Don’t Let A Girl Assert Frame Over You

Within every interaction is a frame where one person does the evaluating and judging while the other does the satisfying. The person with the higher value will naturally fall into a frame of evaluation while the person with the lower value will fall into a frame of trying to prove or appease. Without even thinking about it, many men fall into the inferior frame with women by how they allow an interaction to proceed.

Since we were children, we’ve been taught to answer questions. In school, we received rewards from the teacher if we answered correctly, and even in university we were graded for “class participation” based on impressing the professor with how well we know the material. The problem is that we carry the need to prove ourselves over into adulthood and allow others to assume superiority by answering questions that make us explain our behavior, thoughts, or actions. Most people are in fact too eager to prove themselves when asked a question, but by doing so they almost always accept the inferior frame.

For example, a common question that a woman asks you is, “What do you do?” By quickly answering her question, you automatically accept her “prove yourself to me” frame. This is why my game book Bang teaches you to not answer directly to a woman’s questions in the early periods of the interaction when you’re trying to establish attraction. The better response is to give a joke answer that shows you do not care of her evaluation. Paradoxically, this increases her attraction for you even more, because your value must be higher than hers if you refuse to do what so many men before you had eagerly done.

Another example is when a co-worker—and not your boss—asks you, “Why did you do it this way?” He is attempting to assert the superior frame by getting you to justify yourself. An answer which refuses his frame is one where you don’t explain why you did it in your preferred way. Unless he asks you “how” you did something, which establishes him as the inferior seeking to learn from you, you should not rationalize yourself. You’ll also encounter co-workers who ask tiny favors of you that escalate over time.

How do you feel when you have sex with a woman for the first time and are not satisfied with your performance? Because you feel inferior in that moment, you may say something like “It’ll be longer next time” or “I shouldn’t have drank so much.” This establishes you as the person who is supposed to do the pleasing. The woman is then more likely to see you as a weak man. A man who is confident of his worth would not be fazed by a bad sexual performance, or at least not feel the need to defend it.

It turns out that trying to justify yourself in any way is the best way to lose frame, and should only be done when the other person has repeatedly asserted the inferior frame. For example, if a woman repeatedly justifies herself in your presence, you can throw her a bone and appease her once in a while, but only if it’s what you really want to do so that she feels a basic level of security in the relationship.

It’s important to note that natural alpha males are automatically resistant to accepting the inferior frame. Their instinct tells them not to justify themselves, and they have such a high opinion of who they are that maintaining frame naturally flows from them. If you are not a natural alpha, you’ll have to do it manually by stopping and thinking each time a woman asks you a question or a favor (“Can you hold my purse?”) to decide if she’s trying to assert frame. If she is, which is usually the case, you must deflect her question. Make a joke or “agree and amplify” so she comes to the conclusion that you are the superior in the interaction. Otherwise, she will slowly drain your power and either use you for attention or to establish firm control over your behavior like we see with men who have been hen-pecked by their wives after several years of marriage.

You want to reach a point where you have high expectations of a woman but she has little expectations of you. She must give you submission while you do as you may. This will take some real value to pull off, but in the meanwhile you can simulate it by merely not falling into the frame of those who make requests and demands of you.

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pinetree
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pinetree
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Excellent post. One should approach to develop one’s frame first and second to meet a attractive girl.

Andres
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Andres
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I think the post is good, but you are approaching affairs as only dominant-dominated relationships. Thats quite short-sighted.

kazuya
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kazuya
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There are other aspects to male-female interactions, yes. But this is an important one.

Ray Allen
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Ray Allen
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If you don’t want to look stupid I suggest doing a lot more research about biology and human interactions / dynamics before commenting.

Sauron666
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Sauron666
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Not sure that’s quite what he’s saying. It’s a very subtle form of dominance I guess

Master_G
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Master_G
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A lot of people (master manipulators or trained operatives) try to disguise their attempt to assert frame by attempting to put you on the defensive by changing the tone of their voice to imply astonishment or indignation. Don’t fall for it. If you do, you’ll end up back-pedaling and getting manipulated. I have put many people on the spot by simply saying that I don’t owe you any explanation or anything else, for that matter. That’s my “cut to the chase” method. It’s reserved for obnoxious people.

anon
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anon
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Great post, very insightful. How can someone as wise and skilled as yourself still fail at truly dominating a female, as your failed relationship suggests? Are you a natural alpha male who came out of his shell very late or are you a natural beta male who’s very good at mimicking alpha behavior? If it’s the second then we have our answer smile

shut up brittney
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shut up brittney
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no one cares about one failed relationship

Lucius Clarus
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Lucius Clarus
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“…trying to justify yourself in any way is the best way to lose frame…”

Money shot.

Reminds me of Walter White saying to his brother-in-law in disgust “I’m through explaining myself.”

Chris
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Chris
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if you live in australia, this will only work with fat/ugly girls…it makes sense in theory, but when you live in a society with literally hundreds of thousands of thirsty desperate men in your own city who let women boss them around are happily accept having the inferior frame, you simply WONT get the hot girls.

Nick of Time
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Nick of Time
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So girls actually like to dominate, huh?

Anti-Gnostic
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Anti-Gnostic
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“but when you live in a society with literally hundreds of thousands of thirsty desperate men in your own city who let women boss them around are happily accept having the inferior frame…”

That is Fake News. Australian men in general control the narrative and properly game their women. Perhaps you are on the outside looking in.

Scottm
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Scottm
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its like the most feminist country on earth where the men have allowed a culture to develop where the women are entitled, where political correctness is rife, and where you constantly see men dating down when they could just get on a plane and be stunned with the increase in quality theyd be getting.

Anti-Gnostic
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Anti-Gnostic
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“its like the most feminist country on earth where the men have allowed a culture to develop where the women are entitled, where political correctness is rife, and where you constantly see men dating down when they could just get on a plane and be stunned with the increase in quality theyd be getting.”

Australia clearly does not fit this description.

TheOnceAndFutureKing
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TheOnceAndFutureKing
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isnt Australia increasing common law divorce by making the requirement only two months of dating?

Sounds pretty pozzed to me

Anti-Gnostic
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Austrialia is not pozzed. Grow up.

Chris W
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Chris W
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What happened to the latest Youtube chat? I tried to finish listening to it but it’s missing now? Did the Alt-right crazies hack you or something. Those guys are on par with the leftists.

vey
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vey
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Ham-fisted (lol) suppression on arch-leftist youtube platorm recast as attack by alt-right.

Note the language. False equivalency.

[contemplative retarded kid.jpg]

Roosh, you should do a deepdive on Propaganda. Bernays, Chomsky et al.

Roosh
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Roosh
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They took it down because of a “deceptive title”. You can watch it on Bitchute: https://www.bitchute.com/video/STQZGyaD8CE/

Chris W
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Chris W
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A mob of zombies probably organized online and decided to all flag it. Good to know there are other uncensored platforms out there. I had never heard of this site before.

Ex - trouxedor
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Ex - trouxedor
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I just came here to make sure that the women who are going to make a living in the USA / Europe do so because they can not (+) compete physically in Brazil!

There’s even an ex-neighbor who went to Spain because it gave her an indirect clue to marry her (moneyed) ex-boyfriend and that guy fell apart! Since she has a normal face and body, plus the fact that her cheeks were shaped like a wafer, she could not get her boyfriend back with money!

But how are they there? Are they trying to hunt down dating vendors? Are they content with men who earn little and try to stay permanently through the green card? Or really “working in an office building is all that’s left in life”?

Dhillon
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Dhillon
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Does this apply to all situations at work?
Example: when someone who’s not your boss but has more seniority over you asks a favour.

Nick of Time
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Nick of Time
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You need to be in alpha state of mind – everyone is under me.

Roosh
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Roosh
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Are you on the same team? Are they trying to unload work on you? Are they in a position to affect your performance evaluation? A lot of questions must be analyzed.

Dhillon
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Dhillon
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Yes. Yes. 1 of them is.

Dhillon
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Dhillon
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But in my case, it’s not a female, it’s a male.

MCGOO
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MCGOO
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In business, you use dominant frame to get a deal to go through. Getting a woman to spread her legs is also like a deal.

Sauron666
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Sauron666
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Well said. It’s important to keep it sly and subtle though

kelley
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kelley
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Extremely good advice for the game novice

Donnyboy
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Donnyboy
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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – I love reading your articles. Well written and the psychology is always dead on. Nice job!

VJ
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VJ
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Genius. Everything (80% at least) I know about core game in a post.

Oplia
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Oplia
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What habbits should I get for avoiding explaining myself?

Ray Allen
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Ray Allen
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Self control

Michael Roderick
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Michael Roderick
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I really like some of the shit that Roosh writes, I’ll give him credit where it’s due the man’s extremely smart and gives 0 fucks about PC BS which is dope, but he strikes me as a really depraved individual. theres nothing wrong with pickups and whatnot but this site focuses on sex and pickup game 80 percent of the time and Roosh writes about the important stuff, like globalism, political chicanery by leftists and the technocratic control grid and whatnot only 20 percent of the time. I think lots of us wanna hear about WHY these snakes are fucking with masculinity, not just about how to be a “real man” that gets laid which,, to be honest you are or you aren’t, no amount of reading ROK can turn soyboys into men

…and lets clear this up… IS ROOSH MUSLIM? Dude kinda looks like a headchopper, no offense. If so quit fucking Christian women. If not, carry on haha

chris
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chris
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you sound like a right thicko. I’m glad not to be inside your head. When i’m about to fuck a woman, the last thing i’m thinking is her religion or political views….

hankerow
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hankerow
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two techniques that Roosh didnt mention in his good article is something he mentioned in Bang. your default answer to any W question is “Guess…” with a smirk on your face. the answer to a favor…”can you hold my purse…can you take a picture…etc…” is “what do i get for it…” even if you get a kiss on the cheek its better than nothing…

in professional life and if a coworker you’re not interested in building an alliance with asks you “why did you do that…” is to answer “that’s exactly why i was hired…”

chris
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chris
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alpha/beta/frame etc.. it’s all irrelevant. Just be slightly more direct, confident in your gestures, smell nice, decent clothes and make sure your penis is hard and you’re able to find some holes to meet your desires

Sauron666
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Sauron666
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Can’t argue with that. Overthinking it is not gonna get the job done