I’m Trying To Get Laid Clothes

You see a man with a striped shirt, dark pants, and leather shoes from Aldo. He’s not wearing that to feel comfortable, he’s wearing that to get laid. I used to wear this uniform but with diagonal striped shirts because they were in style back in the day. Some of you are too young to remember.

After getting some with i’m trying to get laid clothes, I didn’t like how the next morning’s subway ride home advertises my sexual business. It’s like I’m holding a big sign:

“HEY LOOK AT ME! I JUST GOT LAID LAST NIGHT!!! MY BREATH SMELLS REALLY BAD BECAUSE I DIDN’T TAKE A TOOTHBRUSH WITH ME WHEN I WENT OUT TO THE CLUB BECAUSE I DIDN’T THINK I WAS GOING TO GET LAID! BUT I DID GET LAID THOUGH!!!!”

The best thing about being a t-shirt guy and jeans guy is that your uniform is discrete and universal. From the club to brunch with the family, I can easily blend into any environment except a funeral. I can have conversations with strangers on the ride home after a night of sex and not a single soul suspects I just let a girl play with my anus balls.

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terps
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terps
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wow that was fast

Roissy
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Roissy
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it’s even better the walking the streets back home the next day when you’ve got bedhead and white stains in your goatee from her juices.

Joe T.
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Good subject, Roosh. Can some of the girls give their take on clothes that are guaranteed NOT to get a guy laid? Beyond the obvious, of course, like flood pants.

Jewcano
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I really could’ve done without yet another anecdote about your anus balls.

I never thought to bring a toothbrush, and I hope to the dear Lord it’s for brushing teeth and not involved in the aforementioned apparatus.

kayla
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kayla
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I am a sucker for jeans, a tshirt fitted just right and some sneaks.. Essentially, a guy that is comfortable in what he is wearing — that’s hot.

Nothing worse than seeing a guy dressed to impress… a potential employer.

Jay Gatsby
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Jewcano — try carrying the Oral-B “Brush Ups” — it’s a little sleeve that fits over your index finger that’s textured enough to brush the plaque off your teeth and give you decent breath.

Kayla — jeans and a t-shirt are fine, except when they’re worn by someone who doesn’t go to the gym. Nobody wants to see a set of scarecrow arms on a guy.