From a reader…
Don’t forget one huge important point — fucking misery loves company. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen some stupid washed-up broad do everything in her power to destroy her girlfriends’ otherwise happy relationships with their boyfriends. I’ve seen this pattern over and over, particularly in this DC shit-hole of a city: dumb bird in her mid/late 30’s is queen bee/mentor to girls in their 20’s; one girl in her 20’s has minor tiff with boyfriend, who she otherwise loves, but talks to queen bee about it all for help; queen bee offers staggeringly intelligent feedback, usually something along the lines of “Fuck him, you don’t need him, dump his ass, stick with me sister”; girl in 20’s takes this brilliant advice and dumps boyfriend impulsively; now queen bee and girl in 20’s are happy to troll U Street and talk about their shoes, their periods, Grey’s Anatomy, and how much they hate men and don’t need them.
This really is a big problem — I am convinced that uppity professional women, once they realize that their facile head-game ways have doomed them to a life of being used sexually, wake up one day and start destroying everything happy around them for sport.
When I’m in the initial stages of getting to know a girl now, I do everything i can to stay away from her friends and remain a mystery to her social circle. If i ever decide to have a serious relationship, you can bet that I’m going to be the Snuffleupagus of boyfriends, appearing to her friends purely through her stories about me, until i determine that i have cemented enough of a place in her life that she’ll look past queen bee’s horse-shit arm-chair psychology and pathology.
Very good observation, and excellent use of Snuffleupagus.