Reenactment: Did You Fuck On My Couch?

PREVIOUS REENACTMENTS:

I recently had a one-night stand with a girl on her friend’s couch. The friend continued to date a buddy of mine so I saw her out regularly. At the bar one night she asked me if I really did have sex on her couch. I was hesitant to tell her. See for yourself…

Over 80% of girls I’ve fucked since coming back in May have been one-night stands. The irony of getting good at seduction is that you eliminate the seduction part and get right to sex. Then you start feeling shallow and hope for a worthy challenge, but when you get that challenge you whine about it and ache for easy sluts again. It’s a vicious cycle that tells me I definitely have a preference for sluts.

I did a Twitter survey where I posed the following question to my followers:

Here are the shocking results:

Wanting anything else may mean you have some feminist deprogramming left to do. Praying for a long-term relationship with an American woman who likely doesn’t have the upbringing—and therefore tools—to provide you with happiness in said relationship is eminently beta. You might as well buy girls white Fossil watches as gifts before you even bang.

Compared to all my previous reenactments, this one translated into the most real-life laughs. I actually became friends with the couch owner (I don’t even talk to the slut I banged due to reasons not related to her sluttiness).

Reenactment Contest Update:

Just a reminder that you have until Wednesday at noon to submit your reenactment video to [email protected] I’m upping the ante on the grand prize: the winner will now get a paperback copy of A Dead Bat In Paraguay and a $20 Amazon gift certificate. I’m now allowing two submissions per person, which could double your chances of winning (or losing). See the original contest post for more details.

Out of all the submissions I’ve received so far, the biggest flaw is that they’re way too short. If you’re not hitting a minute in length, you’re not producing an engaging situation that will get a lot of laughs. If you create something on par with my videos, you’ll have a solid shot at winning.

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virgle Kent
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Oh no you didn’t just use a Jersey Shore reference… sneaky

craig | travelvice.com
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(laughing) – So damn nosey. Like a high school girl. Mind your own business.

craig | travelvice.com’s last blog post: Collecting and Cooking Giant Clams.

The Rookie
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The Rookie
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“my bare ass cheeks on your leather couch”

classic

The Rookie’s last blog post: BCN: Saturday Night in Style.

Carl Sagan
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Carl Sagan
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You might as well buy girls white Fossil watches as gifts before you even bang.

That was a humorous episode last night.

Tazzy Bee
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Tazzy Bee
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‘You might as well buy girls white Fossil watches as gifts before you even bang.’

http://pw0nd.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/what-you-did-there-i-see-it.jpg

Realdeal
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Realdeal
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almost the last 6 lays I got were variations of one night stands…it seems that relationships these days only materialize after casual sex.

it is actually harder to get a gf in the traditional route as most girls are eager for quick sex in order to “test drive” the guy for chemistry.

It seems that western women are more and more impulsive when it comes to their sexuality. I am more and more becoming a “pump and dump” type of guy…

whorefinder
Guest

Roosh, you totally suckered that slut in and then hit her with pocket aces on the river. Just sayin’ the “high five” had rollin’, and if I’d been at the bar and overheard you, I would have given you the high five.

Classic.

whorefinder’s last blog post: Hookers are flaky, unprofessional bitches..

gramercy
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gramercy
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I’d like some advice on what to do when a girl you have a one-night stand with tells you not to tell anyone about it because she doesn’t want people to think you’re a slut. It seems like an imposition: why shouldn’t I be able to speak the truth about what happened? If I hide it, I also throw away the social proof it might bring.

spaceman
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spaceman
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OMG that is so gross

super LOL

gramercy
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gramercy
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Oops, “because she doesn’t want anyone to think she’s a slut”.

Vincent Ignatius
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Please keep these coming. I nearly pissed myself laughing at this.

“You may want to disinfect it. High five!”

Vincent Ignatius’s last blog post: Asian Alpha.

craig | travelvice.com
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hehe, I think you style is catching on:
http://media.uselessjunk.com/videos/flv/085723_typical_day_on_MFC.flv

craig | travelvice.com’s last blog post: Keep Your Camel Ride to Yourself.

craig | travelvice.com
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(that video above — which is a chat session — has me laughing out loud every time I watch it.)

craig | travelvice.com’s last blog post: Keep Your Camel Ride to Yourself.

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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You fucking faggot. Everyone already saw that MFC video. People act like it is fucking new or some shit. What are you going to post next? Fucking faggot.

craig | travelvice.com
Guest

@13 – ahh, so that was you in the clip then, was it? Sorry that keeps getting passed around. We’re clearly an insensitive bunch, openly laughing at your chat log and all.

craig | travelvice.com’s last blog post: Dining on Red Sea Clams.

Neo
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Neo
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Hilarious.

Neo’s last blog post: Tattoo chick..

gunslingergregi
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gunslingergregi
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lol roosh I just read that in your book you saved 35k for the trip.

Why did ya have to lie.

See what I mean about lies and how eventually you lie to even yourself lol

gunslingergregi
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gunslingergregi
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Or did you lie about the 35k

Either way he he he

trackback

[…] Roosh – “American Girls Don’t Use Condoms Anymore“, “Favela Redux“, “Reenactment: Did You Fuck on My Couch?” […]

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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can someone explain to me why rape is illegal? i can’t figure out why there are even laws for rape.

Willy Wonka
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That shit was hilarious.

“The irony of getting good at seduction is that you eliminate the seduction part and get right to sex. Then you start feeling shallow and hope for a worthy challenge, but when you get that challenge you whine about it and ache for easy sluts again. It’s a vicious cycle that tells me I definitely have a preference for sluts.”

Damn. There’s a lot of truth in that.

Willy Wonka’s last blog post: P90X Round 2: P104X Plus.

Marmot
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Marmot
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I just saw this video… roflmao!!! The first time that I watched any of the series!

Turn my vote in the survey about reentactments to “yes, more please!” grin

Lurker
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Lurker
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Holy fuck that was funny hahahhahaha. I laughed so hard at the sweaty ass cheeks comment.