pm

We’ve all had player fatigue which is common if you’re not on point any given night out where everything is going good and suddenly you lose state/energy/desire. It’s like suddenly you’re like screw it, and don’t want to do anymore work that night. At that point you can just grab a fatty and chill.

Good thing to battle player fatigue is keep Testosterone high, eat healthy, hydrated, and take B-Complex vitamins that contain C & Zinc. Your ass will be on the dance floor all night owning shit son.

October 19th, 2012 @ 3:58 pm

I saw Joe Mauer take a swing at a ball.

He missed.

He somehow didn’t commit suicide after that and managed to get through.

/sacr

Come on Roosh, don’t get so down. Nobody bats 1000. I’m sure if I went back to the bar scene I’d been getting shot down like a rusty German Messerschmit in 1945.

27 Cad and Bounder
October 19th, 2012 @ 7:31 pm

Its hard to tell from this article whether this girl would have closed or not or whether this is the usual ‘get a guy to buy us drinks’ routine that you get from many girls from and in Eastern Europe. In fact i’ve often thought it would be a laugh to get a t-shirt with ‘buy me drink’ printed on it in cyrillic script. It would certainly get you chatting with russian chicks in London.

But I digress. The guy could have been her boyfriend, a guy she shagged before or whatever. The real question is whether buying them drinks is a good idea? Like roosh (darius?) I come from middle eastern origins and its culturally ingrained with us to be gracious with women on these issues. However I dont think it is a good idea unless its a pre-arranged date and even then its questionable. I get more pissed when I buy drinks and it doesnt close because I lost value in her eyes by being too nice.

I had a recnt episode on this subject. In eastern europe am on the bar. A cute, funky chick comes up, afe wword in haltering english and then she comes back to me and starts saying ‘pina colada, pina colada’ I retort ‘what, what. Penis piranha?? You are a penis piranha??’ her english isnt good enough to understand. At which point I thought , nope, we both know we cant communicate so closing will be v tough. Her friend(better english) comes over and says ‘buy her a drink, she likes you etc’. I conclude that this is just a silly little girl going through some rite of passage and playing games by getting a foreigner to buy her a drink.

Theen again i’ll never know.

October 19th, 2012 @ 7:42 pm

Roosh, there is always gng to be a guy who is better looking, a better dancer, and who has a longer shlong. Don’t worry about it and move on to the next bitch…

You should have talked to a different girl right in front of her….

http://thecaptainpower.blogspot.com/2012/10/only-poor-people-sleep.html

29 Jerome
October 19th, 2012 @ 8:40 pm

Keeping it real….Ive been there….Thanks for sharing….

The reality is girls live in abundance of cock….

In a flash we can lose them….because they have so much option….while there young:)

30 SadieB
October 19th, 2012 @ 9:31 pm

You lost the game because you don’t care about the prize. Try risking something next time..like your feelings. You’re a Persian guy, right? So I know you can bask in misery with the best! You’re not living up to your potential here.

October 19th, 2012 @ 9:56 pm

It’s heartening to know that even the treats can have feet of clay.
Also, Brits and Aussies have been hitting up Croatia hardcore for about five years now. If a Croatian woman tells you that she rarely meets English speakers, it’s code for “Buy me a drink and talk to me pretty and I’ll fuck you until your cock falls off. Or, just talk to me pretty if I’m already drunk”

32 Stuki
October 19th, 2012 @ 10:54 pm

Croatian guys lacking game???? Compared to a literal pro, perhaps; but non Muslim former Yugoslavia is probably the most natural dense environment anywhere, aside perhaps from communities heavy in African ancestry.

By any Western and Asian standards, Yugos peg every meter for aggressiveness, ambition and cockiness.

33 Anonymous
October 20th, 2012 @ 4:24 am

I’d have taken her to the bar, if only to order a drink for myself. The key lesson here is to move on, not giving up. What we most forget is that there are loads of pussy out there, way to much to handle!

34 Alf
October 20th, 2012 @ 7:57 am

Christ almighty what do you expect from a female? They’re nothing more then retarded children. And this all happening at a nightclub.

35 gaius
October 20th, 2012 @ 9:21 am

Hey Roosh

The next time you’re in a similar situation you wont make the same mistake. Valuable lesson!

36 Line Wolf
October 20th, 2012 @ 11:23 am

One thing that is difficult – no matter how stoked you are to game girls and in the mood – is getting in a mood (not frame of mind per se) that matches the girl ur hittin on and staying in that mood when lame activities intervene.

Unfortunately, a circle dance can kill the kino and can slow the elevation of attraction

Bet ur ass that 22 tr. old guy was scoping that girl for at least 10 minutes, watched the whole thing unfold, and dove in for the swoop.

Its a jungle out there ~

37 Stephen
October 20th, 2012 @ 4:24 pm

Look at Casanova… later in his life… he got beaten in his game by 18 year old girl! Just take on your punch and learn from it. It’s a blessing in disguise and see as another lesson for you to learn and grow.

38 Anonymous
October 20th, 2012 @ 5:13 pm

Roosh,

So where are you going next?

39 Ari
October 20th, 2012 @ 5:19 pm

This story should give lazy betas a lesson in reality.

40 Andrew
October 20th, 2012 @ 7:12 pm

Roosh,

This post relates directly to something that happened to me recently. I got dumped by a girl who I fell in love with in Peru. It was my first true heart break, and the worst part about it was it was my fault entirely. After reading this post, I’ve decided to get back on the game horse and crush it tonight. Thanks for the motivation.

I also want to thank you for introducing me to the manosphere. I am a 22 y/o 6’2″ white guy who just entered one of the elite special operation branches in the US military; thus, I have no problem attracting girls. Yet, my confidence was at an almost beta level after breaking up with my girlfriend of 2 years and I was getting almost no lays due to lack of trying. You’ve inspired me to change my social habits completely. I had been a redpill believer in every other aspect of my life, yet your writing has given my social life a new dimension. I’m currently living near DC for the next few months, then I’ll be out in San Diego. Please contact me if you ever need any military connection or want some insider tips on fitness.

With much respect,
Andrew

41 Buitre
October 20th, 2012 @ 11:50 pm

Just happened to me a few days ago in a club in Manaus Brazil … Brazilian guys are extremely persistent. This girl had been flirting with me for a while and some guy was trying reallly hard to kiss her, she kept pushing him away all the time … then she got really close to me, I grabbed her without saying a word and we started making out passionately. I tried to strike fast by getting her horny and told her to come to a motel nearby with me… It seemed she was comming but first she went to talk to another girl for 5 mins or so and guess what? …

..You guessed right, a third local guy came into the picture really aggressive and this time she complied to him … yep, I went home empty handed … WTF!

42 Apocalypseman
October 21st, 2012 @ 12:15 am

I get this post and it’s funny people are acting like you’re down about this, not the point you are making obviously.

Maybe it’s just me but there’s just too many girls out there. I’ve let loads go to other guys and I just don’t care enough. Losing in sport or work gets to me, but losing an opportunity with a girl doesn’t seem to motivate me in the same way. Always another dozen around the corner. The sick thing is I’ve taken pleasure in rejecting women.

43 Victor Von Dizzle
October 22nd, 2012 @ 4:00 pm

@Buitre- Damn, what a slut! Forget about her, bro. Who knows what kind of horrors lurk in that landfill she calls a vagina?

44 AK
December 16th, 2012 @ 2:06 am

i needed this, because i was being a pussy lol. thanks, you are a legend man!

45 rabindranath
April 18th, 2013 @ 11:51 am

Lol Oh boohoo.

Seriously, a random girl at a random club you don’t even care for finds some other guy to make out with and your ‘confidence falters’. That’s hilarious.

Also, it confirms what I’ve always known about PUAs. All of them have low self esteem and try to make themselves feel better by manipulating women. Sad.

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