I have not been shy about highlighting the fact that seed oil, sometimes called zog oil, is industrial sludge. They should not be classified as “food” and should not be eaten by human beings. Even though seed oils are in everything, it’s not that difficult to eliminate them from your diet. I challenge you to do so.

Imagine someone you know who is self-destructive with how they live. They drive without wearing a seatbelt, use an electric saw without safety goggles, and chop onions with a paring knife. Such a person is endangering themselves in innumerable ways, but I can guarantee that they don’t eat mud, bits of glass, or rat poison. Perhaps they inject themselves with poisons such as coronavirus vaccines or heroin, but they do not drink cloudy water nor eat putrid meat. And yet not a day goes by in this person’s life that they don’t eat toxic seed oils. When I realized the truth of seed oils, I immediately began an effort to rid them from my diet through four practical steps.

Step 1: Finish all the seed oil foods in your pantry

Chances are you have several weeks’ worth of seed oil food in your home, most likely in the form of processed snacks. I don’t like throwing away food, so I extended the poisoning of my body by a couple of weeks so that I could finish all the foods I should have never bought in the first place. This mostly came in the form of Clif Bars, which I would eat after a mild callisthenic workout. Turns out that the bars had “organic soybean oil.” Good try, Clif, but you can make hemlock organic and I still wouldn’t consume it.

Step 2: Read the ingredient labels of everything you buy at the supermarket

Me in a couple of years

The first time you go to the supermarket with the intention of reading nutritional labels to identify seed oils like canola, soy, safflower, and sunflower, you will be depressed, because the bulk of your diet was filled with garbage oil. You will realize that you’ve traded convenience and mouth pleasure for poison, unnecessarily desecrating your body. So begins your education in preparing quick and basic meals using healthier fats (butter, ghee, pork lard, beef tallow, extra virgin olive oil, coconut oil) and single ingredient sources. Thankfully, there are a billion food blogs and YouTube cooking channels that make it effortless to learn. Even I have published a recipe that is the length of a novella.

Step 3: Research the ingredients of your favorite restaurants

All chain restaurants have a “Nutrition” section on their website that lists all the synthetic and unnatural ingredients they use in their “food.” For the restaurants you frequent, check out the ingredients in the meals you usually order. I’ll save you some time: they are all loaded with seed oil. If it’s a chain restaurant, they use seed oils by the rusted barrelful. (The only chain I’ve found that doesn’t use them excessively is Panera.) If you’re a foodie and go to high-end restaurants, chances are you’re safe, because they tend to use butter and extra virgin olive oil.

A few months ago I was dragged to Waffle House. When I watched the disgruntled cook ladle neon yellow soybean oil onto the grill, I knew my body would not agree with the food (it didn’t—I experienced heart palpitations that very night and had trouble sleeping).

I went to the Applebee’s website and picked a random dish, the Bourbon Street Chicken & Shrimp. Here are the actual ingredients:

Garlic Mashed Potatoes: Garlic Mashed Potatoes: Potatoes, Milk Blend (Milk, Skim Milk, Canola Oil, Cream, Datem, Water, Salt, Artificial Flavor, Vitamin A Palmitate And Vitamin D3 Added), Water, Margarine (Soybean Oil, Water, Salt, Hydrogenated Cottonseed Oil, Mono And Diglycerides, Soy Lecithin, Potassium Sorbate (Preservative), Natural And Artificial Flavor, Lactic Acid, Beta Carotene (Color), Vitamin A Palmitate), Margarine [Canola Oil, Water, Palm And Palm Kernel Oil, Salt, Whey Powder (Milk), Vegetable Monoglycerides, Soy Lecithin, Potassium Sorbate (Preservative), Artificial Flavor, Citric Acid, Vitamin A Palmitate, Vitamin D3, Beta Carotene], Cultured Buttermilk, Buttermilk Powder, Whey Solids, Natural Flavor, Monoglycerides, Roasted Garlic, Citric Acid, Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate and Titanium Dioxide (color), Parsley: Parsley, Grilled Chicken Breast: Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast With Rib Meat, Water, Seasoning (Salt, Onion Powder, Yeast Extract, Garlic Powder, Chicken Broth, Sugar, L-Glutamic Acid, Disodium Inosinate And Disodium Guanylate, Lactic Acid, Dextrose, Citric Acid, Grill Flavor (From Sunflower Oil), Artificial Flavor, No More Than 2% Silicon Dioxide Added To Prevent Caking), Modified Food Starch, Sodium Phosphates, Soybean Oil, Grilled Onions: Onion, Liquid And Hydrogenated Soybean Oil, Salt, Natural & Artificial Flavor, Soy Lecithin, TBHQ And Citric Acid (Preservatives), Artificial Color, Dimethylpolysiloxane (Anti-Foaming Agent), Salt, Dehydrated Garlic, Spices, Soybean Oil, Not More Than 2% Silicon Dioxide Added To Prevent Caking, Sauteed Shrimp: Shrimp, Water, Salt, Sodium Bicarbonate, Sodium Carbonate, Sodium Citrate, Soybean Oil, Seasoned Mushrooms: Mushrooms, Liquid And Hydrogenated Soybean Oil, Salt, Natural & Artificial Flavor, Soy Lecithin, TBHQ And Citric Acid (Preservatives), Artificial Color, Dimethylpolysiloxane (Anti-Foaming Agent), Garlic Butter Sauce: Liquid And Hydrogenated Soybean Oil, Salt, Natural & Artificial Flavor, Soy Lecithin, TBHQ And Citric Acid (Preservatives), Artificial Color, Dimethylpolysiloxane (Anti-Foaming Agent), Liquid Margarine (Soybean Oil, Water, Vegetable Mono & Diglycerides, Salt, Natural Flavor (Milk), Vitamin A Palmitate, Vitamin D3), Garlic, Anhydrous Milkfat, Spice, Contains Less Than 2% Of Each Of The Following: Salt, Natural Flavor, Natural Extractive Of Turmeric And Annatto (Color), Garlic, Water, Citric Acid (Preservative), Salt, Spice, Garlic Powder, Sunflower Oil (Flow Agent), Blackened Seasoning: Spices, Salt, Dehydrated Onion, Dehydrated Garlic, Dextrose, Celery Seed, Soybean Oil (As A Processing Aid), Cajun Seasoning: Spices, Salt, Garlic Powder, Paprika, Onion Powder, Modified Corn Starch, Caramel Color (Class Iii), Disodium Inosinate, Disodium Guanylate, Medium Chain Triglycerides, Artificial Flavors, Natural Flavors, Less Than 2% Each Sunflower Oil And Silicon Dioxide As Processing Aids

Can this dish even be considered food? I rather eat a meal of bread and salt.

The safest food to eat out is the humble deli sandwich. Yes, the bread will have some seed oil and high fructose corn syrup, and the meat will have various chemical preservatives and even seaweed (carrageenan), but it’s better than typical chain-fare. I tell you that I may never eat French fries again in my life, which are fried in rancid seed oils. The idea of eating French fries has become abhorrent to me.

Step 4: Prepare all of your meals

I eat approximately 14 meals each week. Either I or my mother prepare 13 of those without the use of seed oils, and the fourteenth meal is the Sunday fellowship lunch at church. There is not a whole lot of variety in my diet, and during long Orthodox fasts I’m sustained almost entirely on peanut butter, bread, and potatoes, but because I’m not poisoning myself, I’m not worse off than seed oil eaters who eat a “variety” of foods laced with inflammatory chemical agents. After reducing my heart palpitations through functional changes to my lifestyle, I’m in exceedingly good health outside of creaking knees and a sensitive lower back, but I would not be upset if it was God’s will for me to contract a severe affliction, because the point of life is not merely good physical health. Perhaps I get more pleasure from my seed oil strike at disobeying the will of the oligarchs who are determined to make me eat like a farm pig than any perceived health benefits, because it turns out that one day I will die no matter what I eat.

It’s effortless to become neurotic with food. After discovering that seed oil is sludge, I went too far and become slightly obsessed with every little thing I ate. I’ve since come back from that and have adopted a middle path where I only have one overall food rule: no seed oils. I find that that rule alone is sufficiently keeping my diet clean enough to stay in tip-top shape to serve my duties before God, that it doesn’t matter if I don’t eat bone broth, organic beef liver, raw milk, cod fish oil, and all the other trendy hipster foods that are supposed to prolong my life. If the only rule you have when it comes to food is no seed oils, I guarantee you will be in the top 5% of healthy eating with no additional effort, even if you eat cake every day (that you bake yourself with expeller-pressed avocado oil instead of seed oil), because a diet without seed oils will automatically exclude the most processed trash.

Now I must confess that there is one type of food I eat that contains minute amounts of seed oil: roasted mixed nuts. I imagine I’m eating one or two drops of seed oil a day because of it. I love nuts and must eat nuts. I’ve considered roasting my own nuts, but I’ll save that activity for my future wife (along with churning butter from our dairy cow and milling our own flour). To eat one food with seed oil prevents me from going over the edge into obsession, and you are welcome to judge me for that. If I’m starving and only have bottles of seed oil laying around, I will not touch them. I imagine that to be like dying of thirst while floating in a salty ocean. I wonder if dirt is more nutritious.

Since undertaking the seed oil challenge, I eat less sweets and restaurant food. While I’m not a bad cook, I often choose to whip up a quick sandwich that is definitely less pleasurable to my taste buds than an engineered Frankenstein restaurant meal laced with seed oils. By loosening my attachment to externally tasty—but internally toxic—meals, I’ve inadvertently aided my Orthodox faith and have been able to lean more on daily spiritual bread for happiness than worldly bread. It also has made prolonged fasts easier since I have less attachment to elaborate meals and feasts.

We should not be surprised that abstaining from zog oil indirectly aids our faith in God. From that we can safely conclude that the poisoning of the food supply with non-food is of Satan. I hope to abstain from more than two drops of seed oil per day for the rest of my life.

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