Girls Getting Back With Ex-Boyfriends

Many times a girl has dated me after ending a serious relationship and then dived back into the arms of the ex-boyfriend when I put on the brakes. I have nothing to worry about as long as these girls don’t turn gay, but I think I know what this could mean.

1. They can’t cut it in the dating scene. It’s brutal out there. Telephone calls that aren’t being returned, lonely men sitting at the bar waiting for a date that will never show up, statements being wildly misinterpreted, and testicles exploding from too much internal pressure. This scene is like an underground drug den with dirty needles on the ground and zombies walking around with infected veins (emotions) that will never heal. The death blow is that last rejection that prompts the sad but inevitable “Is there something wrong with me” pity party. The fragile human ego has not evolved to handle the volume of rejection and disappointment seen in modern dating.

2. They don’t like being ultra-dominated in bed. I think a little bit of pain mixes quite well with pleasure because it makes that pleasure even better. I’m talking about contact with the cervix, bright-red hand imprints on asses, and neck-jerking hair pulling. Every girl is born to like this, but some take a few extra years to break away from feminist programming to fully enjoy being handled like a real woman. And it works both ways: when a girl is on top of me and doing that around-the-world move where it feels something is about to snap off, you don’t hear me whining like a little bitch. I can take the pain, just please don’t lean too far back.

The getting-back-with-the-ex phenomenon is common American behavior. A break-up is not the break-up but which break-up—just one of several that drags on a relationship past its shelf date. I look at it like this: if Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith couldn’t make it work a second time, then no one can. Unless something intrinsic about the environment or the personalities involved changes, the second and third and fourth break-ups will be low-budget sequels destined for the bottom shelf at the video store. You shake your head at the cover of Police Academy VIII and wonder, “Why did they bother?”

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KassyK
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Firstly–what the hell does being dominated in bed have to do with anything? I love that and so does my man and I get that with my boyfriend and vice versa. Thats one of the best pluses of our sex life. Our sex is ridiculously hot.

For me, “Unless something intrinsic about the environment or the personalities involved changes” is a great statement, though.

My ex and I got back together after a YEAR–not just a month or a few months…and that is exactly what happened. We are happier than we have ever been bc we have made those changes and learned and grew and came back to each other.

KassyK
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🙂

Land-Man
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Women: Just zip it about how hot your sex life is. No one cares and i’m sure it isn’t that hot.

Dirk Diggler
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Yup, she’s still a whore. Wonder how much of a cum bank she was during that year? Never mind. Don’t care.

KassyK
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Land-Man: Point taken. Just responding to the post but either way…

mm
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You couldn’t pay me to get back with one of my exs. What’s done is done. I like to think that there are many new men out there, just waiting to date someone for a few months and then get dumped. It’s like Pokemon. Gotta catch ’em all.

Kidding, of course.

eugenius
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KK..Why do you think this post is about you?

mike says
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It’s the comfort factor. It’s easier to go back to the devil (penis) you know then go out and find a strange new one attached to a whole slew of new issues.

KassyK
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Eugenius–I don’t think its about me? I actually think this is a decent post. I am just saying that girls dont go back to their exes bc they dont like dominant sex? Thats the weirdest thing I have ever heard.

terps
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guess I’m not truly American because I don’t get back with exes. sure, my exes have tried to get back with me, but no… I’m a one-shot deal. girl gets one shot with me, and if she screws it up it’s over. likewise if I screw it up, I don’t go groveling saying that “I’ve changed, it won’t happen again bla bla”

Jay Gatsby
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I didn’t really understand how the whole dominance-submission part fit in the post either. That said, I do agree that it’s far easier for women to run back to their ex-boyfriends (especially if such women are the ones who broke off things) when the going gets tough in the dating scene. In fact, I’d hazard to guess that they boomerang for a few months or a even a year, only to break up with their boyfriends again when the next Mr. Right comes along. Some women are like monkeys — they don’t let go of one branch until they have a firm grip on the next.

Dirk Diggler
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Some women? All women.

irina
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yea umm sometimes people love each other and they’d rather put up with each other’s crap than date other assholes.

me
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“Some women are like monkeys — they don’t let go of one branch until they have a firm grip on the next.” This is not only hilarious but is often times very true. It can be hard sometimes if you still have feelings for somebody to completely cut things off. Getting back together with an ex usually is not a good idea, but refusing to give somebody another chance just because you want to think you’re a tough hard ass is not necessarily a good idea either.

Dirk Diggler
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So what is a good idea? Not recycling. There is a reason it didn’t work the first time.

mike says
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I agree, Irina. Hindsight is always 20/20 and sometimes you don’t realize that the good vastly outweighed the bad until it’s over. That being said, hindsight is also often filtered through rose-tinted lenses where the past is romanticized to the point that the negative elements end up forgotten.

so basically my comment is pointless.

relationships are complicated and nothing ever really ends.

Lou P.
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A girl going back to an ex also doesn’t add another point to her tally of guys that she’s slept with.

Genevieve
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I agree with the cervix smashing (to a point) and the hair pulling but Jesus Christ if someone slaps my ass it’s over. I hate that shit. It’s up there with licking my face like a goddamn lolly pop. Noting kills libido faster than ass smacking or face licking.

I know all too well about getting back with exs after breakups. It’s wildly unhealthy and I’d never do it again. Once was enough.

Jay Gatsby
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“…but refusing to give somebody another chance just because you want to think you’re a tough hard ass is not necessarily a good idea either.”

I doubt very many guys or girls would refuse to take someone back just to be a hard ass. There is almost always a very serious reason for breaking up with someone with whom you’ve been in a serious, long-term relationship (e.g., cheating). Actions speak far louder than words, and once someone has done something so serious that it merits breaking things off, it’s possible they’ll do it again. Thus, the old expression rings true in relationships as it does in life: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.”

On the other hand, if there wasn’t something serious underlying a decision to break up (e.g., things are stale, want someone new, etc…) then that’s a decision the person breaking things off has to live with in the future. Breaking things off is a serious decision, and one that shouldn’t be undertaken lightly.

Land-Man
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Alright. You can brag about how hot your sex life is as long as I witness it and can vouch for the hotness or weakness.

What is cervix smashing BTW?

eugenius
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Genevieve…….you are such a prude….you dont like red hand marks on your ass? You must not be really into it…..

Antelope4
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Gatsby has a point…fear of the unknown is not only the main reason people fall back on an ex, it is the main reason people stick it out in shitty relationships. “What if nobody else likes me?” is a thought process that leads many people in America to live unhappy lives.

DF
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The impetus for the vast majority of cases I’ve seen where a girl gets back with an ex is convenience and/or fear of being alone. Better the devil you know, than the angel you don’t.

However, I think women know full well at the break up if they intend to get back with the ex. They create avenues such as, “let’s be friends” or “let’s stay in touch” in the hopes that they have an opportunity to get back just in case nothing worthwhile materializes.

Jay Gatsby
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“What if nobody else likes me?” is a thought process that leads many people in America to live unhappy lives. — Antelope4

Good point, although that thought process is less likely than some of the following rationalizations:

1. She doesn’t want to admit she’s a failure in the dating scene (i.e., she couldn’t land the fantasy man she thinks she deserves after breaking up with WHATSHISNAME, and she wouldn’t dare settle for less).

2. She misses sex on a regular basis, and if WHATSHISNAME was good for something, at least he was better in bed than the losers she slept with after breaking up with him.

3. She can always dump WHATSHISNAME again for the same reason she did before, or for some different reason, if Mr. Right comes along.

4. She knows WHATSHISNAME will take her back. In fact, she may end up having the upper hand in the relationship and can mold him into something resembling her Mr. Right.

Supplemental reasons:

(a) Her biological clock is ticking so loud that she can’t ignore it for much longer while she searches for Mr. Right. This goes hand-in-hand with pressure she’s getting from her mother to get married and start popping out grandkids.

(b) Her girlfriends are all getting engaged or married, so she doesn’t want to be left behind as they move on to the next phase in their lives.

Mandy
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mike says and Jay Gatsby are right on the money with their comments.

Oh, and I think Roosh’s ideas on dominance-submission mean that, when a girl goes back to her ex after he puts on the brakes, it might be because she can’t handle the dating scene OR because Roosh’s ass slapping was too much for her and the girl’s ex is too beta to do stuff like that in bed. Did I interpret that correctly?

Antelope4
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Gatsby,

I can agree with most of that. But you raise a particularly poignant observation with what I like to call the “entitlement” or “princess” syndrome. I think Roosh has discussed this before, but there is an ever growing number of women who think they are entitled to the best looking, most successful, coolest man in the world when in fact they are just ordinary…and in many cases, in reality ‘ordinary’ is pushing it.

This is largely due to parenting where children are taught that they are better than everyone else and deserve only the best. This syndrome manifests itself in returning to the ex because once these people are out on the market they realize that their view of their own self worth is out of line with reality.

A few pump and dumps later and she is thinking, “maybe he was too good for me and not the other way around.”

Jay Gatsby
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“This syndrome manifests itself in returning to the ex because once these people are out on the market they realize that their view of their own self worth is out of line with reality. A few pump and dumps later and she is thinking, “maybe he was too good for me and not the other way around.” — Antelope4

Oh if were only that simple. While you’re right about the “princess syndrome”, a Boomerang Woman’s sense of entitlement never really disappears. In fact, she’s more likely to think that her aborted attempts at a new relationship with different men were the result of being “too good” for them, they didn’t “deserve” her, and there was something “clearly wrong” with each and every one of them (e.g., mommy issues, hates women, afraid of commitment, irresponsible, immature, arrogant, egotistical, selfish, etc…) These rationales are often reinforced by her girlfriends, none of whom want to confront a similar ugly reality about their own dating lives.

Likewise, a Boomerang Woman’s return to her ex-boyfriend is often accompanied by the statement she is “giving him another chance” or “he’s a changed man”, again as if the failure of her previous relationship with him was entirely his fault and NOT in any way her fault. The ex-boyfriend who takes a Boomerang Woman back under such circumstances is a fool, because she clearly doesn’t respect him as a man.

Jiffy
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The best thing about sleeping with exes are the “please take me back baby” pancakes the next morning.

I don’t know why anyone would date an ex again if you can have that instead.

nabeshin
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How to create a Roosh V thread, in 6 easy steps:

1) Write about something negative that applies to a significant chunk of the female population.
2) Anger women who (think they) aren’t in that chunk.
3) Watch said women point out vociferously that they are not, in point of fact, chunky.
4) Wonder what the hell that proves.
5) ???
6) Profit.

Anonymous
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well im saying you guys are all making it sound like its the girls fault. when me and my ex met back in 06 it was that whole he swept me off my feet type of thing….dad didnt accept him mom loved him but we only got to see each other once because it was too hard for us to be with each other at the time i put up with all his bullshit and we only tried to make it work but it didn’t at that time i knew he really didn’t want to be with me and of course it hurt and he lived too far also. we really did try to make it work so i finally got tired of the whole bullshit drama as much as him and i finally decided that i couldn’t be with him and i waited for him to break up with me which he did. he made such a big deal out of it too which was funny because i really wasn’t phased over it he tried so hard to make me jealous and he tried to convince himslef that he was over me and i knew he wasn’t it. so i told him go ur way ill go my way and we did. he thought i didn’t know that he was trying to leave me for some skank and the funny thing was she lives where im at so that’s when i really knew he didn’t want to be with me (distance of him living too far) so i said fuck it and had my lil flings i knew i could get other guys i had my fun but none of those relationships went right

to tell you the truth i prayed to have him back….. i didn’t leave him he left me and of course when we were breaking up i was starting to talk to some other guy only because we weren’t working out so what woukld you consider that…..i never did have intentions to hurt him but i think i did in someway he hurt me more because i really did love him and he couldn’t see that. so after a year he’s been dating that chick he left me for and they ended up having a kid togther that made me really upset because im like wow i will never see him again but his now ex girlfriend lol cheated on him when she was pregnant and i remember me telling him when we broke up that he wouldn’t ever find another find another girl like me and that karma is going to nip him real hard in the ass well it was true but he kind of told me that i would never find a guy better than him something like that so yea

one day i messaged him and next thing you know he’s talking to me gives me his new number and we went from there now we are slowly working things out i got to see his daughter so we are doing good there have been some issues with the ex and stuff but we get through it we actually get to see each other now lol and its been good from there i mean i work and go to school and he works so we try and make the effort to see each other things are better now than before and he told me that he knew he fucked up but i still got my guard up and i love him with all my heart but i still gotta keep my guard up. so i don’t think its all that bad to get back with an ex u just have to be cautious and think about it really i mean i did a lot of thinking and i just wanted to be back with him that’s all i wanted and i got him back or won him back that’s what i prayed for so i thank god for that…things will only get better byt for now we are taking it really slow

Nina
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I never read that post! humm…
First of all, what’s wrong with delicious dirty sex? Hair pulling, slap my ass, oh come on?! If doesn’t go any further than my room, any game it’s valid since than both are having fun.
And then, get back to ex is just boring.
I think that just low self confidence. Take the risk to find someone that is good enought for you it’s a lot of work, you not find any really atractive guy soon. Women aren’t so confident about themselves, that’s so much easier just go back to someone that it’s always there, much more safe, but nothing exciting, definally.
Plus, if didn’t work before why would work later?
My vote is always try a new shot.

nadia
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Trecia
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mary
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Hunter
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Camille Valdez
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Dirk Diggler
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I never recycle. There’s a reason it didn’t work the first time.