In the past couple of years the quantity of girls I sleep with has crept up. This is due to many reasons I’m sure, but during that same time period I notice that I’m “rejecting” a lot more girls. By that I mean I walk away when I find out that she isn’t close to what I want. I may be talking to her and the light from her cell phone screen reveals some acne. Or I realize she doesn’t have a fun vibe. Or she’s socially awkward. Or her black dress was hiding a pancake ass. Or she’s way too witty (at the expense of being sexy). When one of these things happen, I politely end the conversation. No hard feelings.
There was a time I used to keep these interactions going because, ultimately, the girl was bangable—or else I wouldn’t have approached her—and I was hungry for sex, since I didn’t get it as often. But I rarely did bang those girls. It would stall at the number or makeout stage. Why is that I’m going full court press on far fewer girls today, but getting a lot more bangs in shorter amounts of time? Two reasons:
1. I free up more time for the girls I better connect with. Talking to a girl you’re not crazy about means you won’t spit your best game. And without your best game the odds you’ll bang her, assuming she’s not throwing herself on you, is extremely low. It’s futile to force the attraction if you don’t feel it around the 5-10 minute mark. In these cases you’ll only get a number.
Time is crucial. I still run most of my game at night during the weekends and each night has, at most, four hours of prime game time. If I spend ninety minutes on these mediocre interactions, I’ve given up 38% of my night for nothing. Plus my energy will be lower for the better prospects I may encounter later. If you’re a game newbie then grinding it out can be valuable to getting your social skills up to speed, but it’s very possible that talking to the boring chick with the lame sense of humor will cost you for that entire night. It’s too risky to exchange an extra word with a girl that I know deep down is someone who won’t get me excited. That time is better spent maintaining your state with your boys instead.
2. It subconsciously increases your value. When you pass on enough girls, you start to believe you’re the man. Of course with my experiences I think I’m a pimp, and that shines through with my body language and tone, without me having to think about it.
Girls pick up on things that you cannot see, hear, or feel (think of them as a mutant species that can sense more than three dimensions of space). Luckily for us, we don’t have to consciously learn how to subcommunicate these positive traits—we pick up on them in time. This is how I can meet a guy and within about 15 seconds know if he’s good with women or not (a side effect of my heavy involvement with the game has given me the female ability to screen men). Now imagine what type of vibe a guy who tries to bang anything he talks to puts out. You better believe that girls can pick up on that.
For me there has to be something in those first 10 minutes that tells me there’s something special going on. There has to be humor and laughing, meaningful questions, flirty looks, and a magnetism simmering underneath the surface. My energy and time are the two most important things I have, and when I begin to value it yourself by passing on mediocre chicks, I get more. In the end it’s so much easier to bang a cool chick. Don’t waste your time on those who aren’t.