Washington DC Meetup: October 13

Washington DC makes up a disproportionate amount of my readers, more than any other city in the United States besides New York City. It’s the place where it all began for me and where the pain continues for a lot of guys who rather be somewhere else. Well next Saturday we can put all the complaints aside and hang out as men, because I’m hosting a meetup with my bodyguard Virgle Kent.

When: Saturday, October 13 from 8pm to 12:00am

Where: Location will be announced at 6pm on the day of the meetup via my Twitter feed. Check it before you arrive in case we change venues after 8. The neighborhood will be U Street.

What: This is a casual meetup. There will be no Hello stickers, speeches, or top hats. Meet your fellow man, tell me your life story, drink, and try to bang something above a 4.

Secret Handshake: I’ve done blog happy hours before so what’ll happen is that there will be a few guys around me and then another circle of people who are also part of the meetup. A forum member recommended a secret handshake of sorts so you don’t have to go around asking guys if they’re part of the “Roosh thing.” What you should do if you think a guy is part of the group is ask him where a pet shop is. He can confirm by giving an answer that at some point contains the secret code word: “hamster.” Here’s an example:

First Gentleman (suspecting the other is an RVFer): Excuse me, do you know if there’s a good pet shop nearby?

Second Gentleman (indeed, an RVFer): Why, yes, they even sell a special breed of hamster…….. (raised eyebrow)

If he doesn’t give an answer with “hamster,” then he is not part of the meetup and continued efforts to talk to him will be viewed suspiciously. Bottom line is don’t be shy. You may have to approach your fellow man and then have a series of conversations until you and I can finally shake hands as the heterosexual men that we are.

“I’m a girl. Can I come?” I’m friendly to all my female fans but if you’re not at least a 6 then don’t bother. You should come close to being a girl of this caliber:

If you come with the purpose to debate me or my readers then we will gangrape you (emotionally, not physically, because I’ve never physically raped a woman and would never condone such a thing in any jurisdiction where it is illegal by law).

“This sounds like it will be a sausage fest”. Will it ever! On October 13 this will be the most glorious sausage fest in the city outside of Cobalt. I expect at least 30 guys to show, mostly starting at 8 but then it will trail off as the night goes on. We will single-handedly destroy any chance that other guys will get laid. To help me pick appropriately sized venues for the meetup, please fill out this one-minute survey if you’re thinking of coming.

Out Of Town Logistics: There are bus routes from many East Coast cities, run by companies such as Eastern ShuttleMega Bus, and GotoBus. If you go to Skyscanner, you can probably find air fares under $100. There are four options for lodging. The first is Booking.com for hotels that average over $150 per night. Then there are hostel options that start at $35/night. Third is Airbnb ($60/night and up). Lastly there is my Dad’s basement. The key is to be within walking distance of any Metro station. This map is centered around the best location to be in.

On totally unrelated matters, I like drinking flavored vodkas with only ice. Absolut Citron and Stoli Vanilla are my favorites.

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