The Beginning Of The End

The notch was a great metric that kept me motivated in the game longer than my natural disposition. I wanted to hit a high number so that I could feel like a man. I eventually hit a count which made me feel proud, yet I kept going. There were girls I banged just so I could send a “+1” text to my friends and get validated by their positive response, but eventually that got old.

The flag was a new metric that kept me not only banging but traveling as well. Long after I stopped caring about notching my belt, flagging kept me full-time in the game for an extra three years of my life. But then I got a lot of flags and there weren’t many other countries I wanted to visit. It stopped being enough.

Doing it for the story was a new reason to stay in the game. I know my role as the monkey who must keep dancing. I pursued interactions I normally wouldn’t so that I could write something for you. But there are only so many ways to tell the same story and the validation you gave me was no longer enough to send me out the door to repeat what I’ve already done so many times before.

I noticed a change halfway through my last trip to Europe. I was getting more and more reluctant to go out at night. I had to force myself using all manner of tricks. I ignored the voice inside me that said to stop and went out anyway to rack up more notches, more flags, and more stories. I was a banging machine, totally mindless about why I was doing something that was giving me decreasing pleasure. I like making fun of American women for having the mentality of a hamster, but I was the epitome of a hamster, spinning around, working hard to fuck when it has long stopped moving me forward.

For the first time since 2003, I banged less girls than the year prior (2011 was greater than my 2012). My quantity has peaked. I simply cannot harness that amount of energy I put into getting laid with what I did in 2011, no matter how much alcohol or caffeine I pump into my body, no matter what artificial flag goal I make, no matter how much I abstain from masturbating, and no matter how I try to jack up my testosterone levels through diet or weight lifting. Today when I see a pretty girl with a great ass, I can’t help but be reminded of another girl I fucked who looks similar to her, and how I’m ready to only put in the most minimal of effort to take her to bed—effort that is simply not enough to maintain my previous results.

“No, it’s not over yet, just put in the work! Keep going! Go to the club tonight! Don’t stop!”

Nearly three months ago in Warsaw I went out alone to a Polish club. I psyched myself up to put in 10 honest approaches. I would go back to my roots and just work and bang. I didn’t want to accept that I’ve peaked.

It took everything I had to make it to eight approaches. I only liked one of the girls, and the rest I just went through the motions, as if out of habit. I kissed a random girl that gave me a half boner. I went home and stared at myself in the mirror for a long while. I saw the gray in my beard and hair. I saw the lines developing around my mouth. I saw the tired eyes of a man who has been lucky to see what he has. On that night, for the first time in eleven and a half years, getting laid was no longer the number one priority in my life.

The game is in my blood. Like any addict coming off a drug, there will be relapses, but I know change when I see it.

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OldHornDog
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OldHornDog
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So long, and thanks for all the fish smile

The Private Man
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You’re coming into a new phase in life where you’re looking for something more. This is understandable. You’re also entering an age that relationship-minded Manospherians see as the ideal age for a man to find a woman for a committed relationship. As I doubt that is on the forefront of your mind, I suspect that the idea of commitment is percolating in the background. Being around all those attractive, feminine eastern European girls is likely getting to you.

Your challenge is to find a project that yields both income and personal fulfillment. Return of Kings might very well be it. Keep us all posted.

OldHornDog
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OldHornDog
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Roosh – you have played the notch game and it has played itself out. Nothing wrong with that. But getting a bit older and more mature doesn’t mean you are done with ‘the game’. Although I haven’t collected as many notches as you (who has!?) I know exactly where you are, but I can assure you it’s not the beginning of the end – rather it’s the end of the beginning wink

In a year or two you should change your game toward TOP NOTCHES. Focus ONLY on 8+ notches, which will considerably change your approach. If your goal is to only bang nines and possibly tens you will maybe bag one every few weeks but it will be worth the experience. Think young pussy monger evolving into international jet-setting man of mystery. Just an idea – whatever you decide you’ll always be a legend to us.

CajunSensation
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Hope you find your new motivation, whatever that may be, and keep sharing.

3rd Millenium Men
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Thanks for the devastatingly honest insights Roosh. I’m at the same stage. Have done things far beyond what I (or 99% of men) could have ever dreamed with women. But now I’m at the stage where I’m ready to move on and settle down. I want to have kids. When it comes down to it, that’s the most important legacy we leave behind.

spandrell
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spandrell
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So now Roosh goes into politics. Yawn.

DAP
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DAP
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I believe Roosh has ascended to the next level of pick-up, which is called Empire Building.
It’s a level usually reserved for Kings, Celebrities, Rock Stars, Presidents, and Czars.
It’s where pussy is no longer a challenge for you anymore and the next logical step for a man to do is build a Nation.
After you “pick-up” pussy; it’s now time to “pick-up” the World.

Matt
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Matt
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I think you should do what everyone does when they get to this stage… Try to pass on your knowledge! (Not that you haven’t done that before) But you might want to do more one on one style stuff. Sort of like a Jedi master and his padawan, to use a nerd reference

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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When you quit, it will be like losing a great friend, even though I’ve never met you.

Part of my motivation will die with your “passing”. But I’ve not achieved anything near your level yet. My journey has only just begun. I must travel. I must push my comfort zones. I must persist in the face of this madness that we call The Game.

Only then will I even consider a change of course.

Thanks for the inspiration, man!

Good luck.

Teedub
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“I saw the gray in my beard and hair. I saw the lines developing around my mouth. I saw the tired eyes of a man who has been lucky to see what he has.”

That was a actually quite moving in my opinion.

CaptainCaveman
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:emo Say it ain’t so

DAP
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DAP
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Secondly, Roosh (or any other man for that matter.) should never settle down based on game boredom. The worst thing a man can do is settle down based on player boredom. That’s what happened to Usher the pop singer. It’s been over a year and he is still in/out of divorce court with that wilda-beast he married.

Burt
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Burt
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Roosh, I think you need to raw dog a feminist to give you back that righteous anger. http://www.rooshv.com/do-it-for-the-notch

DirkJohanson
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You’ve been a huge inspiration and source of wisdom for me but its time for you to move on to my game: hooker game. I fucked two new hotties on saturday afternoon, separated only by a couple of miles and a short lunch. The second,a 21yo Russian, has the body of a model, loves getting doggied, and asked me to cum on her face. My 21yo hooker/girfriend (I’m 50) turned me on to her before she went to jail. They are getting cheap down here in Tampa, total cost for both $175.

Burt
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Burt
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Maybe you should temporarily go back to being a lab worker who plays poker instead of game. Let that frustration really build up then unleash yourself onto the world again.

2mques
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2mques
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Actually, this is what you need to accept, that you’re not going to find a woman who’s good enough for you…you’re going to have to build a woman enough.

In all your “experiences”, you’ve gained a tremendous amount of wisdom. You’ve gained wisdom on sex, wisdom on relationships. You’re very aware of the mistakes women make that makes guys not want to be with them. You also understand the necessities that help make men and women have happiness with one another.

Use all that wisdom and take a girl under your wing and give her guidance. Show her the foolishness in her ways and make her better. Even if it doesn’t work, a woman who has red pill wisdom is going to be much more easier to deal with and much more beneficial to the human race than those who don’t.

Burt
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Burt
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DirkJohanson is right.

So many guys I’ve seen casually justify moving onto hookers and you know its because they no longer carry the fire.

Its either game or hookers but beware choosing hookers tend to go with a drug habit to numb the self loathing.

SJ
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SJ
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Roosh,

I went through similar process after traveling many countries and banging hundreds of hot foreign women. Now I focus on building wealth, health and hobbies like sailing, scuba, and flying to be more than just chasing notches. I am much happier now and feel free and that my life is not a waste. Keep up the great work!

I do have a question regarding eastern european beauty and women. Which countries have the hottest most feminine women? Poland, Ukraine, Russia, Belarus or Croatia? I am learning Russian and want to know what to focus on!

Cheers,
SJ

Jack
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It’s called growing up. Good for you.

Once a swordsman, always a swordsman. Quality, in the end, trumps mere quantity – once the ability to land pussy almost effortlessly has been internalized in a man’s psyche.

I came here for the great writing, I’ve stayed for the honesty and the truths.

Keep it up, Roosh, you’ve got a lot of miles, and words, and quality pussy, in your future.

My story is somewhat similar to yours, I’m just a few years older. Growing up actually isn’t hard to do when you do it right.

Wald
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Wald
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Maybe the next part of game is mastery of woman – stuff like the deep conversion that Krauser and Xsplat talk about.

Red Pill
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Red Pill
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If you are thinking of catching oneitis you’ll regret it.

thecaptainpower
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I peaked at around 29. Now at age 33 Im not tired of the banging per se, but you get tired of all the clubs…

Need to start diversifying. Keep working out, start running, form international businesses, etc.

Buy some polish real estate? Why not?

HCE
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HCE
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Well, it will be interesting to see some of your insights into relationship game.

prepman
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Re: DirkJohnson

When you get to our age, it isn’t that you don’t have game to get hot, young bang-your-brains out girls. It’s just that you’re more selective and have the financial resources to hire pros if you so desire and eliminate game. You get LAZY because you can be lazy if choose.

While I haven’t done hookers yet, it’s always a thought in the back of my mind. I’m good at the money, so I’m keenly aware of how much a good lay runs per hour compared to the crap I have to put up with for perhaps a 25% chance of a lay even with excellent game.

It’s also a sign of maturity that you’re not going to waste energy gaming so hard. Young lions may chase after any female in heat, but it’s the old leader of pride that has already won his lot of females and sits on his ass all day only exerting himself to eat, screw, and sleep — and fight off the occasional outsider challenging his dominion.

I’m just too lazy (or smart) to chase anything and everything because if my only goal is to get my dick wet, I can simply divert a few bones from scotch to pussy for a guaranteed great time. Or hell, have both at the same time!

ll
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ll
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You and heartiste should team up to write a book about keeping LTRs fresh and fun.

Socialkenny
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This sort of dilemma that Roosh spoke about, the average guy will never face this if he’s only banging mediocre #’s over the course of his adulthood. I wrote about this a while ago where I felt that I was losing my mojo. Perhaps it’s a phase which will pass, but for now, I don’t think I can ever top 2009, which was my most active year in f-closing girls. 2012 was probably my worst year since becoming a seductionist. My notch count was dismal!

Virgle Kent
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Man, I feel that everyone goes through this. For me it’s more seasonal and a product of being in DC. I couldn’t imagine being surrounded by all that fine Eastern European bodies. But in the winter I want to slow down, chill forget about the notch. In the summer I’m back at it. maybe that’s the way it should be

Alex
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Alex
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I hope this doesn’t portend an end to your presence in the manosphere any time soon. But if it does, thanks for all the quality work that you’ve done. It’s so refreshing in our times to read the work of people who are completely honest about their lives and offer insights that aren’t corporate sponsored lies. Even better when those insights inspire you to become a better guy and get what you want outta life.

Flytrap
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Flytrap
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I think you ought to try and be an advocate for the political movement you believe in based on your experience with women and your international experience. There is bound to be lots of wisdom and insight you could use to further some societal movement for positive change.

YouSoWould
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YouSoWould
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Congratulations, welcome to the other side.

Your writing is good enough to stand up on its own without it all having to be about pickup.

What next? Use your skill set to try and find a high enough quality girl to have a relationship with? As I’m sure you already know, there aren’t many out there…

jurko
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jurko
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Since a while ago your political writing is much more fiery and passionate than the game stories, which frankly became a bit repetitive (repealing the fat cockblock, some not really pleasant bloody sex, etc.)

Burt
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Burt
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“I went home and stared at myself in the mirror for a long while. I saw the gray in my beard and hair”

Notice how women over the hill don’t think twice to dye their hair and deceive men as to their depreciated value.
Take your grey hair as a badge of honour.

Andrew
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Andrew
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You’ve only “peaked” in the sense that you are probably going to sleep with fewer girls in the future. But that is such a narrow criteria for claiming you’ve “peaked.” Maybe your identity was tied for a long time to the quantity (or even quality) of sex you had, but it sounds like this will soon change, if it hasn’t already. The notion of having “peaked” will soon lose its meaning, because it only makes sense in relation to your current (or past) goals.

You have proven your ability to push through obstacles (game, haters), create (this blog, your books), learn (languages, game, etc.), work independently, and generally succeed at what you set out to accomplish.

Peaked? I think you are just getting going man.

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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Every time I read about a PUA who couldn’t get laid to save his life until he started learning game and then they bang a bunch of chicks but eventually get tired of it, I think that they are secretly gay and never wanted to bang chicks to begin with.

serena
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serena
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Found this post insightful,self awareness is a vastly underrated trait.Listening to yourself at these times is so important.Sounds like you learned a lot from the “game” but you lost something too.
Good luck

Wilson
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Wilson
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Have your iron levels tested. All the menstrual blood you’ve ingested may be catching up with you.

Rakishness
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Rakishness
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This is like Michael Jordan retiring prematurely.

Don’t do it Roosh.

The game needs you!

Dorian
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Dorian
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I went home and stared at myself in the mirror for a long while. I saw the GRAY in my beard and hair

…Dorian Gray?

B
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B
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Disgust is a prerequisite for change; do not mistake it for change itself.

anon1
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anon1
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i know the best writers bleed on their pages so this was an interesting read Roosh.

why not take a temporary break/hiatus rather than quitting alltogether?

it may just be that you need a break from it all, to truly re-appreciate the red pill lifestyle you’ve created and led for the past .

if man is a product of achievements and (self)appreciation, maybe you’ve gone too far in the achievements direction (notches followed by flags, testing things for your readership) and not too much on the self appreciation direction.

As a blunt reply though, its possible your temporary hiatus might just become a permanent one. and you have to be okay with. the readership will live on in some form or another

anon1
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anon1
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*with that

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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You should have taken on an apprentice to pass on your skills to . Hopefully your art form will not be lost .
This sounds like the end is near…

R I P
Roosh International Player

Beidas
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Beidas
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Well you still have your twin goals of destroying feminism & finding true love. Don’t feel that combining them is the best idea tho.

Trouble
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Trouble
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Slightly OT, Roosh. But whatever happened to Chaco? I know you mentioned in one of your postings a LONG time ago you going barhopping with him in the DC area. I knew him from back in the day when we were both beta dudes frequenting camwhore sites and paying girls just to undress on cam (I know, I know). He got into game just before me and turned me onto much of the literature and people involved in game. Curious to what he’s up to now.

M3
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M3
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Honest question.

If you do leave the game, what might you expect to replace it? And if you envision any chance of an LTR, do you feel you can pursue a meaningful one given that you have banged so much, you’re insight into women being one thing, and banged away your ability to bond another thing.. would it even be worth pursuing.

As you said, there will be relapses.

So what is next, if LTR is not in the cards?

A motorcycle and an open road? I second TPM’s recommendation. Keep at RoK. You’ve left enough accumulated knowledge to last men a lifetime in growth.. you can step away if you choose, to follow whatever path you wish. I will always consider this to be the best post you ever wrote:

http://www.rooshv.com/everything-i-know-about-women

Beyond PUA, beyond openers, beyond dark triad, this one piece gets to the heart of it. Simply work to become the best person you can become, and everything will fall into place.

That is the essence of game. And just like that man at the coffee table, you can smile, shake our hands and walk away from this if you so desire.

Anonymous
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Anonymous
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This has been coming for a while. You can see it in Roosh’s articles in the last few months.

There may not be more to the game than chasing pussy… But there is definitely more to being a man than chasing pussy.

BB
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BB
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Yeah, you’re getting older.Which means you can no longer stand silly girls in clubs. You should go for more interesting women, 23 and older, 8+ prime pussy. Quality over quantity. Avoid clubs. Go to other venues: theater, opera, painting exhibitions.
Whatever you do, don’t marry. You’ve still got ten more years of womanizing in you at the top of your game. Become an international man of mistery!

Francis Begbie
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You’ve hinted at this in the past while. Your stuff in the past six months had the same feel that Ferd’s writing did right until he closed down In Mala Fide.

Your website is more about game though. It’s more about being better as a man. It’s part of building the antiuniversity, plugging out of the cathedral, change the wiring and build existence around verisimilitude. You want a cause, it’s buildin the antiuniversity. Although whether it is worthwhile to do so is another thing, if it is too late. I recommend reading Moldbug if you haven’t already.

Either way, good luck with your future plans mate. Be interesting to see where you go next.

Burt
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“If I ever find myself in a funk, complacent and lacking motivation, tired of pussy, of the grind, of running game, I’m going to put on a suit and fuck the ugliest girl I can find.”

Maybe this time you need to try a man’s butt AND then an ugly girl before hopefully finally getting back to the hot chicks.

kinda like falling through dreams like the movie inception.

Stuki
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Stuki
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Unless I’m getting old to the point of senility, you probably have “peaked” in the sense of relating to what I presume is the largest audience for game/PUA writings; college age guys.

The whole club scene is, for most, a young man’s venue. I’d even go so far as to suggest that, say, 21 year old girls, who have few hangups about 35 yo guys, are less receptive to guys that old that they meet in clubs. Just like high school girls tend to dig college age guys, but (except for Matthew McConaughey in Dazed) tend to be a bit creeped out by the subset of them that keeps hanging around high school parties years past graduation.

So, to prevent the distance between you and your audience from getting too large, change your audience. Focus more on how to make pussy an adjunct to a life otherwise well lived, not the entire, hormone fueled, focus of life itself.