Cosmo

I love Cosmopolitan magazine. For about a year I have been buying Cosmo every month and reading through it with my girlfriend. It’s great fun: articles about sex, pictures of hot girls, lots of lingerie ads. Hell, it’s better than a lot of men’s magazines.

On the late, great, FDDC I used to tell shy guys who couldn’t bust a move on chicks to check out Cosmo for living proof that women love sex and want plenty of it. Case in point, let’s review the cover of this month’s edition:

SEX Uncensored: Your 10 Most Private Questions Answered.
(one of the questions in the article is, “What is the right way to get into 69?”)

BEDSIDE ASTROLOGER 2007: Find Out What’s in Store…in Life, Love, and Lust
(on the 15th my girlfriend’s “inner badgirl is unleashed” by the “brazen Moon”)

Your SEXIEST Haircut Ever
(for inspiration, the article has pictures of movie stars with the “sexiest hair cuts of all time”. Mia Farrow, 1967 anyone?)

Chick Behavior that Baffles the Hell out of Guys
(the list includes why women have 3x as many clothes in their closets as men, but always complain they “have nothing to wear”)

Carmen Electra: Bouncing Back From Heartache
(I didn’t care enough to read that one)

HOT NEW SEX TRICK: This Mind Blowing, Box-Spring Breaking Technique Will Intensify Everything He Feels
(tells girls to slow down and tease a lot before letting their man finish)

How to Decode Your Body’s Signs That Something’s Wrong
(this is the token health tip. I couldn’t be bothered to read it).

PLUS: Make Your Legs Look a Mile Long
(includes fashion tips like “avoid in-between lengths” for jeans and skirts)

What is interesting about Cosmo is the reaction it provokes from women when you mention it to them. Most women SWEAR they don’t read it, but somehow they always seem to know what a recent article said. I knew one women in grad school who swore she hated Cosmo, but when I visited her room discovered several copies of it laying on her dresser. My wonderful girlfriend isn’t immune to the strange love-hate relationship women have with Cosmo. When we are in a store together and I suggest buying the latest edition, she will always say, “Oh no, I don’t want to buy something trashy like that.” But when I buy it myself and bring it home as a present, she will say “Oooh, cool!” and we will soon sit down to our monthly ritual of reading it together. It’s like Cosmo is a guilty, socially inappropriate pleasure, to be indulged in secret but condemned in public.

As far as I am concerned Cosmo serves the highly useful purpose of teaching girls how to look better and be kinkier in bed. As such, I hope women learn to publicly embrace their now clandestine love of Cosmo. Wanting to look hotter and please better can only make the world a better place.

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dmt
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tear

brown cow
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Just before clicking onto this site, I was about to stop myself. I said to myself, “This is like Cosmo. It is a guilty pleasure that serves as mild entertainment. And though it can be enlightening, I really don’t get anything fulfilling out of it.” For the record, I pick up Cosmo about twice a year. The articles are the same every month – just reworded. But I went onto this site anyway, and coincidentally, Chaco has written something about Cosmo. I was thinking Cosmo in my head and reading the word Cosmo in my head at the same time. It was a strange sensation.

rebecca
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Cosmo’s sex tips are crap. A good portion of the articles are crap. But the sex tips seriously are the same ALL the time. They just break them down differently. And the tips are all about making sex mind-blowing for the guys. Whatev. Sex involves (at least) two people. Why don’t we focus on making it mind-blowing for all involved?

LMNt
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Cosmo definitely entertains me.

Greedy
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Dude you can do better than this. You’re not going to learn anything about women from Cosmo, nor are you going to gain any insight from any woman who reads Cosmo. In fact, you should view any woman who gleefully reads Cosmo with strong suspicion.

Most people know that everything in Cosmo is crap and recycled month-to-month, it’s the female version of Men’s Health (“15 tips to blow her mind in bed!” . . . “How to get ripped abs in 2 weeks” . . . and so forth).

In fact, Cosmo’s articles and alleged research behind them have been exposed as being pure fabrication. The magazine’s authors will literally blurt suggested sex “tips” to random men on the street, chalk up a Y/N answer in a spreadsheet, and somehow fart/convert that into a magazine column.

I hate to be a dick, but this really is an amateur post on an otherwise excellent blog. I hope your future posts do a better job, Chaco.

Gunslingergregi
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Wife used to make fun of Cosmo as in the magazine is tame on how many O’s the woman is having in the first couple years of a relationship. Then it slowed down like it seems everyone does when real life gets in the way. Why relationships should only go for 1 and a half years and skip the normal everyday part, and keep the exciting in Love part as a memory. Can always go 3 times a day with a new woman. How do you keep that passion up for 10 years….

Roissy
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without children to keep the artifice stable, the average relationship lasts about 2 years. longer childless LTRs are usually the result of a low value woman clinging to a higher value man who himself is too lazy to risk disrupting the comfort of the LTR and who may think he has all the time in the world to dawdle; or, it happens when two very low value partners gloomily realize they are better off with each other than alone without each other.

it is very rarely the case that a high value woman with a low value man stay together much longer than the time it takes for the initial burst of novelty sex and gauzy rose-colored glasses to wear off.

it’s absolutely true that for men the sex is way more exciting when it’s a carousel of fresh pussy every three months. it is not as true for women, who find sexual fulfillment grows in proportion to the emotional closeness they feel for their man.

the downside to leaving LTRs while the passion still rages and the mundane has yet to take hold is that while the memories linger charged with the voltage of eros the pain of the split hits with the force of a sledgehammer. it’s easy to romanticize a doomed union when there was never anything tawdry to pollute it.

KassyK
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Roissy I have to disagree with that. Maybe for people in their 30s and above its like that but I know lots of people in their 20s that just aren’t ready to get married and enjoy the pleasure of someone’s company as a partner and have been together 3,4,5 years and STILL don’t want anyone else. These are successful, emotionally stable, attractive people on both ends.

People do fall in love and love DOES last for more than 2 years for many people, even without children.

Your view on relationships and why people are in them is so bleak…it makes me sad, yet again.

Some people just don’t believe in marriage ever and don’t want to have kids ever but love their S.O. It happens. All the time.

KassyK
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PS I know many guys that don’t want new “pussy” every 3 months unless the girls are throwing themselves at the guy. Some guys (mostly on this site) seem to be prowlers and very predatory in terms of how their view women and lots of guys I know have no interest in the game. They are tired of it.

Thats a romanticized ideal in many guy’s heads…but in reality its draining. A new partner every 3 months? That’s more dull than the same person for the rest of your life.

Never truly knowing someone and getting just close enough to having real feelings and then buh-bye? I’d rather not date for 3 years.

wrytexan
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Roissy \ n 1: A perceptive and honest person

Roosh
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“…lots of guys I know have no interest in the game. They are tired of it.”

The game is life.
Life is the game.

Either they weren’t good at it or had a very narrow definition of what the game really is.

As you’ve read in Chaco’s other posts, game still has a strong place in long-term relationships. It’s naive to think that it ever ends.

Gunslingergregi
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Roiss poignent as always. Although I think at the year mark is when it starts to go down and then by 1 year 6 months it would be ok to say good bye. Ideally though any woman you would stick with for a year and a half would be marriage material it’s just that we need to go ahead and change the rules on that to more than one wife 🙂 The passion fades and you still like that person but you may want to also experience a fresh relationship with another woman. Not saying that you couldn’t still love the first one or care about what happens to that person, just in a different way. Working within the framework of traditional marriage rules as the U.S. words them doesn’t seem to be working. It’s just another case where we are told that both side of the equation are equal. Then proceed to word the laws so that one side has all the rights and one does not. I think Kassey is right a lot of guys are tired of the game. The game of life (in real life) seems to play out where there is a redistribution of wealth from the man to the woman (and to lawyers) after a marriage is terminated. Hearing cliches like money is not the most important thing in the world. Then saying that a man who doesn’t pay child support is hurting the child. The child support given or not is hurting the mother more than the child. It is also hurting the man financially. Who normally gets stuck with bills (or should I say who takes the responibility for paying them. Divorce sets people back so far it is unreal. It is amazing how unfair the courts are to men who get divorced. Which puts woman in an unfairly dangerous situation. When you put an animal in a corner with no way out fight or flee kicks in. A dad who wants to be involved will more than likely help out with money for the child. A (deadbeat dad) who doesn’t want to help. Should he really be forced to help. Wouldn’t it be better to just let the person leave who wants to leave rather than forcing them to keep a financial attachment to a relationship that is over. Do the woman just want to punish the men for being married to them and make it difficult financially to support another family, or is it just all the other people making money off of divorce? I will admit that my parents raised me not to have kids until I was ready. I still havn’t. Although I have been married and seperated. I would take my ex back because I do love her just not into a house with a normal marriage relationship. I’m passionate about the laws being changed because I see the carnage from marriage’s with children all the time. The horrable relationship never ends. They never get closer until the child support stops. They are always in an enforced perverse relationship with the spouse for years.

Gunslingergregi
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Ok that was a long post. I pretty much have read the whole site. Interesting points have been brought up by you folks.

BG
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of course roosh doesnt mind chaco contributing to the blog. Not only does he get to take Friday off, he gets to look like a better blogger each week in comparison. Smart move roosh.

Mandy
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Roissy, for what it’s worth, I think that the game gets boring. If you think long-term relationships are artificial, what about the artifice and superficial side of the club/bar scene? There’s a lot to be said about dating someone who is compatible to the point where you’re best friends…you can be honest about your sexual needs, add novelty when you need it and more importantly, you have someone on your side whom you can trust and love during lonely times.

dmt
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btw, I cry because a cool site has become a pussy shitty one, and that deserved a posting of mourning.

mhm
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“of course roosh doesnt mind chaco contributing to the blog. Not only does he get to take Friday off, he gets to look like a better blogger each week in comparison.”

It is pretty damn clever.

Roosh
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Chaco is here to stay as long as he wants to say. anonymous opinions mean nothing to me.

Liz
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Blogging: Serious Business.

Roissy
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“guys I know have no interest in the game. They are tired of it.”

it’s not the game that is tiring; it’s failure at the game. for the guy who knows what he is doing and finds the task of picking up hot women exciting rather than draining, there is much pleasure in the pursuit. note: most guys do not fall in that category.

“Your view on relationships and why people are in them is so bleak?”

just because we can peer at the gears of the watch doesn’t mean there isn’t beauty in the face of time.

“A new partner every 3 months? That’s more dull than the same person for the rest of your life.”

spoken like a true woman.
don’t ever change.
you know, while i said sex with new women every 3 months is exciting, i didn’t say it was necessarily fulfilling. fucking on the side is best served as appetizer to a truly fantastic main course.

“what about the artifice and superficial side of the club/bar scene?”

everything in life is an elaborate artifice. your mistake, mandy, is in thinking you can box that artifice into contexts upon which you refuse to confer legitimacy.

“of course roosh doesnt mind chaco contributing”

chaco knows the score. don’t let his softer-edged, commercially-savvy approach fool you.