Previously: The Thrill Is Gone
“The moment a man questions the meaning and value of life, he is sick, since objectivity neither has any existence; by asking this question one is merely admitting to a store of unsatisfied libido to which something else must have happened, a kind of fermentation leading to sadness and depression.”
-Freud
“[Men] are born for the solid earth, not for the water. And naturally they won’t think. They are made for life, not for thought. Yes, and he who thinks, what’s more, he who makes thought his business, he may go far in it, but he has bartered the solid earth for the water all the same, and one day he will drown.”
–Steppenwolfe
I’m sitting on a pile of money.
I have three monthly expenses: cell phone, hosting for this site, and student loans, which are very low (public university). I can pay off those 4% interest loans now but I rather have the cash flow.
I live like I’m poor. I can afford to buy a car but I don’t want one. I can get my own place but what’s the point if I’m not staying long. I never liked dining out. I’m getting close to the level of cash I had before I went on my trip last year, and I barely do any work. At work my manager asked me if I wanted to add some more shifts, but I declined.
I sat on the kitchen table and looked at all the Black Friday advertisements. There’s a lot of things I can buy right now: nicer winter coat, boots, fancy SLR camera, and better laptop. But I don’t need them. I looked through the fliers for an hour and the only thing that got me out the door was K-Mart’s sale of thermal sweaters for $3.97 each. My mom and sister asked me what I want for Christmas and I told them to get me a card. If you said to me I had a month to live I wouldn’t buy or change anything.
What a weird place to be in with no dreams, no goal of conquer.
A few years ago someone told me, “Sometimes it’s better to want something than to have it.” I understand that now. Wanting puts you in an insecure state of mind that distracts you from the big questions which reveal the absurdity of most of what we do. It distracts us from our existence.
So I’ll hit the road again. I’ll have tons of interesting experiences—more than I’m having here, for sure. But without purpose it can be just as shallow to rack up countries like it is women. What’s going to guide me to a glorious end? What will motivate me to get up when I fall? What will make me a better person?
Maybe having a kid would do it. I can go to Brazil, marry a beautiful girl, and try to crack it there. That’d keep me challenged for at least a few years. For the majority of human beings, having a kid solves the purpose problem. But no, I rather remain single. Monogamy to me seems like early retirement from the best parts of life.
You know how when someone is sure to die they put them in a hospice so they are as comfortable as possible? I feel like I’m in life’s hospice. Just fucking around to entertain myself, wishing the clock wasn’t moving so fast. I’m not rich but this is how rich people must feel. It’s a hollow feeling. Not unhappy or sad, just hollow.
It’s winter in DC man. The cold weather and short days get everyone really down. Wait for spring with warm weather, mini-skirts, and sun dresses.
Hi Roosh,
Love your blog, man. Keep up the good work and make sure you post from wherever you are.
I just came back from a cool trip to the Dominican Republic and am planning on a trip through South America.
The U.S. sucks so get out while you can.
Good luck.
By the way this kid could be biting your stilo.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28049776/
Yeah staying single is the best thing Roosh.lots of women in their late 20’s -30’s will push marriage right away instead of dating to have fun.Its like you take one out to dinner and she is asking you about marriage before the salad even arrives to your table.
Hollowness?get used to it.It just seems now adays that Im just trying to keep myself “entertained with something”just to out do the feeling of emptiness.or distract myself with something interesting.
Brazil sounds good, but Brazilian women are very Jealous.But what a beautiful counrty.I loved visiting there.
We all are just saving our money these days in these uncertain times or trying to.to bad we cant save our happiness if our life depended on it.
Are sexy Brazilian girls down to marry us American -Persian hybrids?
“It’s winter in DC man.”
Dead on.
“I just came back from a cool trip to the Dominican Republic and am planning on a trip through South America.
The U.S. sucks so get out while you can.”
Dead on again. This is the kind of positive talk that will get you out of your doldrums.
Buy a plane ticket.
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Real Hip-Hop: Shyheim, On And On feat June Luva.
Or start taking extacy.
“What’s going to guide me to a glorious end? What will motivate me to get up when I fall? What will make me a better person?”
Deep thought is good, but you are over thinking this.
“Glorious end?”
Who says you get one? If you are lucky if you get shot in a barbers chair or in front of a famous steakhouse.
The rest of us end up in a hole filed with lime.
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Real Hip-Hop: Shyheim, On And On feat June Luva.
You are in mourning. Mourning your past life. See, the way I see it is that your conquest of all things female has been so all encompassing, that now that it’s not there, if feels like there is a huge hole in your life. It happens to a lot of people. I’ve heard numerous stories about sports coaches and business executives that died shortly after they were forced to retire. Why? Because they weren’t strong enough to find another purpose for their life. The thing is, there isn’t a huge hole in your life… there’s a huge opportunity. An opportunity to go and do something great.
Doug’s last blog post: TMI Thursday: Work Edition.
You are what you make of yourself.
Find yourself a value system. What do you believe in that is positive? What is it that only interests YOU? What are some things you looked up to before but you’ve forgotten about?
This is the important step. Maybe before getting the Girl was the challenge. Now that you’ve accomplished that to a sufficient degree, you may have found yourself in a situation where you’ve forgotten about everything else.
For me, I remembered that I have very many wants in my life, and they are things that can never be sufficiently accomplished, which in effect keep me wanting them even more. For instance, learning to play an instrument like the Piano at a difficult level, learning to play tennis, etc. There is so much in this world to WANT that are not material things. Material things are CHEAP and EASY to get. Life is beautiful, as cliche and cheesy as that sounds, when you strive to attain what is NOT EASY and CHEAP.
You know I find it hard to believe that between this blog and the previous, you still have people suggesting that Roosh chase more ass, see more skirts, travel more, have more fun, go to clubs, etc etc. Do you just not get it?? It’s like telling your friend who has a hangover to just take a few shots to make the problem go away.
The problem Roosh has here is a problem of the soul. Or something from within. It won’t be solved by tagging more ass or seeing more beautiful women, or wandering around more strange streets in cities he’s never been to. The problems of the soul will follow you around wherever you go. YOU CANNOT TAKE A VACATION FROM YOURSELF.
Suggesting that he distract himself with more meaningless distractions as some sort of remedy to his obvious issue, a lack of meaning and purpose in life, is doing him a disservice, and I’m sure he’s intelligent enough to realize that for himself.
To Roosh, I say hang in there man. I’ve gone through similar feelings to what you’re experiencing, albeit for different reasons. It will take some soul searching and a re-orientation of your life and priorities, but you will get there. True, long-term happiness is an inside job and it starts with a change in mindset and perspective and goals. Happiness can be found when you learn to find beauty and amazement in even the smallest details of life. It’s found when you learn to appreciate everything you have, your life’s experiences, your potential and possibilities of discovering more. And having something to live for beyond your carnal needs. It’s found by helping others and feeling you are contributing to the whole to make a difference. Running around in a never-ending goal of more sexual conquests is not a meaningful goal. It will be fun, but it won’t make you happy. And that’s the problem I see with a lot of the guys giving you suggestions, they don’t seem to realize the difference between fun and long-term happiness. They are not the same.
I think everything is going to work out fine for you, bro. You’re clearly an intelligent and insightful guy. I’ve never met you and it’s a bit funny that I’m typing up a lengthy reply to someone I don’t personally know, but I’ve got a lot out of reading your writings since last summer and if I can return the favor I’m glad to do it. Just remember, from an outside perspective you’re actually in a pretty good place. You did what very few guys will ever do. You experienced more women then is probably good for you. Well, that’s not a bad problem to have. Now, you are at a milestone in life where it’s time to grow beyond that. Rather than despair, look at it as a new insight and a catalyst to move yourself forward.
Good look bro!
I recommend reading Personal Development for Smart People by Steve Pavlina. It’ll help you find your life purpose,among other things. Hope it helps.
Just curious if you’re helping your parents out with the bills now that you’re sitting on a load of cash and living in their house.
“Do you just not get it?? It’s like telling your friend who has a hangover to just take a few shots to make the problem go away.”
I think that is a great way to get rid of a hangover.
Along with a workout, and if you burn, twist up a J of the G-13.
Followed by a Kobe Burger and a nap.
Works every time.
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Real Hip-Hop: Shyheim, On And On feat June Luva.
# 7,#11,
Nicely put #7 I couldnt agree with you more.After one wins the “Race” then one needs to start a new one.
#11.
I had to move in with my own mother last year due to the economy and loosing a high paying job(50,000-60,000 a year)well it is was enough for my needs im single now.
But I work a regular low paying job and help moms with things like rent and food.
Im 35 years old and had been married before with 2 homes one rental property and cars paid off.
but now adays I have to “face reality”and make the best of it.
Shoot,im just glad I can still eat these days.and have a J.O.B.
I realized its was a humbling experience to say the least but im happy despite everything else crashing down( the economy,the american society)
But getting a new purpose is key.sometimes its a simple purpose like just plain “survival” and being glad to just be alive.
What else is there? You’re too smart to fall for religion, nationalism, or materialistic crap.
Helping others? I want to do that in theory, but in practice I usually find it tedious, which I guess makes me a bad guy; but maybe you won’t find it tedious.
Maybe it’s writing, or some other form of artistic expression. I think you enjoyed the process (in the Hemingway sense) of getting tail as much as the tail, it just got old; and it sounds like you still enjoy the process of writing.
completely agree. winter in DC sucks, depresses the fuk outta me every year….makes me want to get fat just for tha extra warmth……nah not really. take a flight where the girls are browner and the drinks are stronger.
Prozac
What about artistic expression by way of creative hobbies? Not material things but real hobbies? Things that give you joy.
Get into film, read more literature, expand your mind, learn an instrument (I think someone else mentioned that), there are so many incredibly rewarding experiences in this world that have nothing to do with chasing tail.
Learn to feel truly at home with who you are…find out what you like besides “ass”…
You love to travel and if you can afford to, go for it. Enjoy the other cultures and feel lucky you do not have to work at 9-5 like most of us.
Also–I know its a money suck but living on your own is a really powerful thing. Constantly living with other people is a drain on the soul as well.
So maybe take that trip to another country but stay away from hostels and get a place. Just you. And live like a native.
Good luck.
Can we get back to banging bitches and rolling over hoes?????
This blog has gone to the shitter..
Lets get back to Legs in the air and four at at time?
Go to the Peruvian Amazon and find some Ayahuasca.
“Get into film, read more literature, expand your mind, learn an instrument”
Agreed. The best part about doing these things is you can spin them into swooping more girls!
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Real Hip-Hop: Shyheim, On And On feat June Luva.
you wrote a book right? and you’re finishing another.
you’re a writer. that’s your calling. your goal/objective: writing.
keep at it… embrace it. “what else is there?” open your eyes amigo. the world awaits you. start traveling again if that’s what fuels you. and write about it so those of us stuck at a desk can share these experiences…
Neo’s answer is much more profound than most people realize.
____________
Agent Smith: Why, Mr. Anderson? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you’re fighting for something? For more than your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Anderson. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble human intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as the Matrix itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Anderson. You must know it by now. You can’t win. It’s pointless to keep fighting. Why, Mr. Anderson? Why? Why do you persist?
Neo: Because I choose to.
then come…
I was at a similar point about 8 years ago. Some bread in my pocket, and extremely unstaffed with life, like I was just floating, almost like not even existing.
So I sold all of my stuff and moved overseas, first the Middle East and now I live in Southeast Asia (Bangkok, Thailand and Jakarta, Indonesia). It was the best move I have ever made…
I can honestly say that I am now happy and fulfilled everyday without exception
James G – Expat Rock Star’s last blog post: Traveling Working Gals in the Middle East.
READ: MAN’S SEARCH FOR MEANING.
BY VIKTOR E. FRANKL
Question: why do you gamers always recommend books?
yeah read it
or…
come to Brazil
Feb 22nd 2009 Brazilian Carnival starts.Gets your tickets soon!
Have a great time in Brazil Roosh. Hope you can take plenty of pictures and perhaps visit some archaeological sites with the ladies you meet.
BTW—I think the optimal situation for a man is if he could start some sort of business that pretty much ran itself. For instance owning a successful McDonalds located off an interstate bypass somewhere. You get the profits (well most of them), and the manager has to run the place……………….while you are out there enjoying yourself. No innovation on your part necessary and very little to distract you. It would be like being born with a trust fund for the ordinary guy. Of course if you borrowed a lot of money and that didn’t work out……………yikes.
Too bad we aren’t all born with trust funds, but I digress.
Hey Roosh,
I feel exactly the same way and am in full time office work. It’s just hollow and pointless. I feel like I go to work and mastubate for 8 hours and nothing ever gets acheived except for the flow of money being moved around. No amazing things happen, it’s just full of old men in their mid-life crisis periods desperate to make lots of money..no idea why as they work 12 hours a day so could never spend it if they tried.
Luciky I have my music outside of work which is about the only thing keeping me going, but apart from that, work and existence just seems hollow.
-rdj
Minor point, but if you really think having a child would be fulfilling, Roosh, you don’t have to get married to have/adopt one.
Jesus. This post is like a dashboard confessional song. Stop being emo, get out and do something.
just follow your heart dude. money with no clear destination is not a bad problem to have.
lol @ 32!
Hey, at least Roosh has a pile of cash he’s sitting on. That’s more than a lot of people can say right now!
“I feel like I’m in life’s hospice. Just fucking around to entertain myself, wishing the clock wasn’t moving so fast.”
Well said. As a cognitive animal I feel that when survival isn’t your primary focus, a purpose in living can be tough (impossible?) to ascertain. I think the dream of a “better life” was a powerful purpose for many of our ancestors, and taking care of offspring can also provide purpose.
I’m a bit of a hedonist myself and I’m afraid that my nature of finding ways to entertain myself and seek pleasure are just distracting me from the fact that my life is without purpose and that I’m just bidding my time until I die. But really, aren’t we all?
Money
sex
power
emptyness
life is simple when you have what others dont.
“I’m a bit of a hedonist myself and I’m afraid that my nature of finding ways to entertain myself and seek pleasure are just distracting me from the fact that my life is without purpose and that I’m just bidding my time until I die. But really, aren’t we all?”
Yep.
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Body Shop West Hollywood Fire.
whoa there, you sound like me now.
everything we do is a distraction until the day we die.
i lay in bed most nights and imagine what it will be like. to die. to feel chest pains while my heart stops or spasms out of control. one day i will know what that’s like, for a moment.
smoking marijuana is fun.
and kids are the best. it helps to care for another living thing that will one day realize it’s fate, just like you did.
Sounds like you’ve done all there is to do. That and the fact that your blog sucks now. Why don’t you call it a life and kill yourself?
dont kill youself. shut down your blog.
forcing people to buy your books, and not freeload.
in the meantime move to brazil. learn portuguese.
maybe teach science classes at University of Rio if you have to…
Roosh, maybe this religion thing is worth a shot? Get in touch with your Turkish roots? Eh?! Eh?!!
Don’t quit now!
Take a break from women Roosh, you’re burned out. Get a hobby to occupy your time. Xbox, martial arts, anything. This existential despair of yours is counterproductive. Talk to your friend Roissy. He has the right idea. And stop whining, you could be in Haiti with those people eating dirt cakes.
I agree with Michael above completely. Take up something like Martial Arts. It will make you better in many ways, your physical health, your build, your mind, your willpower, coordination. I’ve been doing martial arts for 3 years now and it was one of the best decisions I’ve made. And what you said about the Hatians eating mud cakes is spot on. 90% of the world doesn’t have the time to sit around pondering the meaning of life. That’s a luxury few in the world can afford.
Yes.
Enter the Dragon:
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Big Jewel heist in Paris from Harry Winston’s boutique.
Cut that “Boredom-Existentialist Conundrum” crap you’re in!
There’s more to life than this man! (material shit and pussies included!) which you’re probably realizing right about now.
You’re in a period of your life where some of life’s value and meaning sort of lost meaning and flavour.
Dude, you’ll figure something out! You’ll have too. Either you find your purpose and passion in life or boredom…which is worst than hell in my opinion.
Roosh,
For what it’s worth, some rich people are happy. If your money is self-made, having 200 grand in the bank isn’t a bad thing.
“having 200 grand in the bank isn’t a bad thing”
Having 200k isn’t “rich” either.
– MPM
The G Manifesto’s last blog post: Oscar de la Hoya VS Manny Pacquiao Prediction.
Your problem is obvious. The problem is you. You have no passion, no affliction, no mission. Ass was your mission, but everybody gets laid… even the hillbillys in Oklahoma can get hot ass. You travel and write, but none of it is with purpose, style, or substance. You went to Brazil and lived in hostels, partied and got laid. I would suggest you go live life — i.e. not working in a bar, going out to bars, writing in bars, etc.
It seems like you are really down and not much words or encouragement is going to help you.
You have done alot of unplugging from the world and that was what I was going to recommend. So that leaves you to spending sometime with the homeless in the street and seeing where they are in life. Sure they are on the street and cold as shit. But I bet they are happier than most Americans working in corporate America.
Oaks’s last blog post: New Apartment So Far….
You’re living below your means and saving money — that is a very good thing.