The Destructive Merger Of Dating Choice & American Culture

Choice in dating removes the necessity of personal effort. When a man knows that he has choice in the dating market, he will begin to expect more sex while putting in less effort. When I’m in a city that is generally “easy,” I go out later, approach less, and don’t take much time to prepare for a chance at getting laid. I just walk out the door because I know my existence is likely to be good enough. In this type of scenario, the marginal cost of banging an 8 instead of a 7 is not worth a change in my routine.

In the United States, women have more choice in men than their counterparts in any other nation. An American 7 is approached via day, night, and internet 100 times more than girls in Eastern Europe. Not only is she approached more, but she is approached by more desperate men who put her on a pedestal much higher than anywhere else.

As I’ve detailed in the past, choice creates an environment where only the tightest game will be rewarded. Not only will a man in this environment have to approach a lot, but he will have to do so with skill so high that his own father would have died a virgin if forced to do the same.

Choice acts as a “feeder” to create a girl who flakes, overeats, sleeps around, cockblocks, and becomes masculine. Choice feeders include night clubs, Facebook, OK Cupid, game, the iPhone, and any other technology or environment that allows men to approach women in order to get sex.

When I was in Poland recently, I walked around a shopping mall and saw many beautiful girls. I thought to myself, “Even if I bring 50 American guys in this mall right now to approach nonstop for a month, the girls wouldn’t sour. They would be slow to gain weight, lose their femininity, or become rude. Why is that?”

There are two reasons:

1. In Poland, a girl sees an approach as a random encounter with a man. In the United States, a girl sees an approach as a gender issue, rape by the patriarchy, or a means by which women are somehow being objectified. There are factors in Polish culture that prevent the girls from seeing an approach in those terms, while in America we have cultural “enablers” that tell the girl to behave like a trashy sailor or go to battle when interacting with a male.

2. If a Polish girl, after being approached 1000 times on a vacation to Washington DC, goes back home and becomes fat, slutty, and masculine, the approaches would stop. But if she remained in America, men would continue approaching her because of how low their standards have become, a problem that is due to demographics and cultural persecution of masculinity.

“Enablers” are institutions, movements, or memes that tell a woman to embrace the negative features that result from her having a lot of mating choice. Enablers that exist in the culture include feminism, liberalism, anti-fat shaming, anti-slut shaming, divorce laws, and misandry representations in the media.

Feeders and enablers work together to create a death spiral:

Women feel the immediate effect of the feeders in the form of approaches while men feel the immediate effect of the enablers in the form of uglier, bitchy girls who are not relationship material.

Now let’s take a look at Poland:

In Poland, notice how there are less feeders and a complete absence of enablers. In fact, there exists disablers in the form of family pressure to marry along with a strong fat and slut shaming culture to prevent uglification. In fact, the disablers promote beautification.

When an American girl turns 21 and begins to hit the clubs in stride, unburdened by her college social circle, she is unsure how exactly to take being approached so much. It may initially seem neat to her, but then she goes onto Jezebel to read how game is stupid and how even nice guys are evil. She reads advice columns telling her that she can have it all while playing the field in her twenties and even early thirties. She reads a news report about how important Slut Walks are in empowering women. She hears Obama saying how it’s unfair that woman make less than men. And finally she sees a book in Barnes & Noble about how men have turned into little kids that need to man up.

Her mind is unable to resist these influences since they come in the form of a nonstop assault that happens to confirm with what she’s learned about men in her university elective courses. Enabling now takes place. She will begin to see men approaching her as inferiors and as a nuisance, treating them with disdain and disrespect. The uglification process begins soon after, giving her faux self-esteem and confidence in being ugly and masculine. When she hits 25, she is stronger and more empowered than men her age.

She stays single and sleeps with the men who can keep her turned on for a couple hours without saying a bad line. These men are not as handsome as those who approached her when she was 18 and 19, before she began shopping at Lane Bryant, but the marginal cost of being skinny would only get her a guy one point higher. The result is a fat girl who mildly hates men, never reproduces, and has well over 50 sexual partners by the time her body gives up releasing eggs.

I call it a death spiral because every additional set of approaches causes the erosion of habits and beliefs that were meant to preserve her appearance and femininity. She can slack off because the guys keep coming and the greatest media influences in her life tell her to embrace the fat. They even put out flawed studies that tell her being fat is healthy. In countries with a death spiral dating market, you will see increasingly overweight and useless women who still believe they deserve Mr. Perfect.

The American cultural elite will promote any method or policy which increases a woman’s choice while simultaneously limiting a man’s. You would think they would therefore embrace game since it gives women more choice in men, but it gives men greater relative choice, especially for the alpha male who can easily swoop up a boatload of notches via one-night stands.

The elite will therefore actively seek those methods, behaviors, and policies that give women a greater proportional amount of choice than men. It turns out that internet dating is perhaps their greatest tool, as even the most pan-cis-trans feminist with shaved head but unshaved legs has a profile. In fact, internet dating, combined with the smartphone, are the two most amazing male screening tools to ever be invented, giving even average girls more male attention that female celebrities received a generation ago. Every time you send an email blast on OK Cupid to get a few lukewarm responses, if any at all, a feminist smiles. Every time you approach a girl in a club and bang her within a few hours through the use of game, that same feminist will ask the authorities to investigate if your empowerment was actually illegal in the form of rape.

Feminist sympathizers have grouped gender behavior into two categories: choice enhancers and choice blockers. The former will increase how much choice women in a society have while the latter will decrease it, since it gives more power to men or causes them to “drop out.”

Choice Enhancers:
Technology
Social networking
Restaurants/bars/happy hours/gentrification
Birth control/abortion

Choice Blockers:
Counter culture movements (MGTOW, MRA)
Game
Love tourists
Foreign brides
Porn
Sex dolls

Blockers will be viciously attacked by all women (not just feminists), because they decrease a woman’s relative choice compared to men. Have you ever heard of a woman crying that a black-owned barber shop was getting shut down to be replaced with a wine and cheese bar? Never. But the second they read a story about a lonely and shy American man finding a Ukrainian wife, they lose their shit. In fact, it’s easy to predict the response of future inventions or behaviors by just asking yourself who it gives more choice to. If it gives more choice to men, there will be some group that will push for it to be criminalized, regulated, or banned outright.

As you can now see, the solution to our problems is not simply a matter of beating feminism and shutting down Facebook. There are multiple factors working simultaneously to destroy women. I predict the death spiral will impact other countries as the same feeders and enablers present in America make their way around the world.

Or will it? While I do think countries will get worse before they get better, many have a built-in cultural resistance that prevents enablers from completely taking over like they have in America. Why is it that a place like Brazil is so open to American-style feminism while a place like Ukraine is not? What is it that accelerates or limits the damaging effects of giving women choice in the dating market? These are questions I will answer in the future.

Read Next: The Number One Corrupter Of Women

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Frost
7 years ago

Excellent post but my read of the situation is different.

The issue is not male choice Vs female choice. Logically, if sexual market power is going up for some women, it must be going down for others. Intra-gender status is a zero sum game.

What’s really going on is that female choice is being re-distributed from the top-tier women to the bottom feeders. Consider Dagonet’s tweet from earleir this morning:

“Last week I had crazy oneitis for this girl. Now that I’ve captured her soul and gotten the bang, I’ve lost all interest. I’m ruined haha.”

In a traditionalist sexual marketplace, top-tier women would be able to lock down top tier men like (not to brag or anything) Dagonet, me, you, etc.

The sexual marketplace that we have robs them of their chance at living the feminine dream of marriage to an alpha male.

The sexual/culture war is a crusade by the unloveable dregs of female society to free up the tight supply of alpha males.

Wolff
Wolff
7 years ago

One significant mediator is city vs. rural. In America, it’s well known that rural areas vote red and have high marriage rates, low divorce rates, and strong nuclear families. Lack of choice is probably an important factor, as are wholesome cultural cues that are perhaps related to the lack of choice.

It’s cities like Washington, DC, where you’ve cut your teeth, that there are bars on every corner (and several in between), massive participation in online dating, and mandatory smartphone purchases.

For your commentary about America writ large to have any purchase, you should spend time in more rural areas like western NC, which still have educated, cute women who, I imagine, are not unlike the Polish women you so favor.

Jordan
Jordan
7 years ago

Great post….and please answer those questions in the near future.

4corners
4corners
7 years ago

Are ‘they’ working on banning/regulating porn? Is it just a matter of time?

I’ve given up porn, so this is an academic question for me. But:

1. Porn depedestalizes women (check out Danger and Play on Miss Delaware).
2. The marginal cost of approaching “the unloveable dregs” vs. jerking off to 10’s at home doesn’t work in fat girls’ favor; men drop out.
3. At least some porn is violent and might appear misogynist to reasonable people, and become a scapegoat for the rest.

El Guapo
El Guapo
7 years ago

This is one of the best articles of yours i’ve read. I think many of these points are gaining in acceptance however slowly. Knowledge of truth doesn’t always equal acceptance of truth but the reality is becoming plainer and plainer: feminism has changed men (for better or worse, men have adapted) but it is destroying women.

Banger
Banger
7 years ago

Irrefutable logic… good visuals too.

Dude
Dude
7 years ago

some of your best work yet

Big Ern
Big Ern
7 years ago

It only appears to women that there is an endless amount of choice (of men). The reality however is that that *must* be an illusion; there simply aren’t that many men for *each* woman. At least not in the final accounting, since people tend to pair off. So, the illusion is only true at certain points in time, but not in general, and certainly not in perpetuity. But, most will stay on OKCupid their whole wretched lives, searching, never satisfied, ever transfixed by the mirage which from a distance looked so bountiful, increasingly dreading the possibility of an awful truth which begins to unfold, though never quite giving up hope.

(The awful truth of course being speed-dating events at 35 years old with a bunch of Indian engineers, haha)

rivsdiary
7 years ago

roosh = the man.

Mr Lemon
Mr Lemon
7 years ago

Amazing post Roosh.

What is the likely outcome of all this?

Every time a similar situation occurred in history, the net result was war.

I see no reason it should differ this time.

Westsider
2 years ago
Reply to  Mr Lemon

The core cause behind all of this is food abundance. Ergo, loose mating behaviors, loose family units, loose disciplining of offspring, etc.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCB88E66Xk89epAcQPn2NAEA

We are well an truly overpopulated as a planet, which is evincing itself in increasing stress on the biospheric systems supplying us with the basics – food and water.

Eventually, rising temperatures will cause the the bread baskets to desertify, human population – having already overshot Earth’s carrying capacity – will start to die off (rapidly) of the ensuing famine, and family structures/mating behaviors/societal laxness will re-tighten, in an era where the historic norm as returned – food scarcity.

Joe Silva
Joe Silva
7 years ago

Brazil was not open to feminism. It was pushed down our throats by successive Marxist governments and corrupt NGOs financed by Foundations such as Ford’s and Rockefeller’s. There is also a TV network with soap operas, which is a tool for the left. Brazil used to be a very conservative country. You would see the half naked bikini girl at the beach, but she would be engaged and expecting a very traditional wedding at church.

Ukraine has experienced communism first hand, and know very well what it is to have 30 million of their citizens murdered by Stalin. They have been vaccinated against delusion.

Roosh, if you go ahead in this field, you will need to immerse yourself in the study of Cultural Marxism, the School of Frankfurt, etc. You will probably like http://www.henrymakow.com site. Start with the articles that connect feminism with communism.

TexAveryWolf
TexAveryWolf
7 years ago

Isn’t it ironic how feminism vilifies masculinity but women that embrace it turn out masculine?

POLAND IS NOT SO GREAT
POLAND IS NOT SO GREAT
7 years ago

POLAND HAS A LOT OF FEMINISM MOVEMENTS LATELY.
POLAND IS GOING DOWNWARDS BADLY

You can read about it here:

Marriage with a polish woman – Heaven or Forever Hell

Poland Reality 2013:

If a divorce is initiated after a male cheats on his spouse,
the male is likely to lose custody of his children, 50% of his wealth
and be forced with larges financial obligations to his exwife
and to the children, for the rest of his life.

If a divorce is initiated after it is discovered that a female has
cheated on her spouse,
then the male is still likely to lose custody of his children (the
ones that are his)
and be forced to pay with large financial obligations even to the
children that aren’t his.

Judges in divorce cases are a large majority women,
but the laws of divorce are also bended on women’s total advantage.

Marriage is, in short, the real everyday story of male liability at
all costs and in nearly all situations.
It is the product of the divorce laws that, in effect,
removed any protection for the men
and replaced them with a system that incentivizes the initiation of
divorce by women,
regardless of their actions.

What are your opinions?

La mouette
La mouette
7 years ago

13 -> Don’t get married then. As easy as that.

Here is a gem that will cheer you up : http://intentious.com/2012/10/26/man-exposes-penis-during-slutwalk/

A man shows his dick during a Brazilian slutwalk and get ganged up on. Oh the irony.

european
european
7 years ago

the end result of the death spiral is not that most women somehow win and most men lose.

in reality it means that more and more ugly fat whores are pumped and dumped. few people get married and society slowly declines into wilderness.

i’d take russia, ukraine or poland over that. even for most women its a better proposition whether they know it or not

oldskool
oldskool
7 years ago

Roosh, your posts cause me to look around at my environment with a new perspective. Thank you.

GuessHandsOn
7 years ago

Bro,

You shouldn’t criticize ‘non-stop’ approaching. As in:

“I call it a death spiral because every additional set of approaches causes the erosion of habits and beliefs that were meant to preserve her appearance and femininity.”

Quoting from Bang blurb:

“Now imagine something for a second. For me to go from hopeless zero to a guy who could pick up pretty girls consistently, how many women do you think I had to talk to and get rejected by?

300? 400? 700?

I gotta be around the thousand mark by now. In terms of all men in the world, I’m in the top 1% of being rejected by the most women. But in terms of how many women I’ve banged, I’m probably in the top 1% as well. ”

Thank you Roosh for eroding the femininity and appearance of thousand women.

Anonymous
Anonymous
7 years ago

americunt style feminism is in every nation now…even middle east(except the promiscuity)
evenn in indian cities its thrown around in average circles …from not gettin laid to cant gettin laid.
how do the east asian n eastern europeans keep em out…cuuz they in africa as well. george carlin explaind feminusts pwrfetly.
they care bout havin the edge socially n money…women r being sterlized by force in uzbekistan n they dont care. but all breaks lose if u xall em ugly or sluts

solo
solo
7 years ago

Very interesting. Keep these posts coming.

Meantoad
Meantoad
7 years ago

Roosh! Long time lurker and living the life. The Proper male one…
By far on of your best best posts.Keep it up.

Ovid
Ovid
7 years ago

Roosh or you or I would not have to approach 1000 women if they were not enthusiastically partaking in the spiral and becoming combative, masculinized whores. Your great grandfather might have approached 10 women in his whole life. Women can and should be able to handle a little bit of male attention. It’s when they’re fawned over, idolized, and encouraged to attention whore on an hourly basis that they find themselves overloaded, and stop being grounded, feminine girls and become little conceited Hollywood starlets from their cheap studio apartments in Big City, USA.

People follow their leaders. In Poland their leaders (political, religious, family) encourage virtue and family life. In America they encourage vanity, selfishness, hedonism, and feminist ideology. Girls therefore willingly hop into the death spiral that Roosh so well described.

Mr Lemon
Mr Lemon
7 years ago

Actually I amend my earlier prediction.

“War” may not be the ultimate result of this death spiral.

“Mormons taking over US society” may be more likely.

Kris
Kris
7 years ago

Bravo good sir. Bravo *clap clap clap*

Anonymous
Anonymous
7 years ago

Great post.

Everyone is always telling Roissy to “write a book,” but he’s probably best as a hit and run blogger.

Your take can easily be expanded.

A good book of cultural criticism would make you famous.

Title it “The Smartphone Has Killed Love & Other Essays” and you’re on your way. “IPhone” would be better but Apple will sue your ass. 😉

Mississippi Girl
Mississippi Girl
7 years ago

I am sorry but Washington D.C. ≠ America. You seem to want to base all assumption about America works on one city. Unless you have been all over America you can’t generalize it like is. If feminism is so powerful in America why do I live in state were people want end welfare for women who have children out of wedlock, restrict abortion, get rid of planned parenthood and pressure young couples who have children out of wedlock to marry? I have yet to met any of the women you describe in your blog. Many of the women in my social group enjoy and love men, do not treat them as the enemy.People up north are known to be a bit ruder and more arrogant versus the south due to how fast pace their life style is. So they may have something to do with it. Expand your mind more before you judge so harshly.