South America By The Numbers


…days there: 188

…countries I visited: 9

cities I spent at least one night in: 30

…days my stomach has not been right: 130+ and counting

…times I washed my only pair of pants (jeans): 4

…items the laundry places lost: 2

…times I used a laundry place: around 20

…bridges I jumped off: 1

…times I hand-washed clothing: 0

…months until I had to take a shit in a bus station restroom: 5

…months until turned into a “beer guy”: 3

…posts I wrote for this blog: 89

…words I wrote in my travel journal: 76,000

…nights spent camping: 0

…haircuts: 0

…times I got robbed: 1

…total number of hours on the bus: 253 (10.5 days)

…average length of a bus ride: 8 hours

…percent of my time in South America spent on the bus: 5.6%

…longest continuous bus ride: 24 hours

…longest continuous journey without a bed: 45 hours (4 buses)

…pairs of ear plugs I went through: 8

…different gyms I used: 5

…percentage of hostels that I’m sure had bed bugs: 15%

beaches I swam in: 3

…hospitals I’ve stepped foot in: 4

…drug or vaccine injections: 8

…times I was awaken by dorm-mates having sex: 2

girls I met that I’d consider dating long term: 1

…Irish people who broke the “Irish people drink a lot” stereotype: 0

…pairs of contact lenses I went through: 5

…times I took language instruction: 3

…new porn video clips I downloaded: 0

…books I read: 0

…times I was bodily searched outside an airport: 1

glaciers I saw: 5

…postcards I sent: 67

…times I thought I may not make it out of South America alive: 2

…South American countries I have not stepped foot in: 4

…hotel room in a small Bolivian city: $3

…large smoothie with protein in Rio de Janeiro: $3

…Red Bull in a Rio de Janeiro gas station: $4

…night at the Copacabana Palace hotel: $520

…money I spent not including airfare: ???

…cost to Quito, Ecuador by air: $475

…one-way ticket home from Rio: $1025

…price of round-trip ticket from Rio: $1025

…regrets: 0


  1. Sudamericana February 19, 2008 at 10:41 am

    I am going to ask the obvious, but I suspect many readers are wondering about it. Where are the notches/flags stats?????

  2. Lemmonex February 19, 2008 at 10:54 am

    Good lord, I am going to sound like such a mom/harpy woman here, but have you been to a doctor for your stomach? That shit ain’t right. If nothing else, such, er, distress screws with your game.

    Lemmonex’s last blog post: And Unicorns Fly Out of the Pan.

  3. Beach Bum February 19, 2008 at 11:32 am

    Still no regrets of leaving Brazil so soon… Tsc tsc tsc… you really don’t know what you’re missing…

    Beach Bum’s last blog post: The VDay.

  4. Jack Goes Forth February 19, 2008 at 12:30 pm

    We all know you don’t share that many really personal details but give us a flag count from the trip at least. We deserve it.

    What specifically were the drug/vaccine injections for?

    Jack Goes Forth’s last blog post: The State Of Jack Address.

  5. Tampa February 19, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    You didn’t get laid….

    damn damn.

  6. Brian February 19, 2008 at 12:50 pm

    I hope you bought a round trip ticket in case you want to go back in a month, especially since it wouldnt cost anything

  7. irina February 19, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    ear plugs are addictive.
    i’m glad you enjoyed yourself!

  8. Anonymous February 19, 2008 at 1:13 pm

    You’ve just described my high school experience.

  9. dmt February 19, 2008 at 6:29 pm

    First, why not bring or buy an extra pair of pants? I mean, really, whats the harm? Second, you didn’t get laid did you? That fucking sucks, but at least man-up to it.

  10. Roosh February 19, 2008 at 6:39 pm

    Those who are especially curious about where my dick has been in south america can ask me in person.

  11. Ned February 20, 2008 at 1:57 am

    my friend’s stomach wasnt right until a month or two after mexico. i suspect roosh’ll be ok

  12. Sudamericana February 20, 2008 at 11:18 am

    Nope, in fact, I cannot ask you in person 🙂

  13. Gunslingergregi February 20, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    Methinks too the boy definitely did not get laid! Can’t ask you in person due to long distance. You are the one who regards himself as the self-proclaimed “Expert” in picking up chicks. Can’t imagine why you are so insulted in not offering up that tally….why we have been subjected to various intimate details of your poo…feels like we all know you intimately already!

  14. Gunslingergregi February 20, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    Suddenly the boy is shy? Awww…give me a break!

    I don’t mean to disrespect the “Expert” here, but do you think having a shortage of clean clothes might have had something to do with it?

  15. miik February 20, 2008 at 4:21 pm

    Does “bodily searched” count as a notch?

  16. vb February 22, 2008 at 12:44 pm

    i’m pretty sure he banged.

  17. cyber star August 30, 2008 at 6:49 pm

    that was a really cool post man, I enjoyed the [email protected] out of it.

    I got Diahorea 3 times in 2 weeks in Rio, all different kinds so I can relate.


  18. ooopinionsss December 3, 2008 at 7:50 am

    How you think when the economic crisis will end? I wish to make statistics of independent opinions!