Thoughts On Ejaculating Inside A Girl

Here’s what I wrote in Bang

…make sure you never ejaculate inside her, even if she is on the pill. Not only is the pill not 100% effective, no girl is perfect with taking it every day. Because you don’t want your player career to end prematurely with a newborn, don’t ejaculate inside a girl unless you accept the chance of having a baby with her.

I wrote that when I had a good job and a girl wouldn’t mind having my baby since I had the means to support it, but boy have times have changed. There is a new exception to my previous ejaculation rule…

The poorer you are compared to her, the safer it is to ejaculate inside her.

The reason is obvious: she does not want to have the baby from some deadbeat who can’t even buy diapers. While I don’t remember the last time I ejaculated inside a girl, if I got into a relationship with a lawyer you better believe that I’m busting inside her every night. “Cool keep the baby if you want. Hey can I borrow two bucks to take the bus back to my Dad’s basement?”

But let’s say she’s a Polish au pair in America for a short amount of time. Absolutely no creampies for her even if her tubes are tied. While I’m poor by most standards, to a Polish au pair I’m middle class and having my baby would mean a potential green card if I marry her. The incentives for her are just too great to keep the baby and the last thing in life I need right now is a little Rooshy running around.

Ejaculation safe professions: Lawyer, engineer, publicist, human resources manager, government worker above GS-10, model/actress, doctor, urban planner

Ejaculation unsafe professions: Teacher, retail clerk, artist, writer, barista, bus driver, storekeeper, librarian, secretary, social worker

Sometimes you can tell just by looking at the girl…

Safe:

safe.jpg

Unsafe:

unsafe.jpg

It’s ironic that the more likely a woman can support a baby on her own the safer it is to spread your potent seed inside her. I think we can blame thank feminism for that.

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  • Pole master

    You can still give her anal creampies.

  • http://thedcfeed.com The Editor

    Very interesting post. I just wanted to let you know I have linked to it at The DC Feed. Keep writing!

    The Editor’s last blog post: Roosh: When and When Not.

  • http://thatsmyprerogative.wordpress.com/ Ava V

    Oh, feminism….I hate that crap.

    Ava V’s last blog post: Avec.

  • http://roissy.wordpress.com roissy

    hilarious. i agree with this post.

    it’s good that you put model/actress in the ejaculation safe professions. there’s no way a woman in those careers is going to destroy her looks with a pregnancy.

    roissy’s last blog post: Girls Who Lie.

  • Jay Gatsby

    I find self-photos taken in mirrors to be hilarious. It always looks like the person is selling a camera. How embarrassing can it be to ask someone to take your picture? You don’t need to tell the person why, and if you do, you can always lie that it’s work-related.

    Your point is a good one because it puts the onus on the person who has more to lose from a pregnancy.

  • http://www.thegmanifesto.com/ The G Manifesto

    “Lawyer, engineer, publicist, human resources manager, government worker above GS-10, model/actress, doctor, urban planner”

    – I would change this to successful “working” model/actress. There are tons of broke “model/actresses” these days.

    I would be careful with the the rest of those. Lawyers? Doctors? Engineers??? What do they make these days? $120k? 200k? Have fun being broke in some crappy suburban house with 2 SUV’s. And no decent vacations.

    The only, and I mean only, American Girl to marry is an extremely rich trust fund girl (hopefully one that models a little).

    (By the way, thanks for running my post on Bottle Service)

    -MPM

    The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Lil Wayne – Tha Carter III.

  • http://www.sunglassrepublic.com sunglass republic

    This post is going to get some people in a whole lot of trouble… Strap up!

    sunglass republic’s last blog post: Limited Edition Giorgio Armani 512 Sunglasses.

  • RCR

    This theory presupposes that women operate within the bounds of logic and reason. So. I would still wear a condom.

  • http://jackgoesforth.blogspot.com Jack Goes Forth

    I find it’s also okay to ejaculate in them when you have lied to her about every single detail of your life (name, job, etc). It makes it much easier to avoid them forever and/or deny that you ever met them in the first place.

    “Huh, my name isn’t Stuart?!? I wasn’t at The Front Page last Thursday either… You’re crazy bitch.”

    Jack Goes Forth’s last blog post: Jack Goes To Atlantic City.

  • Tampa

    I never ever ever ever blow inside a chick. Maybe I am a wack job, but I just don’t do it. Not even with a condom on. Never ever ever.

    And I sill had some crazy bitches pulling the “I am late” bull shit.

    I can’t even remember the last time I blew inside a girl.

  • http://thec-and-c.blogspot.com/ Jewcano

    I disagree with your examples. #1 is a serious mantrap who will immediately realize an opportunity to capture someone who can babysit her cats. Also, engineering, not safe at all. That is a purebred MRS degree.

    Jewcano’s last blog post: You Are What You Do When It Counts.

  • http://vksempireofdirt.com virgle kent

    WAIT. A. MINUTE… isn’t that “safe girl”…..

    Dear God Roosh, is this what it’s come to? I can’t have my lead guitarist of Heavy Sack, knocking up groupie chicks like that… it’s just not a good look.

  • http://www.tctheterrible.com TC the Terrible

    You need to add waitress to the UNSAFE/UNCLEAN list. It’s been five years since I banged out a girl that worked for tips. The next day she paged me 17 times. Granted, I banged her every night for almost two weeks, but it really wasn’t worth the headaches. The irony is the only way to get rid of her was to claim I had gotten another girl pregnant a few weeks earlier. This cut her claims of “I’m late” off instantly. She never called back after that.

  • Anonymous

    Roosh, what about the girl who you know does not want kids? Not the “I probably won’t have kids”, but the “there’s no f’in way, I hate kids, i will abort”. I’ve been with a girl like that for a couple years and I bust in her all the time. She takes the pill and I know she’s not trying to trap me.

  • GJ

    Agree Tampa. Just way too many crazies out there.

    Besides, why else did she get a tramp stamp if not for a bullseye?

  • GMoney

    I thought I had it all figured out too, but my now ex-wife pulled the condom out of the trash and got herself pregnant with it. Never under-estimate a woman’s creativity when they want to breed with you.

    A. Never use a condom supplied by the female even if it’s wrapped, they could poke a hole through it without opening it.

    B. Take the dna with you, or if you flush it, make sure and take a dump after to push it on down the pipe.

    C. Remember if you blow a load all over a chick and she goes to “clean up”, she could be collecting it all with a turkey baster and bam, you owe 200k child support. Luckily I am now 40, and I only have 72k child support left. Imagine what fum I could have had with that 124k I have already paid.

    Oh yeah, my ex worked in the concession stand at the bowling alley, should have been my first clue. I wish this blog existed when I was 19, but I guess Roosh was probably still making poopy in his pants back then. ;)

  • Pancake Boy

    GMoney – that’s horrible, and I’ve totally heard of such a thing before. Some of my friends put a little tabasco sauce into the condom post-use (not kidding). Perhaps I should start too…

  • Anonymous

    If you use a condom with spermicide then won’t that kill all the sperm after you bust in the condom?

  • Pancake Boy

    I think that spermicide in the condom is part of the lube on the outside actually…

  • Roosh

    “She takes the pill and I know she’s not trying to trap me”

    She’s not, but are you 100% sure that if she does get pregnant she will not get any pangs of doubt if she should keep it?

  • Anonymous

    I’m pretty sure I went to law school with the “safe” chick. Seriously.

  • Anon

    “my now ex-wife pulled the condom out of the trash and got herself pregnant with it.

    Luckily I am now 40, and I only have 72k child support left. Imagine what fum I could have had with that 124k I have already paid.

    Oh yeah, my ex worked in the concession stand at the bowling alley, should have been my first clue.”

    HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

    Look on the bright side:

    Once you have been collared by child support for 1 kid, you are free to impregnate every chick you fuck because (1) total child support is CAPPED after 3 kids, and (2) the difference between payments for 3 kids vs. 1 kid is MARGINAL.

    I wonder why guys don’t use that fact when negotiating kid support. “You want $2000 a month for the kid? Fine, I’m gonna knock up 9 other chicks and you’ll have to share that $2000 with them.”

  • GMoney

    Anon, obviously you are a Mexican. Just because my ex was a pile of crap, I didn’t punish the kids for it. I actually take care of them, I am just giving my hard earned advice. Prevention is the point, not go knock up as many chicks as I can and abandon them, that’s what’s wrong with the planet now, too many abandoned kids that are emotionally damaged, probably like yourself. Spermicide won’t cut it. You are supposed to use foam with a condom. Read the information, without foam you are playing russian roulette, especially if you break it at the wrong time. If you bust all over her, go get a towel and clean her up, you will earn brownie points.The only safe way is go get clipped, but I still don’t have the nads to go do it.

  • Unoriginal since 1992!

    Maybe Roosh has finally found the one thing that married people have over you single folks. In a good marriage – this excludes the angry child support payers – ejaculation is expected and part of the bargain! No worries about foams, latex, or pregnancy. For those married men and women who enjoy extramarital relations, the problems only increase trying to juggle sperm/eggs and partners.

    For married guys the motto sould be “come early and come often” (but not too early and as often as you can).

  • Pancake Boy

    Re: Unoriginal since 1992!:

    Come on now, you’ve just threw out a falsehood. We all know that married women already have the prize, and therefore stop giving it up. The only ejaculation they want is to further entrap the guy into monetary payments for eternity (or 18 years).

    Daily sex among married people, for example, is so rare that when it does happen it makes national news:

    http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/08/fashion/08nights.html?incamp=article_popular_1

  • Pancake Boy

    PS – apologies that my grammar is atrocious.

  • Gunslingergregi

    Pancake,

    Ok do you see the look on her face. She now worships her husband. Pretty cool. So that is all it takes is good sexin every day and your woman will be happy. As you can see lot of work when it is a long term relationship for those people. Going on 2 1/2 years of cuddly talk every day myself seems to work well. Nice to be worshiped and to worship.

  • Sweatpants

    “Maybe Roosh has finally found the one thing that married people have over you single folks.”

    Yeah, if you’re lucky enough to find yourself in a marriage where sex actually still happens after the ring is on.

  • http://travelvice.com craig of travelvice.com

    now now Roosh — just because you knock the Polish girl up doesn’t mean you have to 1) marry her or 2) grant your bastard child US citizenship. A little fucked up, but good information to know.

    I wrote about this recently, here: Reject Child Support To Deny U.S. Citizenship

    craig of travelvice.com’s last blog post: EFL Teaching Restrictions Revealed.

  • Anon

    “Anon, obviously you are a Mexican. Just because my ex was a pile of crap, I didn’t punish the kids for it. I actually take care of them”

    Sorry, Bubba. You can keep telling yourself that you’re taking care of your kids, but the reality is:

    1. Your monthly checks are made out to your trailer trash ex-wife, NOT your kids.

    2. Your monthly checks are getting spent on her trailer trash boyfriends.

    3. Your kids are getting molested up the ass by the trailer trash she brings home.

    4. Your ex-wife and her boyfriends have more say and influence on how your kids are raised than you do. They’re going to be as fucked up as your ex.

    That’s what you get for marrying concession stand bitches at 19.

  • http://www.bittersweetamalgam.com Angelo De La Vega

    haha, interesting theory. I tend to agree with some of the comments: I believe women are entirely too irrational to predict their abortion tendencies given their profession.

    Personally, I’ve ejaculated inside about 80% of the women I’ve banged since college. I’m obviously very stupid, but I’m also either very lucky or very sterile.

    Angelo De La Vega’s last blog post: Angelo De La Vega vs The Gulf Stream.

  • http://www.thelifenomadic.com Jobs in Antarctica

    Roosh! Man the article was great – some of these comments are good too!

    “social worker” should be moved out of the don’t ejaculate inside her category and moved to don’t even stick your penis in her. Girls are already messed up enough before taking a job surrounded by the worst that humanity has to offer

    craig…while knocking up the Polish chick doesn’t obligate the knocker-upper to marriage it does obligate him to finacially support the offspring – and if that offspring is born in the U.S. guess what it’s citizenship is?

    and finally, if you wanna keep bangin’ ‘em NEVER marry ‘em

    Jobs in Antarctica’s last blog post: Alternative Jobs: Kwajalein Atoll.

  • Cynically Yours

    At this point, take a deep breath and open your copies of Sperm Wars.

  • Snoka

    Allow me to retort, pic-wise.

    The first, if single, may be more incline to keep a baby, just to have one, and if nothing else, you are the perfect daddy to complain about, ALL DAY. (Her favorite hobby).

    The girl on the second pic, goes in fact, in your model-category, which sort of makes her an untouchable. Unless, of course, she is socially incapable, and inclined to cling onto anything that will make her “a part of someone’s life”.

    Otherwise, go ahead and squirt into Kate Moss there and be careful w miss lonely lawyer.

  • z.g.

    Never cum inside.

    Even if you are a jobless bum, she might like the sex so much that inside her head she may think “Sex good, genes good, make baby”

    No matter what your job, you will pay child support, or end up in jail.

    This is like playing russian roulette with 5 chambers loaded. For what?

    To cum into a fleshy hole.

  • Lol

    At you dumbasses, if you get a chick prenant, fight for cusosity or joint-co. Instead of giving up or not trying and be an ATM.

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  • 9inchTroy

    Two words.. pearl necklace

    make sure you clean up ur goo. biatches will think ur being a gentleman… lol

  • Heliac

    “The only safe way is go get clipped, but I still don’t have the nads to go do it.”

    GMoney: LOL, now that’s what I call an oxymoron!

  • ass pirate

    you myfriend are the absolute man

  • http://doubleyourgains.com Caleb – Double Your Gains

    Hmmm …

    I’ve adopted a NEVER cum in a girl rule.

    Never.

    Unless you want a baby with her.

    In fact, I pull out WITH a condom on.

    (and when not wearing them too, of course).

    Preferably, for me, she’s on the pill, condoms in play AND I pull out …

    I figure, unless she pulls the “condom outa the trash” or “grab it off her tummy/tits/face” routine … it’s pretty much full proof.

    Now if I could just get the non-ejaculatory orgasm technique mastered–I’d be set :)

    Later,
    Caleb

    Caleb – Double Your Gains’s last blog post: Running Too Much Can Straight Up Kill You, Yo!.

  • Polish Lawyer

    You should watch what you post.

  • rickb223

    Get snipped. No worries.

  • Hencredible Casanova

    Me and my boys have these talks all the time, but we have a no cumming in an American chick rule. Unless she’s old money pedigree, we prefer chicks from the EU because those governments have incredible benefits for children and their families.

  • Anonymous

    awww I like this post.

    I’m kind of girl that it’s unsafe to ejaculate inside me. lol I’m quite feminist but artistic and poor.