The Grim Reaper

I remember ten years ago when the thought of death put me into an immediate panic. I couldn’t bear to think that all I am will cease to exist. I didn’t want to believe that one day everything I did to become the best man I could would disappear for all eternity. I’d push the thoughts out of my mind like I’m trained to do by Western culture.

Now it’s rare that a day goes by where I don’t think of the grim reaper. I hold death real close to my chest, using it as the main way to act instead of waiting for tomorrow. The reaper pushes me to go against what my upbringing has indoctrinated me to do, to fit my peg body into the college-career-mortgage-marriage hole.

The more I think of death and the more I use it as a tool, of knowing that there is a clock on my life that ticks every second of every day with a random deadline that I can’t predict, the more it has pushed me to take the tough steps of making big changes in my life.

It’s now clear to me what I have to do so that I will not be upset when the end is near: I have to complete as many of my dreams and goals as quickly as possible. It’s a bucket list I must work on while still very much alive, not when I turn 50 or get diagnosed with a life-ending illness. I’m in the prime of my life, but I’m living as if it will soon end.

I believe the more times you can say “been there, done that” on your death bed to all the things you set out to do, the more peacefully you can go. These can range from the insignificant to the lofty:

  • Banging a big Brazilian booty
  • Writing a book
  • Learning a foreign language
  • Starting a successful business
  • Living in another country for one year
  • Procreating
  • Playing a few songs on a musical instrument
  • Fucking cheap hookers who loved you all night long
  • Paying off debt
  • Owning a restaurant or bar
  • Starting a nonprofit organization
  • Beating someone up with your bare hands

While it will be impossible to complete everything you want to do before you die, there is a point where you feel like you’ve done enough, where you’ve gone far above your human duty and any extra day you live on earth is gravy on top of what already was an exciting life where you acted instead of waited. When it’s your time to go, you can say to yourself, “I had a good run,” and close your eyes with no regrets. This is what I want.

67 Comments

  1. Anonymous January 23, 2012 at 9:20 am

    Wow

  2. alex January 23, 2012 at 9:34 am

    Amen! You havent by any chance read Heidegger have you? He’s basically saying what your saying, and is one of the few western philosofers also appreciated by the oriental culture

    1. Dirk Diggler May 13, 2017 at 10:53 am

      Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy begger who could drink you under the table…
      https://youtu.be/hPFClJGqjBQ

  3. Hendrix&Marley= January 23, 2012 at 9:36 am

    Awesome

  4. Zorro January 23, 2012 at 10:06 am

    I notice the first on your list was fucking a big Brazilian booty!

    I’m learning Braz Portuguese because of you, man, and I’m moving to Rio!

  5. JackBlack January 23, 2012 at 10:17 am

    I’m with you all the way until the last one — this sounds like what someone who’s never actually been in a real fight would say.

  6. Go Getter January 23, 2012 at 10:29 am

    I have a couple tears running down my cheeks right now man,past 5 years have been the most fucked up i’ve ever had.

    Very inspirational post(to me at least) thank you roosh

  7. zarzuelazen January 23, 2012 at 10:56 am

    #6, regarding the last post on Roosh’s list, I propose a no-holds-barred boxing match between us and this ‘Grim Reaper’. In one corner, its each of us fighting, in the opposite corner, a big savage ape trying to punch our brains out. You think that’s gonna stop you? Watch this YouTube video, right now:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSYtQy9EqTA

    ‘I’m gonna show you, how great I am’

  8. dickbutt January 23, 2012 at 11:01 am

    it’s interesting that you have this fear that never even crosses my mind

  9. pantolones January 23, 2012 at 11:42 am

    At my age,it gets more crucial. But it its easier said than done. Most people don’t have this hunger,ambition,or instinct that others have. Something drives them. I don’t believe in god so it’s something else altogether. I wish I had it. The desire and will to at least make a decent attempt at having a more fulfilling life. Being financially well off helps,but that’s just an excuse for most of us who just don’t have that killer instinct.
    Congratulations on having that,Roosh.

  10. Giovonny January 23, 2012 at 12:10 pm

    Death is my favorite motivator. I figure I have about 15,000-25,000 days left to live. Half of those will be as an old man. And, another 35% of that time I will be asleep. Shit, I gotta go!!

  11. Tony January 23, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    I agree with your philosophy and have done everything on your list by 40, except “own” the bar. I did pay for my undergrad and grad school in DC by bartending, which was great because the women try to pick you up – so you catch or release as you prefer.

  12. Rivelino January 23, 2012 at 12:17 pm

    yeah my new slogan is,

    DEATH ALWAYS WINS

    DAW

  13. Tony January 23, 2012 at 12:19 pm

    Missed the non-profit too, but I’m working on an iPhone app that allows your social network to fund your “cause” (eg $1 to your select chariry per mile of the marathon you run, etc)

  14. (r)Evoluzione January 23, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    Roosh,

    Spiritual warriors from many cultures advocate keeping the knowledge and awareness of one’s death close at hand at all times. You enumerated the reasons for this very well.

    Carlos Castaneda wrote that your death is an advisor, and one that will never lie to you.

    Great, great post. One of my all time favorites.

  15. Nomad77 January 23, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    There is a simple way of saying this, I believe it is: to die without regrets 🙂

    My goal was simply this. If I knew I would die today how much would I regret it. And I am happy to say at this point in my life, not much 🙂

  16. Giovonny January 23, 2012 at 12:51 pm

    “Carlos Castaneda wrote that your death is an advisor, and one that will never lie to you”

    He also had a harem of 5 women that he choose based on looks, intelligence, and innocence.

    They all committed suicide after he died.

  17. The Rationalist January 23, 2012 at 1:07 pm

    This does seem like checking off a list though. What about transcendence? Or doing something to help the world?

    But hey, overall I agree (maybe with the exception of the beating part). Enjoy life. Do no harm.

    1. Roosh January 23, 2012 at 2:56 pm

      The list I put up is not my actual list. I put it up for example’s sake.

  18. O-face January 23, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    Thanks Roosh for suggesting the 50 cent Robert Greene book, its keeping me inspired over a difficult confusing time

  19. Maciano January 23, 2012 at 2:03 pm

    This is why I always go out when I can. Never a dull moment, no time for dull people, no dull jobs no way, no regrets.

    I would admit that after having seeing several loved ones die, in the proverbial sense, in my arms, I definitely feel I need to have saved someone before I die.

  20. Mr.GM January 23, 2012 at 2:38 pm

    Wow.

    At the and of the day, that’s all we guys from the Rooshv community want – A Life with no regrets, free from the shackels of society.

  21. Anonymous January 23, 2012 at 2:59 pm

    I just learned a few hours ago, that a former friend/acquaintance drank herself to death at age 39. One bottle of wine a night, plus extra on the weekends. Sudden liver/kidney failure (with ignored warning signs and doctor advice ignored).

    This post hits home.

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:13 pm

      Kidney failure been there done that in my late teens & early twenties, saw a lot of my mates on dialysis and transplanted go….it’s no big deal, there isn’t anything you can do about it. Yeah it used to send me nuts thinking about how good guys got wiped out especially after a few drinks but what can you do…..the rage goes eventually!
      Just enjoy yourself and do something worthwhile with your life, DO what YOU want with your life, but don’t fuck people over to do it!
      Don’t fear death, fear a bad way to go if anything, use that if it helps motivate you. I just pity those corporate wankers I used to work with….and they think they’ve got it all worked out! 🙂

  22. Turd Ferguson January 23, 2012 at 3:31 pm

    Knocking it out of the park again…I think an acceptance of death enables you to not give a fuck, and not giving a fuck is the ultimate triumph. Easier said than done though.

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:19 pm

      Go and ask to visit a paediatric Renal Unit or kids cancer ward and see how you feel after that. I think that should focus your mind on not giving a fuck!!

  23. Jordan January 23, 2012 at 4:31 pm

    GREAT POST ROOSH!

  24. Juhana January 23, 2012 at 5:17 pm

    Roosh rediscovers ancient truths, enshrined in scripture long ago:

    “It is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of every man; the living should take this to heart.” (Ecclesiastes 7:2)

    Good post. The fact that it echoes ageless wisdom makes it no less apropos.

  25. ALF the quarrelsome January 23, 2012 at 5:28 pm

    Posts like these are the reason I support roosh with my hard earned dollars.

  26. Anon January 23, 2012 at 7:08 pm

    I just learned a few hours ago, that a former friend/acquaintance drank herself to death at age 39. One bottle of wine a night, plus extra on the weekends. Sudden liver/kidney failure (with ignored warning signs and doctor advice ignored).

    This post hits home.

    One bottle of wine a night and more on the weekends? That doesn’t add up…she might have been taking ibuprofen or vicodin on a daily basis (which are half ibuprofen). That combined with the daily alcohol consumption probably lead to her liver failure.

    It takes far more alcohol on a daily basis than that to cause liver failure at such a young age.

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:21 pm

      Not always, she may had a genetic condition too or a fatty liver…does it matter how much she drank, she’s still dead!

  27. Sincere January 23, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    @16 – Funny, I was thinking of Castaneda when I read this post as well. The passage about the chills and Death’s touch will stay with me until the end.

  28. smiley January 23, 2012 at 8:38 pm

    This article helped me get over my fear of death somewhat:

    http://www.naturalism.org/death.htm

    I didn’t even fully understand his argument, but I was glad someone tackled on, and provided a somewhat comprehensive explanation, as to the question I’d been pondering about myself for some time: how death will ‘feel’ from our perspective.

    In short, if he’s right, you will always find yourself in the present moment, fully alive. How does anything else even make sense? I no longer have a fear of “nothingness”.

  29. The Private Man January 23, 2012 at 9:32 pm

    I have a unique problem.

    At almost 50 years old, my bucket list is pretty much done.

    I’ve had an interesting life.

    I’m at the point where all that I wish is to pass along wisdom to younger men so they have the skills to fulfill their own dreams.

    I ride my motorcycle more carefully now so that I am alive in order to post on my blog and comment on other blogs.

    Shit, I don’t even own a television so I can spend more time writing.

    When the time comes for me to shuffle off this mortal coil (be it tomorrow or in 30 years hence), I will have few regrets.

    Private Man’s free advice to young men: Study history. It will set you free.

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:24 pm

      Shit man, I’m 51 and I’ve haven’t even started lol don’t slow down dude, speed up!!

  30. Professor Mentu January 24, 2012 at 12:12 am

    Powerful. Thanks for the inspiration, and know your advice will not go unheeded.

  31. Rob January 24, 2012 at 12:22 am

    All time great post, great job roosh

  32. Paradise World January 24, 2012 at 10:44 am

    I used to hate it when people would say “Life is short”. I counter that this was a fatalistic and negative view of life. I prefer to believe that life is as long and fulfilling as you want it to be. But perhaps what you say is what many successful people believe. I was reading a biography on Tom Ford (well known mens fashion designer) and he said something similar. Steve Jobs did too.

    Still, I have a problem thinking that life is short. I don’t want to rush life. I want to enjoy and savor it.

  33. Anonymous January 24, 2012 at 12:00 pm

    I want to write a book of poems

  34. JohnnyD January 24, 2012 at 12:36 pm

    Amen! What’s that famous quote? Something like, “it’s all about the life in your years, not the years in your life”

  35. Dan Fletcher January 24, 2012 at 12:40 pm

    “The Way of the Samurai is found in death. Meditation on inevitable death should be performed daily. Every day when one’s body and mind are at peace, one should meditate upon being ripped apart by arrows, rifles, spears and swords, being carried away by surging waves, being thrown into the midst of a great fire, being struck by lightning, being shaken to death by a great earthquake, falling from thousand-foot cliffs, dying of disease or committing seppuku at the death of one’s master. And every day without fail one should consider himself as dead.”

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:26 pm

      Sorry mate I don’t agree with any of that. Samurai thought that way because that was their life & purpose. Focus on living to the max not death, fuck death! LIVE!!

  36. Dan Fletcher January 24, 2012 at 12:42 pm

    Just recently got done with the 50th Law, per your recommendation. Was an excellent book.

    I thought Greene had gone off his rocker when I heard he was doing a book with 50 cent. Upon further examination, I realized he was just practicing his own 48 laws.

    1. Cat March 23, 2015 at 5:49 pm

      33 is cool as well!

  37. Redleg January 24, 2012 at 1:22 pm

    If you want to learn a musical instrument, I suggest bass guitar. It’s easy to pick up, hard to master, and most importantly it is most enjoyed when jamming amongst friends (it can be boring alone).

    I took up bass and taught myself three years ago, ditching the fear that I’d look stupid as an adult amateur. If I could learn, you could easily do it.

  38. Magnum January 24, 2012 at 2:20 pm

    Good post Roosh

  39. steve January 24, 2012 at 6:58 pm

    i would include: make a girl cry. it brings great joy to me to see the tears come down her face. thats when you know you have her right where you want her

  40. Leo Tolstoy January 24, 2012 at 11:12 pm

    Few things are more pathetic than defining your life’s accomplishments by the number of vaginas you’ve played with.

    Imagine how much you could accomplish if you weren’t wasting so much time trying to stick your dick into some random girl’s cunt.

    A very wise man once said:

    Women are the chief stumbling block in a man’s career. It’s hard to love a woman and do anything. There’s only one way of having love conveniently without its being a hindrance – that’s marriage.

    Just as you can carry a load and do something with your hands when the load is tied on your back, and that’s marriage. And that’s what I felt when I was married. My hands were suddenly set free. But to drag that load about you without marriage, your hands will always be so full that you can do nothing.

    Look at [2 guys who are womanizing bachelors]. They’ve ruined their careers for the sake of women.

  41. Anonymous January 25, 2012 at 1:27 am

    Roosh is not a true Alpha. He is a fake Alpha. Real Alphas don’t refer to themselves as Alphas. Real Alphas don’t need game. They walk into a room and simply because they’re so good looking all the girls want to sleep with them immediately, thus they don’t need game. If you require game you’re just faking it till you make it. Go out there and find a really, really, objectively good looking guy. I’m talking tall, muscular, handsome. You’ll immediately feel inferior and even if he doesn’t utter a word of game you will be under his shadow all night.

  42. Capsaicin January 25, 2012 at 3:38 pm

    @#48 Anonymous

    That’s not necessarily true at all.

    Look at the GOP primary.

    Romney is tall, lean, and handsome. Gingrich is average height, portly, and average looking.

    Yet, because Gingrich is bold and witty (and full of himself), while Romney is more tepid and bland (and genuinely not self-absorbed), Gingrich owns almost every room they share together. Gingrich is the true alpha here.

    Gingrich is a far superior debater than Romney; it’s the only reason why he’s still in the race.

    The great looking but boring and passive guy will often lose out to the average looking but fun and take-charge guy, meaning the latter is the man most people look to and want to be around. Thus, the man with social dominance is ultimately the truest alpha. A man with great looks doesn’t inspire anybody to follow him, but a man with a powerful personality does.

    … BTW, I think Gingrich is a pretty sketchy character and as such, unfit for the presidency; Romney is a much better general election candidate and would make for a more sensible president.

  43. Krauser January 25, 2012 at 7:17 pm

    Done all of those except procreate and own a bar. Good list.

  44. zarzuelazen January 26, 2012 at 1:16 am

    “But somewhere along the line you changed, you stopped being you.
    You let people stick a finger in your face and tell you youre no good, and when things got hard, you started looking for something to blame, like a big shadow.
    Let me tell you something you already know, the world aint all sunshine and rainbows, its a very mean and nasty place and I dont care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.
    You, me, or nobody, is gonna hit as hard as life; but it aint about how hard you hit, its about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward, how much you can take and keep moving forward.
    Thats how winning is done.”

    “Cause if youre willin to go through all the battling you gotta go through to get to where you wanna get, whos got the right to stop you.
    I mean maybe some of you guys got something you never finished, something you really want to do, something you never said to somebody, something.
    And youre told no even after you pay your dues, whos got the right to tell you that, who? Nobody.
    Its your right to listen to your gut, it aint nobodys right to say no, after you earn the right to be where you want to be and do what you want to do.”

    “Now if you know what youre worth, then go out and get what youre worth.
    But youve gotta be willing to take the hits.
    And not pointing fingers saying you aint where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody.
    Cowards do that and that aint you!
    Youre better than that!”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSYtQy9EqTA

  45. Eric January 26, 2012 at 3:02 pm

    @35 – Study history written by who?

  46. anon January 30, 2012 at 5:03 am

    @47 Your quote sucks an enormously large cock. “marriage is the only way to chase your personal dreams”???? what a brainwashed clown

    @48, you’re obviously super young. Alpha is not defined by strictly your looks. You’ve been watching too many bieber videos. Now go flat iron your hair and score some neon green nikes. Roosh shits all over you, you feel inferior, hence your hate speech

  47. unlucky February 3, 2012 at 5:00 pm

    so what advice do you have for someone who started learning game and when just starting to get some results got herpes? this is something i have almost never seen discussed on sites like this and am curious about since there is so much talk about banging dozens of women raw dog yet magically never getting common stds. i speak as someone who has only fucked 8 women and got the herp from a solid 8 who did not come off as skanky. throws a stick in your spokes for learning game that’s for damn sure. either there is a lot of denial or everyone who has fucked a lot of women has it and doesnt show symptoms. just curious about a community viewpoint here because i do believe the message this site puts forward.

  48. Pingback: It Is Your Life « Sober Down Under

  49. madmax August 30, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    great post. I see old age as death already. I have lost a lot of time, mainly due to ignorance ( I was completely fucked by negative beliefs about me and life in general). I have learned a lot in the last few years, but I am already in my late 30’s. Once I’ll be 50, it will be over. I mean, at 50 we’ll all look like shit and life will be more limited unless you have money. So there’s no time to waste. Way to go Roosh. I remember a book by Castaned where there was written ‘A man becomes a warrior when he becomes aware that death will tap him on his shoulder’.

  50. Quintus Curtius February 15, 2013 at 9:34 pm

    The inimitable Roosh. Priceless, as always. You might enjoy reading the works of Seneca, Cicero, and Lucretius. The Stoics and Epicureans had wonderful arguments as to why we should not fear death. And they all mirror your ideas.

  51. Dohn Joe September 8, 2014 at 2:58 am

    If you’d have regrets going today then it is your mindset and remaining emotional neuroticism which must be addressed, no amount of life accomplishment will change that, not tomorrow nor 50 years from now. End each day by thinking about something you are proud of yourself or otherwise grateful for and start each new day thinking about your dreams and planning your current goals. Finally mentor those to whom you can comfortably pass your batons, to maintain your creations and keep your dreams alive long after you are gone. You will then find that your mortality is really just a formality.