Argentine nightlife is much different than in the U.S. You go out here at the time clubs back at home close, making for an interesting cat-like sleep schedule. After 6AM you can party until the next afternoon by going to a series of afterhour clubs. (Some clubs only serve the purpose of being the after after club.) The longest I could go was until 8AM. There is a point you just look at the people still dancing and say, “This is stupid I’m not even horny anymore,” and hail a cab with the sun in your face. The endurance champion is this Argentine guy named Flaco. Once I remember him and his crew stayed out until 9AM and then went straight to the pool until 2PM. They all collapsed when they came back, reeking of beer and chlorine.
They funny thing is that most people have regular jobs. Many times I’m talking to someone in a club and they inform me they have to be at work in two hours.
Mitre. If you don’t want to meet any girls over 22 then come here. Music is top notch with a good mix of just about everything except salsa. This is the easiest place to find 16-year-olds, if you are into that sort of thing (that would be a birth date in the 90’s). Go starting on Thursday. $4 cover with beer.
Pobre Diablo. The after hours club that reminds me of Club 5 in DC. Don’t go here unless you already have a chick because there are packs of really drunk guys giving one last ditch effort to get laid. At least the average Argentine guy is more friendly and less belligerent than the average American guy. (I’ve been in Argentina for over a month and have yet to see a club fistfight.) $3 cover for guys.
Dorian Gray. Relatively new club that is popular on Saturday nights. Main floor plays house and a smaller room plays retro and even some hip hop. A little weird with the transsexuals walking around but I’ve had the most luck with Cordoba girls here. $5 cover with beer.
Club F. Way out in the boonies but worth it. I still have more traveling to do but this is the hottest collection of girls I’ve seen anywhere (sorry Gotica). Because no gringos make it out here your status will get you farther than back in town. Downside is that catching a cab back is so difficult that you may have to find a bus (people get so desperate that they throw themselves in front of cabs). Still, it doesn’t get better than this. Go on Saturday. $5 cover with beer.
Rondeau Street Bars. Several blocks of just bars and clubs. The clubs are smaller than the ones above but they have friendlier girls. Don’t be scared to approach large groups of girls sitting down. There is also a few bars around where Fuctuoso Rivera turns into Larranaga. It’s dead here from Sunday until Tuesday.
Listen! Yeah there is an exclamation point in the name. Pretty decent bar that is just what I’ve been looking for: a club/bar combo. Plus there are no other gringos. The girls here are much friendlier than what you’d find in a nearby megaclub such as…
MDM (pronounced Madame). Me and three other gringos skipped the one block line when I said I was doing a review for the Washington Post. I don’t believe that worked, especially since I was wearing a cowboy hat. I have a feeling this club used to be a factory judging by the huge chimney stack in the back. It’s now a pussy factory, with more hot girls in one place than entire U.S. cities. Unfortunately there are more guys to match them and the girls here have an attitude problem, especially after 3:30AM or so. In fact, one of my wingmen got violently slapped. It was kind of my fault when I accidentally pushed his hand on a girl’s ass, but still, he didn’t have to squeeze. We should have stayed at Listen! $3 cover with beer.
One thing I really like about Argentine clubs is that there isn’t the obsession on making a buck with table service, though I’m sure it’s just a matter of time until that changes. Missing are those guys who want you to look at them because they are able to pay a 700% premium on a bottle of “French” vodka that a French person has never heard of.
Now I go to Buenos Aires.
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