The Helsinki Diaries (Part 3 of 4)


The next day I was low on gas. My 32-year-old body was done after just two nights of partying, but I bought a couple cans of Red Bull and used that for fuel. During the day I managed a couple of approaches, but my heart wasn’t into it. Since I found a night spot that I knew I could get laid from, day game was no longer on the table. It would be better to conserve my energy.

The previous two nights I was out the door by 11:30, but on this night I was dragging. I didn’t leave until 12:30. I went back to the Millionaire Club.

I expected it to be more crowded than Tuesday and especially Wednesday, but it was nearly dead except for two girls at the bar. I approached the one nearest me and it turned out that she was Russian-born but moved to Finland when she was young, sort of like the Iranian girl. She was friendly and smiley, not at all stoic like I would’ve expected. She had a bit of Finnish flair with a colorful dress and gigantic red flower in her hair, but still retained the Russian sexiness.

She was touching me almost immediately, so I was debating whether to throw the Finnish flag under the bus yet again for a flag that I’ve had previous trouble capturing. The fact that I didn’t have my Russian flag after living in Washington DC, home to a huge Russian population, was embarrassing to me, but if I pursued her I would only have two nights left to smash something Finnish. With Millionaire providing so many opportunities, and the weekend yet to arrive, I believed I could take the risk. I wanted to try for three flags in one week.

The approach hit a snag because of her fat friend. She kept interrupting and wouldn’t shut up. Without a wingman (Jon was at a club down the street), I had to simultaneously entertain fattie while gaming my chick. The task wasn’t made any easier with the fattie trying to call me out: “It’s weird that you are alone” and “You should lose the beard, most girls don’t like it.”

I had a million comebacks to use but since I wanted to get laid I replied with witty niceties instead of telling her that a morbidly obese girl doesn’t have a right to criticize anyone. I looked around the club for a guy rolling solo like me so I could pin him on the fat girl, but there was nothing available.

The Russian girl then asked me if I wanted to go outside and smoke. And continue the three-way conversation with fattitude? I passed, safe in the knowledge that she would return back to me, especially since our faces got so close that we almost kissed. There weren’t many other guys around so I felt safe. I let them go smoke, saying that I was going to get a drink instead.

Twenty minutes later I notice them in another part of the bar. The Russian girl was not looking my way. Then three guys approached them, one of them eagerly going for the fattie. By not going out for a smoke, I fucked myself, even though just a couple months prior in Lithuania I had explicitly learned to go for a smoke with girls to keep the interaction going. There were no other girls to approach.

I comforted myself in thinking that the dude she was talking to had weak game, but I couldn’t exactly just go up to the new group of five. Of course the fattie was no longer cockblocking because she was getting attention. I had no choice but to let that scenario play out, since I wasn’t in a position to barge in and grab her away like she was my girlfriend. I decided to walk to Onnela, a club nearby that Jon texted me to say had girls.

The club wasn’t all bad but it was half empty and there weren’t many good opportunities. Jon was grinding on a Finnish-Indian girl. I did two approaches, got absolutely nowhere, then went outside. It was now 2:30, with only one hour left until the bars closed. I was exhausted, both physically and mentally, but I knew I had to soldier on. I walked back to Millionaire.

I was horrified to see the Russian girl grinding on the dude. I’m talking about a hands-on-the-floor, bent over, booty clapping kind of grind that left no doubt where that interaction was going. Apparently I had made a huge tactical error in assuming she would return, an error I seem to repeat. I was pissed because I like to think that I’m at the level where I don’t make such a nuclear mistake, but there she was, about to make out with this dude. I should have made that fat bitch at least earn the cockblock instead of withdrawing from the interaction voluntarily.

One of the hardest parts of being a player is controlling your state in the face of disappointment. If I let a situation like that put me in a sour mood, I wouldn’t be able to have the right energy to game other girls. For five minutes I talked to myself, saying that the mistake was already done and there was nothing more I could. The pain settled down enough to where I could calmly approach a blonde girl I saw looking around. She didn’t indulge my attempt so I approached her nearby black-haired friend. The reason I knew I could also approach her was because my opener on the blonde was so indirect that no martian spectator could conclude I was hitting on her. I was just a friendly guy.

Laurna had a shy personality type, not so conducive for one-night stands. I’d have to use a jackhammer to pry her out of that because a phone number alone would be useless to me. The first thing I did was buy her a shot. Then, to get the conversation off boring chit-chat that she was comfortable with, I tried to steer it to the personal. I asked, “Do you like American men, around 32 years of age, who are hairy and have beards?” She laughed and we ended up talking about our ideal types.

Then I asked when was the last time she had sex (“long time ago”). I asked her if she had made love to an American man before (“no”) and joked that if she’s lucky, she may have that opportunity. It was a risk talking about sex so much, but with little time before the bar closed, I felt like I had no other choice but to be blatantly sexual.

Finally, the last song of the night came on, a romantic R&B number. “Do you want to make slow dance with me?” I asked, in those exact words.

“Yes I do.”

And it’s there we kissed, just as the lights came on, as if right on schedule.

“Do you want to come to my apartment and have a drink with me?” I asked.

“Are you staying in a hotel?”

“No, a private apartment next to the Kampii metro station.”

She paused, a typical response by girls who don’t want to seem easy. I took that as my cue. I said, “But I’m not expecting sex. We’re just going to have a drink and if you want to leave after half an hour that’s fine, but I think it would be fun if we continued the night to talk and maybe kiss a bit more.”

“Okay, but no sex,” she said.

“Of course not,” I smiled.

Now it was time to play the cockblock slalom. She mentioned earlier that she was supposed to share a ride home with her blonde friend, and now there were two Colombian friends of hers tagging along, including a flamer who kept giving me shit for not looking like I was American. In front of the club I passed the test from the Colombian by dropping some American slang. He yelled, “You sound like you’re from New York!” He said that he suspects I’m a sneaky guy, but eventually left with his Colombian lady friend, leaving me with my girl and the blonde. Two down, one to go.

I walked in suspense with them to the taxi stand, with no idea if my girl was coming with me or not. I kept silent while they talked in Finnish. Once there, the blonde got into a cab, closed the door, and left, leaving me and Laurna outside.


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  • gandalf

    I think you got her name wrong, Laurna is not a Finnish name.

    Laura is the closest there is I can think of.

    [Roosh: I made up the name.]

  • John

    Roosh discovers outcome independence: “One of the hardest parts of being a player is controlling your state in the face of disappointment. If I let a situation like that put me in a sour mood, I wouldn’t be able to have the right energy to game other girls.”

  • Wolfie

    “Cockblock slalom” – the perfect description of what happens so often. Definitely a keeper.

  • frodo

    Onnela is usually a good choice. Lots of average talent available if you don’t insist on having a 9 and as a bonus, hipster types hate the place.

    Next time you are around, organize a meeting for the readers. It’s fun to read about my hometown here after following this blog for years.

  • greenlander

    keep up the stories, Roosh. What’s great about your stories is that you put it all out there: the good and the bad. A lot of guys on these forums only talk about their conquests and not about what went wrong.

    So much of chasing girls is just taking the jabs from girls being, well, girls, and just rolling with it, knowing that it’s a numbers game. Sometimes you strike out and that’s just the way it is. Winners get up after they’ve struck out ten times and go hit the eleventh.

  • Can’t wait to read

    part 4 & 5!…please post…

  • Jay in DC

    I’m in total agreement with greenlander. The fact that many people say you are “making shit up” is quite laughable to me.

    You –routinely– talk about the fact that you miss, and miss big. Hell, you were an entire country where you basically barely fucked and you WROTE about it.

    Fake players generally don’t talk about their failures and misses which are all part of real game as anyone can attest. I love that you keep things on the real by talking about your shoot downs too. Great stuff.

  • Anonymous

    lotta foreigners in finland…thought it was 99% white
    i look at the demographics and it seems you and jon found the only iranian, indian and asian girls

    asian boy grindin an indian girl …u dont see that often(or indian girls grindin for that matter)

    love you storys roosh…gotta make it to a movie one day

  • SadieB

    AGAIN you let a girl escape your gravitational pull thru sheer miscalculation?

    You know, I have a cat. He’s a fat little pampered housecat, but he is a fearsome killer of rodents.

    Lately he’s been letting them slip out of his claws for a second opportunity to pounce. Why?


  • Anonymous

    heard ur goin to toronoto….well according to tthis guy aint worth it

    vancouver is 2nd up to montreal with women…ill buy u a pint

  • madmax

    eh eh, son of a bitch 😉 good post man

  • Mr. Pointyface

    Great story about going aggressive to help a shy girl open up.

    Incorrect word usage.

    “Flair” means lively style. “Flare” is a rocket or flame stick used for illumination or in emergencies.

    [Roosh: fixed.]

  • cletus van damme

    So which one would have been the right choice regarding the russian girl? and most of all what is the best way to deal with c0ckblockers in such situations?

    [Roosh: I dealth with the cockblocker okay (engaging her just enough so she doesn’t cb), but I should’ve gone out for that smoke.]

  • Ben

    I don’t think it’s just the fact that you’re telling us the times that you missed out that makes your writings genuine.

    It’s the fact that anyone who’s into game knows exactly the pain in the gut feeling of not going out for that cigarette or leaving the d-floor and losing out on that notch. You’ve got the writing behind the mindset of game down to a tee. Good job man.

  • The G Manifesto

    “By not going out for a smoke, I fucked myself”


    It happens every time.

    – MPM

  • nick

    One of your better multi-part posts yet.
    Solo travels made me a (temporary) smoker… hard to avoid. I owe a few nights to my willingness to pick up cigarettes, which while a ridiculous statement, is completely true.

  • The G Manifesto

    Nick –

    “Solo travels made me a (temporary) smoker… hard to avoid. I owe a few nights to my willingness to pick up cigarettes, which while a ridiculous statement, is completely true.”

    Not ridiculous at all.

    Look back in history to any great International Playboy. The only constant was they were all cigarette smokers.

    – MPM

  • Therapsid

    Fantastic multi-part saga.

    You stayed too briefly in Finland to write a book but long enough to provide an extended narrative. Thanks.

    The series does hint that it might be worth returning to this non-Scandinavian Nordic country at some point.

  • Anonymous

    I’m really liking this installment format. Can’t wait for the next episode.

    Keep these posts coming. Not just for the solid game tips — the quality of the writing here is very high. Your stories always get me fired up to push myself harder when I’m out in the field.

  • 3rd Millenium Men


  • Jake

    “Cockblock slalom” – your writing keeps getting more engaging. Digging the full-on stories.

  • Asmo

    @ Anonymous 8,

    Helsinki and the bigger cities in general have a higher concentration of foreign folks. The rest of the country is not really like that.

  • Kourosh

    I tried to restrain myself, but I just couldn’t hold out any longer. I have to:
    I’ve been reading your material for about a month or so now, and I’ve had a lot of insights as to what I’ve been doing wrong: mistakes I’ve been making that I don’t even notice that I’m doing, but royally fucks me in the way of action. Love you, Roosh! I’ve been working on my own self-development and my game for almost a year, and I’ll be buying your books as soon as possible. I’m currently running around Europe (as I sit here and write this, I’m actually in Helsinki) and I’d love to go out meeting ladies with you if you’re ever up for a town run-around.

    Keep it real, brotherman!