Funemployment

I remember not too long ago I would count the days until the weekend arrived. But now every day is the weekend! I present to you my average weekday:

11:30: Roll out of bed, shower. Do a 30 minute Spanish audio lesson. Eat breakfast/lunch. Check local blogs, Washington Post, Huffington Post.

2:00: Walk to Starbucks at nearby strip mall. The baristas welcome me and my “shift,” which averages between 4-6 hours, spent writing or editing on my laptop, reading books, and staring off into space. Total cost is $4 (tall americano and warmed lemon iced cake). Sometimes I study Spanish or run various chores (e.g. getting my car ready for sale.) If it’s Monday or Thursday, I go for a 3-4 mile run (8 minute miles).

7:00: Go home and eat like a king (my stepmom cooks Persian food every weeknight). Spend quality family time.

After dinner, sometimes I drive to the late-night Barnes & Noble in Rockville, drink with friends, or try to make intimacy with some broad. But if I stay home…

9:00: Tinker with blog. Put finishing touches on the next day’s blog post, making sure there are no errors since I will be sleeping when it goes live. Reply to emails. Read Slate, Digg, Reddit, TPM, NY Times, and various message boards. Browse internet videos. Chat on AIM. Download music and porn torrents.

12:30am: Eat third meal of the day. Do another 30 minute Spanish audio lesson. Read some more. Watch a Netflix movie.

2:30: Productivity rapidly declines. I start to check sites I already checked, hoping for something new. Contacts getting dry.

3:00-4:00: Sleep.

*all times are approximate

I’m productive for about 6-8 hours a day, where I do more than just eating, shitting, and masturbating (i.e. existing), as opposed to 2-3 hours a day when I had a job. Most of what I’m doing right now will not have a monetary payoff, but I’m enjoying myself and it feels like my awesomeness is increasing at a more rapid pace. This isn’t for everyone though: the average person needs a lot of entertainment to get through the day without experiencing boredom. Movies and books will not be enough. If you don’t have an interest that take up several hours a day at minimal cost, being funemployed may not be as great for you as it is for me.

Not only is shit getting done, but life is slowing down in the process. I don’t know what the date is and clock time has become a rigid abstraction. From now on I will be needing at least a one hour arrival window for appointment and dates.

Related Posts For You

  • No related posts
newest oldest most voted
ribald
Guest
ribald
Offline

Beautiful!!

kayla
Guest
kayla
Offline

mmmm persian food….

Generate
Guest
Generate
Offline

Glad to see you enjoying yourself. You sound much happier man. If you do ever get bored with this routine you, don’t rule out getting a job. I’ve found that many times the jobs you usually hate are not due to the work itself but the people you work with. There is sure to be another place you can work where you will be happy (one which will also provide you with steady income). In the meantime, keep enjoying life.

Sweat P.
Guest
Sweat P.
Offline

You should read Salon too.

Some Catchy Chic
Guest
Some Catchy Chic
Offline

Sounds like the life.

phi
Guest
phi
Offline

sounds like college/high school life without all crap to bring you down.

vb
Guest
vb
Offline

12:30-2:20am online poker!

mm
Guest
mm
Offline

sounds kinda routine…maybe switch up the beverage/pastry to add a little spice?

Roissy
Guest
Roissy
Offline

roosh, i have a friend whose past 8 months are almost identical to what you are planning to do with your life now. he quit his cushy but unfulfilling career last summer, ended his lease, sold all his material possessions, and with his savings embarked on a wandering semi-global journey to parts of south america and all across the US, experiencing as much as he could and hoping to use the experiences as a map to his mission in life. He couch-surfed along the way and settled in the southwest for the last three months where he took a couple of odd jobs to generate some income. being an ivy league grad with a solid work history, he has some funny stories about employers not believing his resume when he applied for jobs at the local video and sex shops. he is around your age.

he also wrote a blog during his journeys, but found it hard to keep up because the experiences he needed to generate raw material for the blog were taking up all his free time.

i’ve spoken to him recently, and he’s now actively looking for a real job and a place to settle down. i don’t know if he’s found his purpose, but he doesn’t regret a bit of what he did.

Tater Salad
Guest
Tater Salad
Offline

I was unemployed for three months in the Summer of ’04. Best Summer Ever (granted, I had a three month paid vacation as I got a nice severance package).

I did need constant entertainment/activities or I would go crazy from bordom. Thus I golfed every day, traveled and began the search for a condo to buy. My game improved drastically, I saw alot of my friends all over the country/world and bought my first condo.

good luck with it

Mr Boofu
Guest
Mr Boofu
Offline

Anybody ever been to Tucson Arizona??? Thinking about moving out into the desert where life is slow.

miik
Guest
miik
Offline

I used a 70 day stretch (between jobs) to go across the country in my Jeep. One well spent month was used following the California Coast. Climbing around the Big Sur -Monterey Coast was awesome!

I saved some money sleeping in the back of the Jeep (tinted windows), and by going to gyms to workout (and use their showers). So I splurged elsewhere *including the Southwest – NM, Sedona AR, and San Francisco when a gf flew out) While I was away I wired my house payments.

Things I learned:

You really do have plenty of time (in life) if you get your head on straight.

There are pretty women all over the country.

People are friendly everywhere if you’re real.

When you have it all together you are really attractive you don’t want to settle for less.

Take MORE trips.

Peace

Jinxy
Guest
Jinxy
Offline

¿Qué tal su español? ¿Así así o mejor?

Estoy un poco aburrido con mío.

Tengo dos más meses antes de voy a mí pais.

Yo no puedo esperar.

Lo. Qué. Sea.

Escuché que las mujers en Americá del Sur son muy bonita.

Buena suerte. Cuentenos cuando a usted tiene tiempo en sus viajes.

Vaya con huevos.

J.

tampa
Guest
tampa
Offline

I sit on my ass every single day.

I own my own business. Run that shiznit from home..

Only time I get up off my butt is when I have meetings with clients.

That is about ten total hours a week.

80K later….im stoked.

Who needs the corporate run around.

sherwin
Guest
sherwin
Offline

Beeyah yekamee ghormeh sabzi bokhor! Akh gorboonet beram man!

Yeders
Guest
Yeders
Offline

oh thats awesome. the holiday I’d like to be on. not long.. 8 weeks.