I want to share with you an epiphany I had years ago. I was trying to bang this girl and she was being very flakey and taking forever to get back to me. I asked my friend what I should do about it and we proceeded to go over my options after I told him everything that had transpired so far.
At the end I thought, “Is she doing this with her friends right now? Is she asking her friend how to get with me? Is she asking her friend how to get me to stop flaking?”
Of course not.
Even though she wasn’t treating me well, I was still chasing her. Even though she was barely encouraging me, I wanted her bad. It’s human nature.
If you eavesdrop on conversations with girls, you will hear them talk about guys that are flakes. Guys that don’t call. That put in the minimum amount of work. That don’t give much notice on dates and then cancel them at the last minute. That fuck the girl and then make an excuse to leave within minutes. You think that guy is stressing over the girl? You think he’s asking his friends for help? No, he’s too busy working on other girls. He doesn’t care about any of them. He has no attachments. With no attachments he doesn’t do the pathetic, desperate, needy shit that 95% of other guys do.
I realized then that I had to BE THAT GUY, and not the guy who plots and tries and talks about what to do next. Because the moment you have to try is the moment you care, and the moment you care is the moment she has you, and all you’ll have is your hand, waiting for the phone to ring.