Innocent Eyes

The first time I stayed in a party hostel, while in Spain, I was amazed at the assembly of international youth. They were inquisitive and laid back, making it effortless to start a conversation and have a friend for the day. Trying to hook up with the Belgian or German hostel girls added another dimension to the fun.

I stayed in similar hostels when I went to South America over a year later, but it just wasn’t the same. The hostel kids began to seem too alike, too stale. The girls weren’t prettier than the locals. I saw them as hippies with questionable hygiene. I was never able to duplicate the fun in Spain with any other hostel I’ve stayed in.

The first time I tried to crack the code of a country’s women was in Argentina. I joined forces with many men to accomplish the task, laboring day and night. After a month of frustration, I had sex with a girl—only one. Yet it was an incredible feeling of achievement and sexual conquest that I’ve never felt again with the same intensity.

The first time I went East, to Poland, was after four months in Scandinavia of interacting with women who weren’t all that different from American girls. The sexual feast I was presented with surpassed everything else I had experienced in my life. Even now I don’t believe how motivated and full of desire I was for the several months I pursued these women, because when I went back to Poland over a year later, the energy was gone. The desire was diminished. There was no way that experience would be duplicated.

Once every couple of months, a song is released that captures my interest. I listen to it repeatedly for days, enjoying the emotional pleasure it gives me until that pleasure eventually stops. The song becomes background noise that I barely notice. I take a break from it, and then play it again, but it still doesn’t give me the same high as when I first discovered it.

Experiences can be mechanically duplicated, but the pleasure gained from them can not. The first time I slept with a girl using the Russian language only, I felt on top of the world. The last time I did so, it was just another hard-earned notch. The first book I released gave me a rush of accomplishment. With the last book I didn’t even give myself a pat on the back. How much I pity the man who banged 50 girls in Thailand, for he can never again feel a high with women. How much I pity the man who sold a business for a couple million dollars, for he will never again feel reward from his labor.

I long for the innocence that is forever lost upon success, because the more success I’ve had in life, the less I feel, the less dreams and hopes I have left. Innocence gives hope. It gives the anticipation of a great feeling, a valuable reward. But once a specific feeling is achieved just once, it is gone. Only shades of it will be felt in the future. The numbness increases every year, the apathy sets it, and all that’s left are the memories of experiences that gave you a feeling you can never again feel in the same brightness.

I’ve met men who haven’t experienced 20% of what i have, but I see the fire in their eyes, and I’m jealous, because they have a long journey in front of them, while mine is considerably shorter. Too much innocence was lost, with no worthy goal before me that will match what I’ve already done. And it’s for this reason that if you offered me a pill for everlasting life, I’d immediately refuse. We’re all given enough time—maybe too much time—to take the best of what life has to offer.

Yesterday I walked through the city, full of malaise, until something caught my ear. It’s a new song. The melody is smooth and it pleases my brain. I get the name of the song and eagerly await playing it in my home at full volume. It’s something to give me feeling for a period of time, a very special period of time.

Read Next: 7 Things I Would Tell My Teenage Self

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Indian_hotguy_Bholu
Indian_hotguy_Bholu
7 years ago

Indian society is full of filth and decadence , come to india , you will most ugliest women feeling themselves to be most beautiful ones …

India and hindu culture is filth of this world

Sim
Sim
7 years ago

This song by Delta Goodrem? A relatively old song.

thecaptainpower
7 years ago

Any interest in running? As gay as it sounds, completing a race in good time gives me similar feeling to sex/drinking/vacations….pick a race 3 mnths from today and set a goal time.

Inside UoM
7 years ago

It’s true. You can’t duplicate things to be the same the second time around. Its like the law of diminishing marginal returns. You attain the goods but feel less accomplishment.

It sucks but thats how humans are. Chasing highs are part of the fun anyway, the journey ends up meaning more than the end point.

Marco Mobley
Marco Mobley
7 years ago

Never leave eastern Europe.

n
n
7 years ago

I don’t think success is what causes you to lose your “innocence”.. Just repeated exposure to the same thing.

If anything, success makes it easier to maintain your interest in future pursuits. If you had failed at everything you had tried to date instead of succeeded, you would only be willing to put in a tiny fraction of the effort you put in now before you lost interest.

Kate
Kate
7 years ago

“Nothing is at last sacred but the integrity of your own mind.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

May I offer a bit of friendly advice? Those with limits seek to cast them off, but those without them, seek them. Consider listening to that song only once a day. As if you were a kid who could only hear it on the radio whenever you were listening and the dj chanced to play it. There is also a very powerful source of secondhand innocence: its through children.

http://eradica.wordpress.com/2012/11/16/keeping-the-virginia-real/

JB
JB
7 years ago

As you’re an “achiever” personality, the major peril is, as you already know, achieving success in areas society values and forsaking your heart’s desire.

Following your heart’s desire would seem like the scariest thing of all, because there’s no objective validation of your worth in it. Things that are scary for a lot of men aren’t scary for you – but THIS is.

Joe Dick
Joe Dick
7 years ago

hey Roosh, I see it the other way: I’d be very glad to be where you are. I know your life is not perfect but trust me, mine is not nearly one FIFTEENTH as good. And the guy who lives in a very poor country, would be very glad to be where I am. And the guy who can’t get up from a fucking wheelchair, would be glad to be where he is.

In a way I understand how you feel about it all, because even when you get sex, women really have nothing to offer, except a passing distraction.

And yes, I know what you mean about ‘innocence lost’. Speaking of music, I was thinking today about how powerful it is. You listen to a song you haven’t heard for 10 years, and all of a sudden it feels like within it are encased memories, literally a part of your life. Almost as if you feel your older self is an old friend lost along the way. Not saying I get all weepy about it, but it’s a very powerful emotion

Arya Blue
Arya Blue
7 years ago

I really enjoyed this post. When I was 20 I went to Europe for a month with a guy I was dating and some of his friends. The second day I left a note saying I was going to spend the month on my own and went to a hostel(Amsterdam). One of the best decisions of my life. I had never felt freedom like that before. But you cant really escalate from that feeling or even duplicate it, so I set myself to further challenges, until I was bored. I think it’s easier for a woman that understands game to move beyond this stage. Women are wired to find the best possible mate for life, a man you can give yourself over to completely. Someone to control the hamster, if that’s possible. Whether realizing it or not women always have an end goal. Most men never stop searching for that next best song.

Hilarious P
Hilarious P
7 years ago

man, this burn-out shit seems to be quite common among puas 10+ years in the game. roosh, have you tried getting threesomes? maybe you should try, maybe it can be a next level of pleasure for you and therefore give you motivation

then you can write about it and release “bang 2” hahaha

GP
GP
7 years ago

I think that truly great songs stand the test of time. You can go back to them and they often sound better.
I wonder if it is the same thing with women. I wonder if a quality women could stand the test of time.

MBE
MBE
7 years ago

Maybe you are successful, but you are not super successful like Bill Gates, Warren Buffet, Tiger Woods, David Letterman or Tom Cruise. If you have have a bachelor degree, get a Ph.D. If you have a million dollars, aim for a billion.
Stretch yourself!

gojira
gojira
7 years ago

you should learn an instrument, come to Brazil and i shall teach you

BigOldLongHugeGreatMassiveGrandeMuchoSuperSkyhighDickBillyBob
BigOldLongHugeGreatMassiveGrandeMuchoSuperSkyhighDickBillyBob
7 years ago

innocence is a form of ignorance. yes, they both have their limitations. but those who don’t concur or see what they want, live in quiet desperation. I’d rather be all done in with lack of ignorance than otherwise. so many stupid cunts in Ukraine are soooo fucking conservative not willing to have sex until marriage. they have innocent eyes that will keep them in a shit hole and shitty life (BUT they believe otherwise!!!) Not such a good thing!

asdf
asdf
7 years ago

This is why I got married and had kids. Now I can experience all the new stuff through their eyes and enjoy their wonder. It’s really quite sweet.

Revo Luzione
Revo Luzione
7 years ago

Roosh has read some Taoist philosophy. The Taoists, and Zen too, believes that innocence can be cultivated intentionally.

Zen Buddhists call it “beginner’s mind.”

Jadedness, and cynicism is a choice too, though it takes a lot of mental energy to choose something else.

Thus meditation is helpful, because it frees up mental energy so that one can choose innocence, beginner’s mind, mental and emotional freedom.

'Reality' Doug
7 years ago

Seriously, Roosh. Stop being a stunted philosopher. You are plenty innocent in the innumerable venues of life where you have not been and so not been successful. Reframe already. I can’t tell if you are really stuck or just feeding the readers.

Bring forth the mountain that is Higher than I
Bring forth the mountain that is Higher than I
7 years ago

I m glad to see that Roosh seriously considered posting “useful” stuff.
On one hand it is amusing to see that he considers the “energy level” to be the problem, and “adjusting to the appropriate energy level” to be the solution rather than the level of the female’s intoxication and some other things which I will not disclose at the moment .. His post “What’s the Rush” is nothing other than the projection of an Ego Defence ( HE FAILED to make the best of the aggresive way to learning, so it must be the method at fault. Naturally, all those who practice it, are phonies )
ON THE OTHER HAND, I DO NOT CARE ABOUT ALL THAT …
I am only interested in solving my problems, and in the process, I feel that others here can benefit from it as well. Roosh as well.

It is my opinion, that pretty much anything that will be posted FROM NOW ON by Roosh, however interesting, will be irrelevant. And that is A SHAME, because unfortunately he is the most interesting read I can find.
THIS IS WHY I AM LOOKING FOR BETTER Advice. Because I can’t find it on my own. I ASK you to help me find better advice on my problem. Here goes the analysis of what I believe to be “The Disease”.

It is my opinion that the real disease we ( I and others at my level ) have to fight is NONE of the below, however important they may be :
non responding females, calibration of Game, a trivial job, laws against males, you name it
In my opinion, the name of the disease is called “not being a part of something that draws males AND females to it. Not being part of something SOCIAL”. Roosh’s post “FREEDOM” posted on July 19th illustrates this point lucidly. He THINKS that he is “a free man traveling and experiencing”, when in reality he is just a lonely misplaced man.
If only we could relive high school with our new found knowledge. Back in school, we would de facto be part of something. But we can’t.
Perhaps I wrote too much. Forgive me. I just want to find a way to save myself from my “Freedom”. Perhaps, YOU, sitting alone and congregating with people that lead you nowhere, can relate to that…

nguyenimproved
7 years ago

say dzenkuije to poland and come to vietnam.

hughesshots
hughesshots
7 years ago

Take an ecstasy pill to refresh yourself emotionally. This game or any game can be emotionally exhausting, and you need to “system restore” yourself to gain your emotional energy back and take away the feeling of being burned out.

captain america
captain america
7 years ago

damn, roosh. back when i used to go to church they always told me there is no lasting happiness in sin. your last couple posts are making me think maybe there’s something to that.

Directm
Directm
7 years ago

At some level you are no longer on the quest for more stuff but a quest for truth. I suggest you watch the great film by Fellini, La Dolce Vita. Pay attention to the last act.

Artful Dodger
Artful Dodger
7 years ago

“Life is on the wire, the rest is just waiting.”

zarathustra
zarathustra
7 years ago

Another gross over simplification of psychology. There’s an inherent pleasure in learning. You should learn something because you love it not because you want to reach an arbitrary benchmark. You should learn a new language because you love the culture or the people that speak it, not because it will get you exotic notches more easily. Setting superficial goals will naturally result in fleeting payoffs assuming such flimsy motivations will even suffice for achieving success in the first place.