All posts by Chaco

The Glow

A few weeks ago my girl and I rented “A Streetcar Named Desire.” For you non-movie buffs, one of the most famous moments in movie history occurs in that film: when Marlon Brando lets out an unforgettable mating call to his wife Stella from the bottom of his animal heart (“Stellllaaaaa!!”). She responds to his passionate, lusty cry and he literally carries her over his shoulder in their bedroom. The next morning, Stella’s sister Blanche (played by Vivian Leigh, Gone with the Wind’s Scarlett O’Hara) is asking how Stella could be with such a brute like Brando, but Stella is just glowing and purrs about how he was “as gentle as a lamb.”

What got my attention was the glow on Stella’s face. Her look of sexual satisfaction was unmistakable. Her face clearly said, “I got it good last night!” It was actually pretty surprising to see that so obviously portrayed in a 1951 film, back when I thought women weren’t supposed to know what good sex was, you know, before the sexual revolution and all. But clearly they knew damn well and it seems the rest of the world knew too.

The scene got me thinking about the women I have dated. If I say so myself, I have noticed that women I have dated definitely glow brightly when things are hot and heavy. And I don’t mean right after, I mean all the time. One woman, after a few weeks into our relationship, actually started getting asked by her female friends, “What are you doing for your skin?? You are glowing!”

I started to wonder just how universal a phenomenon this glow is? Can one look at a woman and tell if she is getting it good or not just from the presence or absence of a glowing look on her face? So decided to I performed a little informal experiment. For one week, every morning I carefully observed the women I saw on the way to work, both in the street and on the Metro. I would look for women who have The Glow. I figured morning was the best time, because it would be ‘the morning after’, whereas later in the day her mood and face could be more heavily affected by the stress of her job. What I found surprised me:

Number of Women Observed: Hundreds
Number of Women who Glow: 19
Average Number Per Day: 3.8
Number of Women over 30 who Glow: 0
Number of Women who Look Dull, Tense, and Gray: Too many to Count

I’m serious. And people, we’re talking crowded morning commute on the Red Line here, we’re not talking about a stroll down a country lane. What does this data mean?

Hypothesis 1: It could mean the women of Washington, with rare exceptions, are not getting it on the regular, at least on weeknights.

Hypothesis 2: It could mean that the women of Washington are getting it, but the getting ain’t no good.

Hypothesis 3: It could mean the theory that there is a relationship between sexual satisfaction and a glowing look is bullshit. But I like the theory, so I reject this hypothesis.

Assuming there is indeed a relationship between sexual satisfaction and the glow on a woman’s face, does this imply the women of Washington are sexually repressed? Does this imply the men of Washington are lame in bed and can’t satisfy a woman to save their lives? And what’s with women over 30? Not one women who looked to be over 30 appeared anything other than dull and lifeless. Are these married women who long since lost the passion? Or are these spinsters who wait in vain for that perfect man?

Whatever is going on, the women of DC do not look like happy people. I don’t know whether to prescribe these women a good therapist, a good anti-depressant, or a good stud lover. But some type of mass intervention is clearly needed for the benefit of all.

The Love Equation

I know everyone thinks of love as an emotion, but I have never been the romantic type. To me, love is very logical. No, I don’t mean people behave logically when they are in love. I mean what makes people fall in and out of love is very logical. Allow me to explain.

Although many people aspire to be more unconditionally loving toward their fellow man, let’s be honest, there are people we like, people we don’t like, people we love, and people we hate. As we meet people throughout our lives, only an extremely small percentage ever win our love. Why is this?

Actually, it’s very simple. We each have our individual needs and desires. When we meet people who fulfill our needs and desires, we like them. If they do a damn good job at it, we fall in love with them. This may make love sound very selfish. Well, there is a good reason for that: love is selfish. If we get what we want, big time, we fall in love (as long as we don’t mind giving back what they want). If we don’t get what we want, or don’t want to give what they want in return, love doesn’t happen.

It’s all very logical. In fact, it can even be expressed as a mathematical formula.

Let’s say a man like Roosh has the following wants in a woman:

1. Nice ass
2. Beautiful face
3. Does not waste his time playing games
4. Does not demand he spend his hard earned money on her
5. Makes interesting conversation
6. Stops making interesting conversation and leaves after sex is over

Then his love formula is:

Nice ass+ Beautiful face+ No games+ Good convo+ No snuggling = Love.

Since this woman doesn’t exist, he hasn’t fallen in love lately.

Let’s say a man like Chaco has the following wants in a woman:

1. Nice ass (hey, great minds think alike)
2. Cute face
3. Highly intelligent
4. Shares mutual interests and outlook on life
5. Gentle disposition devoid of drama
6. Is respectful of Chaco’s need to be The Decider

Then Chaco’s formula, like Roosh’s, is all those things added together = love. Since Chaco has met a woman just like this, he is in love.

Therefore, love is not some random event that strikes us when we least expect it. It’s actually quite predictable according to the formula above. When two people meet who match each other’s formula’s, a deep bond will form.

Understanding this formula is critical for keeping relationships strong. So many couples that fall in love end up falling out of it. Half of all couples who get married and take vows to love each other forever not only end up falling out of love, they often become bitter enemies.

The love equation explains this perfectly. When people start out dating, they usually try their best to win the other’s affection. Men are generous with their money, dress their best, shower women with compliments, and try hard to please sexually. Women wear their best outfits, spend extra time on their makeup, laugh at all of his dumb jokes, try to seem impressed with his ‘power job’, and also try hard to please sexually.

After the relationship has been going on for a while, or worse, after marriage, it’s a different story. Now the partners stop trying in the same way they used to. They get lazy and think that their prior feelings or solemn vows will sustain their relationship. This is a fatal mistake.

Once you recognize that love is based on a very logical formula, it should not surprise you that if you stop trying, the person who used to love you won’t any more. If someone fell in love with you because you matched an equation that looked like:

Cute+ In shape+ Fashionable clothes+ Sweet personality+ Hot sex = Love…

But now you are now like:

Plain+ Out of shape+ Frumpy clothes+ Annoying nag+ No sex = Pain in the ass…

Then I assure you it’s 100% predictable that your relationship will deteriorate and the love will be lost.

Men, you don’t get cut any slack here. If you once matched a formula like:

Handsome+ Buff+ Sharp dresser+ Generous+ Confident leader+ Dominant sex = Love…

But now you are like:

Soft+ Sloppy dresser+ Cheap bastard+ Pussy-whipped beta+ Lame sex = Loser…

Then it’s certain you will be divorced and financing your ex-wife’s trips to Paris with her new lover.

So let’s take the mystery out of love. No more being astounded when the love of your life loses its passion. No more demanding to be loved when you no longer provide what your partner wants. Love is not something you are owed, it is something you earn. If you are in a relationship and want to keep it strong, figure out what your partner values in you and never stop providing it. As long as you match your partner’s love formula, keeping their love is natural and automatic.

You

This post is about you, the Roosh blog reader. After a couple of months at this, I have noticed some things that amuse me greatly. So I got the idea to turn the tables and comment on you and your writing. Below is a list my observations about you. I look forward to reading your comments about yourselves.

1. You think it’s all about you. You demand New Yorker quality writing 5 days a week for 52 weeks of the year. As soon as one post appears that seems to fall short of a Hemingway, you launch into hate. If Roosh is the writer, you tell him he is slipping. If I am the writer, you say I am ruining Roosh’s blog. It’s like you think Roosh and I work for you. My boss is easier going on me than you guys are, and he pays me.

2. You only comment when provoked. If Roosh makes an observation about women that seems less than flattering, all kinds of thoughtful comments and interesting discussion takes place. If there is a mellow post that doesn’t ruffle feathers, then there isn’t much response. If I write something that seems pro-relationship (God forbid), women don’t comment and men say I am a boring married guy who is ruining Roosh’s blog.

3. You get pissed off for being provoked. This is my favorite. You don’t participate unless provoked, but then some of you send hate for provoking you. Make up your minds! Since it’s obvious you guys enjoy being angry and indignant, shouldn’t you thank us for giving you a reason to get pissed off?

4. You love arguing with each other. In fact, some of you seem to get far more joy debating, attacking, and scolding each other than you get from actually commenting on the post itself. I have a feeling I could write a two line post that if controversial enough, could generate 50 comments from all the attacks and counter attacks you would launch against each other.

Roosh has already posted about how this blog came to be. The bottom line is: he does it for own interest and amusement. I do it once per week to help Roosh get a day off and because I thought it would be fun. Being opinionated guys, we like sharing our views. Some of our posts are serious, some are no-so-serious, and some are just silly. But in the end, it is always about posting whatever is on our minds in a way that interests and amuses us.

Guns

I recently signed up for my first NRA gun training class. I will soon be taking the NRA Basic Steps Pistol class. People who have known me for a while would probably be surprised by that. I didn’t grow up around guns and I have not touched a gun in years.

My only experience with guns was back in college. I took a rifle class for P.E. credit. I used to lift weights on my own and I didn’t want to waste P.E. credits on some athletics class, so I figured I would try something different. The rifles in that class were long barrel .22’s meant for target competition. Somehow those rifles didn’t feel like real guns because a .22 is such a small bullet that when fired from a long gun like that, there was no noise at all. It was just a light pull of the trigger and then “click”. I never thought a gun would go “click”. Guns were supposed to go “BOOM!”.

Now that I am in a serious relationship and getting past my college years, it’s looking like I could be a husband and father within 5 years. That realization has caused some powerful “Defend My Family” DNA programing to kick in. I am obsessed with the need to defend my future family from harm. If a bad guy broke into my home and hurt my future wife or children, I would feel like a complete failure as a man.

I know what every anti-gun person is thinking right now. “But guns are dangerous!”…”You could have an accident and shoot yourself!”…”The criminal could steal the gun and use it against you!” Whatever. I could get into a car accident too, but we don’t think of cars as dangerous nor ever suggest a family shouldn’t own one because 40,000 people a year die in car accidents.

The gun control advocates crack me up. Oh sure, let’s ban guns in a nation full of guns. That logic worked pretty well during Prohibition and the War On Drugs, didn’t it? Ban guns and all those guns just disappear like all that marijuana did. And, of course, a gun ban makes all those criminals suddenly stop breaking the law and agree to commit crimes with without them. Great thinking, man.

I suspect this post will piss everyone off because so many people think guns are pure evil. To some, saying one is pro-gun is like saying one is pro-child abuse. I don’t care. I do not intend to throw myself at the mercy of a criminal who invades my home and intends to hurt my family. If I take on the responsibility starting a family, I also accept the responsibility of protecting my family through every legal means at my disposal.

Cosmo

I love Cosmopolitan magazine. For about a year I have been buying Cosmo every month and reading through it with my girlfriend. It’s great fun: articles about sex, pictures of hot girls, lots of lingerie ads. Hell, it’s better than a lot of men’s magazines.

On the late, great, FDDC I used to tell shy guys who couldn’t bust a move on chicks to check out Cosmo for living proof that women love sex and want plenty of it. Case in point, let’s review the cover of this month’s edition:

SEX Uncensored: Your 10 Most Private Questions Answered.
(one of the questions in the article is, “What is the right way to get into 69?”)

BEDSIDE ASTROLOGER 2007: Find Out What’s in Store…in Life, Love, and Lust
(on the 15th my girlfriend’s “inner badgirl is unleashed” by the “brazen Moon”)

Your SEXIEST Haircut Ever
(for inspiration, the article has pictures of movie stars with the “sexiest hair cuts of all time”. Mia Farrow, 1967 anyone?)

Chick Behavior that Baffles the Hell out of Guys
(the list includes why women have 3x as many clothes in their closets as men, but always complain they “have nothing to wear”)

Carmen Electra: Bouncing Back From Heartache
(I didn’t care enough to read that one)

HOT NEW SEX TRICK: This Mind Blowing, Box-Spring Breaking Technique Will Intensify Everything He Feels
(tells girls to slow down and tease a lot before letting their man finish)

How to Decode Your Body’s Signs That Something’s Wrong
(this is the token health tip. I couldn’t be bothered to read it).

PLUS: Make Your Legs Look a Mile Long
(includes fashion tips like “avoid in-between lengths” for jeans and skirts)

What is interesting about Cosmo is the reaction it provokes from women when you mention it to them. Most women SWEAR they don’t read it, but somehow they always seem to know what a recent article said. I knew one women in grad school who swore she hated Cosmo, but when I visited her room discovered several copies of it laying on her dresser. My wonderful girlfriend isn’t immune to the strange love-hate relationship women have with Cosmo. When we are in a store together and I suggest buying the latest edition, she will always say, “Oh no, I don’t want to buy something trashy like that.” But when I buy it myself and bring it home as a present, she will say “Oooh, cool!” and we will soon sit down to our monthly ritual of reading it together. It’s like Cosmo is a guilty, socially inappropriate pleasure, to be indulged in secret but condemned in public.

As far as I am concerned Cosmo serves the highly useful purpose of teaching girls how to look better and be kinkier in bed. As such, I hope women learn to publicly embrace their now clandestine love of Cosmo. Wanting to look hotter and please better can only make the world a better place.

New Year’s Musings

I am sitting here at 10:16PM and I haven’t written anything for my now regular Friday spot. I usually try to find inspiration around mid-week but this week I got caught up in the holiday spirit and never got around to it. My usual routine is to sit down at my computer on Tuesday and think of the something that has been interesting me lately and that fits into the general spirit of Roosh’s blog (male-female dynamics, social commentary, sex, etc). Right now I have nothing and I am just writing stream of consciousness style until I get an idea. By the way, Roosh has never once told what I should or should not write: he gives me complete ‘artistic freedom’ (if you can associate any of this with “art”).

Since this is the last post of 2006, I suppose I could offer some New Year’s thoughts. I have been thinking about New Year’s resolutions lately. I never used to make any, but I think I will this year. I used to think they were lame because I felt personal improvement is something people should do year-round. It shouldn’t be some special once-a-year deal that you forget about by mid-February.

But I have been taking stock of things lately and I decided there are some good habits I would like to develop, and some bad habits I would like to get rid of. So this year, I will make some resolutions. I figure if personal improvement is a year-round thing, there is no reason not to start on January 1, 2007. So here is my list of things I would like to do more of, and things I would like to do less of.

1. Do something for my health every day. It can be lifting weights, yoga, Tai Chi, whatever, just something for my body each day. As my girl said recently, our bodies are the one thing that goes with us no matter where we are, so we should make taking care of them #1.

2. Do something for my mind every day. It can be reading a book, solving a sudoku puzzle, playing chess, anything that makes me think or adds to my understanding of the world. Reading Rooshv.com does not count.

3. Do some relaxation work every day. Deep breathing, meditation, progressive relaxation. Everyone is too tense, including me. ‘Nuff said.

4. Do not do amusing but mindless things like read blogs or look at porn until after I have done the three things above. Nothing against you bloggers (or porn stars) out there, but it’s time to set some priorities.

That’s it. I think if I accomplish those things, even in a small way each day, I’ll be a better person by Januray 1, 2008. I wish everyone luck with their personal goals for 2007, whatever they may be.

Not Wanting What You Wanted

I never have done drugs, so there are a lot of things about drug use that confuse me. But what confuses me most are how people do coke/ecstasy/meth/whatever to get high but don’t think about the crash into depression that comes after. The crash is as much a part of the experience as the high, but nobody ever says “I am going to get high and then get depressed.” People just talk about the high part.

Actually, drugs are not the point of this post. I bring them up because I have noticed a similar phenomenon when it comes to relationships. There is a lot of wanting to get high but ignoring what comes after. More specifically, I have been noticing lately that people desire mates with certain qualities, but never think that there may be a downside to those very same desired qualities.

There are quite a few examples of this. My favorite example of late is when women seek a professionally successful (and therefore wealthy) man for a husband and then express great frustration when he is too busy to spend quality time with the family. Did you read the recent news articles about Goldman Sachs year-end bonuses? Those guys don’t get anywhere in an I-Bank like Goldman by leaving at 5:00PM every night to be home for the family dinner. Want a man with a chance to make partner in a top law firm? Those guys don’t make partner by insisting on time off for PTA meetings. The vast majority of jobs that pay big money also expect you to bust your ass in exchange for all that wealth. Why doesn’t it occur to women that the hot shot MBA who is going to buy them that fabulous Georgetown townhouse isn’t going to have extra time for his son’s little league games?

Men have their own issues with not wanting what they thought they wanted. We know men tend to be attracted to youthful women. I think if you took a survey of men and asked what the ideal age for a wife would be (and you promised you would never reveal their answers any women), I am sure most would say age 18 is perfect. That is, as long as she turned 18 within the last month. But what’s funny is that men who successfully land a young hottie then become driven to near madness from her immaturity. I have been guilty of this myself. In the past few years I have dated some women in their early 20’s and then complained to friends about xyz ridiculous! stupid! childish! thing they did. The usual response from guys is usually something like, “Put that bitch in her place yo!”. The usual response from women is usually something like, “What did you expect, you idiot??” With hindsight, the ladies have a point. Guys, if you like ’em young, go for it, but don’t expect a college girl to show sound and prudent judgment in dealing with you. Expect an impulsive kid raised in an age of instant gratification who was spoiled rotten by excessively indulgent parents.

I could go on and on. Ladies, you want an assertive alpha male with a strong backbone, right? Funny how that alpha male transforms into a macho jerk when he disagrees with you and stubbornly refuses to back down. Fellas, you want that club hottie who wears fashionable sexy clothes? Funny how she transforms into an untrustworthy slut when she flirts with all the club players who hit on her. Ladies, do you like metrosexuals? Funny how they don’t seem so endearing when they insist on different choice of dinner flatware. Ok, instead you want a man’s man who knows how to change a tire just like your dad could? Funny how he think spending all weekend watching football games on TV is a way to spend quality time at home (wearing tapered leg jeans with white sneakers, no less).

I think people would be a lot happier in their relationships if they learned to accept that with every desired quality comes a downside to the very same quality. I am not saying those downsides are a party, but nobody should be surprised when they appear.

Why Are There Still Fat People?

I have been noticing there are a lot of fat people in this country. Sure, I knew this before intellectually, but it’s caught my attention lately because it seems like I am always squeezing myself into a Metro seat next to some really fat person, which I have to do carefully to avoid sitting on the part of them that oozes onto the seat I want to sit in. Having to do this so often got me wondering just how many fat people there are in this country, so I did some internet research and found government statistics on the subject.

The answer: a whole fucking lot.

According to the Centers for Disease Control, 66.5% of adult Americans are overweight. Even worse, half of those are classified as “obese.” If you do the math, that means 1 in 3 of my fellow Americans are obese.

How fat is “obese”? Well, it seems “obese” has some official clinical definition that means “not just fat, but really big ass fat.” According to a Body Mass Index (BMI) table, a girl who is 5’4 (my girl’s height) would have a “healthy weight” if she were between 110 and 140 pounds. She would be considered “overweight” if she were between 146 and 179 pounds. And this little 5’4 girl would be considered “obese” if she were between 175 and 197 pounds.

That’s pretty damn big. I’m not talking about a few extra pounds here. I am not picking on people who stay in shape but are not fitness model perfect. And yes, before The National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance hunts me down, I understand that there are people who suffer from medical conditions they can’t control that make them gain weight. And yes, there are people who have genetics that hardwire them to be fat no matter what they do. My true sympathy goes out to these people.

But what about all of these obese people who could do something about it if they wanted to? It’s not like people don’t know what makes them fat or don’t understand how to be thin. Who living in the midst of the Information Age still doesn’t know that a diet consisting of hot dogs and Ben & Jerrys will make them fat? Ok, maybe there are a few moonshine-selling hillbilly families living in Appalachia who never got the message, but I am convinced that everyone else knows that a sensible diet and exercise are the answer.

If everyone knows how to be thin, why isn’t everyone thin already? After all, we live in a vain, image-conscious society. We Americans spend countless billions every year on clothing, make up and accessories to make us look more attractive (if I were not feeling lazy I would look up even more statistics on consumer spending in these areas). We literally worship the most beautiful people in our society – movie actors, TV stars, fashion models, and turn them into modern day royalty. Our culture is obsessed with physical appearance, so why isn’t the crappy feeling obese people get when they look in a mirror enough motivation for them?

Moreover, it’s well established that we humans select our mates based upon physical characteristics which speak to one’s fitness for producing healthy offspring. In plain English: slender people get laid. I don’t think you would be shocked if I told you the best looking men prefer to date women who are slender. We also know the best looking women usually date men who are somewhere between yoga toned and bodybuilder massive. If the desire for the sex explains a great deal of human behavior, why isn’t the basic need to have sex with hotties enough motivation for people to stay in shape?

So who can explain this to me? Obese people already know everything they need to know to be thin. When obese people look in the mirror, they receive the instant feedback of disliking what they see. If obese people want to mate with a member of the opposite sex, they live a life with fewer, less attractive mating partners at their disposal. So WHY are they still so fat??

Bitch Slappin’ The Boys

Like every other guy, there are times when the ways of women mystify me. But at other times, I must admit, my own gender makes me shake my head in confused wonderment. I am not just talking about the alien force that compels some men to sit in the hot sun watching stock cars drive around an utterly plane oval track for hours on end, hoping someone crashes horrifically to end the boredom. I am talking about the world of romance and dating. Let’s picture two typical dating scenarios:

Scenario #1

You’re in a bar and you notice a girl smiling at you. You smile back, which prompts her to walk over to you and introduce herself. She works hard at keeping the conversation going. She laughs at all your jokes, touches you playfully, and fixes her hair a lot. At closing time she asks you to escort her home. At her door she invites you in to offer you a drink. On the couch at her place, she jumps you and you have wild sex. In response, you notch your belt, tell your friends she is too easy, and never call her again.

Scenario #2

You chat up a cute girl in a coffee shop. You get her number and go out for drinks. Nice conversation follows, she seems cool and interesting. You offer to walk her home, she says there is no need, but you insist, and after some back and forth, she reluctantly agrees. At her front door she stops to say goodnight and you tell her you have to use the bathroom, so she lets you in. After you have pretended to use the bathroom, you sit with her on the couch and bust a move. While making out, she tells you repeatedly that she can’t be up late and needs to work in the morning. She moves your hand away from whatever private part you are attempting to grope. She struggles to keep various pieces of clothing on as you attempt to remove them. Finally, either through exhaustion from fighting off your attempts, eagerness to please this cool new guy she is on a date with, or simply the natural horniness that comes from long sessions of making out and being groped, she relents and sleeps with you. In response, you notch your belt, tell your friends she is too easy, and never call her again.

What’s odd about this is that if both girls above had put up more resistance and denied their men the ultimate prize, the guys might have called again. Guys, does this make any sense? If a girl bangs on the night you met her or on the first date, she is likely to bang the next time you see her, so what exactly is the problem is here?

I’ll never understand this. To me, this kind of bait and switch thing is what we “logical” guys like to blame “emotional” girls for. We guys constantly complain how girls demand we treat them to expensive dinners and flowers, only to decide, after we dutifully comply, that we are “too nice.” They tell us they “have a lot going on right now” and are “too busy to date anyone,” but a few weeks later we see those same girls grinding on some frat boys wearing cowboy hats in Heaven & Hell.

As far I was concerned, I had no problem with a girl who was ready to get busy real quick. When that happened, I just patted myself on the back for having pimp tight game. I mean, hey, I can’t really blame a girl for having sound judgment in men, can I? Once I was done giving myself props, I started making plans to get the good stuff from her again.

When I was playing the game, I wasn’t playing for the love of opening lines, phone numbers, or first dates. I wasn’t spending weekend nights trolling in trashy Adams Morgan bars until 3:00AM for the joy of communing with sweaty, drunken humanity. I wanted the ultimate prize. When I got it, I sure didn’t want to throw it back so fast. I wanted a healthy rate of return on my investment.

Think of how many guys make promises to Satan himself that they will never be nice to a woman again because they got burned by the dinner & flowers trick all through college. Now ask yourself how many girls swear they will make guys wait at least 5 dates before sex because they got burned for giving it up “too soon.” Fellas, does it ever occur to you that if you reward “good behavior,” you’re likely to see a lot more of it?

Respect

A friend was recently telling me a story about a wingman of his. It seems this guy has good game and a lot of balls. He is the type of player who will approach any girl at any time, even if she is with her boyfriend. One time his wingman walked right up to a girl in a bar who was with her boyfriend and totally captivated the girl to the point the wing had his arm around the girl and the girl was totally ignoring her boyfriend. The boyfriend kept trying to get his girlfriend’s attention but she blew him off to keep talking to the player. Finally, in desperation, the boyfriend grabbed his girlfriend and started kissing her in order to ward off the player.

This story got me thinking. It’s pretty obvious the girl above had no respect for her boyfriend. Who knows what her motivation may have been, maybe she was pissed at him for something he did and was getting him back, maybe things were good but she wanted to make him jealous, or maybe she just really dug the payer dude and got lost in a trance with him. But whatever the issue, she massively disrespected her boyfriend.

I could call the girl out for acting like a bitch, which she was doing, but I am more tempted to call the boyfriend out. Bro, how could you let your relationship get to the point where your girlfriend would disrespect you like that? Your girl flirted with another player right in front of your face while she was holding the drink *you* bought her?? When your girl thinks she can get away with that, that tells me you’re doing something very wrong. My philosophy is that men should take responsibility for their relationships. If your girl isn’t treating you right, fix things or get a new girl, but it’s up to YOU to manage your shit.

I really think it would be impossible for my girl to do this to me. I have very clear lines about what I consider disrespectful and if I feel I have been disrespected, my girl finds out very quickly. I think it’s important for guys to have firm rules for how they expect to be treated and they should not be afraid to enforce them. No, I am not talking about ‘pimp slappin your bitch.’ I am talking about being willing to have a direct and firm conversation and not backing down if she argues back. If your girl won’t agree to your lines in the sand, enforce your views by downgrading how well you treat her. If the problems continue, downgrade her from girlfriend to casual sex partner (or from girlfriend to dumped).

I may be coming off like some macho ass, but that is really not my intent. I am usually a big mush ball around my girl. I am extremely affectionate with her, both physically and verbally. In fact, if some of my old wingmen could see me snuggling with her, they would probably grow queasy, shake their heads sadly, and say I will soon be a broken man, sexless and cheated on.

I beg to differ. I can spoil my girl like a princess because when she crosses a line, she gets instant negative feedback. She knows that if there were repeated infractions it would have a serious negative effect on our relationship. I will not be in a relationship that emasculates me. Period. The end result? The number of infractions has decreased to nearly zero and 99% of the time she and I are warm and affectionate with each other. She does her best to please me and I do my best to make her feel loved and cared for. It’s the happiest and most beautiful relationship I have ever been in.

It’s all about respecting yourself and demanding that same respect from your girl. When you have those things in place, you can be as soft as you want and she will never tell her friends you are “too nice.”

Skinny Models? Don’t Blame Me

Every woman, gay man, and metro straight guy knows that there has been yet another scandal over models that are too skinny. I say “yet another” because when Kate Moss hit big in 1993, she started a “waif look” that moved fashion away from the curvy glamor girl era of Cindy Crawford, Claudia Schiffer and Linda Evangelista, toward young skinny girls who ultimately got so thin that people started calling their look “heroin chic.”

The latest episode arose when the city of Madrid banned models that were under a certain weight. How skinny are models these days? Well here are some pictures I found showing back-stage shots at New York’s Fashion Week. Based on these pics, I’d say they are pretty fucking skinny.

Dig these girls: I think the one on the left has ribs that stick out further than her boobs.

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I’d be scared to bang the girls below. I think my manhood would be cut up by their boney insides.

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Oh look, the girl below is eating her one weekly meal!

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So who is to blame for this sorry situation? Within the fashion industry itself, it seems there is much blaming of others, but no one who will accept responsibility. Time states:

Modeling agencies, the motherly folks who inform the models that they can eat or work but not both, say it’s because photographers demand subjects with skin, bones and preferably nothing else. The photographers say it’s the designers who set the limits. Giorgio Armani, one such designer, last week blamed the stylists, the people who put together the looks for the photo shoots at the magazines. The magazines say it’s Hollywood or it’s advertisers or it’s both. And the advertisers say people find their products more desirable when on, next to, or usually just barely covering slender body types.

Let us analyze the above to see if we can figure out just who is guilty. Who are the people in these various categories of the fashion world? Women and gay men, that’s who. Straight male stylists? I don’t think so. In other words, the people promoting the super skinny aesthetic are those who have no sexual interest in women. Oh sure, there may be the occasional lesbian or the brilliant straight guy who gets in to fashion to meet girls and later commits suicide because the girls in fashion don’t eat and the real woman outside of fashion won’t bang him because they think he is gay.

But one thing is for sure: straight guys are not to blame. I apologize to the feminist conspiracy theorists who think that straight men have plotted to create eating disorders in young girls everywhere by promoting unrealistic images of women in the media. Sorry, ladies, you are going to have to find another target for your hate other than straight white men. Those boys like women with curves. It’s your own female sisters and your fabulous gay friends who promote those terrible images, not us.

The evidence? FHM and Esquire magazines both recently named Scarlett Johannson “The Sexiest Woman Alive.” Ever seen Scarlett? This woman eats.

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Now that’s a woman. 100% natural, too. Oh wait, what about her ass you say?

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Ok there, now believe me? Past winners include Jessica Biel and Angelina Jolie, so more curves on those girls too. There is no way girls who starved themselves to Dolce & Gabbana emaciation would ever win this contest. If I could have my personal pick, Jessica Alba, toned yet curvy, would be the sexiest woman alive.

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You girls with with eating disorders can stop paying attention to the beauty aesthetic of gay men and other women. You can stop picking at your salad on dates. You can even order dessert. You want to land a real man? We real men want real women.

What’s It Worth?

When Hedonistic, in a recent thread, asked why guys who only want to pump and dump don’t just hire call girls for $400 per hour, it got me wondering just what kind of girl a guy could actually get for $400/hr (No, I don’t need any call girl services, I got a girl who treats me right). I thought I would do a little research and look at some escort sites. I originally planned to make make a quick clever response in that thread, but what I found deserves a thread of its own. I would like to present some of the results of my research.

[First, before some large men dressed in black hunt me down, every girl selling herself on the web states very clearly that she is only selling her time and companionship, and that no sexual services are implied in the rate charged. Any intimate contact is based on the agreement of two consenting adults and is in no way to be expected.]

Having said that, let us review the market for feminine “charm.”

The Data

To spend time with this 23 year old Spanish hottie, Camilla, you must book a two hour appointment for $2,400 and after that initial visit, you may see her for one hour at the rate of $1,200.

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To enjoy the companionship of this sultry Russian babe, Anastasia, one hour will cost $350.

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If you prefer an all-American cutie like Cindy, her time will cost $250 per hour.

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Have yellow fever and seek an exotic Asian like Saki? That will also be $250 per hour.

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If you like your women “thick”, then Dani will offer you a special rate of $200 before 2:00 PM, but it’s back up to $250 after 2:00 PM. (Hey, her time is precious).

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(no, I am not kidding, I found her out there at those rates).

No discussion of this would be complete without a mention of the high end of the market, for you discriminating gentlemen who seek the finer things in life. Ever want to meet that porn star you found on the internet? Well, one enterprising porn star actually offers men a chance to meet her. She is based in LA but does tours of major cities (she was in DC in early October) and will fly anywhere if travel is covered. Her name is Sarah Blake, she is innocent looking in a “is she really a porn star??” way, and an hour of her time will cost you $1,000 (discounts for multiple hours available).

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And finally, there are the New York/Miami/LA models. This one New York agency does not even list their rates online, but says that the cost of an “introduction fee” to meet a real model “has a comma in the figures”. This is Angelina. You can’t see all of her face, but I have a feeling it looks pretty good.

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The Questions

The pics and rates above forced me to ask myself some questions.

1. There are some really hot women selling themselves. Like “why the fuck aren’t you married to a millionaire?” hot. Why do women who can have any man sell their companionship to many men? Is the money that easy for some women?

2. None of these women look like “the type” to be selling whatever they are selling. It makes me think any decent looking woman, and some not so decent *cough* Dani *cough*, could be doing this. So how many are actually doing this? Were my cute college classmates paying their way through school like this? Are those hotties in the A-crowd clubs blowing off guys who approach because they have four men booked the following day?

3. What is with the pricing for these services?? Dani charges $250 an hour, same as hotties liks Saki and Cindy, but shouldn’t she be paying us? And what’s with Camillia and her $2,400 initial appointment? Yeah, she is cute for sure, but one sees girls of her level out all the time. Maybe she is engaging in luxury pricing – making something seem more valuable by charging an inflated price for it.

4. How many men will look at the pics above and never approach a regular girl again? How many girls will look at the hourly rates above and quit their day jobs tomorrow? How many wives who have “lost their passion” will see the hot young girls available to their husbands and rediscover their libido instantly?

Finally, here’s some math for us guys in relationships. In order to get as much “companionship” from girl at Cindy or Saki’s rates to match what a guy gets from his girlfriend in one year (say 3 per week x 50 weeks = 150 per year), he would need to spend $37,500 over 12 months. At Anastasia’s rates, $52,500. And at Camilla’s, $180,000. Having a girlfriend is more economical.