I get a lot of feedback from girls about things guys do that they don’t like. It’s usually something awkward, needy, or weird, or some sort of combination.

A common complaint is touching. Either guys don’t do it or they skip a lot of steps that make the touch a big deal and something way too noticeable. The best way to touch a girl is same way you’d boil a frog—do it gradually so she doesn’t even notice. Your hands are playing with her breasts and she doesn’t know or care how it got to that point. The mistake is touching aggressively before you laid the groundwork. Toss the frog in boiling water and it will immediately jump out.

So how did I figure that out? From girls of course. When a girl likes you she will usually touch your arm, shoulder, or top of your hand when you say something funny or interesting. As time goes on, she will touch you more frequently and for slightly longer, up to a second—a second!—or so in length. It’s hard to realize what she’s doing unless you really pay attention, and that’s how it should be—things flows naturally as you get to know each other. You can begin this natural progression by touching very soon when first meeting a girl. If you touch too late after you’ve had several opportunities, it will feel “weird” to her and I will hear about it.

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