While most Americans were traveling to the beach this weekend thanks to Memorial Day, a holiday meant to commemorate the loss of predominately male soldiers who fought in our grandest wars, the Washington Post takes a messy liquid shit over its remaining male readership in publishing a piece of feminist propaganda by Naomi Wolf. Her thesis is that older women are better than younger women because they are more confident, more stylish, and have better resumes, and that older men who date those younger women are losers who are missing out on true happiness. Take a look at her opening anecdote:
Recently, I was at a party, and a man who, like myself, was in his late 40s, arrived with a woman 20 years younger. It took only a few moments of conversation before the rest of the group realized that the two had very little in common. And yet I did not feel the frisson of envy among the men present, nor did I see a bristle of jealousy from any of the stylish, accomplished women in their 40s. In fact, the mood of both genders was tender, almost pitying. The man may have imagined that he was showing off the youth of his date the way he might show off a new Maserati; but parading her around like an acquisition seemed only to make his friends feel sorry for him.
The party, which I imagine to have been stacked with menopausal women and their beta male hanger-ons looking to be thrown a sexual bone, had only one person worth the attention of the entire group: a man who spurned them all by deciding to fulfill his genetic destiny with a woman who could bear his child, not an “accomplished” woman in her 40s who is sterile and incapable of maternal duty.
Wolf’s jealousy can be spotted a mile away by even Stevie Wonder. There is no reason any woman would give a damn about why some man is dating some girl unless she secretly wanted to exchange places with the selected girl, who in this case was written off solely because of her young age.
This opening salvo sets the tone for an article which argues that non-fertile women, whose bodies have the habit of degrading into the shape of a soda can, are actually the best long-term mates for men. Believe it or not, this is what got published in the fifth most read newspaper in the country.
I look around at the magnetic and dynamic women my own age, I look at my own life, and instead that script seems more like a convenient fiction—designed, as so many aspects of “the beauty myth” are, to make women feel less powerful; in this case, just when their power, magnetism and sexuality are at their height.
Wolf knows what you want in a woman better than you know yourself. Forget about all that sexy, feminine crap I’ve been writing about. At the end of a long day at the job, where you’re working long hours for low pay in a strained economy, what you ache to come home to is a… magnetic woman. Magnetism will put a hot meal on the dining room table, it will take care of your kids, and it will give you orgasms in bed. With the addition of being “dynamic,” construction of our dream woman is now complete. I don’t want a woman with concrete sexual skills and homemaking abilities—I want one who can be described with corporate buzzwords that make me feel like I just came out of a bad job interview.
Since [writing The Beauty Myth], many of the issues I warned about have, indeed, gotten worse. The body size of fashion models and starlets has dropped still further; fashion ads showcase women who look as if they should be hospitalized. The technologies of cosmetic surgery have become so commonplace that there are communities in which women with unreconstructed faces are seen as bucking the norm. Breast surgery is almost universal in pornography, and pornography is almost universal in the sexual coming-of-age of both young women and young men; those images now have greater impact than they did when I wrote the book.
Wolf implies that the average American woman is so stupid and suggestible that she’s absolutely powerless to the evil forces of fashion magazines and pornography. She’s saying that a woman will follow just about whatever you put in front of her while having no ability to think on her own, that watching anal gangbangs on RedTube and PornHub is corrupting her soul and turning her into a mindless zombie consumer. In so many words she’s saying that today’s woman doesn’t have the strength to fulfill her womanly duties.
I completely agree with Wolf that women are not fulfilling their duties. To turn the tide, we must protect women from their environment by placing them in isolation cages away from all forms of marketing or entertainment. While they remain locked in those cages we must teach them real skills that further a household, such as dressing nice, cooking, cleaning, staying fit and trim, and child rearing. We must pass laws that forbid women the exposure to anything that doesn’t help strengthen the family unit. The first thing to be forbidden will be feminist propaganda written by childless women who are in all likelihood closeted lesbians.
Let me demonstrate how hypocritical this old broad is. Her book The Beauty Myth was published by HarperCollins, a company that puts out a never-ending supply of cheesy dieting and self-help books. It’s owned by News Corporation, whose 20th Century Fox studio reinforces more gender stereotypes in a single summer movie season that I will in my entire life. They also publish Vogue Magazine, which last time I checked is a fashion magazine that Wolf suggests is steadfastly destroying women.
A more recent book of hers called The Treehouse is published by Simon & Schuster, who just unleashed Eva Scrivo On Beauty onto the world, a book “packed with information on hair, skin care and makeup techniques.” It’s owned by CBS, broadcaster of the Superbowl, which has accepted millions of dollars from GoDaddy whose commercials feature attractive women showing off gigantic breasts. Wolf specifically singles out such breast enhancement culture as a horrible destructor of a woman’s self-esteem yet she is all too quick to show her ample cleavage at public events. It’s easy for her to criticize women trying to get a respectable chest when she already has massive udders.
I honestly don’t care about those GoDaddy commercials, Vogue Magazine, or any dieting book that fleeces women with dubious health advice, but if you’re going to make it your life mission to criticize cultural forces which you believe are destroying women, and at the same time cash royalty checks from those companies while they ejaculate that crap onto the the faces of American women, what does make you? It makes you a hypocrite and a phony.
She criticizes “beauty products” made by companies that supply profits for the companies that pay her. That would be like me publishing a men’s rights book with the same company that also puts out a gender studies textbook that says the only way to eliminate rape is to eliminate men. I should be rightly denounced for such hypocrisy, yet this woman can stay on her ivory tower and put out silly ideas in mainstream publications without being called out on it.
Wolf doesn’t care about women, she just cares about her bank account, her accomplishments, and her speaking engagements that take her around the country. For any woman to hitch her wagon to Wolf would be like a real conservative stroking the balls of Bill O’Reilly. One has to wonder if they even believe half the things they say.
When I am at a social occasion, the showstoppers are no longer the young beauties in their 20s. Rather, those who draw all the light in the room are the women of great accomplishment and personal charisma—and these are usually women in midlife. (Indeed, at events I have attended recently, cadres of conventionally beautiful young women seem now to be treated almost like wallpaper or like the catering staff.)
Can you imagine going to a party where all the men ignore young beautiful women who can still conceive children while going for old woman rejects whose breasts hang down to their waists without the aid of a bra? Can someone at the Washington Post fact-check this anecdote? Actually there is no need. The reason those “young beauties” aren’t getting attention is because they’re already with a man. Old hags have no choice but to desperately wrangle away the spotlight by being “witty” or “engaging” since they’re so desperate to meet someone—anyone—who will stick around for more than a casual encounter. A young woman does not have to try and does not need a multi-page resume listed with her accomplishments. As long as she’s attractive, she just has to be.
The change in social norms around the issue of women’s aging is immense. There is now an influential and growing demographic of educated, well-off women whose status, sense of self-esteem and sexual cachet rise rather than fall as they head toward midlife. I do not see younger women looking at accomplished women in their 40s with pity or derision: I see them looking ahead with admiration and even envy.
I sure don’t see social norms changing, but then again I don’t go to New Yorker-style social functions where feminist hacks lick each other’s pussies. Wolf offers absolutely no evidence to this “immense” change besides anonymous quotes. She provides no numbers to support the “growing” demographic of menopausal women who can get any man they want. Besides younger studs in their early 20s getting seduced by pathetic cougars who pay their bills, I surely don’t see a new paradigm forming that changes what men have done for hundreds of thousands of years. The day I see men of this country tacking on 20 years to the ideal age of women they currently prefer is the day we have evolved into a new species.
And can someone please tell me what “sexual cachet” is? I’m guessing it’s doublespeak for sexual desperation. We’ve arrived at the juncture where modern feminism has been reduced to single women armed with thesauruses. The movement no longer provides any sort of data, evidence, or even the flimsiest of surveys for their assertions. They’re doing nothing more these days but preaching to the choir of undesirable, lost women.
Many older women no longer see younger women as rivals in the same way. “I have empathy for them,” said one 54-year-old psychologist. “I want to mentor younger women, not compete with them,” remarked another friend, a 48-year-old photographer.
Substitute empathy with jealousy and mentor with sabotage and we have the most accurate quote in the article.
Certainly some men my age still date or marry younger, as our friend at the party sought to do; but in my own circles, at least, it is considered more macho for a man to have an accomplished woman his own age on his arm.
This is the first time I’ve seen a feminist use a reverse-shaming technique where she compliments a behavior that only beta males have been performing. If going for a 45-year-old woman is macho then I will never be macho. When I’m 60 years old, alone, decrepit, and staring at a warty dick whose glory days have long since passed, I will be anti-macho by going to Colombia or Thailand to sleep with 18-year-old prostitutes for less than the price of taking a woman like Wolf to dinner with nothing to gain from it except hearing her deluded opinions and mighty accomplishments. Dating a bloated hag like Wolf would put even the most strapping of men on the fast track to viagra dependency.
When I asked my single male peers why they were dating or having relationships with women their own ages rather than younger women, I heard variants of this: “Today, someone isn’t less cool as she gets older. She is just as cool or cooler. And, if a woman is taking care of herself, there isn’t really a difference sexually between a younger and an older woman – except that the older woman is more comfortable with herself and more sure of herself.”
Those men are single for a reason: they are unsuccessful in dating younger, more desirable women. They have no choice but to date their peers. I know of no society in the world where dating 40 and above is macho, preferred, or pleasurable. Such a society only exists in Wolf’s magnetic brain.
By insinutating that older women are so amazing, she strongly presupposes that younger women are stupid and undesirable. Wolf doesn’t really care about feminism or the female gender, she only cares about older women her own age, specifically herself. Her article is nothing more than a diary entry of a bitter spinster who can’t get a man and is jealous of those women who are outperforming her on the dating market. Wolf secretly hates the beautiful 23-year-old former cheerleader who has gotten the commitment from a handsome jock who wants to take care of her for life, since the ship has long since sailed for her to get anything but a sniveling dweeb who couldn’t fuck a 20-something girl to save his life.
So, at the risk of sounding socially incorrect, I am going to deviate from that script, and I invite all women of a certain age to join me. A great many of us don’t feel particularly wistful or rueful about our earlier physical selves. A great many of us really like where we are.
I like where I am.
In the Five Stages of Grief, denial is the first stage. This is where she’s at. Let me sum up the stages for the life of Naomi Wolf:
Denial: “Being old and ugly is beautiful. I can land any man that I desire because I’m a best-selling author, something that men specifically select for.”
Anger: “I keep getting passed on for younger, more beautiful women. Guys only fuck me once or twice and then dump me via text message. Even my Craigslist hookups are not calling me back. This isn’t fair!”
Bargaining: “Come on just give me two more years. I should be able to trick a decent man into marrying me. I’ll go to the beauty salon, I’ll dye my hair weekly. I’ll even cook real meals without using a microwave. I don’t want to die alone!”
Depression: “Wow I don’t believe this has happened to me. I wasted my entire life teaching women to be strong and independent and all that has gotten me is a life of loneliness and isolation. Maybe I should have been nice to all those decent guys who gave me attention instead of dismissing them outright because they didn’t agree with all my crazy beliefs.”
Acceptance: “Time to buy some cats.”
Here is some more evidence she’s in the denial stage:
Sure, I am startled when I forget to put a color rinse in my hair, and I look into the bathroom mirror and see a sheen of gray. But I look at it with a kind of gentle curiosity: So that is what that will be like!
I am overwhelmed with gratitude for a body that can move and hike and swim, seduce and be seduced, be exhilarated and overjoyed, and all of this in the blessing of being free of serious illness.
She found other ladies who are in denial as well:
A 59-year-old teacher said: “I’d rather look great for who I am than try to look 19. I feel happier in my skin than I did when I was younger.”
The most pathetic part of her article is when she tries to rationalizes her declining beauty:
There are many other delightful surprises about being at this stage on the journey. I don’t miss the brutal sexual harassment that young women receive from men—and I love the far gentler flirtation or civil compliments from cab drivers and park chess players my own age or older. On the street, young women are told: Give me some. Older women hear: I love your eyes. That is not a bad trade.
Did you read that? A benefit to aging is that she gets less sexual attention from the opposite sex, and when she does it’s from the creepy guy who sits in the coffee shop all day with stacks of old newspapers (newsflash to Wolf: he tells every woman she has beautiful eyes). Her argument that becoming invisible and undesirable is a good thing is so convincing that I bet hordes of young women are speeding up the process by dyeing their hair grey and tripling their tanning sessions to induce premature wrinkle formation.
Unfortunately for us, her opinions are not invisible as long as publications like the Washington Post give her a voice to spew nonsense onto the masses that I’m hoping fails to convince anyone but older woman who insist on denying the reality of evolution, sexual selection, and human nature. Men do not prefer older women. Men do not care about a woman’s magnetism. Men do not want an overly-opinionated cow who excels only in talking bullshit instead of maintaining a home. Wolf can continue to write articles and books for corporations that push the very culture she claims to be against, but nothing will change the immutable laws of human nature.
Until women realize that their window of opportunity is short for landing a quality man, they will continue wasting their lives thanks to enablers like Wolf, who would rather die in a house that smells like cat urine than see a woman succeed with men when she has so horribly failed.