What Manning Up Really Means

I noticed that you never hear a young girl telling a guy to man up. The demand is always coming from girls over 25, sometimes much older than that. I think I know why this is…

A woman’s desire for men to “man up” is inversely correlated to the number of dating options she has.

The more men she has in the pipeline, the less likely she’ll care if a guy mans up or not. Do you think a hot 21 year old co-ed, who is getting more attention than she can handle, who has guys desperately trying to wife her up, really notices that men in Western society are withdrawing from the marriage game? Things couldn’t be more peachy in her world because of the nonstop attention party she’s enjoying.

But all parties come to an end. The young girl will make the decision to pass on many suitors to perpetually live the Sex and the City lifestyle. When she turns 30 the wrinkles around her eyes are no longer easy to hide with Covergirl, and guys suddenly become more lazy in trying to get her out on a date. They are not contacting her after she puts out like they were before, even though she made them wait three full dates before opening her legs instead of three hours. They’re not so eager to introduce her to friends. The attention she gets on OK Cupid is good for only a temporary confidence boost since 99% of the guys messaging her are lower quality than what she could get in the past. Something is off, but since it definitely isn’t her, since she has done absolutely no wrong in her life and made no poor decisions, what must have happened in the previous six years is that men became boys. There is no other logical explanation.

She has fond memories of being 23 and wanted by every guy without having to do any work on her part. But even though she’s now more cultured, more traveled, more intelligent, more polished, more cuntish (in a way that female authors argue is attractive), none of that is hooking them like they did before. She remains oblivious to the fact that age and beauty matters. She sincerely believes that suddenly men have lost interest in being men. The sad truth is they have simply lost interest in her. She decided not to get on the ship when it was boarding, and now it has sailed away, never to return.

This is what manning up really means: for you to accept that she was a party slut in her early 20s while in her physical prime. Manning up means to forget her past, her mistakes, and the opportunities she passed on. Manning up means to commit to a “strong” woman who has read a lot of books and dined in many restaurants that got positive reviews on Yelp. Manning up means chasing older women who have been pumped and dumped dozens of times. Manning up means decreasing your sexual opportunities by not learning game and not traveling to countries where you can get better women. Manning up means marrying a spinster who has shown no signs she would be a good mother. Manning up means committing the rest of your life to an entitled woman who will let herself go and care only about her career accomplishments, not her appearance, and definitely not your happiness.

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  • Tampa

    Pretty much the sad truth when it comes to women these days. I still perplexes me how women see nothing wrong with waiting until their mid 30′s to find a husband. I guess they haven’t read much up on fertility. Talk about risking it all to find for the possible home run. It’s laughable.

  • George

    In a culture where most women are thin, then having a few wrinkles in her thirties will be a major detriment. However America is an obese nation and the hot 23 year old will still get male attention well into her thirties and forties if she is “just” fat or slightly less than fat.

    The amount of fat women with normal looking boyfriends and husbands is ridunkulous in America.

    The divorce rate wouldn’t be so high in America for women in their thirties and forties if they still couldn’t hook male suitors.

  • http://thesoloist1.wordpress.com/ Solo

    Dear Roosh and readers and commentators

    We must ban together as brothers black and white, Asian, blue etc. Put our differences aside and put these entitled Slores down. Entitled Snooki Slores are becoming the norm this is not acceptable. Even single mothers think they deserve a Top Notch dude and have this entitled attitude! If the tide doesn’t turn, it’s gonna be bad. For white guys take it from a black guy who knows. Do you wanna deal with entitled single mothers? it’s already fucked for black men but you white dudes still have a chance to stop your women from this bullshit.

    1. No dating entitled Slores (even if she is hot,)
    2. No dating entitled single mothers and wifing them up (why The fuck would you take care of someone else’s kid who ain’t even taking care of his own?)

    If not feminism is gonna fuck you in the ass like it did to the black man, where single black entitled mothers are looked at as “Queens”. And will try to shame you if you don’t date one.

    Written

    By a “Frustrated black Man”

  • http://www.theincendiaryinsight.blogspot.com DW

    Theres going to be a lot of loneliness in the future for the oldest women of my generation (Millennial). They bought the lie hook, line, and sink her and now they find themselves with no prospects for marriage except to the men they would have scorned in their prime. I wrote an article on this and the topic of manning up not long ago. It’s just another way of diverting blame for making one of the worst decisions of their lives, since they’ll be damned if they ever accept responsibility for their actions and try to WARN the younger women.

  • jon bon van dame

    Excellent spin on popular saying! I hear the term manning up all the time. It usually is about manning up to marry if she has your kid though, not manning up to marry with no kids involved.

  • George

    I have never heard the term “man up” coming from anyone in real life.

    It’s used by female bloggers and liberal journalists to shame men into providing free money to women, but it’s original meaning is about going out there and fighting, playing football, or competing against other men.

  • Marmot

    @George: I do hear it as “Why are all men such pigs” though, which is almost the same thing…

  • Anonymous

    “Man Up” – Do what I say or I’ll question your masculinity

    Proper response: backhanded bitch slap

  • wolfen

    solo number 3 is dead on but men are to blame totally for this situation it will never never change men are to weak

  • Pete

    @Tampa, I think that a lot of women realize that something is wrong with fucking around through their twenties and waiting until their thirties to settle down. Its just that they don’t realize it until they get to their thirties because they drank the feminist kool-aid that it was their right to and men should just accept that. There are two reasons why that kool-aid is still around. The first one is that beta males enable these women to demand this. The second is that older women are too delusional and/or selfish to warn off the specters of their young selves from making the same mistakes.

  • Anonymous

    To paraphrase Roosh – “Oh you mad cause I’m stylin on you”

  • Giovanni

    100% agree with you Roosh… I still see many guys running behind women though (without getting them) and settle with less they should when they become older. Ah well… I just hope more & more men will get the point of being a man, and use the position they are in, in stead of going for a safe bet in stead of the best they can get.

  • Odds

    Feminism: Older women trying to keep older men from dating younger women.

  • http://www.vksempireofdirt.com virgle Kent

    LOL there is so much truth in this post, The truth is a woman with real option and her pick of men won’t wait for you to man up or grow up to get with her, she’ll simply pick the best man that fits her at that moment if she’s smart she’ll get with that older guy who has his shit together that the spinster all want but can’t get anymore

  • http://flyfreshandyoung.wordpress.com flyfreshandyoung

    Damn man. Earth, scorched and all that.

  • Oskar Anon

    When the lad is right, he’s spot on. Nice one.

  • CC

    Great article, though it’s more admirable that she cares about her career accomplishments as opposed to riding the coat-tails of your success.

  • M.

    @George – it also comes in the form of “Grow Up” said to a man. It’s the same sentiment and you’ve probably heard it, depending on your age.

    My hot, 22 yr old most recent LTR used to try to shame me with that tripe all the time since I’m in my 30s and wouldn’t commit to marrying her or getting completely out the game.

    Using the knowledge gained here and on Roissy, I dumped her and was deep in a new 21 yr old less than a week later on my first night out.

    Lesson: Gentlemen, learn and get out there, and don’t put up with that $hit.

  • samseau

    And yet, despite how transparent the shaming language of “manning-up” is, millions of men will fall for this bullshit and marry 30 yr olds.

    The human race continues, but only at the sacrifice of men who voluntarily opt to be ground into lube for the sake of reproduction.

  • Lord Rooshman

    Isn’t the average age of marriage for women 26?

    The stupid women who wait until their 30′s to marry are a lost cause. I don’t listen to what they say and neither should anyone else.

  • Diomedes

    Roosh, great post.

  • Rich

    Everything here is right. The details are what hits home (the Yelp comment). 2011 marks a changing point for me due to your posts and others (CH, Assonova, VirgilK etc.) It’s not hatred I feel towards today’s woman. Now, it is true and utter pity.

    I know these girls as friends, co-workers, and lovers. The confusion and pain in their eyes, as the MAN section in their LIFE PLAN doesn’t follow the directions, really hits at 33+. When seeing that girl you sweated just five years ago, you don’t even consider her with interest.

    Those wrinkles around the eyes at 29 seem to frame the beginning panic. The thinning skin at the cheekbones, those wrinkles which appear at the bottom of the throat, the weird way in which smooth young taunt skin from the butt to the breasts changes from one piece to a bunch of barely perceptible slight bulges.

    My work Christmas party was tough. I noticed guys were not talking about previous years “hot” co-workers anymore. Those women stood in key high traffic areas waiting for attention most of the night. The wives of male co-workers, aged from 30 to 50, no longer ask me if I’m serious about the girl I brought. The male co-workers tell me their wives does not want them hanging around me anymore.

    This red pill, it does bring you happiness in knowing the real rules. No one really discusses the costs though. You can no longer look at women the same. That hope, that you have when first meeting a girl, that she may be different, is no longer there. You know which of your female friends are doomed to being lonely. They ask when men will come. You can identify every reason why your current lover will never make it past the current level. What are the personal costs in knowing the next two moves? Rich, 37 yo male. There is no going back, and no wanting to, but there are clear costs.

  • Piano Keys

    Brilliant Post

    this line in particular is so true, “Manning up means to commit to a “strong” woman who has read a lot of books and dined in many restaurants that got positive reviews on Yelp.”

    This is Church Roosh.

  • Anonymous

    Have you read Why Men Marry Bitches? I saw it in the library yesterday and skimmed through a couple of seconds. It seems that she argues in favor a female equivalent of game, and even steals game concepts like shit tests, claiming the men use them to test a woman’s confidence.

  • Bongo

    FYI: very thin women wrinkle faster and those who stay thin through years of yoyo dieting or smoking turn into hags FAST. Now I don’t advocate finding a fatty. What I mean is that if you’re looking for a woman for the long term its better to find a normal BMI woman than one who is rail thin. My cousin married a Russian when she was 25 and he was 37. Sounds perfect and it was when she was this thin and tight young thing. She’s probably barely 105 pounds, just like the day she got married but now at age 35 she looks older than he does.

  • G

    GREAT FUCKING POST!

  • michael

    Beautiful.

    Yeah, it gets sickening. I just broke it off with a bitch who in the past, was willing to do whatever to make her man happy. She was willing to sacrifice and fight to make it work.

    Now, she is focused on her career, and can’t understand why I don’t want to commit to the girl who was once willing to do anything for her guy, but now is full of baggage, inhibitions and ice-cold emotions.

  • http://kaneadvice.wordpress.com Kane

    You deserve some kind of lifetime achievement award for all the good you do for men. I really mean that.

  • The Glee Manifesto

    Jeesus.. are women really telling you to “man up”?
    Where is this happening?

  • Anonymous

    6 George:

    I have never heard the term “man up” coming from anyone in real life.

    It’s used by female bloggers and liberal journalists to shame men into providing free money to women,

    So much for male-female “eeeeeeeequaaaaaaaaaaliteeeeeeee”…

    If not feminism is gonna fuck you in the ass like it did to the black man, where single black entitled mothers are looked at as “Queens”. And will try to shame you if you don’t date one. @Solo (aka Frustrated Black Man)

    Great freaking point there, and great overall comment… and I agree with you 100% Brother.

  • Anonymous

    Have you read Why Men Marry Bitches?

    Cuz most of these types of “men” are bitches themselves (supa-dupa betas).

    I saw it in the library yesterday and skimmed through a couple of seconds. It seems that she argues in favor a female equivalent of game, and even steals game concepts like shit tests, claiming the men use them to test a woman’s confidence.

    The author of this book, Sherry Argov, is of the same, er, ‘lineage’ as Betty Friedan and Gloria Steinam… so that should really help to explain a lot ’bout her motives.

    *For those of you who still don’t get it, Argov also shares a ‘heritage’ with Karl Marx – both ideologically and ancestrally ;)

  • Anonymous

    It seems that she argues in favor a female equivalent of game

    Again, to smoke out who are likely going to be the best beta provider dorks to “take care” of her, post-carousel – obviously not the more dominant and masculine alphas (and Greater Betas).

  • cc

    So… what you guys are saying ‘Why Men Marry Bitches’ is all about women suckering betas into marrying them then?

    Why are you guys complaining then? These ‘bitches’ are probably women you wouldn’t want anyway, so everyone wins because they’re knocking on the betas’ door instead of your door. If they’re beta then I suppose they’re better off having a woman take charge.

  • M.

    @Rich 22 Damn, man, that’s some depressing $hit. I’m not even going to get into why you’re worried about those women who wouldn’t give two seconds of thought to you, but, you need to live in the moment more and enjoy life.

    You’ve traded blissful ignorance for willful wisdom-embrace it, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy your current lover, her embrace, her genuine affection for you, yours for her and have a good time with the person.

    Roissy has talked about some of the costs btw. As he said long ago, “just because I can see the forest and the trees doesn’t mean I don’t still savor the beauty and majesty of the forest” truth

  • Donkey_puncher

    That was a well argued article.

  • Pingback: THE TRUE MEANING OF “MAN UP”

  • outlaw josey wales

    Yelp line was money. Once you take the red pill, your whole world view changes, but then you realize that the vast majority of people do not think this way. So game leads to a certain loneliness or otherness or apartness, or whatever you want to call it. You will never belong to the culture again. But that is a price and sacrifice I am more than willing to make.

  • Anonymous

    Gold.
    Someone take up a kitty to put this on the big board in Times Square.

  • ken

    What is good in life for a man?

    Faster horses,

    Older whiskey,

    Younger women,

    More money!

    Wisdom of the ages.

  • http://www.thesolomonpress.com Samuel

    I think there are times where the exhortation to “man up” is appropriate…

    including when a man is being a pussy about something hard that needs to be done

    whether it be a chore or task… or something even tougher, like raising his children.

    If you’re man enough to bang chicks, then you should be man enough to look after your offspring if they come. Deadbeat dads, in my humble opinion, would do well to “man up”. (Unless they cannot because of the ass-rape they got in divorce court)

    As far as women saying it, that’s all wrong. They don’t know SHIT about what it takes to be a man.

    I would only accept the rebuke of “man up” if it came from another man, whom I respect. I don’t take orders from women.

  • Anonymous

    cc:

    So… what you guys are saying ‘Why Men Marry Bitches’ is all about women suckering betas into marrying them then?

    Why are you guys complaining then?

    We are just tryin to protect our brothers, cc, from a life of hellish manipulation from a woman who willnot, nay cannot, ever meaningfully love or (more importantly) bond to him.

    Even betas are human too, after all.

  • zigzag

    Good post but in all fairness you are rehashing a fact of life that all unplugged men, particularly Mens Rights advocates already knew, but nonetheless having it posted here is a good idea and am glad you are finally getting a fucking clue instead of bashing the Mens Rights demographic as being sexual loooooooooooosers.

    The only thing I’d like to add is the fact that the majority of men in the usa are still so loved starved and sex starved that even a washed up thirty something, sprinkled with genital herpes, illegit bastard kid (from a felon doing time in prison – ah, yes the ultimate alpha male) in tow, piece of shit female will still be able to find a sucker from the legions of desperate men who still want them.

    We still have a ways to go before we see a shift in the attitudes of men.

  • cc

    “We are just tryin to protect our brothers, cc, from a life of hellish manipulation from a woman who willnot, nay cannot, ever meaningfully love or (more importantly) bond to him.

    Even betas are human too, after all.”

    I know, I just figured somebody’s gotta take care of these damaged broads, right? Yeah, being a reformed party slut means they can’t have their past top suitors anymore, but it doesn’t mean they deserve to be alone for the rest of their lives either.

    “The only thing I’d like to add is the fact that the majority of men in the usa are still so loved starved and sex starved that even a washed up thirty something, sprinkled with genital herpes, illegit bastard kid (from a felon doing time in prison – ah, yes the ultimate alpha male) in tow, piece of shit female will still be able to find a sucker from the legions of desperate men who still want them.”

    I think the only way to counter-act that would be to identify the problem while they’re still young and stop letting so many young boys grow up into sex-starved desperate young men.

  • Rambo

    @ 42 agreed.

    Ive seen these exact types continuously find suckers who are otherwise pretty decent guys just horribly beta( i was one). I just heard about a guy I know of who was with this girl I went to middle school with. Shes in her 30′s with a 8 yr old bastard and he ponied up all his time/affection/money etc for this broad for at least a year. Well I heard the other night she broke it off with him and the very next night was at the bar with another dude.

    This doesnt come as a surprise to any of us the endless legions of beta suckers who will line up for these fucking worthless gutter snipes. WTF do they have no dignity?? I still try to feel pity for them but for the most part I think they get what they deserve….and thats a sad sad observation of the quality of men I see around.

    The truth can be quite painful to uncover but if I had to do it all over I couldnt choose to be willfully ignorant.

  • Dave B

    I remember working at a university diversity office as a writer and editor for some of their written materials. I was one of the few young white males present, the bulk of the staff being made up of minorities and females.

    I don’t even remember how it came up, but one young woman asked when I thought a woman reached her “prime.” The office got silent and pretty much every woman there was waiting for my answer. I was no dummy so I said, “Err,mmm, around 45 maybe.” (I mean I couldn’t be honest and say, “Most of you are already well past it.”)

    You’d think I was the second coming. Every woman there, and especially the girl who asked me (22, blonde, about an 8 or so), was thrilled by my answer. But it was really a response of just absolute relief on their part.

    My point is, even young and hot women seem to constantly dread the aging and drying up process. I think even a high school cheerleader is worried about all this stuff. It’s biological and they can’t avoid it. It just becomes an unavoidable reality once they hit their 30s. Just like they know they’ll have to pay off those department store credit cards at some point, but try not to worry too much about it until it’s just too late.

  • DiamondEyes

    and all the subsequent beta victims of these entitled, delusional broads who think they will keep getting better till 45, thank you for your nutlessness Dave.

  • Dave B

    Hey sorry. I keep forgetting that so many readers of these kinds of blogs actually struggle with women. I think they’re more amusing than anything (women I mean). Would you want a woman who worked in a diversity office anyway? I mean for the long term, which is the only way a woman’s delusions would matter to you? For the short term, the nuttier they are the better. Just sayin’.

  • DiamondEyes

    “Would you want a woman who worked in a diversity office anyway?”

    no not at all, in fact my next crack was going to be a clever dig about you working in a diversity office. haha

  • Dave B

    That’s okay though. It’s not like I’m proud of it, but it paid for my “higher education.” But it was often like seeing the insides of “the beast” that is our modern government.

  • DiamondEyes

    but you’re right, I bet they make great lays if you appease their vanity a bit

  • http://www.50fifty50.co.uk 50fifty50

    I think it’s a greed situation with women. It’s like when your given a box of chocolates, rather than save them for future use you will most likely eat them all at once. Because you can just buy another box right? Not if they stop being produced..
    Women tend to assume that their track record will continue without taking into account their own attributes decreasing.

  • Chris

    Case in point; read my response to this article by Kate Bolick. You’d think she’d want to get married just to lose the surname.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/discussion/comment-permalink/13467652

  • Anonymous

    Nothing new… MRAs have been saying this for years. And yet somehow you feel fit to cast aspersions on them.

  • Gus

    Women maybe saying this for whatever reason, but there is clearly some issue with excessive feminization of guys in the US. This post is a good example of something that is seriously wrong – http://hiddenleaves.wordpress.com/2011/12/08/delicate-men/

  • enlightened

    The problem with this state of affairs is the alpha male syndrome and movies like sex and the city.

    Look at black society with their alpha male culture, single mothers everywhere

    In order for alpha males to be alpha males you need slores, slores don’t go for beta males, they go for alpha males during their slore phase.

    To stop the current state of events take alpha male out the equation, no more 30yr old spent slores with bastard kids fathered by alpha males.

  • LC

    I was a good girl in college and all through my 20
    s waiting for the right man and not sleeping around. I’m still a good girl in my 30s, but that means being very lonely as there is only “game” now. The men weren’t interested and were only going for their “bang” while I was younger. So then as we get older, the men only want younger & younger women. A woman these days isn’t getting asked to get married at age 23 like my Mom who was asked by 3 men at age 17 to get married. The men aren’t interested anymore because they don’t have to be. Nice girls get dumped b/c the guys want to play around. One of my dearest friends married a guy who was 10 years older than her; he never mentioned that he had 3 STDs before he married her (or up until 6 years in, and she wanted to have a child). He was completely sterile. She’s now single after wasting 7 years of her 20s with this evil man. Not all of us are bad, and we good girls don’t deserve to waste away because of this awful game you have going.

  • Captaingh

    @ 22 & 37

    Man I’m just starting to get this feeling as well!! I’ve worked so hard to become good in tha game that I’ve swallowed and ingrained this Red Pill knowledge completely and my worlview and women has changed.

    By being in tha game, you become a more interesting man, but there’s a price to pay. Another commenter said that you won’t ever be able to be part of and respect this culture, and it’s true. LOTS OF WOMEN ARE GREAT, BUT EVERY ONE OF THEM HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE EVIL AND GET AWAY WITH IT!!

    The game has been beneficial in my life big time, and I’m happy about it, but I do realize that the price that I paid is the lost of innocence that a women is a pretty flower that can’t do no wrong.

  • seth

    man up and marry those sl@ts

    how depressing

    english women 10 years ago looked good. now they look like cr@p.

    the men have followed suit.

    it is due to feminism.

    women peak at 22-23 then get worse. Its rare for a woman to be as high value after this age (unless hot women are scarce in that country). I spend a lot of time in europe btw, where beauty is common.

  • FuckMeUpATree

    seth is correct. beauty is common in europe

  • joey

    Weird,im starting to think that all guys here need women to LET them be men.

    That’s fucked up,i don’t need a fucking woman to Let me be a man.

    If you need a woman to let you be a man,then your not a fucking real man at all mate.

    A real man is a real man and if a woman doesn’t like it,oh fucking well.

    She can piss off.

    Seriously this complaining is pure utter beta-type chirping.

    Only a beta would complain that women aren’t letting him be a man.LMOA!

  • fieldradiohater

    So True! imagine if this article was in vogue or some other crap woman power magazine… oh be careful that this does not turn into a “rape manual” SOMEHOW! I know, I know…. SOCIETY HATES,

  • hooyut

    Hey, just so you know, S got upset at my response to that guy that came in all condescending and rude, this is what I would say in response to your comment:

    Thanks, I don’t mean to come off a persecutor of homosexuals I am just opposed to big, flashy, in our faces movement when all the end goal is to get the same benefits, I think in the end if they just compromised and accepted they have civil unions and left marriage alone, this topic would have died years ago.

    Just to add in, for some reason because he disagrees with my point of view he blocked from the site, I’m not sure why he got so upset today, but it looks like I won’t be around anymore. I thought he was more level headed and mature than that, but as we all know from the marine corpse; power corrupts.

  • fieldradiohater

    really? your blocked? wtf… no dude, i see your points of view…yeah its true, when something is accepted right, ok fine…but its like you have to accept a new culture and if you dont, your shit on? it makes no sense dude. Example, i worked at a press factory, half the employees were out of jail and shit, ok i dont care you know, but we had pedophiles working there right, dude lips had to be tight around those fucks…if you said something to one of them your fired, or a hate crime. A PEDOPHILE? what?? Americas going down the shitter bud… yo, heres my email seems like no one uses this disqus, so im goign to post it then delete it in a few hours: nathansmith033088@gmail.com

  • fieldradiohater

    i really dont care about Race/religion/ sexual preference… I dont give a shit, if my neighbors were homosexual latino men, the whole block I wouldnt care lol, hey whats up your boyfriend borrowed my tool set or whatever you know lmao, when can i get it back.

    BUT, ok a pedophile…alright i can understand that you were born that way nothing you can do about it, you dont wake up one day and you like kids, however DO NOT EVER act upon it, that fucking simple…so then ulitmatley who would know? I like woman… does that mean, im going rape one? NO. But society wants me to accept WHAT THEY DID?, fucking excuse me? respect them? they ruined some childs life?… ahh man fuck this planet dude

  • hooyut

    You got that right. I think America is leading the charge into the hellhole and its gonna drag everyone with it. Like I was saying, if the homosexuals accepted they have civil unions and don’t mess up marriage but still retained all the financial benefits this whole “movement” would have died years ago.

    It is always going to be about the money.